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[Chinito]

hi phoenuiqxz,

First things first, i suppose you do not fully trust your partner, the fact na chine check mo yung phone niya is something na  parang your in doubt of him. you wanna know what his up to when your not together.
sa totoo lang most men has tendency to be like this , and guilty ako sa ganitong act. Hindi sa kinakampihan ko yung bf mo ha, paki ko sa kanya.
i dont know kung anong tawag dito pero i have this instances na mangulit ng iba pag na bo bore ako for no exact reason, parang it feeds my ego to know na meron pang girl na mag eentertain sakin or may papansin pa sakin if mag aya akong lumabas. i just wanna know kung go siya or not and it feels good to know na may papatol pa sa gagawin ko. it doesn't mean na pag pumayag siya e gusto ko na rin, most of the time biglang magbabago isip ko dahil i already got the answer and suddenly lose my interest. parang trip lang. i'm sure you wont understand me pero ganon minsan. 
because men love challenges, they usually test their charm, try new things, experiment ,they want to know certain things  to see if it will work, we are being playful that sometimes na mimis interpret. but it doesn't mean that we don't love you anymore, you are still the most precious creature in our life and we can't afford to lose you.  minsan tignan niyo din yung role niyo as a gf baka naman nawawala na yung spark, or its getting boring na because of a routine set up.
If ever you gonna tackle the issue about what happen and why he did that, i suggest you to talk to him in a mature and calm way. start by explaining why you attempted to check his private messages and don't be afraid to apologize and be honest. 2nd ask him why he ask that girl for a drinking session? ask the reason (listen carefully) , if he answered that it's just a joke or he was some kinda trippin', demand for a better and sincere explanation in a way na maiintindihan mo. be simple and direct, try not to be sarcastic, kase baka ma provoke mo pa siya.  3rd don't be afraid to tell him what you feel, tell him kung bakit ka na hurt, yung implications etc. , sabihin mo lahat lahat regarding sa issue alone, don't jump into  a different topic baka kasi mag sanga sanga pa yung usapan niyo. stick to the topic alone.

4th. work for a resolution, he should commit na hindi na niya dapat gawin yon dahil it is not helping the relationship .parang nag te train ka lang ng kids, tell him its BAD. .make sure he understand!.
 at ikaw din try to work on your flaws, make an adjustments  sa mga ayaw niya, if he doesn't want you to stalk on his messages then respect it and be affirmative. mutual respect will ignite and bring back the trust. in other words re set the rules and expectations. (followed by an agreement) for both.

5th. be affectionate... look into his eyes, grab his hands and tell him sincerely how much you love him.
 a simple kiss on the cheek is sweet then hug him tight.  believe me he will feel you right after and loved you back... 
good luck! 

[christine1992]

@chinito:

na buhayan tuloy ako ng pag-asa with what you just said. Hindi naman postive pero at least it makes me think of an excuse why do guys do that. I had a similar situation with my bf now, yun nga lang ay facebook niya chini-check ko at yun nga, one time nakita ko conversation history niya with some girl.Though yung girl ang nag invite sa kanya, yung thought nalang na pinansin niya ito and even replied to her that, "sayang, work ako eh, next time nalang". I don't know if he mean what he said, pero totoo man o hindi, masakit pa rin. I would love to do those 5 steps but I don't think he's into talking.Kapag kasi pag-uusapan na ang mga ganong bagay sasabihin lang sa'kin, wala yun, ikaw lang mahal ko, pangit naman yun, ang OA mo naman, ang selosa, ganon. Hay naku. Ang mga lalaki talaga...

[phoenuiqxz]

Hi  Chinito. thanks for your advice, at least medyo naintindihan ko na from a guy's perspective. I will follow your advice and hope everything will work out

to sis christine1992, your guy should be able to explain his side of the situation to you an not just say na you are OA, etc. maybe try to talk to him again? hope things will turn out ok for both of us. goodluck

[christine1992]

Thank you sis. Ikaw din, sana maging okay na kayo. Mahirap pa kasi situation namin ngayon eh, we're not able to see each other very often kasi malayo trabaho niya. We keep our communication intact though via phone pero iba pa rin yung personal na nag-uusap di ba? We just had our 14th month together yesterday and I gave him a card telling him, how I really wish we could talk to sort things out. Okay ba yon? Hindi ko na hinintay reaction niya kasi he needs to go na. I don't know. Hope we'd be okay before christmas.

[phoenuiqxz]

hi sis christine1992. medyo ok na kami ng bf ko. sabi lang nya sakin na wag ko na sana pakialaman fne nya kasi di naman daw nya tinitingnan fne ko. we didnt talk that long yet, usually sa weekends kasi kami magkasama so i hope everything will be ok this wkend. yeah ok naman na you told him your feelings sa card pero sana siya na gumawa ng next step para magopen up. goodluck sis and wish you the best

[yabbikins]

sana okay na kayo sis. hayyyy. i still dont know what to do. parang im still in state of shock.

