Ako ang legal wife. Ano ba ang karapatan ko?

[kikaygimikera]

Hi sis. I need your advice re. the ex of my husband. My husband had a son before we got married last year. Yun ex nya parang hindi yata ma accept yung fact na my husband did not marry her. And now ginugulo kami via text and threatening na sirain ang name ko.

Nabuntis kasi ng asawa ko yun before nung mag bf-gf sila. My inlaws did not approve of the girl. My husband lived in woth the girl for almost 5 years. The girl got impatient yata because she wanted to get married and she cheated. She's claiming na she's doing it so that she can get out of their relationship. She decided to have a relationship with a close friend of ours din.

My husband chased  heror a few months kasi ayaw ng husband ko ng magulong pamilya. And then we met and nalaman ng ex gf na kami na. She was beginning to make stories about me sinisiraan ako sa mother in law ko. She was posting on FB and YM status how close my inlaws to her just to piss me off. Di ko yun pinansin.

Then I tried befriending her. I even gave money to her para sa son ng husband ko. Pag hindi sya nakakatanggap or late ang support ng husband ko sa son nila sandamakmak na mura ang abot namin. Kahot sa hindi pagsagot ng phone kasi tlog kami. Basta pag hindi nasusunod ang gusto nya abot langit ang pag iinsulto sa pagkatao namin.

Last year nagstop sya sa pag ask ng support. Ang sabi nya mag momove on na daw sila. Pero sa tingin ko kasi she knew we got married na. Tapos nagtext bigla na naggagather siya ng information aboit sa mga posts ko sa Facebook at tuturuan daw nya ako ng leksyon. Eh wala naman akong ginagawa sa kanya.

I feel harrased by this ex girlfriend pero threatens us na inabandon daw namin ang anak nya when in fact sya ang gustp mag move on? Nanahimik na daw sila pero sobra na raw ginagawa ko. Hindi ko malaman saan nanggagaling yung galit niya. I know she will not stop.

[jojo2978]

Power of prayer, Sis. God bless.

[kikaygimikera]

Thank you Jojo2978, that's what I am doing right now. Sana tumigil na. I feel so powerless. Parang wala pa din akong karapatan to speak up para sa pamilya ko, as a wife. Pag sumusugod dito yung babae, tinatago pa ako ng asawa ko, para daw iwas gulo. Hay!

[sugardrop]

Maybe it's time for you to show her that you are THE wife.

[kikaygimikera]

Sis @sugardrop, pero paano?

The last thing I know is that she texted this to my husband: "Sinisimulan ko na ang pag gather ng mga posts ng siraulo mong asawa. Marami-rami ding galit diyan at gusto syang maturuan ng leksyon."

Hindi ko malaman kung anong posts ang sinasabi niya because all I know is that I am posting my business photos (shared from my business page). Hindi ako takot actually. I just want her to STOP. Hindi ko alam if filing a case will be the next best thing to do. My husband told me not to kasi it will spark lang daw and I cannot win with his ex. Sabi kasi ng husband ko and my inlaws na "hindi ka mananalo diyan sa klase ng taong yan." Alam ko naman yun pero she won't stop eh! She even threatens my husband na she will file an abandonment case sa husband ko. My husband never abandoned their son, the ex stopped lang and sinasabi nyang mag"move-on" sila.

A friend just told me na baka the ex has a fight with other person and she's blaming me of those paninira. Sabi kasi ng friend ko, the ex posted something on her FB account na may screenshot of text messages na puro mean things. I would never EVER do that. Sobrang busy ako sa mga things-to-do ko. I even joked to my friend, "bumili na lang siya sa akin, papansinin ko pa siya" kasi my friend asked me if I was the one behind those text messages. Sabi ko eh ang nasa isip ko ngayon pera, paano kumita.

Tama ba by not doing anything eh it's one way of fighting the ex. Kasi sabi ng isa kong kaibigan, wag daw pansinin. If papatulan ko, baka isipin pa ng tao na "baka tama nga si (ex)"....

[aquacharly]

Ignore her until she hangs herself, figuratively.
Once she maligns you on FB. -- libel na yan.  Be sure you document before she deletes.  Better, ask a lawyer how to go about it --  gathering & documenting evidence against you -- parang once she does something --  ma set up mo sya.

About filing for abandonment, errr -- she means : child support. Hayan mo sya mag file, courts act exceedingly slow (kelangan pa nya mag lagay and spend for a lawyer) -- baka HS na yung bata bago mag decide your hubby should give, P1thou per month. I am not kidding, yan lang makuha ng cousin ko sa pag demanda sa ex nya na ang yaman sa Urdaneya Village nga nakatira. 

IF she drops by at sugurin ka -- sige, tapos pa Barangay mo and/or blotter that she threatened you with physical harm, disturbed your peace, etc etc etc -- pag andun ka na sa blotter/Barangay -- ask the person in charge of making the report ano ba pinaka grabe puede mo I-reklamo.

Remember this: every peso your husband gives dapat pa receive sa kanya: print & sign name & signature, with date & details (ex child support for the month of:  xxxxx).  Best if you use checks payable to Bruhilda always.

Don't lose your cool. She sounds cray cray.  Or, extremely bitter. 

[kikaygimikera]

Thank you @aquacharly. Ganyan ang ginagawa ko as of now. Hindi ko mapigilan magpost here kasi yung worry ko maistorbo ang peaceful na life namin. If you remember, I have been in a magulong marriage, thanks for your help I have filed an annulment and granted last year. Whew! Na-sort ko na ang magulong buhay before. Now, okay na okay na tapos may pagbabanta na guguluhin. So na-alarm talaga ako.

Sana hindi ko na ito i-update pa ang thread na ito. Ayoko na kasi ng panggugulo. For the VERY FIRST TIME I prayer for someone that I do not like. Siya yun. Pinagppray ko talaga na sana gumanda at umayos ang life niya para happy na siya and no more bitterness.

[aquacharly]

^Yes, we your mga sis here are happy you're in a much better place now.   That is part of the wisdom you've gained: to pray for someone you'd prefer sagasaan. May she sort herself out, and find her way.

Ang dami mo ng pinagdaanan, and now you've got what you deserve. .  Don't let this thorn shake you.  May God bless you more.