When the Love fades... :(

[yummy05]

Masaya namn kami before, but nung nagwork sya sa sales nagbago na ang lahat.. - ayaw nya ng tawag ng tawag ako, even pag tinetxt ko sya di sya agad nagrereply, late narin sya umuwi, may mga ka [textspeak!] din syang girls na minsan mama, mami etc. ang tawagan nila.. Sabi nya ganun lang daw yun.. madalas din sya uminom kaya late madalas uwi nya,.. everything's changed... I feel it.. Kaya madalas na din ang away namin, sinabi nya saken sinasakal ko sya which is hindi naman, gusto ko lang magtxt o tumawag man lang sya.. Last time nag away kami, sinaktan nya ko, and the hurt still remained... Actually hindi lang once nya ko sinaktan, everytime na may big fight kami,,. hanggang ngayon cold treatment pa din kami sa isa't isa.. Di sya magtxt o tumawag habang nasa work sya.. Nasasaktan ako... Sabi nya walang iba, and napatunayan ko naman na walang iba.. But why he sudden changed? Hindi na sya yung dati kong minahal na mabait... Parang monster na sya sa paningin ko minsan.. We decided to separate pero bigla ko syang pinigil because of our son na 6months palang,.. Bigla akong naawa sa anak ko.. I know kinalaki ng ulo nya ang pagpigil ko, ok na ako dahil nagbati na kami.. Pero iba na sya. Ang lamig lamig nya saken.. Parang nawawalan na din ako ng gana.. Dumalas ang pag aaway namin.. Should i let go? Or hold on? Ang hirap kasi ilang beses na din kami muntik maghiwalay and i know maybe this is our last chance na.. gusto ko ng makipaghiwalay pero pag naiisip ko anak namin naaawa ako, aside from that SAHM ako, wala din akong enough money to shoulder all finances... Pag naghiwalay kami, i know di nya susuportahan anak nya... Ang sakit sakit sa dibdib na binabale wala nya ko.. Ang sakit isipin na nagbago na lahat..

[girl24]

hi sis! same boat tayo, so *hugs* for both of us. ako naman, nahuli ko na meron talaga iba though magkasama pa rin kami sa bahay, i feel he is mentally and emotionally so far away. ang pakiramdam ko pa nga "nandidiri" na siya sa akin. syempre siguro si kabit sexy, bata, hindi pa nagkaka anak... i hate why i allow him to make me feel so insignificant kahit na siya ang nagkasala sa akin at sa aming anak.

as of now, i just pray and ask God for strength. just this weekend, i was really crying to God na ambigat bigat ng krus na binigay niya pero ang kasabihan wala daw ibibigay ang Diyos na hindi natin kaya pero nabibigatan na ako, nahihirapan sana tulungan ako ni Lord, mapagaan ang pasan pasan ko...

[gracita13]

awww parang nadudurog ang puso ko habang binabasa mga sissies im not yet married but soon to be this coming May.iniisip ko pa lang na baka mangyare saken yan waaaah ayokoooo! sobrang spoiled ako sa h2b ko at kung alagaan parang baby na halos isubo pati kakainin ko kaya pag nangyare samen yan naku talaga naman,.,haaay.. anyways sissies just pray pray pray ask God for His guidance & strength,be more closer to Him.tama si sis girl24 walang ibibigay si God na hindi naten makakaya,.,whenever i feel so down i always read this bible verse.
 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.Jeremiah 29:11

anyways,para maiba try to watch HALL PASS & FIREPROOF mga sissies para yan sa mga married po
*hugs*

[Noylabmay]

Sis TS ilang years na kayo?

Baka naman dumadaan lang both of you sa stage na mahirap for couples....
talk to him yung masinsinan pero yung hindi ka galit or hindi sha mainit....
show him na there's no better place than beside you

I examine mo rin sis baka naman pag uwi nya galing work, nag start ka na mag ratatat
kaya madalas kayo mag away?
Sis narining ko lang to ha.....
mostly ng naguguidance na students me family problem,yung mga usually nag aaway ang parents or nasa stage ng hiwalayan kawawa ang bata...
Pray hard sis HE will lead you.

