Being married to a foreigner...

[23and14]

hi ladies,

care to share you experiences (positive or negative) on being married to a foreigner?  i'm newly wed to an english man.  i was out of the country for 7 years then me and my brithish husband decided to relocate here in the Philippines 2 months ago. 

i’m happy of course kaso dami kong adjustments and difficulties. kala nila it’s all about glamour. hay naku…

[little_princess]

hi! i am a newlywed and he is english as well. we are located here in manila and he has been living here for the past 3 years. wala pa kaming 1 month married and we are temporarily living in his bachelor pad before we move to our condo unit next year. it has been good so far but one thing i notice is that mas OC mga pinoy than them and hindi uso maids hehe

[Priceless]

^ I would say that in my case, they're sweeter and malambing - without the theatrics, the drama, the arte. They're very straightforward, and if they like or hate something, they're prepared to say outright - wala nang patumpik tumpik or mind games. They expect you to be honest as well and be prepared for honesty.

[little_princess]

^ i would have to agree. my hubby is sweet in the most simple but kilig way. they will gaze into your eyes and say they love you and mean it. they are not grand or will throw you a big and staged dinner for 2 but they have their own ways. they are also frank and will be straightforward with you and they expect you to be the same.

one thing, they are used to doing the household chores. i grew up like a "princess" and we are not having a maid so we divided the chores in such a way he does the cleaning and laundry. i do the driving, cooking and grocery. i don't think you can get that from a pinoy.

[23and14]

nice to know you little_princess.  hope sometime we can have a couples dinner date. hehe.  we were based in singapore before we relocated back pinas 2 months ago and even though life was easier there, my husband loves the philippine close family ties culture so we think for now we will stay longer here sa pinas muna.

agree to what others said na they are very sweet but at the same time he is very straightforward. na minsan nami-misinterpret na snub or rude. but once he gets comfortable to the person he was newly introduced, he is super wacko.

question, you partner loves filipino food? sya kasi very rare sya kumakain so if we eat at home there will always be a separate menu for him.  it's not a concern though pero i just wish he can eat sinigang or adobo or paksw with me.  for a change naman sa usual pasta, steak or fish & chips...

but he loves phil chips like chippy, vcut and boy bawang. haha! 

[frankikay]

count me in mga sisses. wala na akong maishare sinabi nyo na lahat.

regarding food naman, hindi masyado mapili si hubby.ayaw lang nya talaga yung mga foods natin na strong ang amoy like dried fish, paksiw etc. maasikaso sila noh tapos hindi tamad.tutulong talaga sa mga gawaing bahay kahit na galing sila sa trabaho, nakakainlove lalo

[mlee]

I'm married to a Latin-American, five years going. In terms of ugali, very straight forward siya, walang arte or drama. Also very responsible and reliable. He takes work seriously pero very laid back sa bahay. I think depende sa upbrining ng guy. My husband is family oriented and grew up in a big family so there's always a reunion, a party or someone visiting or staying over our place.

I almost never cook Filipino food medyo hindi siya fan of the flavors. In terms naman sa gawaing bahay, mostly ako gumagawa. Surprised at ako after 2 years napansin ko ako pag gawaing bahay, hindi siya tumutulong. It must come from his upbringing siguro kasi in my observation, from his mother down to all his sisters, they all do housework and the men work. ganun. frustrating sometimes lalo na kapag medyo overwhelemed ako.

Pero in terms of marriage, the love, the relationship, it's a partnership. Very level headed siya and open for discussions. Very honest and straightforward talaga.

Give and take lang talaga when it comes to marriage lalo na kapag magkaiba ng lahi.

[23and14]

i remeber nung bago pa lang kami dito pinas he won't do the "mano po" gesture and ang tawag nya sa mama ko is madam or boss. but after 2 months of staying here, he loves it so baka magtagal kami dito for few more months.  he knows how to say oo, hindi, hay naku at tumahimik ka. lol.

though life outside pinas was easier for us, for now masaya sya dito kasi he knows im with my family.

[Starlust]

Hubby is French and we lived in the Philippines for a couple of years before getting  married recently.

The major thing he disliked in the Philippines is the food I hate Filipino food too so buti nalang magkasundo kami dun so we eat at non-Filipino restaurants mostly. Well the only exception is grilled seafood.

As the others said, they're really used to being independent so household chores & the like are not a problem. We've learned to split tasks between those I can tolerate - ex. I like to clean the bathroom but hate washing dishes so he does that hehe. Like little_princess, super di ako sanay kasi I grew up so spoiled with servants! He jokes that I grew up in a bubble.