[christine1992]

I'm happy cuz we're having improvements now.

[sardonyxmemoirs]

Sis don't ignore this issue. Comfort is born out of familiarity, and remember that familiarity breeds resentment. So throw him off course a little for some unpredictability. Pull back. Kung araw-araw kayo nagkikita, try mo thrice a week. Kung magkasama kayo sa bahay, pursue more outdoor activities. He's a man. He loves the thrill of pursuit. Never make him feel that he has a complete hold of you, otherwise he will slack off. Now if he ends up augmenting to that distance you put instead of trying to chase you, then accept that he's not the man for you. Kung 6 years and 9 months pa lang he's not willing to work for you na, imagine for the rest of your life. And don't initiate a talk about this matter again. He already knows what you think and what you deserve. Telling him again and again will only be like nagging, which he will eventually grow to resent.

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[sardonyxmemoirs]

Sis, if you feel na panakip-butas ka lang, it doesn't matter kung talagang panakip-butas ka lang talaga o hindi. You can't let this go on. We get the love we think we deserve. Let him know that you won't accept any less than you deserve.  You don't deserve to be a fallback. If he works harder for you, good. If not, then break up with him. Ke takot man siyang masaktan or what, that's not an excuse for him to treat you coldly. You don't deserve his sh!t. Kung magpapakadakila ka, mawawalan siya ng respeto sayo kasi sooner or later, maiisip niya: "Ano ba tong desperadang ito hinahabol ako kahit ginag@go ko na. Wala na ba siyang respeto sa sarili?" And once he loses respect for you, things will only get worse.

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[sardonyxmemoirs]

So bakit ikaw? Bakit hindi si pretty ex-gf? One, baka takot na siya sa maganda, naghahanap ng babaeng insecure na tatanggap ng sh!t niya. Two, he likes you for you. (It's time you do the same!) Either way, as long as you love yourself, you'll turn out fine. So that's what you should do: learn to love yourself.

Tama si Bro Chinito. Maraming ways to self-improvement and personality development.

[sardonyxmemoirs]

My honest opinion? He wants to sleep with you. He hasn't "conquered" you yet, and it hurts his ego like hell so he can't stop bugging you until you give it. Of course, I could be wrong. He could really be interested in your other aspects. But as they say, 'once a womanizer, always a womanizer.' Ask yourself, is it worth it? Can you live with those "attitudes" na hindi mo nagugustuhan? (And don't expect him to change, sweetie). Do you want him back because you sincerely like him, or because the thought of having a "perfect" boyfriend bolsters your ego? If you choose to give him a chance, proceed with caution.

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[Chinito]

totally agree with sardonyx... galing! 

[Shadow Angel]

^tama unfinish business...

[ann08]

Hmmm Paano ba maging sweet sa text? Given na yung greetings na good morning good night ... ano pa ba pra prang feel na feel nung ka text na sweet ka? haha LOL

[littlejohn]

Sabi ng gf ko nitong december na break na daw kami noong september pa . Pero wala naman ako matandaan na mabigat na reason para magbreak,  execpt noong nahuli ko nakikipagflirt siya sa ibang guy.  Sinubukan ko ayusin ang problema noon at kala ko ok na. 3rd week of december, may occassion kaming dadaluhan, sabi niya punta lang daw siyang hospital  kasi may idadaan lang. Pagkalipas ng isang oras hindi  siya nagrereply, so nagtext ako ka-workmate niya, at noong nalaman niyang nagtext ako sa ka-workmate niya, nagalit sa akin ng sobra at sabi ay break na daw kami.  Todo soory at suyo ako.

Ngayon, manililigaw na lang daw ako niya. Ayaw daw niya ng hatid sundo, at dadalhan siya ng food or something sa work place niya. Pero dati noong, kami pa ay ginagawa ko naman iyon.

May times na malambing siya sa akin, pero madalas mainit ang ulo.

Tinanong ko nga kung may iba na siyang gusto? Sabi niya wala naman daw.
Tinanong ko kung may problema ba sa akin? Sabi niya wala at swerte daw magiging gf ko.

Hindi ko na alam kung anong klase panunuyo ang gagawin ko. Ginawa ko na ang pagiging personal na yaya niya, parang walang effect.
Mostly, nagrerequest siya na bili mo ako ng ganyan o ganon.

[yajale_22]

Long distance relationship kame then he went back here last November 2012. almost 2 years kameng LDR, naging kame through facebook and first time namen magkita nung umuwi nga sya dito nung Nov. 3 months lang vacation nya dito and babalik na sya abroad sa feb. Ang pinaka problema ko lang sa kanya, lagi syang walang time saken, laging nauuna yung mga friends nya than me, malapit na syang bumalik abroad pero 5 times pa lang kame nagkikita. Umuwi sya ng bicol kase taga dun talaga family nya one month sya nag stay dun. Pagbalik nya dito, pinakilala ko sya sa family ko and ok naman sya sa family ko. Text lang ang communication namen, minsan di pa magtitext or matagal magreply, tapos malalaman ko andun sa barkada, may ginagawa, may pinuntahan. We fought about this, I talked to him and even broke up with him kase nasasaktan na ko the way he treats me, sabi nya magbabago sya, na babawi sya pero hindi ko makita yung change, ganun pa rin eh..Now I'm thinking na isuko na sya...feeling ko mas lalo lang akong masasaktan pagbalik nya abroad, konti na lang yung time na pwede kameng magkasama pero ganito sya...napapagod na ko, parang lagi na lang ako nagaantay...tama ba yung desisyon ko?  na tapusin na lang to? hayy...

