To all married wives: Will you consider living in with your in-laws?

[Prunella]

No.  Just no. My husband and I both love our privacy.

[getslimmed]

i live with his parents ang prob ko is how to call his mom  "mama" nahihiya pa din kasi ako. kayo after ba ng wedding mama na agad ang tawag nyo?

[gt76]

No. Before we got married may usapan na kame at plans na separate kame ng tirahan sa mga parents namin. At pinag usapan namin all about money matters para klaro lahat.

[Baby Madeline]

NO. There's always going to be only one queen in a household. I intend to be a queen in our own palace, no matter how small or simple it is.

[gracia_14]

we are not yet married but soon by march 2014,, and yes i considered living with my in-laws super bait kasi nila and ng mga sister and brother in laws ko they took care of us (me and my son) specially now na nasa abroad si partner.. 
 
but soon i also want to have our own house narin mas matututo ka kasi as wife if you have your own place talaga...

[margeL]

i live with his parents ang prob ko is how to call his mom  "mama" nahihiya pa din kasi ako. kayo after ba ng wedding mama na agad ang tawag nyo?

Ako sis, nahihiya rin ako before. Pero sabi ng mom ko, I have to call her mama as often as I could, dahil parang music to their ears daw yun. Simple way, pero it makes them feel special daw

[ice angel]

Big NO!!!

[getslimmed]

margeL: naiilang ako hahaha hindi ko alam kung paano haha pero dapat nga din daw.

[GMGravity]

If may pang rent naman kami ng house, I don't think I'll consider living with them. Mas maganda parin ang separate kayo. Matututo kayo sa isa't isa lalo na sa mga newly weds.

[kreez]

I have never tried to live with my in laws (well except for a couple of weeks when we are back in Manila for our vacation or for the 2 months that she visited us here) pero I don't think I'd like to live with them permanently.  My mom in law is nice naman kaya lang I still want to be the queen bee in my own home

[nicoletta]

The most is going on vacation with them for 3 weeks.  That was it.  I have a weird sleeping habit, I sleep late, and I wake up late.  They might not understand my body clock.

[Crazylabel]

No

[Awesomecakes]

How will you consider if nakaset na sa mind ni hubby to be niyo na sa house nila kayo titira? Plus he's currently financing the renovation of their house kasi nga he's living their for good.. I'm afraid this might be a problem before we get married. He's too family oriented kasi and I think I cannot live without his family. Please, enlighten me.. I want this to be a win-win situation for both of us. Alam ko he's decided na pero ayoko talaga. At least not for good.

[Priceless]

It depends. How much of a deal breaker is it for you? How much do you really value your independence? What's his/your views on independent life? Magkatugma ba?

I would say that you probably need to think long and hard about what your negotiables and non-negotiables are. Family orientedness need not mean not being able to/not wanting to standing on your own two feet. Family orientedness is a very nice quality to have, but it becomes very tiring to drag along someone who hasn't (and will never be ready to) cut the apron strings (including everyone in the family tied to them aprons!).

I suggest talk to him about your personal dreams and plans, and see kung match kayo. How much does he value your dreams and your vision for the family that you're about to create? If he doesn't have the same values, dreams and plans as yours, what can you both do to be aligned?

Tandaan, marriage is intended to last a lifetime. I think that's too long to be suffering and being unhappy if your husband to be insists on having his way all the time.

[izabelle]

somehow, "halos" lahat ng tao gusto na meron silang "sarili" nilang bahay. Iba pa din ang may sarili.

Ayoko ng idea na nakikitira ako, regardless kahit gano kabait ILs ko.. I would rather live in an apartment kesa meron ILs na pinapakisamahan.

[MrsCaancan]

For me sis it's a big NO! Mas maganda bumukod kasi you guys are gonna start a family of your own eh. Mas maganda un own house, own rules, etc.

I was once like you na I really got along with his parents and family but I assure you it would change. Me and hubby has been together for 9 years before we got married but then nun palapit na palapit un wedding they changed and until now I can feel that they don't like me kahit may 1st apo na sila..

But maybe Baka ako Lang nakaranas nito.

But you both need to talk about this and hear his side and hear your side too.

Good luck sis

[jennylee27]

Mga sis, I need your advice on this one.

Right now, we're currently living with my father-in-law.

Gusto na sana namin bumukod kaya lang parang nagaalala din kame sa F.I.L. ko. Magiging magisa nalang kasi siya sa house, together with my tita (MIL's sister) and one kasambahay. My MIL and his other kids are already living in the states. To tell you honestly, wala akong tiwala dun sa tita and kasambahay namin (long story).

We have funds to build our own home, but then nagwoworry kameng iwan ang F.I.L ko. So right now, I'm torn between building our own house, or to renovate my FILs house. Lumalaki na rin kasi ang family namin. The title of the house is already under my husband's name (pamana).

We don't have problems at home. Hindi naman nangingialam ang F.I.L ko sa isyu naming magasawa. Minsan, siya pa nga ang namamagitan if nakikita niya kameng nagaaway. Wala rin siyang financial problem  He is still working (still good for 2 years), and is receiving a very significant amount of salary.

Wala kameng inaasa sa kanya. My husband and I give contributions for the household (gasul, groceries, tubig, etc). We also finance all our family expenses.

So what do you think mga sis? Bubukod ba kame, or should we stay with my F.I.L.?

[mamaneng]

Ok lang naman to live with inlaws pero wag naman magtagal. Kung kaya na financially then dapat bumukod na. Madami learnings Ng husband and wife pag nagstart na sila to build their own home. 

[bagaholic_chewy]

^ ako personally, in that particular situation, I'll probably stay. Since the house title is under your husband's name, ok lang if you spend for the renovation since it's technically your house na. And it seems you have a significant say naman in running the household, so the set-up is working well. I noticed na mas nagkakaron ng issue pag living under the same roof na anjan si MIL and/or siblings-in-law, and me dependency sila in one way or another...

unless, you feel that the house space is small/cramped na (even after renovations) for your growing family. In that case, I'll most probably choose to move out to a more spacious house. But siguro, I'll (or husband will) ask F.IL muna kung ok lang ba sya maiwan mag-isa. Just to take in his inputs din. Or perhaps consider moving some place na medyo near lang so easier for you to check on or visit F.IL from time to time.

[brendzy]

No. Long before we got married, nag-usap na kami na bubukod kami, even na magrent muna, which happened naman. I am ok with my in-laws, ok lang din yung 1 week na stay but longer than that, I don't think so. hehe, somehow kasi I am a moody person and my husband knows that.