To all married wives: Will you consider living in with your in-laws?

[ching-chung-chang]

big NO... the only time I will consider is if we become totally broke and homeless. and it will only be temporary. Why? I've seen more than a couple of break-ups and damaged relationships with in-laws because of this.

[red_one]

tapos isa pa kaya ayaw ko din, halos kay hubby na kasi inaasa ang financial kapag nandun sya lalo. basta may bibilhin lagi kay hubby nakahingi  kahit nandun din naman iba nya kapatid. kaya naisip ko, paano na kung dun kami permanent nakatira. i'm not madamot naman, kaso hubby has difficulty saying no or wala budget unlike sa house ng parents ko they know na i have my own family na kaya di nila ko sobra inaasahan. yung binibigay ko sa kanila sobra sobra na pasalamat nila dun.

ako nga sis minsan napapaisip, masyado ba malaki sahod ng asawa ko at ganun nalang kung makahingi sila sa brother nila? kasi ang alam ko di naman ganun kalaki sahod ng hubby ko. pero hingi pa rin sila ng hingi.

[lent0t]

no, never again kahit we're in good terms. i will never live with them again kahit sino pa sa relatives ng hubby ko. also, i do not want us living with my parents/relatives too.

it's for our privacy and peace of mind.

[soumy01]

no mukhang hindi magiging mapayapa ang mundo namin haha... mabait inlaws lalo na MIL ko pero kasi may mga bagay na hindi kasi pinagkakasunduan ang father inlaw ko saka ang husband ko (sila talagang mag-ama) magkaiba yung mga prinsipyo nila sa buhay.

kung sa akin mahihirapan din ako kasi ayoko nung may nakikialam sa akin,matigas ulo ko. 

naalala ko tuloy nung tumira yung bil ko sa amin non, nag away kami dumating pa sa point na pinapili ko yung husband at umuwi ako sa bahay ng parents ko, sumunod naman yung husband ko pati siya dun na nagstay sa amin.  pero ok na kami nung BIL ko ngayun.

tama na yung baka-bakasyon lang.

[lisse]

minsan talaga kahit gaano pa kabait yung tao, meron at meron pa ring magiging cause ng friction. may mga times kasi na wala tayo sa mood maging sociable or accommodating. eh parang ang hirap gumalaw non if 24/7 kasama mo mga in-laws mo diba. like may mga times na feel lang natin magkulong sa kwarto or tahimik lang or simply be left alone and do stuff by ourselves. eh since may ibang tao sa bahay and hindi yun sayo, obligado ka na kausapin sila or makipag usap kahit na all you want is some peace and quiet especially if galing sa work. that doesn't mean naman na masama agad ang isang party or something is wrong. it could be that living with extended family/relatives, whether they're on our side or that of our spouses, just won't work.

[aspen11]

Hello mga sis. Konting backstory lang.

When my husband and I got married, we were very young. We just had a child, I was still in school and kaka-start lang sa work ni hubby. We had no choice but to live with my in-laws. I am very lucky kasi wala akong naging problema sa kanila. Sobra silang mabait and generous sa amin.

After 6 years of marriage, nag-decide na kami bumukod. Actually at that time, we still weren't sure kung ready na kami kasi meron na kaming 3 kids, 2 of them nag-aaral na. But we pushed through with it and our greatest discovery is... "you won't know unless you try."

Kahit sobrang mabait ang in-laws ko, iba pa rin yung may sarili kayong space. Yung hindi ka mag-worry sa mga kinikilos mo and malaya ka na gawin kung ano gusto mo. I can discipline my kids the way that I want them to be disciplined. Kasi nung doon pa kami nakatira sa in-laws ko, naspoiled yung mga bata. Swerte ko din naman kasi kahit yung husband ko, narealize niya yung difference ng may sariling bahay. Kahit siya ayaw na bumalik dun sa kanila haha.

[nicole_shinji]

Depende, pag mayaman ang hubby ko na kaya naman bumili ng sarili namin . dun ako. pero kung wala naman , practical lang. okay lang sakin sa inlaws kesa naman pilitin namin na magka condo na di naman kasya sa income namin.

[Cmay]

For me its a big "NO" lalo na kung alam kong super magkaiba kami ng ugali ni Mother - in - law. Kasi nung mag BF GF palang kami ni hubby, inisip ko na talaga na hindi kami titira sa inlaws ko. Lalo na kasi pag regarding na sa decision making ayaw ko na may nakikialam saming dalawa ni hubby.  Evan the way we live. Para iwas na din sa gulo They say nga na di pwedeng dalang queen sa isang palasyo

[Kady_14]

Oo naman, I've lived with them twice and no problem if I would again. Sarap ng buhay ko dun,  well lahat kami when we lived with them. Free everything. All I had to buy were kiddie snacks for my kids. My Father in law is the kind na gusto his grandkids have the best toys and super spoiler. Gives 1k kada line of 9's sa test. Haayy. While my MIL naman super dali ayain or impluwensya han. We would have home service massages max of 2x a week. Hahaha plus when I was there the kids were always in their room nagkakalat. Alam nila bawal sa room namin.

Depende siguro sa inlaws. But we moved back to our house in 2010 since Manila based na ulit si husband. Minsan pag weekends we go there and sleep over.

