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[devilish_einjel]

I think the other thread is locked na so I decided to make a new one.. so, I'll start kasi I have a problem with my boyfriend..

Bago pa lang kami, 1 month pa lang actually.. pero yung panliligaw siguro nagtagal ng almost 5 months.. longer pa nga e, may time na huminto siya. anyway, nung nasa courtship days pa lang kami feeling ko ok naman.. mabait kasi siya saka maalaga.. super maasikaso.. attracted na ko sa kanya nung una pero nung naging kami na parang nagbago.. basta hindi ako comfortable sa kanya, naiilang ako to be honest.. pag nilalambing niya ako parang naiinis ako, and I dont like it kapag tinititigan niya ako!  I know yung problem e nasa akin, I dont know rin sa sarili ko why Im acting up ng ganito.. medyo iniiwasan ko nga siya ngayon at nahahalata na niya.. hindi ko sinasagot mga tawag niya at kung magka text kami tipid ako magreply.. what will I do mga sis? I know ang sama ko, pinapaasa ko yung tao.. akala ko I will learn to love him e, pero parang napipilitan na lang ako ngayon, Im saying I love you sa kanya just because kailangan.. haay sissies help me, pano ba to 

[soLaris]

hi sis, it is better to be honest than being in a relationship na hindi ka sure sa feelings mo towards sa tao. sayang iyung time, money at laway nyo magkasama kung hindi din naman pala reciprocal iyung feelings. ikaw if you are in his position for sure makakahalata naman si so-called bf, magtataka ka din. maganda na iyung mag-heart to heart talk kayo at magmove na lang kesa mag-stay ka nga tapos hindi ka naman din happy. sayang ang panahon.

[jtansanco]

Guy's point of view. Tell him that you don't love him anymore. The spark is now gone. It's better to be honest than to make "paasa". Us guys hate it. It's better to have a closure than have the hanging and wondering what he did wrong.


Off topic:
When a guy tries to court a girl, do you prefer na sabihin ng guy na may intention siya or befriend muna? How can us guys get away from the dreaded friendzone??

[iwannabeasupermodel]

^i prefer na sabihin sa akin. kasi friendzone ka talaga pag ganon.

[Chinito]

If i were you, sasabihin ko na yung totoong nararamdaman ko. lay all your cards to him instead na mag pretend ka na you're okay, but deep inside you're melting. kase ganon din yon e, one way or the other masasaktan at may masaktan pa din sa gagawin mo. unless mag bago yung nararamdaman mo towards him.
you have 2 options 1st to tell him frankly that you don't feel the same way for him as before and you call it a quit;DONE. don't be afraid to say sorry if you think it would complete the scenario, mahirap gawin to at i'm sure you will realize how important na magpakatotoo lalo na sa aspect ng relationship, it takes gut, respect and patience to do this act.
 In this way you are being fair, mahirap man tanggapin sa part ng guy, pero there's no easy or gentle way to get out of the relationship and besides you've done your part in telling him what's inside you.. this will be the best option to lessen the cruelty of being cushioned in an unsteady affair.

2nd is to give him and yourself a chance to work on it. sabi nga ng nanay ko ang pagmamahal daw natutunan! It might be a blinded feeling or just part of your unstable emotion that's why you are getting lot of confusion and it's pretty normal anyway. Try to suffice what is missing for both of you, make an effort, explain, make him understand everything about you, teach him, show him what makes you smile, what makes laugh, what are the things you wanna do, EVERYTHING. just help him help you. malay mo it works in a surprising way you can't ever imagine. at least if it really doesn't work; you can say to yourself that you've done your part and no guiltiness or regrets in the end. you can just say "It really didn't work" .
Try to asses your true feelings for him before deciding. Make sure that you're letting him go because you don't love him no more and not just by shallow reasons.

Love works in all angles, it can be so good or so bad depending on how you would like it to be. It fancies your emotion and twist your brain out to the point that you're unconsciously no longer in control.
at the end of the day, bad it may seem you will get hurt or hurt somebody because of your actions..   
 

