BF na hindi sweet

[Girltalker2]

I was just wondering kung may iba pang guys out there na hindi sweet sa gf nila, bf ko kasi ganyan  nakakatampo lang talaga wala eh, though super appreciated ko yung pagsundo sundo nya sakin pero aminin natin mga girls na sometimes we look for something sweet na heart melting talaga, like surprises. Hay nakaktampo lang kasi kaya most of the time eh ako ang nagsusuprise sa kanya, kaso di ko naman maramdaman yung appreciation nya by the way mag 4yrs na kami,

depende ata sa couples. nadadaan naman sa pag-uusap. pero kung magtatampo ka lang, na tipong you want him to do certain things that he is uncomfortable with, baka mahirap.

in my case, in looking for a partner, I like to find someone who is romantic and expressive. pero this is just me. I just think that the probability of success in the relationship is higher kung pareho kaming romantic. kasi what happens after being together, getting married?  dapat somehow BOTH parties should try to keep the love and fire alive, para naman hindi boring. 

I only had 1 bf/hubby pero separated nako now.  And this time, I know what I want and para sakin, kung hindi romantic, ayoko na aksayahin ang panahon ko kasi hindi na naman ako bata. 

But if you are still young, exploratory palang, you are still unsure what you are looking for, it is always good to try and talk things out, especially if you are already committed but finding some flaws. Mag-usap kayo what can work and cannot work, give and take lang naman iyan.

[schumine]

Awww! Ang galing mo naman sis ... magaya nga yan hehe!

Hihi sis. try mo dali, tapos share mo dito what happen. I remember pa I asked him before, pano siya kiligin, sabi niya pag umiihi daw. Pero nung i surprise ko siya, sobrang kinikilig daw siya at kung pwede lang ba daw mag blush ang negro. hahaha..

[chicafabulosa]

Share ko lang mga sis ha, I have an Uncle na "emotionless". No reaction at all. Di sya masabi ng I love you or touchy sa family nya. I think nature na nya kasi yun. Meron talaga na ganun mga sis. Di marunong mag express ng feelings. But my Uncle will fight for his family, patayan kung patayan daw. Pero yun nga my Aunt just got used to it na rin.

Kasi may mga boys na nahihiya maging showy for their feelings. And lets face it most of the boys ayaw nila na masasabihan na emotional. I think some of them think na if they are emotional, some guys view them as weaklings kaya they tend to just hide their feelings.

I think you just need to get used to it na lang. As long as if kayo lang 2, sana naman sweet sya. Ayos na yun. Just try to understand and learn to live with it. Isa yan sa flaws ng partners nyo na dapat tanggapin.

[SimpleBeauty08]

Hi sis! It's been a while since the last time I used my account here.. well anyway before I answer your question, I will ask you one first if you don't mind... ^^,

1. Ever since ba naging kayo ni bf, ganyan na talaga siya? Hindi sweet? O lately lang nging ganyan?

>> If ganyan si bf ever since, meaning personality na talaga yan at mahihirapan ka ng baguhin pa, but if hindi sya talaga ganyan, ask yourself why hindi na sweet. baka may 3rd party or nawawalan na ng gana since ang tagal nio na...


I have a bf for 4 years as well and he's been dense all through-out so sanay na ako. Most of the time, ako talaga ngeeffort. I kept on complaining sa kawalan niya ng sweetness sa katawan on our 1st two years but eventually, natanggap ko na din na ganun tlaga siya and it does not mean na he doesn't love me as much as Ido. Sometimes, men aren't really showy. They have other ways of showing their affection...maybe your guy happens to be like that too...

Sabi nga ng bf ko before when I asked him why he's like that, sabi niya, mas okay na yung ganung klaseng bf but faithful and honest, unlike other guys na sweet nga sa gf's nila pero sumesegway naman sa iba.

Honestly. as a girl, I also long for sweetness, those things na nakakakilig sakin but all these years, I've learnt how to adjust and accept na whatever I do, I can't change him anymore so I just try to appreciate those small things na gnagawa nia... instead na magreklamo nlng ako at mangaway palagi that may lead to misunderstanding, or worse, break-up. T_T

Lastly, don't expect too much, you might be disappointed. Just go with the flow. But if you think na you are not happy anymore, leave na lang rather than stay sa relationship na di ka na masaya. It's not good din kasi if you impose to your bf or tell him to do things na di natural, awkward lang...  but then if you think na makakaya mong tanggapin na ganyan talaga si bf I think mas okay yun..

I hope somehow I've helped. Thanks! Good luck sa relationship nio ni bf... 

[onlygirl]

Honestly. as a girl, I also long for sweetness, those things na nakakakilig sakin but all these years, I've learnt how to adjust and accept na whatever I do, I can't change him anymore so I just try to appreciate those small things na gnagawa nia... instead na magreklamo nlng ako at mangaway palagi that may lead to misunderstanding, or worse, break-up. T_T

Lastly, don't expect too much, you might be disappointed. Just go with the flow. But if you think na you are not happy anymore, leave na lang rather than stay sa relationship na di ka na masaya. It's not good din kasi if you impose to your bf or tell him to do things na di natural, awkward lang...  but then if you think na makakaya mong tanggapin na ganyan talaga si bf I think mas okay yun..

