would it make a difference if you found out that he wasn't naturally like that

[sacred cow]

let's say you found out that the guy you're dating or going out with wasn't naturally awesome as he is when you met him and when he swept you off your feet. That he actually "learned" or studied on how to be attractive to women (through internet, learning pickup or hiring a date coach) which is why he knew what to do to build attraction when he met you. Would it bother you or change the way you see him?

[blisstacy]

For me, plus yun because I know the guy is trying his best to be romantic para lang maplease ako.
Basta hindi hanggang umpisa lang ah. Yung effort dapat consistent kahit napasagot ka na niya at kayo na.  For me courtship/dating is a test of persistence and personality (i.e. a guy who likes to learn , has humility to ask advice from others and observe what the girl likes and not etc.) 

But some girls don't believe in courtship because of this best foot forward tactic. 

[iseenessie]

Yes it would change the way I see him. I will admire him for it. Because he knew exactly what he wanted, and he worked his ass to get it. Personality overhaul is not an easy thing to do. It means changing everything about yourself that you are used to doing na. It is giving up some of the things you believe in so that you can make improvements on yourself. If a man has worked so hard so he can deserve me, then it is a plus for me. Kasi ako din naman, I am constantly striving to be the kind of woman a guy would deserve. I think it is only right na I be given the same courtesy.

[mooncake and leaves]

I would be upset if he lied about basic but essential information. Or if he  pretended to be kind and a gentleman or pretended to be truly interested in me. That's a deal-breaker. But say, if he stretched his enthusiasm for things I find interesting, I can sympathize with that. Dating naman talaga is a process of breaking out of your shell sometimes and it kind of forces you to reevaluate some things about yourself.  But say he lied about his job or his skills, his background, his beliefs (like neo-Nazi pala siya) or that he’s on parole , etc.—I won’t be able to look past that.

[sacred cow]

thanks for your replies.

what I meant was if the guy was like Steve Carell's character in "Crazy Stupid Love" where he
met a mentor like Ryan Gosling who taught him how to be good with women. not naman yung sleazy
con artist just to get women in bed, although I admit they do exist and I know a number of these guys

[dkbgutierrez]

I'd find him more interesting and cool (as long as he wouldn't play god in a game he mastered).

[sacred cow]

^ ahaha..naalala ko yung isa kong friend, hindi na siya pinapayagan ng gf nya lumabas with the boys without her kasi
alam niya kung gaano kalakas kamandag nung guy in picking up women...and he really was a beast, kaya ansarap demonyohin
man chicks ulit

[sacred cow]

Why not just be yourself? The right woman will find you awesome no matter what. You are just attracting the wrong ones. Believe me it will backfire.

It's ok to be yourself kung may napapala ka, but if you're not getting any by being yourself...then it means you're not doing something right.
Like maybe you have confidence issues, poor body language...siyempre kung gusto mo maka attract ng quality girls
you need to step up din, otherwise you'd end up with girls with serious insecurities and self esteem issues as well.
It's personal development din kasi, hindi lang naman sa pag attract ng babae magagamit but also sa other aspects
of a man's life (social, professional etc.) But you've got to start somewhere, kaya minsan fake it till you make it talaga
sa simula. minsan din kasi may mga ginagawa ang guys na akala nila nakakatulong para magustuhan sila ng babae pero
yun pala counterproductive, some guys know these things from the get go other guys learn it through experience while
some learn it from reading books/reference material

[sacred cow]

Parang ganito lang iyan pre, may nakilalala kang girl. Super ganda ng mukha. Perfect halos ang features. Parang barbie. Yun pala dinaan sa foundation at concealer kaya flawless. Mega contour at highlight. Haba ng eyelashes fake pala. Tangos ng ilong, nose job pala. Pouty lips, collagen pala or lip injection, pati pwet at boobs peke pala. Haba at kapal ng hair, hair extensions lang pala. Kutis gatas, gluta pala. Pag wala lahat iyon ano kaya totoong itsura nung girl?

Wouldn't you feel duped? Parang ganon din iyan saming mga babae.

Ako kasi pinag aralan ko rin mabuti mga style ng guys. Suki ako ng askmen.com at mga website tungkol sa mindset of men. Pero hindi ko ginagamit pang bingwit ng lalake ha. Hehe! Pang defense lang in case some guy wants to play me or get in my pants. Women should always be armed kasi naglipana ang mga manloloko at peke. 

I get your point, except sa case ng sinasabi ko...pwede maging habit or part na talaga ng pagkatao nung guy yung mga traits
na pinag-aralan niya. Like developing confidence, conversation skills, humor, fashion and other alpha male characteristics.

So, para sa'yo ba if he developed himself into becoming a better man primary for the sole purpose of getting girls
would it make any difference to you as compared to someone who was a "natural" ladies man

[sacred cow]

both are not ok with me. guys shouldn't treat us women as prey. na inaalam niyo what we like and want tapos gagamitin niyo iyon para mahulog kame. then you'll drop us as soon as may nakita or nakilala kayong mas ok just because you got game at alam niyong kayang kaya niyo makuha iyong babaeng iyon. (hindi halatang bitter ako. hehe!)

it's a dog eats dog world out there. kaya nga we women find ways to develop ourselves just like you guys do. inaalam din namin ang makapag pa hook sa mga kalalakihan. and we also drop you like hot potatoes just because we can. we learned from the best. (our counterparts.) the male species.

kaya huwag rin kayo mag reklamo kung wala nang quality women, maybe becuase there aren't much quality men around either.