[teejiko]

^Very well said

I love the 2nd option and might try it in my current relationship

[devilish_einjel]

^ thanks sa lahat ng reply..  ahm, bigyan ko pa ng kunting chance tutal bago pa lang naman kami at marami pa pwede mangyari, pero if all else fails, I know what to do na.. salamat mga sis and bro..

[Chinito]

^ thanks sa lahat ng reply..  ahm, bigyan ko pa ng kunting chance tutal bago pa lang naman kami at marami pa pwede mangyari, pero if all else fails, I know what to do na.. salamat mga sis and bro..

Pray harder and see.

[annika]

Hi TS!

"basta hindi ako comfortable sa kanya, naiilang ako to be honest.. pag nilalambing niya ako parang naiinis ako, and I dont like it kapag tinititigan niya ako!"

nasa friend zone lang talaga kayo, sa una oo kilig.. yung unang bf ko ganyan din halos nadidiri na nga ako na lapitan niya nung umakbay nga siya nasiko ko bigla e LOL    tell him nalang na wala talagang chance kesa umabot sa point na mangulit na siya at mainis ka baka kase isipin niya nagpapakipot ka lang kaya sabihin mo nalang na wala talaga siyang chance at sumali na sia sa SMP thread.. joke!

[devilish_einjel]

^ haha. LOL natawa naman ako sis, hehe.. pareho na lang kaya kami sumali sa SMP? hehe.. kasi sis sobrang bait niya e, wala naman ako nakikitang mali kung bakit hindi ko siya dapat magustuhan.. ako lang talaga tong loka loka siguro.. pano mo sinabi sa kanya sis?

[annika]

Inaway ko ng todo para lumayo.. bad ako? OO! hehe.. e kase bata pa naman ako nun! mas ok nga yata na bata pa ako nun kase mas madali magdecide unlike ngayon. nung inaway ko ilang months din kinausap ko siya na as friends nalang talaga.. Nope! hindi ka loka loka wala lang talagang feelings yun yun!

[devilish_einjel]

tapos ano sabi niya sis? hm. bigyan ko pa siguro ng chance sis baka pag napadalos dalos ako magsisi ako sa huli.. 

[annika]

haha oo nga baka ikaw pa magsisisi.. choosy lang? Lol.. wala ok naman sa kanya buti nga hangang sa huli mabait pa din talaga siya kausap.. ayun may asawa na siya ngayon at nasa dubai na.. wala naman regret sa side ko kase hangang ngayon kapag nakikita ko siya sa fb parang nadidiri pa din ako e! choosy hahahah

[devilish_einjel]

haha.. lol nandidiri talaga e noh.. anyway, thanks sa advice mo sis hehe

[schumine]

Need some advice mga sissies & bro's.

I'm in a LDR, si bf walang experience kung pano mag treat ng gf, pano ba ang nasa relationship. 5 months na kami, lately lang parang hindi ko siya nararamdaman, i mean his love for me. feel ko nagiging unfair na ko sa kanya, dahil naiisip ko itong ganito, gayong nung bago maging kami, he told me na "turuan / i guide ko siya kung pano ba" since wala nga siya experience. He's  4 yrs older than me. Nakikita ko naman na nag aadjust siya, at my effort naman on his side kahit papano. Pinaka communication na namin is YM, good morning greetings at konting kwentuhan habang nasa bus siya going to work at ganun din pag pauwi. Siguro yung tawag mabibilang ko mga 4 times palang. hahaha! Praning lang ako siguro today.. Hindi rin siya mahilig mag i love you, "twice palang, sa ym pa" haha! naalala ko nung last na tumawag siya. ang end is "bye, ingat". tapos nagtxt siya "ganun lang?" so reply ko "kabado ka pa e, damang dama ko. saka na lang pag di ka na kabado" hahaha.. Hays.. di kaya sa mental na bagsak ko neto..  hahaha!

[Chinito]

Need some advice mga sissies & bro's.

