Author Topic: Would you ever be happy knowing that you stole your guy from somebody else?  (Read 9667 times)

~yufa~

  • Guest
I've been single for the past 10 years because the only guy that I fell in love with cheated on me. I've moved on already but if there's one thing I learned, i know that it's not the feeling that I don't want to go through EVER again.  Thus, being single has been my choice It's probably the reason why I've been also single for so long already. Most guys I am crushing on are taken already so I never bothered to make "paramdam" anymore.

Ever since I wondered bakit may mga ganong babae? I mean, babae din sila. Bakit pa sila manlalandi ng mga lalakeng taken na. Di na nila naisip mararamdaman nung inagawan nila.

Anyway, I've met a new friend. That time, kaka-break din niya sa BF niya for the same reason. Naging close kami kasi nga yun nga pinag-uusapan namin. Why such girls exist? That was just 5 months ago. Iba na situation ngayon. Nanlalandi na siya ng guy na taken. Ang reason niya is "hindi pa naman sila kasal"...and I know she's hoping na magbreak na sila nung girl. I mean I don't know how to react na. Ina-update pa ako nung friend ko uy "niyaya niya ako uminom"...etc. And BTW, all my other friends are very supportive of her. Ako very discreet lang kasi I SUPER disagree. I am not even sure where to place myself here anymore. I know the feeling nga kasi ng maagawan. I mean pare-pareho kaming babae so respeto lang. Yun nga kaya natetempt na akong iask siya "Would you ever be happy knowing that you stole your guy from somebody else?"

Or guys please tell me...ganun ba talaga? Para lang mapunta sayo ang gusto mo?


zarazan

  • Guest
May mga babae lang talagang malandi. And their happiness is stealing other men. It makes them feel "better" than everyone else knowing they were able to steal some guy from another girl. Edi mas lamang sila.

But remember, it takes two to tango. It takes to cheat. And if I liked a guy, who has a girlfriend and whom I befriend tas napapansin ko, nilalandin niya ako pabalik, then it will got me questining. Edi malandi ito. Would I want that in a boyfriend? No. So to answer your question. No.

Break muna sila dapat before he starts flirting with me.

lisse

  • Guest
My answer: no, I don't think I will be happy knowing na nang-agaw ako ng lalaki. Kasi I know that I will have this nagging fear and paranoia na what if maagaw din siya sakin kasi nagpa-agaw siya diba? Mhirap matakot sa sariling mong multo. LIfe is already complicated as it is, kaya ayoko na ng any more complications. Kung pwede namang makipag-date sa mga matitino and single guys why not diba?

aquacharly

  • Guest
When I was young, I wouldn't exactly say inagaw ko.
Kasi, hindi ako  more than friendly with someone I know may GF.
What happens is that -- como interesado sya, he breaks up with his GF first, tapos liligaw.
Pag lumigaw it does not mean ok with me, sige tayo na.  hello.   
Manila is such a small community as they say,  word gets around.  eh kung inagaw mo as in worked at it  and dated him behind his GF's back tapos break sila... well, he becomes fair game to all the other girls pag ikaw naman ang GF.  Plus, your friends will always have you under a microscope vis-a-vis their own BFs.  lol

As for women who make agaw men who are already committed/engaged  or in a live in arrangement -- susko.  I think women like that, lalo na pag ang ginamit na agaw strategy  is the old tired line:  I am pregnant --   what a life of being insecure, of never feeling she measures up to his love.   

Most women, sa pagka alam ko from experiences of family and friends na naagawan ng BF or husband/live in partner  ng iba, the lure is SEX.  Well, as my astute lola says to us male and female apos:  A relationship based on sex never lasts.  So there.

zee87

  • Guest
i would agree to everybody that the answer is NO.
Based on experience eto.
So right now, there's always this fear na he will do the same thing to me dahil nga he left his ex dahil sken (pero sabi niya di nya daw ginawa yun dahil sken kundi para sa kanya dahil break naman kame that time na naghiwalay sila. pero di ba, ganun din un).
So fast forward, nangyari nga sken!
I was sooo ready to end our relationship even though i was pregnant that time, but he begged.
I accepted him.
We continue with our lives.
Pero andun pa rin nga yung iniisip ko na maybe he's still doing it.. pero i stopped investigating.
Sabi ko na lang sa sarili ko, wag lang siya papahuli sken.

pero di ba, girls are supposed to be happy.
pero dahil nga sa mga bagay na ginawa natin in the past, we have to watch out for karma. :(

kaiz

  • Guest
no. but my take is wala namang inagaw or inaagawan sa relationship. kasi diba you don't base yung takbo ng relationship nyo
sa kalandian ng iba. meron at merong temptation eh.

freelancer_babe

  • Guest
Don't blame the girl. Kasalanan rin ng guy kung bakit pumayag siyang ma-tempt.