[atlantis_princess]

Hi, I just need some advice.  I've been with my bf for 2 1/2 years na.  He has a kid but he's not married.  I dont' have any problem with that.  My problem is he's so kuripot.  We don't go out.  We rarely watch movies kasi gastos daw.  We're living in by the way.  I've know him to be kuripot nung hindi pa kami pero di ko alam na sobrang kuripot.  Now i'm thinking long-term and di ko talaga makita growing old with someone na di ka man lang mabigyan ng kahit anong gift on special days like Christmas and birthdays.  Ako pa naman yung palabili ng food and gifts. Ngayon napapansin ko na the more na bumibili ako food, the more na di na sya naglalabas. Nasasanay na sya na ako.  And I hate it. I opened it up to him and he said bakit daw ako nag -a-ask ng kapalit sa mga binibigay ko sa knya.  I ended up being the materialistic girl. 

Is it too petty and cruel to break up with someone just because di ka nalilibre or nabibigyan ng gifts?  He's sweet and makulit.  hindi nambababae (as far as i know).  Pero yung pagiging kuripot nya is becoming a major turn off for me.  Ok naman salary nya. 

[Shadow Angel]

^sis atlantis ok lang naman mag kuripot pero hindi ko problema kay boyfie he loves to buy me things from clothes, shoes bag accessories gadgets.. chocolates, foods hilig namin mag foodtrips basta un alam nya type ko pero theres a time rin na ok lang kahit hindi nya ako binibili parang ok kahit wala o meron... Kung mahal mo naman sya sis diba para kasi dahil lang sa kuripot iiwanan mo na kesa naman gastador..pero wag ikaw ang gumastos humingi ka pambili nyo ng foods.. Kayo naman kakain e..

[devilish_einjel]

^^ ex ko din ganyan, mas masahol pa ata eh! haha, binibigyan naman niya ako gifts pero kapag lalabas kami, KKB kami sa gastos minsan sagot ko pa.. ultimo pamasahe ah kkb pa kami, kaloka.. pero nung nagka pera naman siya nilibre naman din niya ako.. once in a blue moon nga lang pala yun 

tungkol naman sa problem mo sis, baka may pinagiipunan siya na mahalaga diba? baka para sa future niyo, may mga taong ganon e na hanggat maari hindi gagastos..  ok lang naman siguro kung para sa family niyo din mapupunta.. pero since sabi mo na live-in kayo, then it means na kailangan niyo din mag share hindi lang ikaw yung buy ng buy.. i-weigh mo din sis, hindi ka niya nabibigyan ng gifts/nalilibre pero sweet naman siya, sa tingin mo di yun sapat? minsan kasi kahit hindi naman kailangan, naghahangad pa rin tayo ng something tangible to feel special e diba lalo na kung special occasions parang hindi sapat yung babatiin ka lang, lalo na kung may special someone ka talagang nag expect ka. pero sa totoo lang what really matter is that magkasama kayo na nag celebrate.. gifts/libre, material things lang yan sis,marami pa naman ways para maparandam niya ba special ka, katulad ng sabi ni sis shadow angel atleast hindi gastador mas mahirap yun.. ok naman salary niya sabi mo diba? so good provider naman siya sis? dun ka na lang mag focus.. 

[xRylaine]

hi sissies, share ko lang kasi nahihirapan na rin ako.
 in a relationship ako ngayon kay boyfie for 14months, and actually hindi na ko nagiging happy. napapagod na ko sobra, kasi ang dami na nya nagagawang mali, like yung ALWAYS  being late tuwing magkikita kami, as in 30mins-2hrs nya ko pinaghihintay which is alam ko its too much.. kaso hindi ko naman siya maiwan or hindi ko kayang umalis kasi hindi ko kaya kasi I really love him. And ngayon pa nainis ako sakanya kasi yung pinsan ko inadd siya, ee maganda talaga yung pinsan ko, then he kept on asking me stuffs about her, and nainis talaga ako. ewan ko napaka-insensitive nya.. kapag nagkikita kami okay kami, kahit gusto ko magalit at wag siya iforgive hindi ko magawa.. what will i do sissies.. sobrang bigat na ng loob ko.. kapag ganitong times napapagod na ko at gusto ko magpahinga at gusto na muna makipaghiwalay.. alam ko mababaw problem ko, pero help naman sissies,,:'(