Coping with gender disappointment 😢

[poshgurl]

Hi mga sis.
I hope a lot can share or post what they are feeling towards the gender of their unborn babies.
Im currently 21 weeks preggy for my 2nd child. Had ultrasound kanina and the dr told me, parang girl.
Honestly, i felt disappointed. I know, thats terrible. And i hate myself now for feeling this way. Although sabi ng ob pwede ulitin. I should be thankful, i know. Its just that, i was really hoping for a boy and been praying very hard for it.. I dont know if this is normal.

Any of you mga sis na nkafeel nito? Pano kayo nagcope up?

[lovemeagain30]

^ second baby niyo na eto and first born niyo ay girl din right?

kung tama ang bilang na 21 weeks ka na, most likely makikita na talaga ang gender ni baby mo. kasi usual suggestion ng ob is after 20 weeks pede ng Makita sa ultrasound. siguro nafeel ng ob mo na disappointed ka kaya nagsuggest siyang pwedeng ulitin but most likely, babae nga yung dinadala mo.

bakit nga ba gusto mo ng boy, para quota na this time?  wag ka ng malungkot. isipin mo nalang yung advantages, let's say dahil girl yan ulit,, magagamit mo ulit yung mga gamit ng panganay mo without a need to buy a lot of new stuff. tapos another baby girl means another malambing person in your family. mga ganun..

ako im pregnant with my 2nd now,first born ko ay Boy,, gusto ko sana ngayon ay Girl. kasi para kumpleto pares nako. yung asawa ko, gusto parin niya Boy parin. kaya ngayon ang iniisip ko nalang kung anong ibigay, go na!    in fairness, wala rin kasi ako magagawa. hindi naman ako talagang pede mamili. salamat nalang ako at healthy yung pagbubuntis ko.

[sweetberries]

hi sis, this is my first pregnancy and before ako magpa gender scan, im really hoping for a baby girl but then it turned out to be a baby boy. At first parang nadisappoint but siguro ilang minutes lang yun kasi after i saw my husband na super duper happy, naging masaya na rin ako. and i just think na, dati nga baby lang ang hiniling ko at binigay naman ni god tas magiging disappointed pa ba ako dahil di yung gender ng baby yung binigay sakin basta healthy and normal si baby go na ako dun. Im always thinking na blessing na sa amin to ni hubby since we waited for almost 9 months na trying to conceive at since i have pcos din kaya napaka swerte ko na magkaron ng baby in that span of time

tama si sis lovemeagain na think of the positive side na lang. at least another baby girl na malambing and no need to buy new stuff since you have baby girl stuff na

[GMGravity]

^same here sis, baby girl din sana gusto ko but after malaman gender ni baby at 19 weeks and boy nga, hindi naman ako nadisappoint. Mahalaga naman kasi is healthy si baby di ba?

Poshgurl huwag ka na ma-sad kasi marami nga diyan na kahit anong gawin nila, hindi magbuntis di ba? Dapat thankful tayo na binigyan tayo ng ganitong blessings ni God. Also, who knows, kahit girl si baby eh siya ang maging next big name sa future di ba? Why nga pala gusto mo boy sis?

[poshgurl]

Thanks sa mga reply sis. Yup 2nd baby ko na and my eldest ay girl. Kaya hoping ako for boy, kasi para tig isa na, quota na. And my husband kasi bunso sa family nya and sya na lang chance ng dad nya magdala ng last name. Chinese kasi, big deal rin kasi sa mga chinese kapag boy. So yun.
Thanks mga sis ha. Medyo nacocondition ko na sarili ko ngayon. Iniisip ko dapat happy and thankful talaga ako.

[GMGravity]

^i see naintindihan ko na ang feeling mo now sis, bibiruin nga sana kita about that kasi nga napapanuod ko sa mga drama series na mayroon pa ipinagpapalit baby nila para lang matiyak na may baby boy sila candidate para maging crown prince someday 

[aquacharly]

Well, our 1st is a girl. The 2nd 1 - we really didn't care again about the gender -- basta normal.
So I don't do ultrasound  to know the sex. Sabi ng doc ko:  what can you do? Yeah, you just take what you get. Lol.

BUT when I found in the operating room the 2nd 1 was a boy -- feeling ko:  ok, quota done. As my brother-in-law says: Boundary na. Lol.  I really felt relieved we had a son.  Wala na ko paki if after, we have 10 daughters. Lol.
Tuwang tuwa my husband.  (Pero he was just as tuwa with the 1st baby, the girl).  As for the tactless, we heard:  Only a man can make a man. Susko.

My husband is also the only hope too of his family.  His 2 brothers have 5 girls between them.  The wives can't have more kids, due to health reasons/ pregnancy complications.  So, talagang  madami dasal ng parents in law ko.  My husband didn't feel pressured, same here.  Basta normal & healthy, period.

[angeleigh]

I would like to have a baby girl. And i too, think that i will be disappointed kapag naging boy baby ko....

[seven82]

nung pregnant ako with my daughter, halos lahat sinasabi na boy magiging baby namin. siguro 3 lang nagsabi na girl. pati in laws ko sabi din na boy magiging baby namin, and alam kong gusto nila ng boy. only son kasi husband ko so siya lang din pagasa. then nagpa ultrasound kami nakatalikod si baby but sabi ng OB ko kung siya tatanungin e girl daw. naramdaman ko din yung disappointment but sandali lang. husband ko naman hindi big deal sa kanya kung girl o boy as long as healthy ako and si baby  now medyo madami na kaming naririnig na sundan na and this time boy naman daw.

