Si BF tumitingin pa sa ibang girls.. does that mean di pa siya kuntento?

[redhead69]

Well, it all started when he was still courting me last year.. nalaman ko lang recently na may fnflirt siyang ibang girl while courting me, is it normal?

second situation, nung kami na. May inuman sila with his friends, and week after ng inuman nabasa ko na iniinsist niyang sunduin yung isa pang girl(di si girl na nasa unang situation) and di niya sinabi sa akin about it. ( okay naman sa akin na sabihin na sunduin or imeet up para isabay sa inuman, pero he didnt tell me)

third situation, sa twitter niya. May Direct message dun na "Hey ano new number mo? I'm always at Morayta. Wanna meet up? Pwede kita puntahan diyan sa school mo. Just tell me.Madami rin ako kkwento"
Well at this situation, I'm working at morayta (part time) kaya palagi siya nandon. KNOWING na he's waiting for me. Yun pala kncontact niya tong girl (ibang girl nanaman) to meet up. Wanna know he's reason? REASON : " Gusto lang kasi kita ipagmalaki sa kanya, ikwento ka."

To be honest, pwede naman mag twitter sila since knontact naman niya don si girl at dun na lang niya ako ipagmalaki. Ifacebook? I-skype. Bakit meet up pa. And bakit di niya sinabi. A month after niya knontact yung girl tyaka ko pa nalaman.

Fourth situation, looking at facebook of tons of girls.


I dont know if i have a REALLY REALLY BAD JELOUSY PROBLEM. pero, i gave him almost everthing. everything just to make him happy and contented. pero he's reason why is he talking to those girls. " Kelangan ko ng comfort nung kayo pa ng ex mo non''

I told him to wait for me kasi napaka informal if pumayag ako na kami na agad ng wala pang 2 months kami break ni bf.

REASON bakit ako nakipagbreak sa ex ko : Napakairresponsible niya sa lahat ng bagay, naging sugar mommy na rin ako.

And now kami na. Mag oone year na kami and yet im still hurt for the thing he have done. Di ako mapanatag. What if one day may pumatol na talaga sakanyang girl.

Di naman ako panget,di naman ako mataba or sobrang payat. Actually im doing my best to look beautiful para sakanya.

Help me Please.

[sum.mer]

^sis i don't know.. i don't want to give advices kasi baka magulo ko decisions mo..
siguro i'll share na lang what happened with my relationship.
2 years and 4 months na kami ng bf koand the first year we were together he was kinda similar sa bf mo.. he would [textspeak!],chat,and flirt with other girls to the point that it made me feel insecure already and i am starting to loose my self respect. i decided to tell him that if he won't change, i want to break up. he didn't want to. he said he'd change and i gave him a chance but 3 months pa rin na ganun pa rin sya. i waited.. fast forward, ngayon ok kami, happy and nag mature na kami parehas.he has already changed at minsan pjnagtatawanan pa namin ang kalandian at ka-immature-an nya noon. patisya natatawa and he admits that was very childish of him.

what i learned:
-people CAN change
-sometimes we make mistakes because we do not know any better, OR our environment predisposed us to act that way kumbaga sa ugali ng barkada, kinalakihan, sa parents, etc.it doesn't mean we will forever act that way
-if you feel something is wrong, communicate.
-never loose your good values, principles, and self respect just to remain ina relationship

[jaemi33]

sis redhead agree ako sa mga advise na bingay sayo ni sis sum.mer based on her experience but let me also add few points to it.

Sometimes, guys flirt just to assure themselves they got you in their pockets. Men are also insecure creatures. By making you jealous, na-aadd ito sa confidence niya na you really love him. Think of it as a test, so kung ako sayo don't react to everything he does but also make it clear to him his limitations. Kelangan mo ipakita sa kanya na once na nag loko siya and he completely lose your trust, you are ready to walk out (kahit kunwari lang kasi alam ko hindi naman ito madali rin :p) Once, you change your reaction to his behaviour, baka matauhan na yan boyfriend mo. 

Pag hindi mo na talaga kaya yung mga pinag gagawa niya, don't torture yourself to stay in that kind of relationship. Natotorture ka na nga sa boyfriend mo gagawin mo pa sarili mo? Helloo?? Personally, yung reason niya na kelangan niya ng comfort dahil sa past relationship mo, very unreasonable. He should have thought na buti nga you are the kind of girl na marunong iclear out muna yung past relationship before moving to the next one. Goodluck! 

