Author Topic: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage  (Read 83719 times)

i_v_y

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #20 on: May 06, 2012, 10:36:14 pm »
matagal na pala kayong married, if you dont mind sis wala pa ba kayo balak mag ka baby? kasi diba minsan nagbabago ang mga guys pag may baby na, syempre may mag hohold on na sa inyo, iisipin na niya yung future ng anak niyo.
 
alam mo nakakatuwa ka nga eh, kasi di ka tulad ng iba na super go g*g* talaga over their husbands na parang wala ng tinira sa mga sarili nila and base sa mga answers mo dito you have a strong personality na kahit anong mangyari sa inyo ng husband mo kakayanin mo,. pag kelangan mo ng kausap andito lang naman kami. malalampasan mo din yan.  ;)

ttc kaming for 6 years. i had 2 miscarriages in the past and after that nahirapan na na kami. last year nung ang cclomid ako, super stressed ako. lumabas din sa bibig nia na hindi nia priority muna daw ang magka anak kasi nag intay na daw sia ng matagal kaya. na hurt ako nun kasi parang ako lang ang may gusto. eventually nag sorry din sia. pero sis, isang banda okay na din na hindi kami nagkaanak kasi baka hindi rin sia magbago kawawa lang anak ko.
Sayang walang "like button" sa GT hehe, I love how you've put it sis aquacharly.

I think the mere fact na nakaya ni sis i_v_y to see the situation clearly despite her love for her husband is sa sugal nya(if I may use the above analogy), hindi nya itinaya lahat. May itinira sya sa sarili nya. Self-respect, self-diginity, self-love, whatever you call it, I'm glad you have kept it with you sis i_v_y.

You deserve better than that. ;)

sis salamat. i really needed that. Lahat ng ito ay nakakaya ko because of the grace of the Lord. I am not holding on to anyone's promises in the world and not even to my own promises, but to the promises of the Lord. He said "Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord. - Psalm 27:14  and " there is a time for everything - Ecc  chapter 3.

What is amazing is that when we first separated, God spoke to me in Ecclesiastes 3. Now that we are separated again, He spoke to me through Psalm 27:14

Mga sis, salamat sa words of encouragement. I realized that I had to do this habang may respeto pa ako sa sarili ko.

ishko

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #21 on: May 07, 2012, 06:38:00 pm »
this thread makes me cry...

ang hirap pala... sis ko nagkaganun but now, she found her love and hopefully magtagal na

i_v_y

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #22 on: May 07, 2012, 07:59:53 pm »
this thread makes me cry...

ang hirap pala... sis ko nagkaganun but now, she found her love and hopefully magtagal na

thats inspiring sis. it all starts by making a decision.

mahirap talaga kasi marriage is such a huge part of our lives. it will make or break you. wala sa atin may gusto ng ganito. walang gusto na masira ang mga plans for our lives.

honey-ecclaire

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #23 on: May 08, 2012, 04:28:02 pm »
oo mare,mahirap talaga na mafail sa Marriage it's like nagiging batayan na ng pagkatao mo...Your intelligence,faith pati ang moral ng tao is being question pagdating sa marriage...

I know na sa mga depressed areas it's normal na lang na may other person involve but for us who are trying our best to make it work....talagang it will make or break you!

It's really hard to say MOVE ON,lalo na if di naman talaga namin alam the whole picture and the persons involve but we are saying what we may will do if this  may happen to us(wag naman sana)....

Prayers really works!and ito lang ang matatag na makakapitan natin...

beatrize zuri

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #24 on: May 08, 2012, 07:47:04 pm »
hay! mahirap talaga, pero ang tanging magagawa mo lang sa ngayon is to move on mahirap pero kelangan. kita mo after niyan mahahanap mo din ang para sayo, yung happiness na walang kapantay at walang katapusan  ;) . wag mo na siyang isipin sis, para mas makapag move on ka isipin mo na lang yung mga bad traits na super kinaiinisan mo sa kanya, kasi kung puro good memories ang iisipin mo eh mahihirapan ka talaga. mag out of town ka sama mo family mo or barkada mo para malibang ka naman at makapag isip isip ka din. dont worry sis, malalampasan mo din yan  :)

JINJIN:*

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #25 on: May 08, 2012, 08:21:48 pm »
you will move on sis..that is for sure.

