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Author Topic: my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!  (Read 7217 times)

anne_mae

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my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!
« on: June 20, 2012, 10:49:44 pm »
 a girl added me in facebook out of the blue. So since hindi ko ugali na basta basta na lang mag aaprove ng mga friend requests. I checked th girl's connection sa akin. So since nakita ko na we go to the same college, so i approved her. I wasn't interested in knowing anything about the person, so binalewala ko after inapprove ko yung friend request. Suddenly i wondered nagmessage yung girl. She gave me her number and told mto text her. She said she wanted to know what happened between sa amin nung guy before. It made me think uloy na why is my past with the guy suddenly became an interest to her diba. So nakipag-usap ako sa girl even though i really told her that it doesnt work that way. I let her realize since mas bata siya sa akin that hindi tama na sa ex siya lalapit para humingi ng feebackregarding the guy. Just want to ask for your opinions if i should helpthe girl, give her advices or let her solve it her way?

Im thankful though na hindi kami nagtagal nung guy but naaawa ako sa girl because she experienced everything that ive been throughbut mild pa lang yung sa kanya. Hai, i want to be a friend to her but ayoko rin may isipin siyaif ill help her. Pls help and please make it long for me to digest it more.

aquacharly

  • Guest
Re: my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!
« Reply #1 on: June 21, 2012, 12:49:01 am »
She asked for it - tell her The Truth.

HOW MUCH of The Truth will you tell her?
What is your motivation for sharing The Truth?
Kinda in conflict ka?  Can you clarify? Naaawa ka .. You  want to be a friend...but ayaw mo isipin nya you will help her???




whatswithjuly

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Re: my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!
« Reply #2 on: June 21, 2012, 01:23:35 am »
ang mahirap kasi if you tell her the truth, your ex would think you're just being bitter. you don't know as well, baka isipin din yan ng girl though she's asking for your help. to what extent sya maniniwala sayo, hindi natin alam. she might listen, but i think you should be aware din na bf nya un and if he's in love with the guy, she'll justify things sa sarili nya... and mas mag-matter pa din ang feelings nya towards the guy.

if i were in your shoes, i wouldn't talk to the girl na lang. i understand that you wanted to help her. but ako, i've done some things na my intention is to help pero in the end, ako pa napahamak by telling the truth. kasi may possibility that this girl will drop names and ikaw pa masisi kasi nakialam ka. IMO lang .. and based from my experience. ;)

aquacharly

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Re: my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!
« Reply #3 on: June 21, 2012, 02:53:14 am »
IMO, The Truth always prevails.
She asked for it -- how can you be blamed?  Hindi mo naman sya kilala,  to begin with.
The ex, her current, may call you a Liar -- but Lols,  unless he  has gone into major reform -- he will run true to form. Who will laugh last? Who is the liar?

IMO, so what if she believes you or not?  She asked for it, take it or leave it.
Atchaka, haynako -- don't we all know a woman in love MAY.CHOOSE to be deaf  & blind to all? 
But nagtanong, eh di sagutin.  What do I care what the  ex will think?  Basta, The Truth ha.
Now, if you wanna go fine print on this -- you may say: As far as I understand what our relationship was... Or, what I experienced was.... Etc etc etc

Nagmalakas loob the  girl to seek you out.
Nagpakumbaba sya to ask for your help...
1 human being to another, asking for help --  IMO - sasagutin ko with The Truth, as much as I decide is appropriate.
If after helping her -- Ako pa binaliktad -- fine, it will be just a matter of time before she suffers The Truth.
The Truth always comes out.

But then.. Isn't that 1 good way of Closure?   That you can EMPATHIZE with the current GF and step back to tell her what went wrong, what you and your ex BOTH could not  overcome, kaya The End kayo?   You won't necessarily come across as bitter/regretful naman.  Pareho lang kayo  decided to search for a better match to your  individual selves, ganon lang.     You can tell The Truth  & still remain friends with your ex.  -- Well,  at least hindi kayo mag batuhan pag nag meet.  Hehe

So, keep out the emotions, keep  out the judgments -- just tell her The Truth, as much as you deem appropriate.  Like, illustrative example lang ito ha --   Darling, nice to be excited at the edge of a cliff with so much beauty to behold -- but What If  matulak  ka and you plunge to such great depths?  So, you give her guidelines para avoid matulak sya.  No need to guarantee tutulak sya, no need to bet she will surely be another Humpty Dumpty.   As it is, feel nya na  the danger na puede syang matulak di ba?   Can you, seeing a stranger at the edge of a cliff, in danger of falling -- can you stand by and say nothing?  Can you?

So it boils down to what you perceive is the good and fair thing to do with her request for historical information. This issue of yours -- NO right or wrong answer yan, it's your choice/decision.   

Unless, sya yung cause of your troubles with your ex... In which case, tara! tulak natin yan. Lolz.





dumpee.o13

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Re: my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!
« Reply #4 on: June 21, 2012, 03:45:40 am »
She asked for it - tell her The Truth.