[redhead69]

@Sis sum.mer and sis jaemi33 : Maybe natatakot lang ako na baka mangyari ulit kung paano naging kami. Well bago maging kami i have a boyfriend. 1 year 8 months kami non. well nabuntis ako ng exboyfriend ko na to and 8 months na baby ko non. then namatay baby ko dahil sa depression ko and yung cord niya pumulupot sa neck niya. Depression ko kasi 5 months na kong preggy wala pa siya work and ang cold niya sa akin. I even test him na papalaglag ko kunwari baby ko. pero sinupportahan niya ko don. Sobra akong nasaktan kasi sabi pa niya pwede pa daw naman kmi gumawa ulit. And then sa buong depression ko naapektuhan baby ko. and nawala.. after ko manganak naging cold na ko sa exbf ko na to and siya naman naging super sweet kasi bumalik na ulit katawan ko. I EVEN HAD A JOB AFTER KO MANGANAK. pero siya wala pa rin.My mom and HER SISTER ang gumastos sa panganak ko kasi wala siyang ipon. (take note: naging sugar mommy ako sa ex kong to kasi wala siya work and everyday kami ddate, thats no problem naman pero we promised each other na give and take and..GIRL AKO siguro mahal ko lang talaga si exbf non) that was March last year nung nawala baby ko. Nawala na love ko kay exbf na yon and umabot na ng May, nakikipagbreak na ko. Until i met my bf now. We always talk,comfot me and cheer me up. I find him cute kasi he never had a girlfriend, ever. Virgin rin siya, and we laugh about it kasi nerd siya. and then inamin niya after months of chatting and hanging out that he really likes me and gusto niya ako ligawan. Medyo nahirapan ako non kasi kami pa ni exbf. pero thinking of what he have done to us(me and my baby) so i give it a try. Pinayagan ko manligaw tong si bf sa akin kahit kami pa ni bf. kami pa ni bf kasi ayaw niyang makipagbreak. dahil don.. dumating ang time na gustong gusto ko na si bf kaya sinagot ko siya nung september (which is di ko alam na may iba pa pala siyang fnflirt that time) Pero patago relasyon namin kasi ayaw kumalas ni exbf. umabot ng December, dito totally nakipagbreak na ko kay ex bf. To be honest, umiyak ako nung umiyak sa akin si ex bf kasi eto yung second time na iniyakan niya ako.. Im really confused that time. Maybe i still love my ex bf that time and dont want him to let go. nagpplead siya sa akin na dont leave him.. well i gave him a hug and said ''I gave you almost everything, pero di mo pinahalagaan. I may not be perfect as any girls out there but i gave you a perfect love you really deserve..'' After that time. tyaka lang officially naanounce na kami na ni bf nung Febuary. eto story behind kasabay ng ginagawa ni bf. It really hurts me kasi he once told me that ''he needed comfort kaya siya nakipagusap sa ibang girls dahil di pa officially kami'' Am i not comfortable enough para di niya sabihin sakin lahat non..

mga sis feel free to tell me your advices. i just feel really really sad and confused right now.

[oshiawase]

i have guy friends na tumitingin pa din sa iba kahit may gf na. Iba iba reasons. Pero madalas, out of attraction lang daw. Nasa nature daw kasi ng lalaki ang makaappreciate ng beauty. May mga kaibigan ako na ganun...basta may makitang babae, nirarate agad ng 1-10.

[iamgold]

nako sakin, basta ayoko..parang respeto na lang sakin yun noh..not and not ever in front of me. na tumingan ka sa ibang girl kahit tingin lang..parang nakaka offend yun di ba..normal lang na mapatingin kapag may magandang girl or gwapong lalaki pero wag naman na obvious na obvious..may tendency na mainsecure ang partner..

[jaemi33]

hmmm sis redhead69 ang complicated naman ng situation mo...akala ko kasi break ka na sa ex mo bago naging kayo ng bf mo ngayon...hmm...to tell you the truth I don't know the solution for this talaga. Kayo lang talaga ang makakasolve ng bf mo yan but I could share a story of my friend na similar sayo.