I remember myself posting about crying...yung post ko about pagiyak ng bongang bongga. Ngayon, wala na kong luhang maiiyak. As in naibuos na..nung nakaraan lang narinig ko siya nag iloveu sa kabit niya sa phone, nasaktan ang ego ko, pero wala ng luha.

Magiging manhid ka rin sis. And eventually makaka move forward ka na. Hugs for you sis!

i_v_y

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #26 on: May 08, 2012, 09:32:26 pm »
you will move on sis..that is for sure.

I remember myself posting about crying...yung post ko about pagiyak ng bongang bongga. Ngayon, wala na kong luhang maiiyak. As in naibuos na..nung nakaraan lang narinig ko siya nag iloveu sa kabit niya sa phone, nasaktan ang ego ko, pero wala ng luha.

Magiging manhid ka rin sis. And eventually makaka move forward ka na. Hugs for you sis!

sis you are letting it happen? no judgement pero meron talagang wives who choose that path. i know someone who has been allowing her hubby to have another family for 20 years. at masakit pa din until now.


thank you sis for the words of encouragement. pinagppray ko nga kay Lord na sana tanggalin na Nia yung love ko para sa asawa ko.

oo mare,mahirap talaga na mafail sa Marriage it's like nagiging batayan na ng pagkatao mo...Your intelligence,faith pati ang moral ng tao is being question pagdating sa marriage...

I know na sa mga depressed areas it's normal na lang na may other person involve but for us who are trying our best to make it work....talagang it will make or break you!

It's really hard to say MOVE ON,lalo na if di naman talaga namin alam the whole picture and the persons involve but we are saying what we may will do if this  may happen to us(wag naman sana)....

Prayers really works!and ito lang ang matatag na makakapitan natin...
hay! mahirap talaga, pero ang tanging magagawa mo lang sa ngayon is to move on mahirap pero kelangan. kita mo after niyan mahahanap mo din ang para sayo, yung happiness na walang kapantay at walang katapusan  ;) . wag mo na siyang isipin sis, para mas makapag move on ka isipin mo na lang yung mga bad traits na super kinaiinisan mo sa kanya, kasi kung puro good memories ang iisipin mo eh mahihirapan ka talaga. mag out of town ka sama mo family mo or barkada mo para malibang ka naman at makapag isip isip ka din. dont worry sis, malalampasan mo din yan  :)

lahat naman ng bagay mahirap mag move on. not just a marriage.. anywhere na comfort zone naten, mahirap alisan. pero ika nga ni aquacharly, new begginnings are always hard but these are a lot better than dead ends.

salamat mga sis.

ishko

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #27 on: May 09, 2012, 02:09:27 pm »
my sister doesn't want to be separated with her hubby kahit na lagi siyang niloloko nito..

she kept on holding on.. but one day, she can't find her hubby kasi sumama sa ibang babae.. it may not be worth holding on at all...

JINJIN:*

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #28 on: May 09, 2012, 03:59:45 pm »
^^ no im not letting it happen.

Civil nalang kami, nasa isang bubong pero hindi na couple.

He will move out soon. Yan ang pinakaaabangan ko sis.