Correct ka sis!  after all, there is always adjustments in relationship if you really want to stay.  Every one just need to learn the language of love of their partner.  Minsan sa partner mo sweet na yung action nya pero sa yo wala pang dating.

[hilbillywillie]

Guytalker here, and this is the Martian side of me talking.

Anong hindi sweet ang pinagsasabi niyo?  I will jump into bed with you at a flick of a finger.  Hindi pa ba sweet iyon?  Girls talaga are so difficult to understand!

Gets nyo na?

[bear_touch]

I do believe ma lahat naman ay pwedeng pag usapan ng maayos esp kung relationship na ang naka stake

[Girltalker2]

Sabi nga ng bf ko before when I asked him why he's like that, sabi niya, mas okay na yung ganung klaseng bf but faithful and honest, unlike other guys na sweet nga sa gf's nila pero sumesegway naman sa iba.

agree. mas ok naman talaga ang bf na hindi nagloloko.  pero bilang babae, I would still prefer to be with someone who is faithful AND sweet.

when I was younger, ang mali ko is I did not entertain guys na ayaw ko at yung first guy na nagustuhan ko lang ang inentertain ko. thus, I was not able to go through the "dating" phase whereby I get to think through ano bang mga characteristics ang hanap ko sa partner, etc.

ito opinion ko lang naman, marami kasi satin, since bata pa tayo, sometimes we are not sure what we want sa partners natin.  then once naging bf na natin sila, magrereklamo tayo na hindi sila sweet. eh hindi naman talaga sweet sa umpisa d b? hehe  Anyway, ang point ko lang, if given a chance, you should meet as much as you could (of course yung pasok sa basic criteria) and see anong personalities ang ayaw/gusto ninyo, para sa gayon, once hahanap na kayo ng partner sa buhay, you know that he is really the right one for you. 

Gaya nitong thread na ito, puede hindi sweet si bf.  Kung ok lang sayo, ok, good for you. Pero pag hindi, laging magiging frustration iyan. And minsan, lalo na pag matagal na nagsasama, it creates some barrier between the 2 of you kung lagi mong ipupuntirya iyan, eh sa hindi sya talaga ganun, pero hanap ng girl ang ganun. so paano?

[jaymejorrol]

Hi sis! It's been a while since the last time I used my account here.. well anyway before I answer your question, I will ask you one first if you don't mind... ^^,

1. Ever since ba naging kayo ni bf, ganyan na talaga siya? Hindi sweet? O lately lang nging ganyan?

>> If ganyan si bf ever since, meaning personality na talaga yan at mahihirapan ka ng baguhin pa, but if hindi sya talaga ganyan, ask yourself why hindi na sweet. baka may 3rd party or nawawalan na ng gana since ang tagal nio na...

ito rin naisip ko.. naunahan ako ni sis.. hehe.. well mostly naman kasi talaga ganito ang pwedeng dahilan.. you could both talk about it naman.. mas ok na yung naguusap kayo kesa dedmahan lang.. later on baka niloloko ka na pala kaya hindi na sweet

[RoadrunnerXCX]

naku yan din problem ko ke hubby...pero in terms of texting naman hindi naman siya pumapalya pag di kami magkasama

siya hindi mabigay ng flowers suprises dates..iyong ganoon...pero pag dating sa bahay since wala kaming HH/Yaya

siya naglalaba, saka hugas ng mga pinggan help niya ako sa mga gawain bahay..

ok naman kaso minsan siyempre like mga girls iyong may kilig factor thing...hai

panalo ka na sa ganyang guy sis lalo na kapag naka tuluyan mo. malaking bagay kapag married na kayo na marunong sa household chores ang guy kahit hindi sya sweet

[Girltalker2]

@akosilg - mga Pinoyy ganyan daw, mas sweet pag bf palang, pag mag asawa na, nababawasan. Pero may ibang lahi, like the caucasians, sabi ng friend ko, mas sweet daw pag magbf na kayo at mas lalo pa daw sweet pag mag asawa na kayo.

@princess_chill, tama si sis redrack, since asawa mo na naman sya, just focus on his positive traits. Wala ka naman nang choice but to make it work. Another alternative is to talk to him din.

@red rack 1 - ang sweetness kasi minsan hindi natural sa tao. Kaya bilang babae, since hanap hanapin natin, mas mabuti nang makahanap ng partner na sweet right from the start. Kaso ang hirap nga lang ma identify kasi lahat sila lagi best foot forward pag pumoporma pa. Pero sakin rule of thumb ko lang, pag Pinoy, mas malaking chance hindi sweet pag kayo na (again, hindi naman lahat pero karamihan).

[RoadrunnerXCX]

actually ang sweetness yata nasa upbringing din yan. to be honest, hindi din ako sweet na sweet occasionally lang hehe pag nasa mood. e kasi naman both of my parents hindi din sweet paano naman ako magiging sweet. pero si hubby uber sweet minsan nga nafi-feel ko hinahanap nya. sinasabi ko na lang kahit hindi ako sweet. am extremely and blindly loyal.

