first time mom, how to deal with baby

[Nhetskii]

sis baka makatulong...

http://www.streetdirectory.com/travel_guide/202017/kids_and_teens/when_your_child_prefers_the_nanny_over_you.html

[m_lim]

^thanks sis!

ang hirap talaga but wala naman ako magawa. hindi ko pwede pilitin ang baby.

 starting next week, isasama ko nalang muna everyday sa office. tingnan ko kung ano mangyari

[khriseeee]

^try having alone time with your baby that's aside from sleeping. Like playtime, bathtime, etc. Even if you bring her to the office, will the yaya be primarily taking care of her while you work? Things will stay the same lang. Try finding time to bond with your daughter without the yaya.

For most babies, sleep/nap time is not something they like so they fight it. Might also be why your baby is fighting against you if she associates you with sleep/nap time lang. My daughter gets upset when the yaya comes into her room at night while we're playing because she knows the yaya will make her sleep na

[m_lim]

^thanks for the tip sis! try ko nga magka playtime kami before sleeping.

[twelvth_goddess]

^Sis, I know how you feel. Don't feel depressed, ang mga kids talaga get attached to the person na nakakagisnan nila from their sleep. That's what my pedia said. I suggest you set an activity with your child na ikaw lang ang gagawa talaga. Samin ng daughter ko, yung pagpaligo talaga ako ang gumagawa. My husband and I are both working and we don't have a yaya now so kelangan talaga magpangabot kame para may magbabantay sa anak namin. May routine kame that we follow, as in who does which with our daughter.

[cutemama]

^same tayo sis, ako nagset talaga ko ng rules kay hubby na kami lang talagang dalawa ang magpapaligo kay baby, never si yaya. Proud ako sa hubby ko kahit 1st time dad siya marunong na siyang magpaligo ng baby, siya kasi nagpapaligo pag nasa work ako, hapon pa kasi work niya. Well medyo malaki kasi si baby kaya hindi nakakatakot paliguan. Maganda kasi pag hands on ka talaga kasi bonding moment niyo rin yun ni baby.

Pagdating ko sa bahay from work, kukunin ko na agad si baby kay yaya, magpplay na kami niyan. 13 months pa lang kasi siya now pero love na love niya ko hihi. . . Pag dumadating ako sa bahay tuwang tuwa na siya. Nagseselos na nga si hubby kasi mas love daw ako ni baby.
Hay iba talaga pag may baby, nakakapagod pero masaya.

[stacies83221]

^thanks sis!

ang hirap talaga but wala naman ako magawa. hindi ko pwede pilitin ang baby.

 starting next week, isasama ko nalang muna everyday sa office. tingnan ko kung ano mangyari

I agree with sis twelfth goddess. Sis does your baby have a sleeping ritual? Try asking her yaya among ginagawa nya to make your LO nap/sleep. Baka yun ang gusto nya kaya?

[cutemama]

Oo nga sis try to hug her and sing a lullabye or nursery rhymes and also giver her milk habang kinakantahan mo siya and be sure to turn off the tv and dim light dapat. Yan ginagawa ko kay baby nakakatulog naman siya agad.

[m_lim]

ang baby ko kasi, never nagmilk pag matutulog, laging kailangan pilitin. as in kailangan aaliwin /distract mo siya with cellphone /ipad or toys (nung mas maliit pa siya) tsaka mo ipapasok ang milk sa bibig niya habang distracted siya.

i know, masama ang cellphone and ipad pero hindi talaga siya mag mmilk pag hindi distracted. as in kaya niya maghapon walang gatas pag di mo pilitin.

ang gising niya usually, 7am or 9am. pag 7am, naabutan pa niya ako. pero wala narin ako time asikasuhin siya kasi mag ready na rin ako pumasok. so derecho na siya kay yaya para mag milk, palit ng diaper.

then mga 9 or 10am, papaliguan na siya tapos matutulog na ulit around 11am. gising yan mga 3pm then dadating na ako from office around 6PM.

hmm.. wala namang special na ginagawa si yaya para matulog si baby. basta pag nakikita na naantok na, kakargahin lang sandali then kusa lang matutulog.

kami naman pag after dinner, aakyat na kami then maliligo lang ako tapos play kami - either coloring books/ slide or bahay bahayan. then sleep na.

maghapon kasi sila magkasama ni yaya. samantalang kami, 6PM til mga 10pm lang pag tulog niya

[khriseeee]

^That's a lot of time na together narin so make the most of it

My issue now is my daughter is attached to me but I am due to give birth in November. Of course I will not have as much time or attention for her by then. one of our friends suggested na hubby get more involved in caring for my daughter. My daughter isn't close to my hubby at all as he doesn't really spend a lot of time with her, as in the most my hubby can look after her is 5 minutes before both of them start looking for me! So for the past few weeks I've been forcing hubby to spend time alone with our daughter - they have their own bonding activities already such as making her milk together at night then playing in her bedroom for 30mins-1 hour before bedtime. I've noticed an improvement, she looks for him na when she wakes up and follows him around.