[quinone]

sis yummy05, alam mo nung nagwo-work ako hindi ako mahilig magreply sa text ni bf (now hubby). kahit nung naging mag-asawa na kami, kung hindi niya sasabihin na "magreply ka" sa text, di ako sasagot. di rin ako tumatawag sa bahay namin kahit may landline sa desk ko sa office...kasi i am working, andun yung focus ko. kahit lunch time, i don't call or text him, instead natutulog ako.

are you a stay at home mom? if you are, what do you do sa spare time mo? nasabi na ito before sa mga ibang threads, wag natin paikutin ang buhay natin sa hubby or bf natin.

if you miss hubby, pwede naman kasi na mag-spend ka ng quality time with him pag uwi niya. halimbawa habang dinner, magpakwento ko ano yung mga ginawa niya that day sa office, ikuwento niya mga friends & clients niya.

baka adjustment period lang between the two of you kasi first time niya mag-work? although mali talaga na saktan ka niya...naging makulit ka ba? for me once or twice a week na paglabas to drink with friends is ok para sa pamilyado na, pero not everyday.

sa experience ko sa office, ang mga sales people talaga ang hihilig gumimik. chaka may mga tinatawag talaga sa office na "mommy" mga mother-figures or mga supervisors nila.

kailangan sabay kayo mag-grow ng hubby mo. kung dati lagi kayo magkasama/magkausap or umiikot ang mundo sa isa't-isa, tapos now nagwowork siya, mag-adjust ka rin. find something new for yourself also.

[yummy05]

hi sis! same boat tayo, so *hugs* for both of us. ako naman, nahuli ko na meron talaga iba though magkasama pa rin kami sa bahay, i feel he is mentally and emotionally so far away. ang pakiramdam ko pa nga "nandidiri" na siya sa akin. syempre siguro si kabit sexy, bata, hindi pa nagkaka anak... i hate why i allow him to make me feel so insignificant kahit na siya ang nagkasala sa akin at sa aming anak.

as of now, i just pray and ask God for strength. just this weekend, i was really crying to God na ambigat bigat ng krus na binigay niya pero ang kasabihan wala daw ibibigay ang Diyos na hindi natin kaya pero nabibigatan na ako, nahihirapan sana tulungan ako ni Lord, mapagaan ang pasan pasan ko...

*super hug din sis* i adore you for being so strong despite na nagloko hubby mo.. siguro kung ako ikaw, nag empake na ako and lumayas... i'll pray for you also na ma enlighten hubby mo sa mga ginagawa nya sayo.. I feel you are a good wife to your husband the mere fact lang tinanggap mo parin sya kahit continous pa din ang pagloloko nya.. Thanks sis for sharing siguro nagkukulang ako sa pag pray kay God..

[yummy05]

Sis TS ilang years na kayo?

Baka naman dumadaan lang both of you sa stage na mahirap for couples....
talk to him yung masinsinan pero yung hindi ka galit or hindi sha mainit....
show him na there's no better place than beside you

I examine mo rin sis baka naman pag uwi nya galing work, nag start ka na mag ratatat
kaya madalas kayo mag away?
Sis narining ko lang to ha.....
mostly ng naguguidance na students me family problem,yung mga usually nag aaway ang parents or nasa stage ng hiwalayan kawawa ang bata...
Pray hard sis HE will lead you.

Sis 3yrs. Na kami and we have a son which is 6months now.. madami kasing changes sis, i see it and i feel it.. May nagbago sa kanya pero di ko ma-pinpoint kung [textspeak!].. Siguro best term lang yumabang hubby ko.. madami din nakapansin na medyo sarcastic na sya magsalita even sa oldies.. yes sis dumalas ang pag nag ko sa kanya admitted ako dun kasi dumalas ang labas nya and pag uwi nya ng late.. weekly umiinom sya.. Thanks sis.. Right now, nawawalan ako ng gana sa kanya, i don't see myself growing old with him.. Feeling ko di na kami aabot sa ganun if he continous doing things na pinag aawayan namin..