Touché it's a never ending cycle talaga, some guy gets hurt after getting rejected...makes himself attractive
to girls, then drops her after nagsawa na, tapos yung girl na naman na nasaktan...gaganti rin sa kalalakihan.

although "pick up" was really not meant to teach guys to pump and dump women or as you say drop them
like a hot potato pagkatapos makuha ang gusto. Some guys still go by the credo "leave a girl better than when you found her"
I'm sorry to hear your bad experience kaya naging ganun na rin mindset mo, pero diba at least it made us
better people and not see things through rose colored glasses. kumbaga sa matrix, we already took the
red pill and not naive anymore.

[sacred cow]

my mindset? i'm just being realistic. and bakit ka andito sa girl forum? to spy on women diba? to learn stuff about the female species. sa totoo lang hindi ko alam ano ginagawa ng mga lalake dito sa girl forum aside from spying or fishing or both.

nasa information age na tayo. ignorance is a sin. so i'm sure what you guys are doing women are doing too. probably even better. dati it's only the guys who are playing, ngayon guys are being played too and they can't take it.

sorry if i come out angry sa mga kalalakihan. not at all. reading stuff hear on gt makes me generalize. paulit ulit lang din kasi mga topic. "men breaking womens hearts".

OT na ata. in closing, i just want to say na the rules of dating and mating have changed. it's a lot easier to catch a fish but it gets harder to keep one. kahit kasal na naghihiwalay pa. maybe that's what men and women should work on.

hahaha...why do make it out like it's such a bad thing for men to be in a women's forum. aside from fishing or spying, you forgot
to mention trolling..like I sometimes do. If you actually go to other forums, makikita mong mas grabe pa ginagawa
ng mga babae sa lalake...that it would really make you lose faith in things such as marriage because of the hypergamous
traits of women. Men value love, women love value. Men believe that love matters for the sake of it. Women love opportunistically.

women are obviously better at playing guys, if you actually look at history you'd see that a lot of great men went down because of women, from Cleopatra, to Ninon de Lenclos to Salome etc. etc.
Mas marami kayong experience amassed from generation to generation, tsaka mas maaga rin nakikita ng babae ang power nila over men just from the onset of puberty na nakikita nilang they can
get what they want just by a provocative sway of the hips or smile. actually ngayon pa lang humahabol ang lalake because nagkakaroon na ng discourse over the net, e kayong mga babae dati pa nag-uusap usap kung pa'no makakapag-asawa or makakapagpaibig ng men of value.
some women just hate it seeing the tables turned against them, kasi obviously lugi ang babae kapag
marunong mang play yung lalake...pregnancy pa lang.

don't worry hindi ka OT amethyst, I was actually waiting for a reply such as yours...kasi it seems like
you're the first one to reply that knows what I'm talking about and I look forward to reading more of your posts here in GT.

[krnmprl]

i think i will appreciate it more if he changes himself for the sake of turning himself into a person he actually likes. hindi lang dahil he needs to have girls going crazy over him. or because he read that on the internet. sign of insecurity yun. i want a guy who doesn't have validation issues or generally just doesn't give a f*** and is secure about himself.

[bliss15]

i think i will appreciate it more if he changes himself for the sake of turning himself into a person he actually likes. hindi lang dahil he needs to have girls going crazy over him. or because he read that on the internet. sign of insecurity yun. i want a guy who doesn't have validation issues or generally just doesn't give a f*** and is secure about himself.

Pwede naman na yun yung gusto niya maging.  A better person for the girl. =)

[sacred cow]

i want a guy who doesn't have validation issues or generally just doesn't give a f*** and is secure about himself.

^ THIS! It's like us guys saying, we want a girl who does not need to put on make up because she knows she looks good even without it

[jaemi33]

This is an interestign topic. I wish meron girl version rin nito haha

Hmm....I personally don't mind if a guy has changed some of his personality traits if it's for self-improvement. (although, we all can't deny the fact that part of the reason is also for attracting girls ) As long as he doesn't become a total douch*bag right? Make sure na kung ano man yung inomprove mo for yourself is really going to be part of who you are. Hindi puede yung confidence ka lang pag kaharap mo si girl sa initial getting to know stage tapos pag naging kayo super insecure ka pala diba? Ahmm...no-no for me

And come on, girls do this too. I do it too. I just need to make sure na I don't do it only for the reason of attracting guys. I do it because I love improving myself and want to be a better me. I'm not talking only about physical stuff here. Most of the time pa naman na you would attract people who are more like you right? If you want to attarct good quality man/woman, you need to be one too. Again, I'm not saying all of the time this is the case.

 

[huggykaye]

This wouldn't bother me at all, instead, i would be more interested with his next moves.
Who doesn't like being swept off your feet anyway?
As long as it feels sincere, this kind of change is something to appreciate.
I think girls should know when it's already "bola" na lang.
I guess I wouldn't mind if he does the same to the next women he'd meet or if he does it even better.
I'd rather like him for giving such an effort than hate him for not doing anything at all