By the way, sa katulad naten na seperated, hindi pa huli ang lahat. Kanina lang me nakasabay akong neighbor sa flat namin, nag good morning lang ako kase inantay niya ako (nauna kase siya sa lift) hindi ko alam na ang isang good morning eh mauuwi sa bigayan ng phone number. Magkakape kami soon, kabitbahay ko siya so nothing to worry. So meaning sis, baby step lang and the best has yet to come, I am sure plano to ng Diyos.

simplepink

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #29 on: May 09, 2012, 04:29:14 pm »
ttc kaming for 6 years. i had 2 miscarriages in the past and after that nahirapan na na kami. last year nung ang cclomid ako, super stressed ako. lumabas din sa bibig nia na hindi nia priority muna daw ang magka anak kasi nag intay na daw sia ng matagal kaya. na hurt ako nun kasi parang ako lang ang may gusto. eventually nag sorry din sia. pero sis, isang banda okay na din na hindi kami nagkaanak kasi baka hindi rin sia magbago kawawa lang anak ko.

parang ang kapal naman ng mukha ng asawa mo... ??? sorry ha.. pero parang ang dating sa akin eh nagpapasalamat na din sya na wala kayong anak. alam mo sis, tama lang talaga yung ginawa mo na iwan ang asawa mo, saka pwede wag mo ng balikan kung sakaling magmakaawa sya na bumalik ka.. sa ginawa nya kasi sayo, wala na yung respeto.. tama ka nga na talagang feeling mo di ka importante, dahil na yun sa ginawa ng asawa mo.. maraming tao naman na pwede magparamdam sayo na importante ka.. maswerte ka kasi nandyan ang parents mo.

ishko

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #30 on: May 09, 2012, 04:49:20 pm »
feeling ko naman na kung may anak, mas madali sa babae ang magmove on kasi may focus ng attention.. tsaka ang sarap ng may baby na alam mong magmamahal sa iyo at hindi ka iiwan di tulad ng hubby.. yun tipong may pag-iikutan ang buhay mo

simplepink

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #31 on: May 09, 2012, 05:27:09 pm »
^ tama ka! yan nga din ang sinabi sa akin ng family ko nung nakipaghiwalay ako sa husband ko.. naisip ko, kaya nila sinabi yun para di na ako mag-asawa hehe!

i_v_y

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #32 on: May 10, 2012, 12:24:24 pm »
^^ no im not letting it happen.

Civil nalang kami, nasa isang bubong pero hindi na couple.

He will move out soon. Yan ang pinakaaabangan ko sis.

By the way, sa katulad naten na seperated, hindi pa huli ang lahat. Kanina lang me nakasabay akong neighbor sa flat namin, nag good morning lang ako kase inantay niya ako (nauna kase siya sa lift) hindi ko alam na ang isang good morning eh mauuwi sa bigayan ng phone number. Magkakape kami soon, kabitbahay ko siya so nothing to worry. So meaning sis, baby step lang and the best has yet to come, I am sure plano to ng Diyos.

hi sis. thats good to hear. just keep praying for God's best to come. Hingin mo yung eksaktong qualities.

axlrocksmyworld

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #33 on: May 10, 2012, 06:25:24 pm »
sis i_v_y, baka soon sundan ko rin ang ginawa mo.. i'm just waiting for my BIL to go back to saudi, kasi i don't want to create a drama sa house ng inlaws ko, masaya sila ngayon kasi nakabaksyon si bayaw so ayoko maging killjoy hehe.. i tried appying the secrets of fascinating womanhood but i guess it not working, hard and risky itong gagawin ko pero kasi may natitira pa naman akong respeto sa sarili ko sa i think it's better to leave and move on with my son :)

i_v_y

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #34 on: May 10, 2012, 11:33:19 pm »
^ thats right sis, hanggang may dignity ka pa. then hold on to God. Sia ang gawin mong sumbungan.
if you need to talk let me know. :)

honey-ecclaire

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #35 on: July 24, 2012, 06:07:15 pm »
how are you na sis Ivy?

reb_woods072683

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #36 on: July 25, 2012, 03:06:00 am »
Ho are you sis Ivy? Ang sakit ng mga nabasa ko dito sa thread na ito. Though hindi naman ako maka relate dahil never naman nangyari sa amin ng asawa ko ito, i feel for you and for other GT sis who is currently in this situation.