[Priceless]

sis m_lim, I know how you feel! Sakit talaga sa puso pag nakikita ko how he holds onto yaya! In my case, at least I am assured that yaya loves my son and treats my son like her own child so I know he's in safe hands while I am away.

I work long hours din and I was just telling hubby the other night how lousy I feel kasi most of the time, si yaya ang kasama ni baby. But what he said helps a lot - our kid will always have someone na he will be spending a lot of time with, hindi lang si yaya or kami. There will come a time na friends naman or classmates, etc. For now, even though si yaya ang madalas nyang kasama, as long as our child knows na kami ang parents nya and that we love him and we spend a lot of time with him, that's all we can do (and all we should do). Plus hubby says I shouldn't lose all of my time and my time alone with hubby to look after the baby. We still need to have a life too.

Anyway, what I try to do para ma-affirm sa anak ko na kami ang parents nya, is to ensure that yaya always talks about me and my hubby kapag kausap nya ang son ko. Our photos are all over the house, I call him up (kahit na hindi pa sya nakakapagsalita) through Yaya's phone at least once a day, and before I leave and when I get home, I make sure na ako (or kami ng hubby ko) ang kalaro nya (without yaya around). I give him a bath, bring him to his bedroom at night and give him his milk at night. Even though si yaya ang natutulog sa nursery beside his cot, at least I get to spend the last of the waking hours with him. I suggest you also find out what your daughter likes best and see how you can incorporate "you" or "you & hubby & her" in it. Para matutunan nya kung ano ang family unit and sino yung nasa family unit nya. For example, if your daughter likes ipad games and such, why not go through your photo album and show her photos of you and her? or you and her and your hubby? or other members of the family (and ask her kung sino yung mga yun)... My baby likes to push the button of my phone to turn it on, and as a wall paper, I've got a photo of him and his daddy. I ask him to push the button and kiss daddy's picture - which he does! Even though he doesn't really "kiss" yet, he presses his nose against my phone's screen (which I now have to disinfect a lot) and also other photos of me/baby/hubby/family members. In the future I'm considering leaving a tablet at home, which yaya can operate so I can do facetime/skype with my baby whenever I'm in the office or traveling.

At least once a quarter we travel for a few days or a couple of weeks without yaya around so my hubby and I become the primary care givers during this period. And then every sunday, yaya gets a day off so I  take care of baby from morning till night until yaya gets back from her day off.

[m_lim]

^thanks for this sis!

alam ko naman na ako parin ang nanay pero hindi ko mapigilan masaktan. (this is the truth na wala akong mapagsabihan!)

[LeallianFaye]

Thank God nakita ko tong thread ang laking tulong na malamang hindi ako nagiisa sa ganitong sitwasyon. My baby is just 1 week old and ramdam ko na yung hirap since si hubby nasa ibang bansa although madami akong kasama sa bahay na family members kahit inaalok nila na hawakan muna si baby para makakain ako ayoko ibigay si baby, praning na ata ako. Haha! Pag dating ng madaling araw dun nagsisimula ang kalbaryo ko sabi ng Mga sissies dito lack of sleep lang talaga pero iniisip ko nalang twing naffrustrate na ko is hindi naman ako pinahirapan ni baby nung nasa tiyan ko siya at nung pinanganak ko siya, kaya pag may times na iyak siya ng iyak at di ko alam kahit anong pagtumbling at pag bertikal ko walang epek dun talaga ako naawa sakanya, pero tsinatsaga ko nalang yun mga puyat nights kasi nga once lang sila babies.

Goodluck satin mga mommies!

[daveigh]

^ Sis, yan din ang pagkakamali ko nuon i do not grab the opportunity to rest, siguro maternal instinct natin takot tayo ipahawak sa iba babies natin. Pero kelangan mo yan so kung sa umaga, you can rest 3-4hrs kunin mo yan, laking tulong yan laban sa puyat.