[little_princess]

my hubby is 50-50 with filipino food. he likes sisig, adobo, etc but he doesn't like bagoong, anything fatty, exotic seafood and some other things.

we divide the chores based on what i can do which is steaming the clothes, cooking and driving. he's a proud house husband when he's here kasi

[eischied_21]

Ako naman takot to marry a foreigner maybe because of culture differences.

[little_princess]

^ there are lots pero nasa inyo naman how you adjust. all marriages have adjustments.

[jeune]

Hubs is American but he grew up overseas and mingled with different nationalities where Filipino is one of them. I don't have a problem feeding him lol. He eats almost anything including Filipino dishes, he even eats ampalaya con carne to my surprise and actually craves for it!:D He's a sweet guy, loving, caring, dependable, a good provider, spoils me and of course handsome!

We hardly fight, mostly it's because of my tantrums. We compliment each other, we work as a team although I do majority of the household chores. I feel like its my way of showing gratitude since I'm currently not working. But to sum it up, I don't have that much differences and I'm very thankful for that.

[Shadow Angel]

Wala akong nakarelation foreigner... (Ano ginagawa ko sa thread na ito)... Nacurious lang ako i like the idea na straigh foward sila and you know how they feel... Ang hirap ng sobrang tahimik pagnag aaway kayo puro mind reading buti sana kung agree sya sa lahat ng iniisip mo about sa thinking nila... Ginagawa akong laging manghuhula... Kakainis na ang ganun noh...well ganito na talaga ata ang mga pinoy men alam mo yun hindi masalita at nakakaloka ng iniip kung ano iniisip nya.. Pero kahit ganun yun mahal ko yun... hehe... Pero parang gusto ko rin ng foreigner katatakot lang baka mamaga sadist na pala o psycho na pala makikilala ko alam kong hindi lahat pero may mga foreigner na iba talaga ang thinking...

[itcha123]

well ako pinoy din hubby ko pero my youngest sister had a Kano hubby, ok naman daw sila mas takot nga si Kano na pauwin ang mag-ina niya dito sa Pilipinas dahil baka daw hindi na bumalik sa US hehe., now my other sister had a boyfriend na Kano rin  mas maganda pa nga raw ugali ng foreigner eh, pero siguro swertihan din lang.  And one thing for sure, maalaga at maasikaso kasi tayong mga Pinay kaya head over heals ibang lahi sa tin....

[recy]

Hello mga sis. I have a few questions. Are you girls and your hubby living here in manila or kung san man kayo from or sa country ni hubby?

If here in PH kayo stay paano un application ng permanent resident visa ng hubby nyo?

My boyfriend will be back this April for permanent na and he'll look for a job. Probably December ang wedding. So I was wondering if may mai-suggest kayo na pwede nya apply-an na work that will assist expat like him.

Thank you so much!

[imbisibol_]

my husband is a US citizen but came from filipino parents.  he grew up in the US, so he's still cut from a different cloth from me.  i've never had an amboy boyfriend before, and it was such a refreshing change.  he's direct to the point, doesn't like any riff-raff, and absolutely hates any drama.  he'll tell me what he wants or doesn't want very clearly- and yes, that goes for his preferences while in bed as well 

i felt like i was playing mind games with my past filipino boyfriends, so i'm very glad all that's over and done with!

[freelancer_babe]

Curious... Hindi ba sila kasing-babaero ng pinoy men?

Based on experience (naku ang daming kong kilalang nambababae mukhang matitino pa and working on professions that expect higher degree of integrity, and their poor wives just don't have any clue) and also coming from the threads here, parang mas masakit sa ulo ang male pinoys coz they succumb to temptation. I'm beginning to think infidelity as thing common to pinoy men, but I'm not really sure if some sisses married here have problems with infidelity ng foreigner husbands nila. I have the impression na mukhang mas tapat ang mga foreigners.

[imbisibol_]

^ i think, and of course i may be wrong and cannot make sweeping generalizations- but it looks like filipino men have a hang up with their machismo.  it's like they need to prove something- and if having side dishes make them feel accomplished, then that's what they do.

i've only had one non-filipino relationship, so i'm certainly no expert, but my husband seems very confident with his masculinity, so there's no constant, gnawing need to prove how delectable he is to the opposite sex. 

[little_princess]

recy, my hubby and i live here in manila when he is not working. when he is working, i go back to my parent's place. with regard to permanent residency, you have to check with the BI pano yung process but I also know an immigration lawyer who can help you. as for a job, it depends on his career path or what he does abroad. i suggest he applies from abroad to be treated as an expat kasi if he applies from manila, treated as a local na lang siya.

freelancer_babe, i think naman in every race may mga babaero. maybe it's more defined sa ibang races pero i think nasa tao pa din yan.