[yummy05]

sis yummy05, alam mo nung nagwo-work ako hindi ako mahilig magreply sa text ni bf (now hubby). kahit nung naging mag-asawa na kami, kung hindi niya sasabihin na "magreply ka" sa text, di ako sasagot. di rin ako tumatawag sa bahay namin kahit may landline sa desk ko sa office...kasi i am working, andun yung focus ko. kahit lunch time, i don't call or text him, instead natutulog ako.

are you a stay at home mom? if you are, what do you do sa spare time mo? nasabi na ito before sa mga ibang threads, wag natin paikutin ang buhay natin sa hubby or bf natin.

if you miss hubby, pwede naman kasi na mag-spend ka ng quality time with him pag uwi niya. halimbawa habang dinner, magpakwento ko ano yung mga ginawa niya that day sa office, ikuwento niya mga friends & clients niya.

baka adjustment period lang between the two of you kasi first time niya mag-work? although mali talaga na saktan ka niya...naging makulit ka ba? for me once or twice a week na paglabas to drink with friends is ok para sa pamilyado na, pero not everyday.

sa experience ko sa office, ang mga sales people talaga ang hihilig gumimik. chaka may mga tinatawag talaga sa office na "mommy" mga mother-figures or mga supervisors nila.

kailangan sabay kayo mag-grow ng hubby mo. kung dati lagi kayo magkasama/magkausap or umiikot ang mundo sa isa't-isa, tapos now nagwowork siya, mag-adjust ka rin. find something new for yourself also.

Yes sis I'm a stay at home.. And mag isa lang ako sa house with my baby, ako lahat gumagawa ng household, kaya I can say na wala akong spare time.. minsan nahihirapan ako dahil sabay sabay ang ginagawa ko, magluto, maglaba, mag alaga even maglinis ng bote, pero sis I'm not complaining.. I'm happy doing those things kahit mahirap.. What makes me angry sa husband ko, at times, napapansin ko buhay binata sya.. before, madalas sya mgtxt even calls, now, wala syang pakialam, matatapos ang gabi na wala manlang ako matatanggap na [textspeak!]/call, to think na naka unli sya and all those friends of him, masipag sya magtxt at tumawag pero pagdating saken balewala ako.. Hot temper sya sis, and my tendency sya manakit even in his past rlationship... lately sinaktan nya ako kasi ayaw ko ibigay yung susi ng car ko, which is akin talaga yung car sya lang gumagamit kaya feeling nya sa kanya.. About sis sa tinatawag nyang "mami" kinda firting ang [textspeak!] messaging nila, may [textspeak!] pa sya na "sasayawan mo ba ako ng gwiyomi and sabay ka na malunch" kaya nag init ulo ko.. Sabi nya natural lang daw sa sales ang ganun but I don't buy that idea, dahil minsan half meant lahat.. Thanks sis, i know sa kanya kasi umikot mundo ko and I don't know paano maghanap ng ibang paglilibangan since 24/7 nasa bahay lang ako..i tried na ifocus lahat sa baby ko but may times pa din na hinahanap ko yung dating sya...

[k_heart]

^Ay sad naman yan sis! 3 years is such a short time. Almost honeymoon stage pa yan. 9 years
na kaming kasal ni hubby pero almost same pa rin naman kami sa pagtrato sa isa't isa.But we have major fights also pero
naayos naman namin. Syempre, we can see changes sa isa't isa as individuals, pwedeng mga ugaling
nadevelop or mga talagang ugaling dating nakatago pero ngayon ay hindi na kami nahihiyang ipakita.
kAsi syempre pag bago pa lang kayo, best foot forward lang lagi.
Befor ba kayo magpakasal sis ay working girl ka at naging sahm lang nung nagpakasal kayo?
may mga guys, not everybody ha, na they find pala na boring wives nila pag stay at home.then
if you don't keep yourself busy, talagang si hubby lang lagi ang maiisip mo.
kahit naman ako, pag nag aaway kami or masama loob ko sa kanya, gusto ko din hamunin ng hiwalayan.
pero syempre malakas ang loob ko kasi financially independent ako at kayo kung buhayin yung 3 kids
namin with or without him at syempre alam nya yun.


Feeling ko, baka pwede pa yan maayos sa magandang usapan or start working again. i think nabored na sya
agad?