I'm in a LDR, si bf walang experience kung pano mag treat ng gf, pano ba ang nasa relationship. 5 months na kami, lately lang parang hindi ko siya nararamdaman, i mean his love for me. feel ko nagiging unfair na ko sa kanya, dahil naiisip ko itong ganito, gayong nung bago maging kami, he told me na "turuan / i guide ko siya kung pano ba" since wala nga siya experience. He's  4 yrs older than me. Nakikita ko naman na nag aadjust siya, at my effort naman on his side kahit papano. Pinaka communication na namin is YM, good morning greetings at konting kwentuhan habang nasa bus siya going to work at ganun din pag pauwi. Siguro yung tawag mabibilang ko mga 4 times palang. hahaha! Praning lang ako siguro today.. Hindi rin siya mahilig mag i love you, "twice palang, sa ym pa" haha! naalala ko nung last na tumawag siya. ang end is "bye, ingat". tapos nagtxt siya "ganun lang?" so reply ko "kabado ka pa e, damang dama ko. saka na lang pag di ka na kabado" hahaha.. Hays.. di kaya sa mental na bagsak ko neto..  hahaha!

Unang una sabi mo walang siyang experience sa relationship.. it means ikaw ang first gf niya, tama ba?
Kasi isa sa deffensive mechanism ng mga lalaki yan pagsasabi ng kahinaan nila para at the end hindi sila ang masisisi. second, nasabi mo na 5mos pa lang kayo at LDR pa.. well, do you expect that he will praise you as being the goddess of his life gayong sobrang premature pa lang ng relasyon niyo.. don't expect too much girl mahirap yan baka nga sa mental ang bagsak mo. 5 mos is too early to tell, hindi pa masyado na build up yung emotion niyo sa isa't isa.. baka pag medyo nalibang sya makalimutan niyang may gf siya e.   If i were you  mag set ka ng pang matagalan na expectation, what i mean is, do you think that both of you will still be together?, when? and how long?. do you see yourself being a long distance girlfriend?, do you trust him? can your love and his love suffice the boredom of not being physically together?..if sa tingin mo di mo kakayanin yung ganitong set up, then it's time for you to plan ahead, wag magsayang ng oras and be fair to him as well.

 actually madami pang ibang hindrance ng sitwasyon mo ngayon. at marami ring paraan para maging masaya kayo sa isa't isa pero hindi magiging madali kung LDR kayo..  ang LDR ay para sa mga couples na may NAPAKA tibay na pinagsamahan at matatag na pagmamahalan. which can only be proved  through TIME being together...

[christine1992]

Hello! I would like to share my story naman:

I am currently in a relationship now and at first happy kami. Happy talaga ako pag sya kasama ko. Malambing sya at mahilig sa mga surprises for which, gusto ko talaga in a guy. Then during our 10th month, I found out that he's cheating on me for some girl na ex gf ng katrabaho niya. Nag panic ang whole body ko as a reaction sa aking nalaman. Masakit sya pero di ko sya ma let go. He asked for 2nd chance though at sabi ako ang totoo nyang mahal. Despite all the hurts , I learn to forgive him but never forget the pain. But really, yung nangyaring pagtataksil niya ay kahit kailan hindi mawala sa isip ko. Im always in the state of paranoid until this november. I've met my ex, for which I had a 2-year relationship. Hindi alam ni bf na nagkita kami, but we only talk about what happened to us cuz actually walang closure ang relasyon namin ni ex. Hindi ko ma explain nararamdaman ko nung umiyak siya at sabing masakit daw ang nangyari sa amin. And asking if we can be together again. I dont give him an answer cuz from then on, lito na ako. Nasa isip ko kasi, nung kami ni ex, ay wala akong problema about pambabae, even once. I was just so childish and selfish that time nung kami pa. Hanggang ngayon nagtetext pa kami at nagkakamustahan. He wants me back. Habang ang sitwasyon naman namin ni bf ay lumalala. I became paranoid. I kept checking his phone and fb, kasi lagi akong nagdududa sa kanya, at usually, ito ang cause ng away namin. What I was thinking is, kung c ex lang sana, di sana ako ganito kasi assured ako emotionally na ako lang mahal niya, but then, I love my bf. Afraid ako sa pwedeng mangyari sa amin ng bf ko kasi seems like wala syang effort sa relationship namin and I want someone, who's willing to give his all for me.