Yung friend ko, she had a 7 years relationship with her ex bf when she met her current bf. Sa kanya lang siguro napagod narin siya sa bf niya and she felt na wala naman talagang nangyayari sa buhay nila. Parang walang pangarap kasi yung ex niya then nameet niya itong mayaman at bata na guy one day. They started hanging out while she was still with her ex, pero eventually naging sila rin katulad mo after nakipag break na siya. Pero honestly, yung current bf niya ngayon, minsan nag dodoubt sa trust niya. Kasi kung baga naka tatak narin sa isip ng bf niya ngayon na nagawa nga ng friend ko makidate sa kanya even though she wasn't official done with her ex, so kaya niya rin gawin iyon sa kanya :p

Please don't get me wrong, I'm not judging you here. It seems like you really went a lot of stuff kaya I know you deserve something better. Pag usapan niyo openly yung nararamdaman mo ngayon. You both need to conquer what happened in the past. Oh kaya kagaya rin ni sis oshiawase, naattract lang iyon. Ganun talaga ang guys 

[eilegna]

1st look, ok lang - it's normal... 2nd look (yung tipong lilingunin pa)... aba teka! 

[prix]

sis ganun naman talaga ang boys mabilis ang mata.. makiramdam ka na lang & kapag nahuli mo sya na sobra na sa limitation nya, kausapin mo na sya & sabihin mo lahat ng gusto mong sabihin para alam nya.. sa amin kasi ni hubby mas mabilis ang mata ko sa kanya.. hehe.. pag may nakita akong maganda ituturo ko pa sa kanya tapos pag minsan nahuhuli ko naman syang nakatingin sa iba, bigla ko na lang syang gugulatin sabay sabi ng "huli ka!" hehe.. tumitingin ka pa sa iba hah!? tapos smile lang ako.. Sabi nga ng mga friends ko ok lang tingnan pero hanggang doon na lang dapat.  

[ragnar_danneskjold]

Guy here. Nung sobrang in-love ako sa ex ko, wala akong napapansin na ibang chicks. Sya lang talaga. I could not remember meeting other women, or getting interested in them nung time na yun. When love faded, dala ng mga arguments, issues, differences na hindi maayos-ayos, ayun, nagstart na akong tumingin sa iba. It happens. I think pag pinakamasaya sya sayo, wala na syang hahanapin pa. Otherwise, maybe he's looking for something else na wala sayo. If napansin mong ganun nga, drop it. Wala kang mapapala, he's a man and he will pursue what he wants.

[sum.mer]

^That was really honest and I agree with you dyan bro.
Yung kapag super saya talaga ng guy, wala sya mapapansin na iba. And true na kapag nagstrike na ang reality..mga away etc.. bigla nawawalan ng idealism at tumitingin/flirt na din sa iba. I think that can also be true for girls din naman. But like I said sis, pwede magbago ang tao... well..pwede rin hindi. Nasa sa inyo yan if it's worth it.

[redhead69]

Kaya right now im doing my best para di siya magsawa sa akin. Pero i think itong si bf talagang love naman niya ako. Kasi everytime i break up with him, nagffreak out siya and umiiyak na ayaw niya ko mawala. Ayaw ko naman siya paiyakin. So sinasabi ko na lang pag umiyak siya ''wag mo na lang alalahanin, siguro ganon talaga ang guys. Nature niyo maattract talaga sa sobrang attractive''

Iniisip ko rin kung ako sa situation niya. Hmm. I dont usually talk to guys na beyond the limit. And i dont meet any guy aside sa kanya and my family members and i dont go out with my friends anymore (kasi ayaw na niya ako pumupunta sa mga night parties) Yeah, wala na rin ako halos social life. Siya-family ko-God.  Actually ang therapy ko ngayon is pag may nakita akong chicks. "Uy chicks oh!" Then sasabihin niya ''nakaturn on nanaman tibo-mode mo haha''

So ginagawa ko na lang joke. Maybe Hahayaan ko muna siya for awhile pero pag lumagpas na sa limit. NAKOOOOOOO! Puputulin ko kinabukasan niya!


Anyway thank you guys for sharing. I've learned alot. maybe tama si sis sum.mer na kami lang makakasolve neto.


Goal :Putulin na lang natin kinabukasan nila pag lumagpas sa limit!