Unfortunately temptations will always be there. A good husband/BF should be able to resist all temptations.

lonelymiss28

  • Guest
absolutely NOT, a lot of people don't have empathy anymore.

Shiecg

  • Guest

Just think of " paano kung ikaw ang maagawan" ano mararamdaman mo? after the realization, do you think kaya mo un? its a capital N.O!

jmeangeL

  • Guest
you can say that i'm guilty of this, stealing a guy from another girl... go on bash me around... here's the story

fresh grad ako ng makilala si guy sa 1st job ko... nagparamdam sya and my manager actually made a background check on the guy.  walang anak si guy, pero confirmed na may GF in another company and plenty of side-flings.  typical playboy.

i went on several friendly dates with him cause he's funny and intelligent.  pero di nya pa daw kayang iwan ang GF nya.  so there, i moved on.  had a different BF for almost a year that dumped me in the end.

bumalik ako sa same company.  same pa rin si guy.  may GF na iyon pa rin at marami pa rin fling.  ok naman kami since we're friends.  we don't talk about what we had before.  di sya nagpaparamdam or anything.  then one day i saw a picture of him, holding a 1year old baby and felt my heart break.  suddenly, the question that "i'm i too late for him?" came into my mind.

casually, i asked him kung sino ang bata and he joked na anak daw nya.  i asked him kung sino ang mother... dun nya inamin na joke lang

it turned out na ilang beses na syang naki-pag break sa GF nya pero ayaw ni girl.  hindi na nya pinupuntahan si girl pero nagiging depressed ito kaya naaawa sya.  he also tried openly flirting around para ang babae na ang makipag-break sa kanya.  but it won't work.

to cut the story short... he just asked me to marry him instead.  he's not getting any younger na daw at naiinip na sya sa paghihintay for me to grow up.  kinausap nya si girl one last time to say na magpapakasal na sya sa iba.

we're now married for 6yrs and blessed with 2 boys.  i never felt threatened or insecure in our relationship.  i can even say that we're just perfect for each other.  natupad nya ang pangarap nya na makapag-aral ulit at makatapos ng college.  something that his previous GF always objected too.

i agree, masama manlandi or mang-akit ng asawa or kinakasama ng ibang babae... ibang usapan na kapag nagsasama na ang 2 tao, kasal man sila or hindi

pag-aari na talaga ng iba iyon at dapat hands-off ang sino man

ms.holly

  • Guest
When I was young, I wouldn't exactly say inagaw ko.
Kasi, hindi ako  more than friendly with someone I know may GF.
What happens is that -- como interesado sya, he breaks up with his GF first, tapos liligaw.
Pag lumigaw it does not mean ok with me, sige tayo na.  hello.   
Manila is such a small community as they say,  word gets around.  eh kung inagaw mo as in worked at it  and dated him behind his GF's back tapos break sila... well, he becomes fair game to all the other girls pag ikaw naman ang GF.  Plus, your friends will always have you under a microscope vis-a-vis their own BFs.  lol

As for women who make agaw men who are already committed/engaged  or in a live in arrangement -- susko.  I think women like that, lalo na pag ang ginamit na agaw strategy  is the old tired line:  I am pregnant --   what a life of being insecure, of never feeling she measures up to his love.   

Most women, sa pagka alam ko from experiences of family and friends na naagawan ng BF or husband/live in partner  ng iba, the lure is SEX.  Well, as my astute lola says to us male and female apos:  A relationship based on sex never lasts.  So there.

Wonderful insights as usual sis aquacharly and to the rest of our sisses
Here

What if the situation was reverses and it is the single man that steals the committed girl in
A long term relationship albeit the relationship is not perfect since the long time bf has previously cheated on her but due to circumstance and maybe because of the ease and comfort of the long term relationship the gf has not left YET.

What if its the guy that steals the girl do the same sentiments apply? Because i am in that situation right now.

jaemi33

  • Guest
Para sa akin mahirap mag salita ng tapos. IMO, this depends sa tao nag dadala ng situation.

For general social norm, it doesn't really look good, if you stole a guy from somebody else. Gets ko iyon and tama ang mga sisters natin na usually ang end up ng ganitong situation is magiging paranoid karin na baka maagaw siya ng iba kahit na maging kayo, pero again this will depend on that person. Hahayaan mo bang kainin ka ng pag ka paranoid mo? The reality is meron mga taong masaya na ngayon kahit na inagaw nila sa ibang tao yung partner nila. Why? Because they've decided not to live in that guilt. It sucks pag ikaw ang naagawan and I know that sometimes that leaves us with great scar na matatakot na tayo sa mga dadating sa buhay natin and siguro nga ang may kasalanan yung other woman, pero don't you think na it is also our responsibility na mag move on?

