Congrats nga pala sa mga ikakasal 
ako din ikakasal na 
Salamat.. Sobrang Excited na nga ako. Congrats din sis!
Sa mga ka-sis natin dito na nakapag-move on na rin at natauhan ng maagang kagaya ko eh congratulations sa inyo. What happened in my life was not something to be proud of pero nakakatuwa lang din na kapag maliwanag na ang iyong kaisipan at bilang isang babaeng nasa ganyang sitwasyon noon eh mas madali mo nang matanggap ang mga bagay-bagay dahil hindi ka na nabubulagan lang.
Tama, being a mistress is a choice. She can be a victim at first but a criminal afterwards 'kung' kukunsintihin niya ang sitwasyon. However, the mistress is not-at-all at fault here based on my experience. I am not in any way defending myself pero sa pagkakaalala ko noon eh when how many times I tried cutting the relationship I still end up going back to my ex-AF(affair partner) again because
that is when he does things that will make me fall back. However, the cycle went on repeating until I got tired and was finally able to accept the REALITY na there will never be us, he will never choose me, at kahit na gaano pa niya at ilang beses pa niyang sabihin na mahal niya ako eh there's a nagging feeling deep within me na 'iyon' lang talaga ang gusto niya. Afterwards, I cut off everything. All communication ties. Even in my mind. I really helped myself. I read all the advices on how to get out of an affair, how to move on, as in really, really helped myself.
Sobrang mahirap sa simula pero eventually you'll be thankful na nakalabas ka sa masarap-sa-una-ngunit-masalimuot-at-kahiya-hiyang sitwasyon na kinasadlakan mo.
And yes, one of the reasons why others chose to stay in an affair and cannot leave an affair is because they're being blinded since they're wearing rose-colored glasses which means that they're living in a fantasy since everytime they meet, wala silang nae-encounter na realidad na hirap ng buhay na pinagdaraanan ng isang mag-asawa/live-in partner. Lagi silang masaya, kumakain sa labas, nanonood ng sine, check-in, gifts, hugs, kisses, happily-ever-after, idea of being soulmate, and the worst thing is the feeling of being aware not to get caught, the mystery, the kept relationship heightens and feeds the illicit affair.
Mistresses - IMO though not solely responsible for extra-marital affairs - are selfish and disrespectful of family values and worse, they do not feel accountable for their actions.
I perfectly respect your opinion on this it's just that I hope you won't generalize them. Some were raised on a family with a good virtue and yes, they DO FEEL ACCOUNTABLE for their actions. However, based on my case before, when I
was still
blinded and IN DENIAL TO THE REALITY,
I CHOSE NOT to be responsible for my actions to which
I was TOTALLY AWARE that it's WRONG.
And may I add that
the feeling of being wanted also feeds the craving of both affair partners for each other. Usually kasi si mistress pag naiisip niya na gustung-gusto siya ni guy even though he already has a wife makes her feel na parang nasa pedestal siya, na itinataas ang bandana niya, hanggang sa ma-trap na siya into delirium kakaisip na pipiliin din siya pagdating ng panahon, na pakakasalan din siya, na soulmates talaga sila, making her blinded with the
REALITY NA HINDI TALAGA GANUN ANG SITWASYON.Totoo ang kasabihang 'PALAY NA ANG LUMALAPIT, TUTUKAIN NALANG'. totoo yun sisses. Ang mga lalaki, aminin man natin o hindi, when they get an opportunity to bang, they'll get it. Because they have the ability(based on scientific research and proven and tested surveys) to SEGREGATE LUST from LOVE. Whereas sa mga babae, it's so easy to fall and mistake lust from love.