[yummy05]

^Ay sad naman yan sis! 3 years is such a short time. Almost honeymoon stage pa yan. 9 years
na kaming kasal ni hubby pero almost same pa rin naman kami sa pagtrato sa isa't isa.But we have major fights also pero
naayos naman namin. Syempre, we can see changes sa isa't isa as individuals, pwedeng mga ugaling
nadevelop or mga talagang ugaling dating nakatago pero ngayon ay hindi na kami nahihiyang ipakita.
kAsi syempre pag bago pa lang kayo, best foot forward lang lagi.
Befor ba kayo magpakasal sis ay working girl ka at naging sahm lang nung nagpakasal kayo?
may mga guys, not everybody ha, na they find pala na boring wives nila pag stay at home.then
if you don't keep yourself busy, talagang si hubby lang lagi ang maiisip mo.
kahit naman ako, pag nag aaway kami or masama loob ko sa kanya, gusto ko din hamunin ng hiwalayan.
pero syempre malakas ang loob ko kasi financially independent ako at kayo kung buhayin yung 3 kids
namin with or without him at syempre alam nya yun.


Feeling ko, baka pwede pa yan maayos sa magandang usapan or start working again. i think nabored na sya
agad?

Yes sis before nagwowork ako.. I think ugali nya na talaga yun ngayon ko lang nakita.. sa previous ex nya ang reason mabarkada sya masyado kaya sila naghiwalay.. Pero dati sinabi nya sken na nagbago na sya and ngayon nakikita ko na bumabalik..

[sassyrosel]

i believe in power of prayer sis. if you're already praying, pray harder. Maybe your just going through a trial... maybe you can also try to talk to him, to know if both of you still willing to work-it-out. mahirap, but you need to listen attentively, accept your mistakes (if any), and compromise. if he says "no", then maybe you need to let go...

[ReservoirDogs]

Hi sis, when you posted that "sinaktan" ka ng husband mo, what do you mean by this? Physically, as in he hit you?  Honestly, it's a huge deal breaker for me.  If my husband hits me, I'll leave, asap.  Hitting a woman is NOT excusable, even if wives nag their husbands.   

I suggest that you guys undergo counseling; no harm in trying, and your husband needs to see that you guys need it.  Set your boundaries. Don't let your husband treat you like crap, because he will think that that is OK.

[girl24]

sis yummy05, sis reservoirdogs is correct, don't suffer with the physical abuse... i know, easy said than done. i am certainly no expert in the "not letting anyone abuse me" part pero siguro start by letting your family know or even your in laws na lang siguro muna because magagalit for sure ang parents mo. start by telling his parents that he hits you baka they can knock (literally and physically) some sense into him... keep us updated...

[gab54]

to the TS, tutal pinigilan mo narin si hubby, i guess kahit nawawalan ka narin ng gana, deep inside u wanna fight parin for ur marriage... tutal natry mo na manga away, cold treatment, etc, may i suggest u try a diff approach naman? kung ok lang sayo, pls read "fascinating womanhood", there's a thread here discussing this. tutal stay at home mom ka, u have time to read. try mo lang sis. madali mag give up, u can do it now, or maybe next year? or maybe few years from now? basta fight muna habang kaya pa...

[gorgeous gal]

hi sis. same question with the other sisses, does your husband hurt you physically?  kasi like sis reservoirdogs, its a deal breaker for me. he hit u once, he will hit u again and again and again. u dont need to stay in a relationship na ganyan.

try to look for ways to be independent. wag mong hayaang nakadepende ka lang sa hubby mo in all aspect (financially, emotionally, etc.).  you have a child already, so you need to be strong for your child. 

[yummy05]

i believe in power of prayer sis. if you're already praying, pray harder. Maybe your just going through a trial... maybe you can also try to talk to him, to know if both of you still willing to work-it-out. mahirap, but you need to listen attentively, accept your mistakes (if any), and compromise. if he says "no", then maybe you need to let go...

Thanks sis, we talked pero ako palagi nya sinisisi, ako lang kelangan magbago, nagger daw ako, selosa and madumi mag isip... Sis di naman ako ganito kung wala syang nagawa dati,.. yes, admittedly nawala ang trust ko sa kanya kasi may ginawa na sya nuon.. Kaya traumatic saken everytime nakakabasa ako ng messages coming from other girls... about being a nagger, I nag him kasi super late na ang uwi nya, even sunday pumapasok sya..