[coco_CRUNCH]

sis schumine, hi! pov ko lang naman to.. pero parang sinabi ni chinito, bago palang relationship niyo so hayaan niyo muna mag grow.. pero dapat kasama din kayo sa mag grow ah.. dont expect too much din since ikaw ang first girlfriend niya... and actually, you really can't give him instructions on how to be in a relationship... it doesn't have a manual na may "how to" or relationship manual for dummies. it's not like that. it takes effort and work and experience from both parties.... dont think na your being unfair... i think you're not naman... just try to adjust and talk about it... magiging maayos din yan... LDR is not easy.. but it can survive as long as kayong 2 is ready to fight the odds..

[alessandra90]

I dunno if what I'm going to share is a real problem but it seem to me like it is. Si boyfriend kasi too comfortable sa relationship namin. 6 years & 9 mos na kami. I know nothing's wrong with being comfortable with each other pero kasi over na, umaabot na sa point na he's already taking me for granted (he's not aware of it of course) kasi akala nya ok lang sa akin lahat -- & trust me, I know when I'm being taken for granted. Hindi lang once na we talked about this at di rin lang once na nagsabi siyang he'll try better next time pero ganun pa din. I know he loves me so much just as I love him. That is not too strong a reason naman for me to give up lahat ng pinagsamahan namin. Anyone, please enlighten meee...

[schumine]

Unang una sabi mo walang siyang experience sa relationship.. it means ikaw ang first gf niya, tama ba?
Kasi isa sa deffensive mechanism ng mga lalaki yan pagsasabi ng kahinaan nila para at the end hindi sila ang masisisi. second, nasabi mo na 5mos pa lang kayo at LDR pa.. well, do you expect that he will praise you as being the goddess of his life gayong sobrang premature pa lang ng relasyon niyo.. don't expect too much girl mahirap yan baka nga sa mental ang bagsak mo. 5 mos is too early to tell, hindi pa masyado na build up yung emotion niyo sa isa't isa.. baka pag medyo nalibang sya makalimutan niyang may gf siya e.   If i were you  mag set ka ng pang matagalan na expectation, what i mean is, do you think that both of you will still be together?, when? and how long?. do you see yourself being a long distance girlfriend?, do you trust him? can your love and his love suffice the boredom of not being physically together?..if sa tingin mo di mo kakayanin yung ganitong set up, then it's time for you to plan ahead, wag magsayang ng oras and be fair to him as well.

 actually madami pang ibang hindrance ng sitwasyon mo ngayon. at marami ring paraan para maging masaya kayo sa isa't isa pero hindi magiging madali kung LDR kayo..  ang LDR ay para sa mga couples na may NAPAKA tibay na pinagsamahan at matatag na pagmamahalan. which can only be proved  through TIME being together...

Thanks sa reply sis, yeah ako first gf niya. hayss.. pano ko ba sasabihin sa kanya na dapat ganito, yung hindi ako lalabas na demanding.  TIA

sis schumine, hi! pov ko lang naman to.. pero parang sinabi ni chinito, bago palang relationship niyo so hayaan niyo muna mag grow.. pero dapat kasama din kayo sa mag grow ah.. dont expect too much din since ikaw ang first girlfriend niya... and actually, you really can't give him instructions on how to be in a relationship... it doesn't have a manual na may "how to" or relationship manual for dummies. it's not like that. it takes effort and work and experience from both parties.... dont think na your being unfair... i think you're not naman... just try to adjust and talk about it... magiging maayos din yan... LDR is not easy.. but it can survive as long as kayong 2 is ready to fight the odds..

Thanks sa reply sis, yun din sinasabi ko sa sarili ko. ayoko rin magpadalos dalos ng decision porket ganito nararamdaman ko now. Meron ba talagang tao na hindi showy?  Tingin mo, okay lang na i ask ko sakanya na "sa tingin mo ba mag susurive relationship natin (LDR)?" hmm...