In Laws as your Helper

[mommycute46]

Recently, we had a fight with hubby regarding our set-up, me as the breadwinner and him as the one who takes care of our only son who is now 2 years old. To cut it short we agreed for him to work and we will look for a yaya at siya ang magpapasweldo. Our prospect referred by Sister in Law 1--hindi natuloy for some reasons. Now hubby talked to his other sister--Sister in Law 2 (who have a family with an adopted son turning 4) to be with us on the weekdays while I'm at work. We are here in Pasig renting a small room at ang si Sister In Law 2 is nasa Cavite. So ang set up na pinag usapan nila Monday-Friday dito sila sa akin and on weekends uwi sila sa Cavite since weekend din umuuwi ang asawa niya. My hubby will work in Baguio tapos padala every month ng sahod ni sister in law.

When hubby told me this, medyo naasar ako because he didn't even ask me kung gusto ko makasama sister niya 5 days a week. My reasons are:

-lahat ng kapatid niyang babae are known for being b****, yong tipong nakikipagsuntukan sa kapit bahay pag tsinismis or naasar
-etong sister in law ko na to sobra kung makapalo sa adopted son niya. I don't even want to imagine my son na pinapalo niya or minimura niya with those ugly words such as "**ta ina" etc
-2 and 4 years old boys madalas mag away.
-Now I only care to feed 3 people (me,hubby & son) pero kapag natuloy to magiging apat na pakakainin ko
-Uwian sila ng weekend, what if may emergency sa office and I need be there on weekends

We are in good terms ng mga in laws ko naman. I just respect them basta hindi nila ako ina [textspeak!] tahimik lang ako. Eto lang yong parang ayoko mangyari, yong makasama ko sila sa iisang bahay. Ayokong eto ang pagsimulan ng conflict namin.

Please share your similar experiences, comments, suggestion etc.

Thank you in advance.

[BDJ]

This is very alarming. So dapat make it stronger sa pag insist to your hubby na huwag yung kapatid niya ang mag-alaga sa anak mo because of her attitude. Kung ako nasa lagay mo of course ayokong magkaroon ng conflict with in laws dahil sa mga anticipated na pwedeng mangyari. Bottomline here is huwag na huwag kang papayag na in law mo mag-alaga dahil kadalasan sa mga nakakasama nila sa bahay natututunan yung magiging manners nila lalo na yung mga lumalabas sa bibig.

Buntis pa lang ako pero actually ganyan ang worry ko sa Granny in law ko dito sa bahay. She has her attitude too tapos ang lalaswa ng mga lumalabas sa bibig niya. Like I said to may other posts in other thread may pagka asal squatter siya and wala siyang breeding when she talks. I even told my mom about that too. So I informed my hubby una kapag nag attitude siya ulit sa akin habang andyan yung bata then I have no second thoughts to go home straight at dun ko aalagaan mag isa yung bata. I really told my hubby na yun ang lalong magpapahirap sa situation namin dahil in the first place taking care of the baby is already challenging, kung magdadagdag lang ng stress itong Lola then my patience is over. Kung ito nga lang pregnancy ko na stress ako dahil sa kanya lang. Then again I will inform my hubby for second time around that there are things that is totally alarming about his granny. I also encountered on how my in law treated her grand child which is pinsan naman ito ng hubby ko, again alarming to me dahil hindi ako papayag na gagawin niya rin yan sa magiging anak namin tapos makikipagtalo na ako? Ayoko nga pumatol sa matanda eh!

She keeps on shouting sa 15 year old na apo niya. Yes okay sana yung context ng advises niya pero kung stressful way yung pagdisiplina niya then I don't think it will work parati sa nakikinig sa kanya.

Bragging about her hardship in life na comparing parati sa recent na ginagawa ng mga tao ngayon.

The intake of the rice is totally alarming na pilit niyang pinapakain sa apo niya sabay gusto pauubusin. She can't dictate the appetite of other people. Akala niya nakakabuti but actually it is unethical already dahil nakakasama sa health yung gusto niyang mangyari eh! It is even illogical.

She uses foul languages all the time.

Ayokong gawin niya ito sa anak namin, she has an attitude pa man din of being manipulative. Ayoko naman makaranas yung anak namin sa environment na napaka unhealthy, stressful or depressing. Lalong lalo ayoko yung titirisin lang yung bata everytime. tsk tsk tsk!!!!

[aquacharly]

Living with in-laws is always bad news.
Avoid at all cost.

But that's just my opinion. What do I know anyway.
I never lived with in- laws.  Still, naka bangga ko pa a Bobita, insecure, inggitera SIL.

[Cheesecak3]

It is always a NO No for me to live with in laws lalo na kung hindi ko naman kasundo. I'd rather get a househelp na hindi ko kaano ano at least mas madaling maturuan sa gawaing bahay na hindi ko na kailangan pang mailang.