[junepets]

my hubby is not sweet as well...
as in... no text everyday...

walang 'nag lunch ka na?'

text lang namin is 'love, pauwi na ko... may papabili ka?'...

ganyan lang...

pero... once na sumpungin ng pagkasweet... kilig talaga..

mag9 years na kami.. pero 3x pa lang nya ko nabigyan flowers...
and super kilig when he did that.

correct yun sinabi ng isang sis natin 'don't expect..' para hindi ma frustrate..

[kharenlouisse]

Si hubby ko ganyan din, hindi siya sweet and inexpressive. Pero ganyan kami nagtagal, dahil hindi pangteleserye ang peg nang relationship namin kaya hindi kami nagkakasawaan, bilang lang ang away namin,..

May mga ganyang guy talaga, si hubby kasi introvert and suplado, ewan ko pero dun ako nainlove sa ganong personality niya para kasing special ako kasi bibihira lang ang kinakausap niya.

Nakakatawa pa nga kasi 1time I ask him to give me flower,chocolate or bear since valentines naman, sabi niya wala ako aasahan so ako naman mega tampo , pero nagulat ako paguwi niya sa house namin may dala siyang swatch na relo na gustong gusto ko yung tinuro ko sa mall.

Para kaming si Zhi Shu at Xiang Qin lang nang it started with a kiss hehe  

[lady_avoidant]

minsan nagtataka ako sa bf ko.. minsan kasi e sweet siya tsaka minsan e hindi..last night , may street party event sa amin.. siksikan talaga... eto yun.. before  kami bumaba ni bf ng sasakyan e ok pa kami pero nung palakad na  sa may maraming tao e hindi siya nag initiate ng holding hands kaya waiting mode ako para e holding hands niya ako to no avail. kaya ang ginawa ko e hindi ko nalang  siya nilalapitan at sinasabayan sa paglalakad instead dun nalang ako nakikisabay sa   isang friend ko na girl--  dinaan ko sa pakikipagkwentuhan to divert yung nararamdamang tampo ko sa kanya... anyways, nung naghanap kami ng upuan for the group e nauna siyang umupo.. ayun di na ako tumabi sa kanya .. kami ni friend ang magkatabi .. later on.. di na niya ako pinapansin.. hmmp.. anlabas e siya pa ang nagtatampo e kung tutuusin ako ang dapat magtampo kasi parang iniwan iwan nalang niya ako .. buti kasama ko si friend para may makausap...hayy...

[palamig]

^saklap naman nyan sis. hirap talaga pag ang naging bf eh wala ka sweet sweet sa katawan

[simang]

Sweetness is relative. One might find a gesture romantic, while the other might find it corny. (eventhough most romantic gestures are corny, lol).

I guess what we boys and girls have to learn is the different love languages. People express love differently, and while most girls equate love to grand gestures like a dance mob for a proposal or something, not all guys find that necessary to express their emotions. If there's anything that I learned in making a relationship work, it's that I have to treat my man like a man. Minsan kase girls treat their boyfriends like how they treat their girl friends -- it just won't work. Men are wired differently. If girls think roses/good morning texts/holding hands are romantic, how about your guy having awesome sex with you? How about your guy willing to go down on you just to pleasure you? How about your guy actually being with you? Aren't those 'romantic' enough?

Don't look for something that isn't there. Unless a grand romantic gesture is the most significant thing in your life, then by all means break up with your non-expressive bf and find someone who's 'better' in your standards.

I have been with my guy for more than a year now, and isang beses nya lang ako binigyan ng rose, isang piraso lang on my birthday last year. But the efforts he makes to see me everytime (he lives an hour away from my place), to get close to my sisters, to make sure i'm accepted by his family, to send me good morning selfies everyday, to make sure i'm having awesome sex everytime, to make out with me passionately everytime, to hold my hands, to make corny jokes so I grin a little, to tickle me so i laugh my lungs out, and seriously I can go on and on and on.. That just shows how much I am appreciated. He doesn't even say he loves me everyday, but he makes me feel it not through flowers, not through flowery words, not through kilig, but through his little innate quirks which makes me appreciate him all the more.

I just don't like how girls are so blinded by chic flicks. Urgh.

[iwannabeasupermodel]

My bf is not sweet too. Eh ako pa naman sobrang sweet. Little by litte nahahawaan ko na siya ng sweet gestures ko. Though it's really frustrating. Sometimes i feel unappreciated tuloy.

[wildorchid]

I have this kind of boyfriend. Hindi nag iiloveyou o i miss you o kumusta o kung ano ano pa. No flowers, gifts, etc even on birthdays and other occasions. No greetings during annivs/ monthsary. No random calls just to know my whereabouts. Nababaduyan lang kaya ayaw ng ganung affection. He spends time with me. I understand him naman and generally, im a happy girl friend.

[creativehunk]

palitan ng sweet, thoughtful at caring na guy!