does hating your ex means you haven't moved on?

[break_free]

If I may add sis, delete mo nalang siya sa list mo kasi hindi healthy na everytime makikita mo posts niya eh nakaka ramdam ka ng bad feeling. Pag may nagtanong kung bakit mo dinelete, pakelam ba nila, may magagawa ba sila? Ayun tc sis.

[mooncake and leaves]

no. i hated an ex for a while. he didnt cheat on me but he was a major dbag i think more than anything, i hated myself for putting up with him and wasting my time (and money). so definitely not a case of still being in love with someone. i read somewhere that that's an actual condition. tipong you get obsessed with the anger because it has become so familiar, so comforting, addictive even. so keep the anger in check and agree with those who said to cut ties, all forms of communication and pray. or whatever you need to do to find peace. recognize that you're better than someone's online stalker.

[jaymejorrol]

depende yan sa kung paano ka magreact kung naaalala mo ex mo.
wala naman kasi talagang 'kinalimutan ko na sya'.. di totoo yun.. never mo makakalimutan yung situation na ngbreakup kayo ng taong once na minahal mo..

so, kapag naalala mo si ex tapos bigla ka nabadtrip, naiinis, nangigigil, naging mataray, nag-emote.. malamang di ka pa nakapag-move on..

pero kung maalala mo man sya, pero for you parang wala lang.. past is past.. nasa isip mo nalang yung nangyari.. wala ka na violent reactions.. i think naka move on ka na

[carla27]

I just broke up with my 6 years bf . I caught him adding again sa fb yung girl na nag cause ng 1 st break up namin 2years ago. Sa 1st break up all hatred anger remorse I felt towards him but after awhile we got back together, but this time iba as soon as I saw what he did napa-mura lang ako sa bbm ko sa kanya sabay sabi its over, pero ngayon wala ako galit maramdaman ewan ko ba.. Naging numb ata, or umabot na sa point na sobra na.. Natauhan na lang ata ko. As what Ive said sa friends ko bigla natangal ang helmet :/

[Len0523]

Nagagalit ka lang naman kung ikaw ang iniwan at niloko or pinagpalit e. Kahit naman siguro nakalmoved ka na, pero pag naisip mo na NILOKO ka, magagalit at magagalit ka pa rin.
Not anger exactly to EX, but what he did.
Parang malabo naman kase talaga ba makalimutan yun mga pasts e. Unless magkaamnesia.
hihi

[jaymejorrol]

Parang malabo naman kase talaga ba makalimutan yun mga pasts e. Unless magkaamnesia.
hihi

yup.. hindi totoo na kinalimutan na natin ang nakaraan.. saying 'kinalimutan ko na sya' is just another defense mechanism para ipakita natin na nakamove-on na tayo.. never mo makakalimutan yung someone na nakagawa ng malaking pagkakamali or nanakit sayo.. kapag binangit ang name ni ex syempre maiisip mo sya.. then sasabihin mo lang, 'kinalimutan ko na sya'.. or pabiro na.. 'sinu sya?' but the reality is.. naisip mo sya.. and never mo sya nakalimutan..

[Len0523]

What if my bagong partner na? Say inlove na inlove ka na dito.
Malabo pa rin makalimutan at hindi maalala.
The fact na naging part sya ng daily routine mo before.
nakamoved on pero di nakalimot?

[jaymejorrol]

What if my bagong partner na? Say inlove na inlove ka na dito.
Malabo pa rin makalimutan at hindi maalala.
The fact na naging part sya ng daily routine mo before.
nakamoved on pero di nakalimot?

what i mean po is.. hindi natin pwede sabihing 'kinalimutan ko na sya/yon'.. kasi kahit tumanda na tayo, may asawa't anak na, once na nabanggit si ex.. hindi natin makakalimutan and maaalala talaga natin yung ginawa nya satin.. but since naka move-on na tayo..bina-balewala nalang natin.. unless talagang matanda na tayo at nagiging makakalimutin na..

[mimiku]

The opposite of love is not hate but it’s APATHY.
 
Test yourself – if you remember your ex and suddenly you feel an outburst of hate or even tidbits of resentment, that only means you have not completely moved on yet. However if you feel nonchalant, indifferent, apathetic or uninterested even if you see him lying on the road naked, that means you don’t have any feelings for him anymore.
 