[poshgurl]

thanks mga sis. nakakagaan rin ng feeling kapag may ibang tao ka napapagsabihan about this matter.
next month na ulit ako magpapa scan. unti unti na rin natatanggap ng sarili ko na kahit ano importante, maayos and healthy kami ni baby. i feel guilty nga. kapg gumagalaw tuloy si baby sa tummy, kinakausap ko, sinasabi ko, love ko sya and im sorry kung nalulungkot ako kapag hindi sya boy. hehe. para ngang sumasagot, minsan ang lakas lakas ng kik or galaw nya. parang mas malakas pa sya sa eldest ko noon kapag gumalaw sa tummy. :-)

siguro natural lang din pagdaanan ng isang buntis ito mga sis noh?
 

[lovemeagain30]

Okay lang yan sis poshgurl! don't be hard on yourself. normal sa buntis na parang feeling lagging naguguilty kapag may gusto ka or mga plano tapos it goes against your will and you feel bad. feeling mo masama kang ina just because of what you think and feel about it!hahaha. it's normal.

you're not a bad mom, think of it as part of the raging hormones you have now. 

[poshgurl]

heehee  oo nga sis @lovemeagain30. thank you 

[ikaela]

I love this thread. Akala ko unang sasagot e yung mga "pasalamat ka nga kaya mo magbuntis." I find it refreshing to read everyone's honesty. Ang hirap na nga magbuntis, may dagadag pressure pa to have a specific gender.

[poshgurl]

Me too sis ikaela. Big help talaga kapag may nasasabihan ka. Made this thread kasi im sure im not the only one na nakakaranas nito. 😊

[teal_rayy]

^ I was disappointed for a minute or two, but when I saw my husband's reaction to our baby girl, I was really happy narin   At the end of the day, I just want a healthy baby who will be my junior.  Ang gulo gulo lang ng baby girl ko in my tummy.

[ilovemybaby01]

hoping for a baby boy din . papa ultrasound ako may 13 or may 19 pag 17 weeks na si baby .. plan ko talaga magpa ultrasound ng maaga para di pa 100% sure ! para if ever man na girl ma ready ko na sarili ko sa next ultrasound ko . parehas kasi kami ni hubby na gusto boy . kinakabahan ako sa magiging reaksyon ko pag nalaman kong girl si baby ! ayokong madissapoint pero umaasa talaga kong boy si baby haist

[lovemeagain30]

^sayang naman sis kung aagahan mo yung ultrasound. usually its on the 20th week talaga. ewan ko kung pumapayag ang sonologist kung earlier than 20 weeks eh pede na.

I had mine @ 19 weeks. Nuong hindi pa kami nag papa anomaly ultrasound, the doctor guess it's a girl based sa normal scan na ginagawa niya whenever I have my regular check up. ganun kasi ditto sa ospital nila they have regular scanning (di ko lang lam medical term) sa room mismo ng OB.

fast forward when we confirmed its a girl, nagulat ako para sa sarili ko kasi may Boy na kasi kami, ngayon Girl naman. Gusto ng husband ko eh Boy ulit. siyempre yun ang gusto niya, gusto ko narin sana. kaso nung lumabas na babae, bago ako ma disappoint I looked at my husband reaction and he was genuinely happy to hear its going to be a "healthy" baby girl (according sa sonologist at OB). natuwa kami kasi at this time ang prayers talaga namin maging healthy at buo ang katawan ng baby pati na rin sana maging maayos ang panganganak ko.

[ilovemybaby01]

^ may mga nabasa ako sis na 16 weeks pa lang nalalaman na nila gender ng baby nila pero yung iba  hindi pa 100% sure .

gusto ko din kasi makitang gumagalaw si baby kaya ok lang sana kahit hindi pa sure yung gender . hehe

congrats sis quota na kayo

[ayami]

Hay this thread made me feel nostalgic. Honestly speaking until now may feelings ako ng disappointment sa 2nd son ko. Goal ko rin makaquota na at the age of 23. E hindi nangyari. So now, many people are telling me to try for a third baby na hindi ko naman na gusto.

16 weeks nalaman na boy si baby. Nung una hoping pa ko na mali kasi everyone's telling me na glowing ako etc kaya girl na. Pero ayun nagpa 3D utz ako boy talaga

Pero ngayon naman kasama ko na si baby syempre anak ko pa rin to at pinaghirapan ko for 10 months so natanggap ko naman haha. Pag nakakabalita lang ako sa mga high school classmates ko na nakaquota ayun medyo naiinggit ako

[iamsell]

Sana di ko mafeel yung ganyan disappointment. I'm 22 weeks now pero di pa ako nakapag gender scan. We are planning to have a 3D/4D ultrasound sana.

Actually I'm a bit kabado magpaultrasound..ewan ko ba. Baka may makita kasi na di okay or something. hehe paranoid lang. This is our first baby and I really want a baby girl. Gusto ko kasi maayusan at madadamitan ko sya ng mga girly clothes. But my hubby wants a baby boy para daw maturuan naman nya magbasketball. Pero recently nagbago ang isip parang gusto na lang daw niya eh girl kasi kuya nya is having a baby boy na baka daw magkaroon ng rival sa attention paglaki.

Honestly, baka madisappoint din ako if ever na baby boy, kasi baby girl talaga ang gusto kong first baby eversince kahit nung dalaga pa ako. Pero iniisip ko na lang basta healthy at complete si baby yun ang pinaka importante. At gaya nyo blessed din ako mabigyan ni Lord ng baby. Newly wed lang kasi ako nung December at sobrang thankful na nablessed agad to have baby.