Sa mga nabasa kong blogs na nahuli ng misis yung mister na may kabit, usually they reason out na KESYO INAKIT LANG DAW SIYA, KESYO PA-CUTE DAW NG PA-CUTE AT SIYA(kabit) PA ANG NAG-I-INITIATE NG FIRST MOVE, pero in reality
nung di pa nadi-discover relationship nila, eh ang sweet-sweet niya, binibigay ang langit at lupa kay mistress, nire-regaluhan din ng kung
[textspeak!]-ano, pero like what I've said at the end of the day hindi pa rin siya pipiliin dahil guys
KNOW WHO THEY REALLY WANT TO BE WITH FOR THE REST OF THEIR LIVES. Kahit ang mga lalaki eh nagloloko, alam pa rin nila kung sino ang karapat-dapat igalang at mahalin at pakasalan.
At nakalu-lungkot mang isipin eh, hindi kailanman napipili ang mga pumatol na sa may asawa/gf/live-in partners. If I remembered it correctlyn sa isa sa mga nabasa ko, 5% of men chose to be with their affair partners when they got caught but only 2% in those ended succesfully in marrying each other. And some in those 2% divorced after some time.
Kaya in a way, yung mga babaing third party-aka-otherwoman-aka-kabit na nahulog na ang loob at nagmahal eh nagiging biktima rin. However, they can't blame anyone but themselves alone. Ang mahirap pa rito,
WALA SILANG MAPAGKAKATIWALAAN NA MAPAGLABASAN NG SAMA NG LOOB dahil nga iba ang judgment sa babaing kabit kesa sa lalaking kabit.
Yun ang
norm.
Pero ang
TAMA is, ke babae o lalaki man,
hindi dapat nagiging unfaithful.
Tapos, hindi rin naman usually hinihiwalayan ng asawang babae ang nangaliwang lalake dahil at the end of the day mahal pa rin niya ito. And most of the time, wives consider themselves at fault as to why their husband had an affair. So she makes a move to take a look at their relationship more carefully and if the wife has an open mind, even willing to change herself and ways just to get her husband back again.
Hello? Nagsimula kaya sa pagliligawan ang relationship nila. Nagsimula kaya sila sa friendship, sa ligaw-ligawan, sa getting-to-know-each-other stage muna at nagkaroon pa ng matamis na 'oo' at 'I do' sa pagitan ng isa't isa na alam ng lahat at hindi patago. Take note, my honeymoon pa! So tingnan naman natin kung gano kalalim at katibay ang pundasyon ng dalawang taong TUNAY NA NAGMAMAHALAN AT MAY MAGANDANG SINIMULAN kaysa sa isang RELASYON NA NAGSIMULA SA ISANG KASINUNGALINGAN NA PUNUNG-PUNO NG PAGTATAGO AT KATARANTA*UHAN.
Mahirap tibagin yun. Kaya si mistress, well(can we atleast say kawawa?), at the end of the day, maiiwan pa ring luhaan.
Ang masaklap lang, sana kung may mga sis tayong nasa ganyan paring sitwasyon ngayon eh matauhan na habang maaga at kaya pa nilang makalabas at makabitaw bago pa madamay ang anak ng may anak at pamilya ng may pamilya. Na-realize ko, kahit gaano pa kapangit ang pagsasama ng isang mag-asawa, live-in partners, mag-bf/gf, dapat hands-off lagi tayo because THEY SHOULD RESOLVE THEIR ISSUES THEMSELVES FIRST. Kung girl tayo at may boy na nanghingi ng advice kasi ganito na yung relationship nila and vise-versa, we shouldn't entertain it because it's crystal clear that they aren't willing to fix it up with their partners dahil it shows how easy is it for them to spill the beans with other people. Kung mahal mo ang iyong partner/asawa/bf/gf, hindi mo siya ipapahiya
in ANY way. Kahit on the rocks na ang relationship ninyo. Hangga't kayang i-solve, i-solve. At huwag munang maglabas ng hinanaing sa kaibigang babae o lalaki.
Isa rin kasi yan sa mga simulain ng pagkakaroon ng third party/affair.
Yun lang po.