It’s true what they say, it’s not a question of forgetting, it’s a question whether you’ll be bothered by a mere memory of him. You cannot forget someone you loved, that’s really impossible (unless of course you get an amnesia), it’s the same thing about not being able to erase your history with him. Nonetheless, it has something to do with acceptance that whatever has transpired between the two of you, it no longer controls or even elicits any sentimental feelings particularly negative emotions from your heart. If you still get affected, that means you still harbor affection.
 
Time always heals the pain.
 
Been there. Done that.
 
My ex cheated on me and I was devastated. I pursued him up to the ends of the earth and got so traumatized when he left me. I was full of anger back then. I hated him to the core. However, when I learned to value myself, the healing came so naturally. Now, I don’t even remember how I loved him and most especially why I hated him that much. There are times, he crosses my mind and still gets a bit curious on how he is doing now, but I don’t hate him anymore, and true, I’m just grateful on how he used to love me. I finally accepted that everything happens for a reason, and we’re just not meant to be.

Now, he really is just somebody that I used to know.

[Filipinasadhart]

move on na!  dumidistansya lang ... umiiwas  lang....

[pinkk]

Lessons learned, been there,been that. I completely agree that hating as an emotional defense helps you to move on and never ever turn back again.

[jaymejorrol]

Lessons learned, been there,been that. I completely agree that hating as an emotional defense helps you to move on and never ever turn back again.

may point to sis

[Uridessey]

I agree with you girls. Like me, akala ko forever na lang akong maghahabol sa kanya. Before, I can't live a day without hearing from him. E dumating yung time na sobrang binabalewala nya na ko, magtetext lang if he feels like texting me, minsan papatayan pa ko ng phone. I just hate it na ginaganun ako. I found the courage to pull myself together and nagsimula akong lumayo sa kanya. Tomorrow, one week na akong di kumocontact sa kanya. Masakit lang sakin na nalimutan ko sarili during the process na hinabol ko sya. Nasaktan ko sya, nasaktan din nya ko. We're quits. I don't want to play his game anymore. Pagod na kong pagdaanan lahat ng yun. It's time na mag focus naman ako sa sarili ko. Ayoko lang ng itetext nya ko or memessage ako sa fb when alam nya naman na humihingi ako ng space.

[khayzee]

on topic.. for me, i know i haved moved on pag i dont feel any hatred towards that person anymore.

[plumpolka]

Hey guys! Im the TS and ngayon, wala na ako hatred na naf-feel sa kanya. normal na lang din. and pag nakikita kami with college friends, casual na lang din. I guess, hating your ex helped me moved on completely... So now, I can answer my own question. Based on my personal experience, hating my ex doesn't really mean I haven't moved on yet but it also doesn't mean na naka-move on na. I was at the stage of moving on, yung parang I'm there but not yet completely there. wala lang. feel ko lang sagutin ang sarili kong tanong. hahahahaha

[gab54]

^good for you! 

[jaymejorrol]

Hey guys! Im the TS and ngayon, wala na ako hatred na naf-feel sa kanya. normal na lang din. and pag nakikita kami with college friends, casual na lang din. I guess, hating your ex helped me moved on completely... So now, I can answer my own question. Based on my personal experience, hating my ex doesn't really mean I haven't moved on yet but it also doesn't mean na naka-move on na. I was at the stage of moving on, yung parang I'm there but not yet completely there. wala lang. feel ko lang sagutin ang sarili kong tanong. hahahahaha

mag 4 months narin pala sis.. well, see you 'there'! hehe.. bata ka pa.. marami pang mas deserving na darating sayo.. masasabi mong naka-move on kana kapag naisip mo si ex pero hindi kana ganun ka-affected and na-bobother.. parang wala na lang.. he's just your past..

[ravena]

yes, because i did not have my revenge..

[FOURever]

What if hindi dumaan naman sa hatred after breakup? How can we say na nakamove on na? May tendency ba na after a year saka lang susumpungin ng galit towards to what happened? May ganun ba? I am a little worried because di ako nakaranas ng hatred towards him after ng breakup namin.. But i admit naman, naaalala ko pa mga ginawa nya pero wala lang? Nangyari na eh? But minsan, sa sobrang frustrate ko na wala akong maramdamang galit sa kanya, sinasabi ko na lang na naiinis ako sa kanya? Parang ang nangyayari, defense mechanism ko naman sa feeling na dapat naramdaman ko after breakup. Is there a tendecy na after few months saka ko lang mararamdaman yung hatred? Or is it possible to move on without that feeling?

[angeleigh]

I dont hate them, I hated myself for awhile though. For not being smart enough then.
Wasted so much time.