IMO lang, it is hard to move on when you have a kid involved. Good thing wala kayong anak kasi kahit paano mahirap for you and for your child na mag move on. Para kasi sa akin, kung mangyari man sa akin yan, mahihirapan ako umalis dahil sa anak ko. Kawawa kasi talaga ang bata. Bata pa, broken family na, plus ayoko talaga ng broken family, kaya kung saka sakaling kakayanin ang maayos na usapan, yun ang dapat gawin. Pero syempre case to case yan sis.

I really hope you are happy right now and I hope that you are enjoying your life to the fullest. There may be down times, but sometimes feeling the hurt you once felt will make you realize that you did the good thing, of movin on. And always remember that we are hurt or rejected, we should always run to God, no one else. He made you feel that way so you can come back to him. His warmth embrace is priceless. God bless you sis Ivy.

i_v_y

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #37 on: July 25, 2012, 04:29:01 am »
how are you na sis Ivy?

hi sis. thank you for asking.

nung last week ng may, i went back home equipped with my desire to save the marriage in spite of him not knowing what i was to go home. i was so full of hope and patience and love. lot of things happened until 3 weeks ago, i  just started to become indifferent towards him. I keep remembering what aquacharly said, true enough there is no value in my love and forgiveness.

Last Sunday, I spoke to my husband about my decision to separate. He acknowledged it and hindi naman ako pinigilan. Im just counting the days off until the big move. I just need to settle some financial stuff here at home before i go.

Honestly, im happy about it, i am full of hope and excitement. I can now see my life after this unlike nung unang post ko dito. A lot of people started noticing that i look prettier.

Masarap lumaban kung sia lumalaban din pero hindi eh. I realized that i didnt need to fight for my spot because if i am important, he will make room for me. I deserve someone who will treat me like gold.

i_v_y

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #38 on: July 25, 2012, 04:35:56 am »
Ho are you sis Ivy? Ang sakit ng mga nabasa ko dito sa thread na ito. Though hindi naman ako maka relate dahil never naman nangyari sa amin ng asawa ko ito, i feel for you and for other GT sis who is currently in this situation.

IMO lang, it is hard to move on when you have a kid involved. Good thing wala kayong anak kasi kahit paano mahirap for you and for your child na mag move on. Para kasi sa akin, kung mangyari man sa akin yan, mahihirapan ako umalis dahil sa anak ko. Kawawa kasi talaga ang bata. Bata pa, broken family na, plus ayoko talaga ng broken family, kaya kung saka sakaling kakayanin ang maayos na usapan, yun ang dapat gawin. Pero syempre case to case yan sis.

I really hope you are happy right now and I hope that you are enjoying your life to the fullest. There may be down times, but sometimes feeling the hurt you once felt will make you realize that you did the good thing, of movin on. And always remember that we are hurt or rejected, we should always run to God, no one else. He made you feel that way so you can come back to him. His warmth embrace is priceless. God bless you sis Ivy.

hi sis salamat. i dont wish this to happen to anyone kasi mahirap talaga. i have a friend who is going through the same thing. difference lang namen eh sia ay devastated stage ngayon. yung stage na hirap sia, nasasaktan. ako naman, im in the stage na na accept ko na, na it is a dead end. Nakikita ko na ang horizon and it is beautiful.

God is good.  God will see me through. Feeling ko nga eh, ako lang talaga makulet sa marriage na eto. I believe that there are marriages that are not according to God's will. When i married my husband, desisyon ko lang to eh. I never asked God if he was His plan for me.

reb_woods072683

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #39 on: July 25, 2012, 05:00:43 am »
That is why sis, in everything we do, we have to consult God first and ask for his blessing. Now that you are going to a whole new life alone, or maybe in time with someone new, who will see your worth and will take care of you unlike what your husband did, ask God's assistance in everything you do. You have no idea what God can do to you and your "new life". Starting over is hard, but this is also the opportunity to right all the wrong in the past, and learn from the past mistakes, trying not to commit them again. Believe in yourself that you deserve to be happy and that you will find the right person that God has prepared for you.

Goodluck sis. I feel happy and sad at the same for you, I don't know why. Hehe..
« Last Edit: July 25, 2012, 05:02:43 am by reb_woods072683 »

 

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