If ako yung naagawan - alam ko I'll be mad at the other woman who stole away my man, but at the same time I don't want to live caring about them anymore. Kung talagang kami talaga nung guy hindi siguro dadating sa point na pipiliin niya yung other woman niya. I'll just let it go.
Kung ako yung nangagaw - as of now, I don't think I could do this because I don't want to live my life worrying about when mag eend ang ganitong klaseng relationship.

The bottom line here is that it is still our own decision if we can be happy or not in our lives.

angeleigh

  • Guest
All i can say is Karma is a b****. Babalik at babalik sayo ang ginawa mo.

FOURever

  • Guest
Will you consider the girl na inagaw sayo yung bf mo kung naging sila ng di niya alam na may gf?

Medyo naranasan ko ata to. We're friends ni guy. Niligawan nya ako and naging kami. Nung naging kami na, saka ko nalaman na may gf sya sa cavite pero tagal na nyang di nakikita. So nagalit ako. I asked him if he cannot personally break up with the girl, i will break up with him since technically, ako yung second. He broke up with her. To answer the question, i was not happy about it but became happy when he chose me over her. We were together for a long time. Pero siste, ganun din ginawa nya sakin.

^i don't think mine was a karma though. It was a blessing. Dami palang nakapila na walang sabit. Lol!

aebrbiyc2009

  • Guest
I will never be happy. Sa una siguro oo, syempre gusto mo yung guy e. Pero maiisip mo din na if sayo nangyari e masasaktan ka din.

mooncake and leaves

  • Guest
kung sa akin mangyari, i really don't know. but i think it's unrealistic and a huge waste of time to expect that people will automatically go on a reflective mode and constantly think about how they wronged other people, especially if they are happy in their present reality. they might be forced to confront their guilt someday but there's a huge chance of that not happening.

sarsingkit

  • Guest
^I agree. Hindi naman talaga ko nang-agaw but I had a boyfriend who broke up with his girlfriend to date me. I knew about it but I didn't feel anything. No remorse, no guilt whatsoever. Years after that, I had a boyfriend who kept a fling at the side and I was hurt, definitely. Did I think that maybe I was nakarma? no. So there I realized that maybe kabits do feel that way. They don't feel anything. So why would I waste time wishing and taunting people to feel sorry that they have hurt me. My perfect idea of moving forward is to be indifferent. Walang pakialam at magfocus sa ibang bagay.

baliwsayo

  • Guest
Bakit nga ba agaw ang term? Parang gamit lang ang peg. Lol! Ako, nang-hiram ako once (o di ba parang gamit lang talaga), di ko naman inagaw.. damot nung girl iniskandalo ako kaya sinoli ko na kahit yun guy ayaw pumayag ng nakikipag-break na ko. Hehe.  ;D

Seriously, relationships are between people.. people who has their own minds. So for me, decision pa din yan ng dalawang tao. Hindi sa masaya ako at may naagaw ako pero masaya ako kasi mahal ako ng mahal ko.. for sure dun naka-focus ang utak ko. Survival of the fittest lang naman talaga teh. Sabi nga sa mga restaurant.. don't leave your things unattended. May disclaimer yan sis. Hehe.

skyrimgal

  • Guest
ang takot ko lang sa karma. it would always haunt me knowing na i made another woman cry because of my actions. kahit na sabihing na in love ako kaya ko lang nagawa. in the first place, pwede namang iwasan yung guy kung may nararamdaman kang "spark" between the two of you at alam mo nang he's already taken. out of respect for his partner that i've never met. out of respect for myself. out of respect for all womankind.

jmeangeL

  • Guest
Bakit nga ba agaw ang term? Parang gamit lang ang peg. Lol! Ako, nang-hiram ako once (o di ba parang gamit lang talaga), di ko naman inagaw.. damot nung girl iniskandalo ako kaya sinoli ko na kahit yun guy ayaw pumayag ng nakikipag-break na ko. Hehe.  ;D

Seriously, relationships are between people.. people who has their own minds. So for me, decision pa din yan ng dalawang tao. Hindi sa masaya ako at may naagaw ako pero masaya ako kasi mahal ako ng mahal ko.. for sure dun naka-focus ang utak ko. Survival of the fittest lang naman talaga teh. Sabi nga sa mga restaurant.. don't leave your things unattended. May disclaimer yan sis. Hehe.

nice perspective...

pero seriously, i wish i had dated around when i was young.  dated ha, hindi sleep.  ;D ;D
somehow, i envy those women/ladies who are confident of themselves and are happy to date around

why confine yourself with that "one true love" notion.  meet and mingle.  it would enhance your personality and give you life learning experience

kung di kayo compatible.  end na agad ang relationship and just be friends.  date the next guy.
naagaw ng iba? baka sila ang para sa isa't isa.
see a good looking guy? baka mas bagay kayo kaysa sa kasama nya.


 

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