[yummy05]

Hi sis, when you posted that "sinaktan" ka ng husband mo, what do you mean by this? Physically, as in he hit you?  Honestly, it's a huge deal breaker for me.  If my husband hits me, I'll leave, asap.  Hitting a woman is NOT excusable, even if wives nag their husbands.   

I suggest that you guys undergo counseling; no harm in trying, and your husband needs to see that you guys need it.  Set your boundaries. Don't let your husband treat you like crap, because he will think that that is OK.

sis everytime na nagkaka big fight kami nanakit sya, sinasakal nya ako, drina drag nya ko sa floor, hahawakan nya ako ng mahigpit then tinutulak ng malakas, pinitsarahan din nya ko dati, nasampal na nya ko ng malakas, last time hinampas nya sa mukha ko yung binder and sinakal nya ang mukha then brag me in the floor.. I know I'm still in the denial stage na di sya nanakit.. Iniisip ko minsan, di naman nya ako sinusuntok but minsan naiiyak ako kasi i know he already violated my right... everytime na galit sya lagi nya ko tinatakot na sige sasaktan talaga kita... :,( i'm only 4'9 and he's 5'9 and masculine kaya sobrang nabibigatan ako sa kamay nya saken.. Inopen ko na sa family ko na gusto ko na ng separation but they insisted na kawawa ang anak namin, and trials lang yan.. Lahat daw dumadaan sa ganyan, kesyo nag aadjust pa lang kami.. Pero never ko sinabi na nananakit asawa ko kasi alam ko ngangawa ako ng malakas at lalaki ang gulo.. Which ayoko ng gulo gusto ko kung magkakahiwalay kami,. yung maayos...

[yummy05]

sis yummy05, sis reservoirdogs is correct, don't suffer with the physical abuse... i know, easy said than done. i am certainly no expert in the "not letting anyone abuse me" part pero siguro start by letting your family know or even your in laws na lang siguro muna because magagalit for sure ang parents mo. start by telling his parents that he hits you baka they can knock (literally and physically) some sense into him... keep us updated...

Sis broken family sila and I already told sa mother nya na nanakit anak nya, naiyak lang mom nya since takot din sya sa anak nya and matanda na mom nya wala ng magagawa.. Di ko masabi sa family ko dahil ayoko kaawaan nila ako.. And ang point ko it only happens kapag magkaaway lang kami but deep within I know ang t*nga ko..

[yummy05]

to the TS, tutal pinigilan mo narin si hubby, i guess kahit nawawalan ka narin ng gana, deep inside u wanna fight parin for ur marriage... tutal natry mo na manga away, cold treatment, etc, may i suggest u try a diff approach naman? kung ok lang sayo, pls read "fascinating womanhood", there's a thread here discussing this. tutal stay at home mom ka, u have time to read. try mo lang sis. madali mag give up, u can do it now, or maybe next year? or maybe few years from now? basta fight muna habang kaya pa...

Thanks sis... gusto ko talaga sana maghold on pa para sana anak namin, masyado pang baby.. But deep inside nakakapagod na din, minsan talaga gusto ko na sya igive up... Pero I know di ko pa kaya...thanks sis i'll try to read that.. Siguro dadarating din yung time na masasabi ko na enough na..

[yummy05]

hi sis. same question with the other sisses, does your husband hurt you physically?  kasi like sis reservoirdogs, its a deal breaker for me. he hit u once, he will hit u again and again and again. u dont need to stay in a relationship na ganyan.

try to look for ways to be independent. wag mong hayaang nakadepende ka lang sa hubby mo in all aspect (financially, emotionally, etc.).  you have a child already, so you need to be strong for your child.

Thanks sis, right now iniiwasan ko na din isipan pa sya, di kasi ako makapag work or sideline kasi mag isa lang ako sa bahay namin, ako lahat.. Hirap din ako.. Kahit sya inaasikaso ko pa.. siguro aantayin ko na mag 1yr. Na anak ko by that time makakagalaw narin ako on my own.. Sa ngayon kasi ang hirap, honestly, hindi ako magkandaugaga sa dami ng gawain sa bahay, morning palang tambak na gawain ko..