CASH or GIFT?

[shygirlme]

^may PS kami ayaw umattend kasi wala daw sya pangreregalo pero nag insist kami kahit walang gift basta presence nya mahalaga. gumastos din sya sa susuotin nya at pamasahe kaya di na talaga kami humingi ng gift sa kanya. hindi din kami nag expect na malaki cash gift makuha namin. hindi naman kami nagpakasal for money. kahit nakalagay sa invitation namin we prefer cash may mga nagbigay pa din ng gift. nakakatuwa din pala mag open ng gift hehe.

[mikky21]

^grabe naman yung nagbigay na nga ng 500 tinawanan pa. May mga ganyan talaga. Ako nga may inaanak ako 1 week before ako sinabihan, parang ewan ko ba kung kapalit lang or what. natural hindi ako nakapunta. Whereas i have a friend na buntis pa lang sinabihan na akong ninang ako ng baby niya, 6 months before christening binigyan na ako ng save-the-date. Mararamdaman talaga kung pera lang talaga or gift ang habol. Kung sincere ba ang pagkuha or hindi. Haaay

[annamarie88]

^hmmmm...... Well, ako nagsabi lang ako sa mga ninang na baby ko na ninang sila siguro less than a month.. Kasi hindi ko pa maplano kailan at saan.... and I'm still weighing sino sa friends ko kukunin ko... The kumares I got for my kid ay yung mga close sa akin and for sure maguide si baby, mind you, yung iba walang mga work/working students.. Hindi rin ako nagexpect ng gifts, pero halos lahat nagbigay cash, yung walang work nagbigay malaki nagulat nga ako, sinabi ko kay hubby na sana hindi na lang nagbigay okay lang naman sana, baka nahiya because alam madami ako pera. Joke hehe

Back sa topic.... I say, to each his own.. Your wedding, your rules. 😜

[mikky21]

^hi sis i didnt mean to offend anyone. Im just talking about my 1st hand experience wherein naramdaman kong hindi sincere yung pagkuha sakin bilang Godparent. Though hindi naman ako mayaman para maging after sila sa pera/gift ko. Pero may nag-advice sakin na friend ko na dapat daw lakihan ko yung pakimkim (money na ibibigay) ko dahil may nasabi daw ang couple sa mga ninang/ninong ng 1st kid nila nung maliit lang daw ang naibigay na pera. So tama yung 1st instinct ko na hindi sincere yung pagkuha nila sakin based on the short notice alone. And that i proved nung may nasabi sila sa ninang na maliit lang ang gift. We are citing examples kung san nagiging issue yung pera or more of what the guests could give, defeating the purpose of why they are supposed to get you so. Im not saying my experience applies to all. And like you said, not just sa wedding but to any other occasions as well, to each is own.

[Purple_Power]

^may PS kami ayaw umattend kasi wala daw sya pangreregalo pero nag insist kami kahit walang gift basta presence nya mahalaga. gumastos din sya sa susuotin nya at pamasahe kaya di na talaga kami humingi ng gift sa kanya. hindi din kami nag expect na malaki cash gift makuha namin. hindi naman kami nagpakasal for money. kahit nakalagay sa invitation namin we prefer cash may mga nagbigay pa din ng gift. nakakatuwa din pala mag open ng gift hehe.

Yan rin ang concern ko kahit yung presence na lang di hamak na mas mahalaga compare to gifts. Just in our case naman kahit nagpa gift registry ako kaunti lang rin ang sumunod. But that is okay magaganda rin naman yung mga items na natanggap. Yet marami rin nagbigay ng cash gift.

[MS_JanDel]

This thread is really helpful kasi I'm planning to put in our invitation that if guests will give gifts cash nalang sana kasi sa province yung wedding and hindi namin madadala pabalik sa Manila. I think they will understand naman why we're putting it. It's not about para makabawi sa gastos kundi para lang mas practical. But anyhow, napaisip pa rin ako habang binabasa yung thread.