[Pink_Sugar]

^swerte mo naman sis! :-) ako mukhang diko makasundo. Iba kasi yung nakagawian ko sa amin kesa sa bahay nila. At ako ay mataray sa paningin nila, tahimik kasi ako at di ako pala kwento kaya feeling ko nasusupladahan sila sa akin, anyway dipa naman kami kasal. Lol

[Kady_14]

You have to reach out too sis, mahal mo bf mo diba? His family comes with the package kapag kinasal na kayo,  you are but one. So lahat ng mahal nya at importante sa kanya dapat matutunan mo na din mahalin at unawain.  At dapat ganun din sila sayo bilang pagrespeto at pagmamahal sa asawa mo. If magka prob pa din, like magka issues with inlaws. Let your husband deal with them.

My MIL and I had our own share of dramas then, bata pa kami nun and ang asawa ko ang super baby nya at hiniling nya kasi ttc siya for so long. So imagine gaano nya kamahal and ka baby ang asawa ko. Hahaha. I had to prove myself na ako ang nagustuhan ng baby nya. Eh di naman din ako domesticated. Lol

Pero ngayon, we're more than ok. When I lived with the the 2nd time. Kapag me bagong maid, akala ako ang anak nya. There are even times then sa kama nya ako natutulog. Hahaha that's how spoiled I was when we lived there. Kaso syempre we had to grow up too and be independent. Pero what I appreciate about my inlaws is anjan lang sila. Hindi ako magdadalawang salita.

Pag wala nga ako maid, she comes here dala angel nya and they clean our house. Oha!  Lol.

[louiesmom]

No. In all fairness to my in-laws they are all nice. They never made me felt unwelcome. When hubby and I had gone shaky, they helped us face that ordeal. Even made me felt they are on my side.

But as a couple who were just starting, it should really be between you and him e. Hindi maiiwasan na nagpakialamanan kayo kapag magkakasama kayo sa house. May mapapansin ka sa kanila, and may mapapansin sila sayo. So to avoid that, bukod kayo dapat. 

[chelle_peachy0524]

if i only got a choice ayoko sana at umuwi na lang ako sa amin kaso mas gusto ng hubby ko dito tumira kami sa kanila. ang dami dami namin at masikip

[friendlyneighbor]

Before kami nagsama ni hubby, I told him na di ako mabubuhay sa bahay na di ako ang reyna. Masarap talagang mamuhay kung ikaw lahat ang may "say " sa bahay..  For financial aspect naman, We already set boundaries kung hanggang saan lang namin kayang tumulong sa mga family namin, kaya nirerespeto din nila desisyon namin.

[margeL]

i lived with my in laws for 1 year.  mahirap talaga yan.  andaming dahilan, where should i begin? haha.  madalas yung maririnig mo comment nila sa ibang tao, then maiisip mo kung [textspeak!] kayang comment naman nila sa akin pagnakatalikod ako.  pati ang room nyo, invaded yan, lalo na't malaki at close ang family nila. buti ngayon we've separated from them na. kaya kayong nagpapamilya pa lang, try hard na bumukod from your inlaws and even from your own family. kase kahit gaano sila kabait at masaya pagsasama nyo, hindi mawawala ang conflict and its very very hard kapag nasira ang magandang relasyon.

[kikaygimikera]

^ tama sinabi ni sis margeL.

As for me, 4 months na kaming nakatira with my MIL. Mabait naman siya pero iba pa din kasi hindi mo bahay. Mahirap gumawa or i-implement ang rules mo because ayaw mong may masabi sayo. Kahit na anong gawin mo, mapapansin at mapapansin ka lalo na pag tapos na nila pagusapan ang mga hot issues sa buhay nila.

Kaya para less issue, iwas ako. Nasa loob ako ng room parati. Pagtinatanong ako ng MIL ko "Sanay ka talagang matulog ano?" Sasabihin ko na lang "Opo." Case Closed!

[lisse]

^BUti sis dina-drop na din ni MIL mo yung mga one-line answers mo. MIL ko makulit. aminado naman siya na chismosa siya bec nature na daw sa work niya (duh!, she's a hairstylist pala).
ma-try nga yan one time. one instance kasi, papalipat ako non sa new house namin, in the middle of a conversation na i-segway niya na yung paglipat ko is somehow related sa familiarity breeds contempt ek-ek. i fell for it, mega explain ako na hindi naman, well actually I lied pero it's not even one of my major reasons for deciding to move out sa house nila. hala, humaba na usapan. next time, I'll just say yes para case closed din.l i wish, kasi i know usisain pa ko non haha!

[Mary20]

I lived with my in-laws for about 4 years and I must say that I was comfortable living with them because they are both nice and cool in-laws. I never felt  awkward to do stuff or to have house rules. My mother in-law was like a real mom to me.

But if you are not comfortable with your in-laws and you think you can buy or rent a house, its good idea to have your own place.

[nicoletta]

Ok nga yan one liners na yan. Magamit nga sa sister in law kong intrimedera and usisera. If I have to see the sister and the wife of my husbands brother everyday, I might go crazy.

[Awesomecakes]

Yay sobrang daming replies. I just want you to know that I'm reading them all.

I have a question though! Was there a time na your hubby isn't ready yet to move out? Pero dumating yun time na you were able to convince him? Is it still possible?
Anong mga sinabi niyo sa kanya para pumayag siya?