[stacies83221]

sis LeallianFaye, hang in there. My LO is turning 5 months na rin and I was exactly on your shoes, though I have my hubby with me, we don´t have any helper. Sabayan mo ng tulog si baby and if OC ka dati when it comes to cleaning and organising, bring it a couple of notches down. The important thing is now is you´re there for your baby and it will not be long before she will crawl, walk and run away from you. I cuddled and spent a lot of time with my baby. I told my hubby na we should keep things simple and easy and tone down the chores/errands.

The first few months talaga yung mapupuyat ka, but eventually your baby will get into her sleep-wake routine and makaka- adjust din ikaw.

[LeallianFaye]

Sis daveigh and stacies83221 thank you mga sis! Problema sakin mga sis hindi na ko makatulog ulit pag umaga na, kahit tulog si baby sa hapon ako naman kahit tinatry ko matulog hindi na tallaga ako makatulog, nakakahiga naman ako kahit papaano. Sa gabi sinasabayan ko si baby matulog although alerto parin ako kasi takot ako sa SIDS naman. Okay lang mga sis, kakayanin to para naman sa mga babies natin tong puyat. Nakakapawi naman ng pagod pag nakikita mong ngumingiti si baby paminsan. Tama ka sis, mabilis ang panahon kaya susulitin ko na to before I start working again kas for sure mamimiss ko rin ang puyat nights kahit paminsan gusto ko nang sumirko.

[+arte20+]

^Pareho tayo sis ang hirap matulog sa umaga at hapon. Hindi ko din yan magawa kahit tulog si baby maghapon. Nung minsan natulog talaga ako nagkulong kami ni baby sa kwarto kasi ba naman 8am na natulog kaya kahit 2 hrs umidlip ako.

Ang hirap makipagdeal sa babies kasi hindi naman sila nakakapagsalita kung anong gusto nila o may masakit ba sa kanila. At minsan nauubos na din pasensya ko sympre first time ko at dala na din ng pagod at puyat. Pero pag nakikita ko baby ko iyak ng iyak at hindi ko alam gagawin para patahanin, naaawa na din ako at binubuhat ko na lang habang yakap. Ayun, sumasaya pa din ako kahit nakakapagod at puyat.

[dreamweaver83]

Pa-join ako mga sis. Ang hirap maging first time mom and siguro maging mom in general. Nabburnout din ako minsan caring for baby 24/7 and lalo na pag umiiyak tapos di ko mapatahan kahit anong gawin ko. Bilib ako sa mga moms na walang household help kasi ngayon pa lang di ko na maimagine, paano pa kaya if I have to do laundry, take care of my husband, cook meals, etc. We just got a yaya recently to help a bit with diaper changes, baby's laundry, tidying up, tapos yung existing household help naman yung nagluluto sa house so di ko na yun pinoproblema pero nakakaoverwhelm pa rin minsan with the breastfeeding. I bought nga rin cloth diapers and it's a good thing one-size sila so di ko pa kailangan gamitin right away pero that's one more thing to worry about later. Syempre kahit di ako mismo yung maglalaba, kailangan ko rin tutukan yung yaya namin kasi maraming bawal like fabric softener, tapos kailangan iprep yung diapers and stuff. I'm just taking it one day at a time. I have to start building my milk stash na rin so I can start doing other things and for when I start working again so yun pa besides having to feed every time our baby's hungry. Sobrang sarap rin lang ng feeling to be holding our baby and sometimes just looking at her makes me feel better. Iniisip ko minsan ienjoy ko na lang habang maliit pa siya kasi di ko na to mababalikan. Iba rin talaga yung love ng parent sa child/ren nila. I feel so lucky to be able to experience this despite all the hardships.

[vain_kixie]

Mga sis at what age do babies sleep on their own without rocking/patting/dancing them to sleep? As in yung ibaba mo lang sila sa crib and they sleep already without any form of intervention like giving a bottle or pacifier?

[candyjersey]

First time mom din ako. Ang hirap pag puyat ka tapos gutom tapos kailangan mo i-breastfeed si baby. May kasama naman kami sa bahay so siya taga laba at taga linis ng bahay. Pero pag dating kay baby ako lang. And gusto ko rin naman na ako yung mag-aalaga kay baby kahit na puyat ako. Kasi minsan lang sya maging baby..and sinusulit ko dahil pag balik ko sa work mababawasan yung time na ako ang mag-aalaga. Kaya ko tiisin kung puyat..pero pag gutom ako grabe nakakalambot talaga. Haha!

Ang sarap ng feeling pag pinagmamasdan mo si baby.. Now I know bakit ganito mga nanay sa anak.. Ganito pala talaga. At totoo pala talaga na pag mom ka na ayaw mo madapuan ng ng kung ano ang anak mo kahit langaw pa yan.