^ yeah, agree. just tell her the truth. nothing more, nothing less.

autophobic

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Re: my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!
« Reply #5 on: June 21, 2012, 04:08:02 am »
better ignore her. sabi mo nga you dont know the girl so why bother help her? and you also dont know kung ano talaga intensyon nya baka mamaya ikaw pa maging masama. if ever naman tulungan mo yan, in the end si bf nya prin ang paniniwalaan nya. at kung my problema sya sa ex mu labas kana dun, wag ka nya idamay.

chinrogue

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Re: my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!
« Reply #6 on: June 21, 2012, 05:11:54 am »
ako naman i would stay out of it. you'd be inviting drama in. stress lang yan.
if ever kulitin ka ng girl, mapapagod din yan hehe.

bangs29

  • Guest
Re: my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!
« Reply #7 on: June 21, 2012, 11:19:08 am »
IMO, The Truth always prevails.
She asked for it -- how can you be blamed?  Hindi mo naman sya kilala,  to begin with.
The ex, her current, may call you a Liar -- but Lols,  unless he  has gone into major reform -- he will run true to form. Who will laugh last? Who is the liar?



 ;) agree

nicoletta

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Re: my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!
« Reply #8 on: June 25, 2012, 04:21:24 pm »
I suppose if you really feel like telling her, just go ahead to the best of your memory.  The fact that you communicated with her means that you really want to divulge some information. 

baliwsayo

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Re: my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!
« Reply #9 on: June 25, 2012, 04:51:46 pm »
Di mo pala siya friend eh di unfriend mo na. Kung naging masama man yun ex mo sa yo dati, well, pag sinabi mo pa yun tutuo dun sa girl eh parang di mo na binigyan ng pagkakataon magbago yun ex mo di ba? Less talk less mistake na lang sis. Not unless you want to play the devil's advocate...  ;)

rianne_mallows

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Re: my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!
« Reply #10 on: July 01, 2012, 10:27:15 pm »
i agree with aquacharly. just tell the truth.

 after that, back out ka na. unfriend etc etc.. to avoid the upcoming drama. at least nasabi mo na kailangan niya. who knows, nagcocollect lang yan evidence. im pretty sure hindi lang ikaw ang ex na ni-contact  niyan

if the guy is already a renewed man, yung info mo, wala din naman effect kung nagmamahalan sila.
kung ganun pa din naman si guy, atleast makita ni girl kung ano pinapasok at papasukin pa niya.

whatever the outcome of their relationship is, labas ka dun kasi nagsabi ka lang naman ng totoo

Kriman

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Re: my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!
« Reply #11 on: July 19, 2012, 07:02:22 pm »
tell the truth
sabi namen :)  ;D

nageinna

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Re: my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!
« Reply #12 on: July 19, 2012, 10:26:54 pm »
interesting, hati opinion ng mga sissies natin here. first things first, i want to ask the same question by aquacharly, what's your motivation in telling the truth? just to help her lang? yun lang? ikaw lang makakapag weigh ng sitch niyo to be honest. if i were in your place i'll distance myself nalang. tutal wala na ko sa kung ano man meron sila. kung may problema sila, or kung may gusto siya malaman about kay ex mo, hayaan mo siya malaman niya by herself and ayusin nilang dalawa as a COUPLE yung problema nila. kasi true enough, at first you will think simpleng bagay lang yan. magkukuwento ka lang naman o sasagutin mo lang tanong niya, but for sure masasabit pangalan mo diyan. diyan magsisimula complications. except nalang if there's something na "life threatening" na you have to warn her about. but if not, just let them deal their issues.

honey-ecclaire

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Re: my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!
« Reply #13 on: July 19, 2012, 10:46:15 pm »
bakit kailangan nya ng tulong?...may poblema sila?..eh anong magagwa ng past sa problema ng kasalukuyan?...nakakaawa nga sya dahil di maganda yung epekto nung relasyon nila sa kanya..Maging investigator ba?...

sabihin mo lang just focus on what they have right now..past is past and should remain to the past...
kaloka si girl ha!

hot_chili

  • Guest
Re: my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!
« Reply #14 on: July 20, 2012, 08:33:57 pm »
Tell her what she wants to know about you and the ex, but dont give her any advice sa kung ano man ang problema nila

skyrimgal

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Re: my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!
« Reply #15 on: August 16, 2012, 04:33:00 am »
minsan kapag nakikisabad ka sa love life ng ibang tao, ikaw pa ang nagmumukhang masama kahit na ikaw naman ang tinakbuhan at hiningan ng opinyon/advice/help. kaya pag dating sa love life na hindi naman akin, hindi ako nakiki-involve. bahala sila sa buhay nila.

just out of curiosity, ano ba mga tanong sayo nung gf ni ex?

tomatostellar

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Re: my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!
« Reply #16 on: August 16, 2012, 07:02:23 am »
imo, none of your business na yun..

Ireneeeeee

  • Guest
Re: my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!
« Reply #17 on: September 25, 2013, 02:29:08 pm »
^scary! anyway, given the situation of TS, I won't befriend her but I will briefly tell the truth on why we broke up and wish her luck!

simang

  • Guest
Re: my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!
« Reply #18 on: September 25, 2013, 02:44:16 pm »
Kung ano man nagyayare sa kanila ng ex bf mo is no longer your business so i guess since alam mo na na she's fishing for feedback, back away na lang. I mean ano bang mapapala mo if magkwento ka sa kanya. I just dont see the point na kausapin sya.

cessy_may08

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Re: my ex-bf's current gf added and messaged me in fb!!!
« Reply #19 on: September 27, 2013, 03:11:02 pm »
Kung ano man nagyayare sa kanila ng ex bf mo is no longer your business so i guess since alam mo na na she's fishing for feedback, back away na lang. I mean ano bang mapapala mo if magkwento ka sa kanya. I just dont see the point na kausapin sya.

Korek! Problema niya na yun. Labas ka na dun sis. :) Less talk less mistake ika nga. :)

 

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