Someone you used to date gets back in touch?

[bananahoneycake]

Hello. First post and I'm excited!

Apologies in advance kung mababaw, not so experienced ako sa dating eh. This guy, I dated him briefly last year. I liked him a loooot, kaso after the 4th date sinabi ko sa kanya na it's for the best that we end things dahil I saw na we're fundamentally incompatible padating sa values & goals ( for example, I'm looking for a serious relationship that will lead to marriage and kids, siya naman unsure). Kahit masakit at gustong gusto ko siya, I chose to let him go kasi rationally I know it won't work (I assessed that he has a lot of growing up to do). After a month, he reaches out and wants to try again. We tried kaso the same issues popped up, so we made a pact na we should never contact each other kasi nga ayokong ma-attach at maging blinded by "emotions" when I have already decided na it just won't work.

6 months later he gets back in touch to say "How's life?" Ako naman, siyempre I've been thinking of him all this time parin, I responded innocently. Hanggang naging conversation, he told me about his new job, tinanong ako if I'm still at my old job and kamusta na raw yung love life ko. I told him I got a new job and also started a small company, not dating anyone. Reply naman niya na he's seeing someone, friend of a friend daw. Nako, nainis ako. Not because of selos per se, but because I just didn't wanna know that! Plus we originally made an agreement diba, not to talk to each other (my reason, para makamove on ako sa kanya). Tapos siya 'tong magiinitiate ng conversation tapos meron naman palang gf. What's the point? Why didn't he just leave me alone?

I need words of wisdom, if you have time. Just curious how you would react to this if you were in my shoes. I know in my head and heart, gotta let this go because it's not worth fussing over, kaso siyempre inis talaga ko dahil his reaching out unsettled my peace of mind.

Many thanks for reading.

[simang]

Hi Sis! Yey congrats on your first post! Hihi

First thing, saludo ako sa pag-end mo ng dating nyo before dahil alam mong hindi kayo compatible. I mean that just shows how much you know yourself and your worth, and hindi mo basta basta babaliin ang values at goals mo sa buhay just to be with someone you like (na for sure eh hindi naman worth it since di nga kayo parehas ng ideals).

Second, is that i guess you have to stick to your guns. Pinutol mo na ang communication nyo noon, so stick to that. I mean if he decides to contact you, it doesnt mean you have to reply. And to answer your question na why cant he just leave you alone.. Well truth is i cant answer that hahaha pero i think whether or not kausapin ka nya or magkaron ulit kayo ng communication, ikaw ang magdedecide kung magtetake action ka. If he contacts you again, you can either make him think na you've been waiting for that moment na magkausap ulit kayo, or make him believe na he was just a guy you dated and that phase was over and you're happy on your own. Your choice.

Im guessing the problem here is that you really liked him. Now that he's seeing someone else, there's another reason not to be infatuated by this person.

[Ireneeeeee]

for me, you should totally ignore him. walang naman din mangyayari dyan and there's no point getting in touch with him again. Mahirap pa kasi may gf tapos manglalandi landi sya. Better stay away from him na lang. Entertain other suitors and be fabulous! Don't let this guy waste your time.

[aquacharly]

Nothing has changed with regards to your outlook, and he's still the same.
Why get upset? 
People are what they are, after all (that includes you). 
Any disappointment you experienced, you already did months ago --  there is no need to repeat it all.

So, yang grrrr mo seems out of sync.
Tone down your emotions, tone down your expectations.
Kasi naman, hindi como dating or calling -- eh, out to marry na.   
The generic label for those activities:  Socializing. 

[Girltalker2]

Maghanap ka ng ibang inspiration. Go out with friends, magpaganda ka, hanap ka ng bagong crush, and magsocialize ka muna with others para di mo masyado naiisip yung naka date mong guy.