[sum.mer]

^haha nako puputulin talaga? umiiyak sya pag makikipagbreak ka..so baka willing naman sya magbago? baka kasi di lang nya alam how annoying it is for you. i remember my bf he told me before na he does it and akala nya wala naman kasi ako pakialam. anyway, goodluck sis! and sana  :)happy kayo

[redhead69]

^haha nako puputulin talaga? umiiyak sya pag makikipagbreak ka..so baka willing naman sya magbago? baka kasi di lang nya alam how annoying it is for you. i remember my bf he told me before na he does it and akala nya wala naman kasi ako pakialam. anyway, goodluck sis! and sana  :)happy kayo

Siguro ang problem lang sa akin is takot ako masaktan. Takot ako na nagiging masaya na siya sa iba. Takot ako na mas PLEASURABLE yung ma memeet niya or mas pretty or whatever. I'm afraid na mawala siya. Anong best way sis para di ko maisip mga nagawa niya sa akin

[sum.mer]

^sis, siguro positive tayo. dapat siguro muna ok ka with or without him. i mean dapat you know your worth. para kung may gawin sya na hindi maganda, you won't bend lower at isacrifice worth mo just to stay with him. uhm..ayoko sana sabihin pero para kasing immature sya. ok lang tumingin yung mapaglance but actively seeking ang datingng ginagawa nya sakin. bat ganun sis although i think jt can be solved, pero dapat may effort din sya. hindi lagi ibig sabihin na nagsasawa sayo ang partner mo ay may problema na agad sayo, na di ka pretty or what. if he is already making you feel inferior, that can't be good. sis i know naman alam mo na you are lovable and worth it.

[~lovesick~]

first few months namin ni bf, umamin siya na lumandi siya sa iba.. ang masaklap pa doon, nags*x sila sa cam! well, palusot niya nakachat raw niya yung babae nung di pa kami at mali lang niya na pinatuloy niya yun. umabot sa time na binigay niya yung password ng facebook account niy at ym. all i thought na matino na siya dahil binigay niya yun. pero hindi pa natapos ang kalbaryo, dahil sa kakakalikot ko sa accounts niya may ibang babae pa pala siyang nilalandi. pero hindi umabot sa point na naging sila, sabi niya pa lalake lang siya at nagkakamali. nakakawala ng trust yung paulit ulit na ginagawa niya. there are times na naalala ko at natatakot ako na baka maulit pa yun. i'm grateful kasi umabot pa kami ng ganito ka tagal, mag 2 taon na kami ni bf. i told him na palitan niya na yung passwords ng accounts niya, ayaw ko na kumalikot pa at baka may makita pa akong di ko magugustuhan at masasaktan lang ako. i guess, wag ko lang seryosohin ang lahat para di na ako masasaktan pa ulit. pero na realize na rin niya na talagang hihiwalayan ko siya the next time na sasaktan niya ako ng ganun.

[mooncake and leaves]

normal to glance. but to really seek out other girls-- hindi. madali lang umiyak. madali lang mag-freak out when things aren't going your way. mahirap to let go of your pride and to get over yourself and do what's best for the other person, which i'm afraid, based on your post, your bf seems incapable of doing.

honestly, i think you guys have so many issues and parang simula pa lang ng relationship niyo, ang toxic kaagad. maybe take a break from each other? i think you've been through so much in such a short span of time that you're unable to really think straight. it might be best to be alone for awhile.

best of luck

[hisana]

This might not be the most helpful of posts, but just wanna share my POV:

I initially thought that yours was a "simple" case of him ogling at other girls, yun naman pala may flirting involved. Kung ako lang tatanungin sis, ayoko ng ganito, and I believe that harmless flirting in an oxymoron. I've always said that I can put up with a lot of things in a relationship, but cheating/landian is not one of them. Hell, if you want to be with other girls, then go be with those other girls and don't let me waste my time on you.

nako sakin, basta ayoko..parang respeto na lang sakin yun noh..not and not ever in front of me. na tumingan ka sa ibang girl kahit tingin lang..parang nakaka offend yun di ba..normal lang na mapatingin kapag may magandang girl or gwapong lalaki pero wag naman na obvious na obvious..may tendency na mainsecure ang partner..

Exactly.

[sum.mer]

^agree with you sis hisana

to TS, Kamusta na kayo sis? ikaw how are you?

[redhead69]

^agree with you sis hisana

to TS, Kamusta na kayo sis? ikaw how are you?

Hi sis sum.mer,nag open up ako sakanya so far na gets naman niya point ko. Nagpromise nasiya na hindi na daw niya yun gagawin.

Pero takot ako na one daw maulit ulit kasi sa ibang relsyon umuulit pa din. Maybe i should decide na iwan  if mangyari ulit to gaya ng sinabi ni sis hisana