We have guests from manila who will attend and I told them kahit wag na sila maggift kasi gagastos pa sila sa pamasahe and sa hotel, masaya na ako an pupunta sila, their presence is their gift. If I compute yung magiging expense nila sa pagpunta sa kasal ko, baka X5 nung per head nila sa catering..hahaha

Sa entourage ko naman I ask them na sila na magshoulder labor ng gown nila and yun na gift nila for us. Good thing the girls are really close friends and they agree at excited din sila.

I guess the gifts come in all forms but for me mas maganda na yung vocal na din kung ano yung gusto mo matanggap, kung close relatives and  friends mo naman yung aattend maiintindihan na nila yun. 

[czarina1987]

just to share, we put in our invitation na as much as possible cash nalang, hindi verbatim yan ah..hahaha! maganda naman ang pakakasabi. pero may nagbigay padin ng gifts, wala pa ata kme nagagamit dun sa mga gifts and yung iba pinamigay nalang namin kasi hindi namin type

[Aftergl0w]

I honestly prefer cash since my fiancée and I are already living together and our apartment has all the stuff we need, except for a few home accents which I want choose and buy myself. I have a feeling that most of our gifts will be left in storage.

But I am very wary in including this in our invitation no matter how politely worded. When I hand out our invites, I want our guests to feel that we are not expecting anything except their presence. That's for me lang naman ha. If they want to give us anything, that would just be a bonus for us.

[Chili1113]

^Same here sis!! Of course everyone prefers cash hehe but I would be too uncomfortable to indicate it.

Actually I was even uncomfortable about including our gift registry cards (I have 2 gift registries, One online and one in Rustan's). I know including gift registry cards is totally acceptable naman, but I was dyahe to include 2 registry cards, because it was like screaming out lout "give us a gift!" But then my coordinator and friends told me it is ok to include both registry cards for the convenience also of guests.

Anyway having said that, we already got 2 gifts from our online bridal registry in Knotsandpans.com! Heheh we have hardly distributed our invitations but there are a couple of guests that already bought their gifts online. I am glad I did the online registry.

[fidelity88]

I want our guests to feel that we are not expecting anything except their presence. If they want to give us anything, that would just be a bonus for us.

Agree to this sis! we are now doing the layout of our invitation and we don't want to include it, as well. honestly kasi nahihiya ako sa ganun. haha. I want them to initiate na lang. Kung wala naman, okay lang din.

[whutup]

H2b and i prefer cash ad well but I agree with those saying not to put gift preferences (whether cash or in kind) on invitations. It's like saying, "Please come to our wedding. By the way, this is what we want..." If it's not okay to say this to someone in person, why would writing it down be? The best way, in my opinion, is to have your close friends and family spread the word about your preferences. That said, I don't judge others who do it naman, given how common it's become. I just would never do it myself.

I think our guests are something like 70% Chinese and I don't think I've ever seen a Chinese person give anything other than cash as a wedding gift hahaha so we're lucky enough to not have to *ask* for cash - understood na! For the others, I tell them we prefer cash if they ask.

[amethyst028]

^yes sis i'm pure chinese and we give cash for most occasions. kaya nga may "angpao" (red envelope) kame kasi sa lahat ng okasyon yun ang binibigay.

but for me as a guest kung nakalagay sa invitation "the couple prefers cash" i won't be offended. i don't think your guest will be offended kasi understandable naman dahil madami din nagastos ang couples. ang mahal kaya magpakasal. time consuming din bumili ng gift tapos pag hindi pa type ng couple e di sayang. pero hindi maiiwasan na may magbibigay pa din ng gift kasi culture na din iyan. pag yan na ang nakasanayan ng guest.

[Tubby]

I posted on this thread before we got married and looks like our "strategy" worked.

First - we did not put anything in the invite about cash preference but we told our friends when they. Our entourage actually helped us with this when people asked them. So in the end we ended with a lot of cash gifts and some Rustan's/Abensons GCs.

But we also registered for some items in Rustan's (I think around 14 only) and we put in some of the invite the registry card. We made sure that we will just give the Rustan's registry card to people whom it's dyahe to give us cash (eg. our workmates, people younger than us, etc.). And surprisingly all of our registry list items were given to us. Even our luggage requests. There was a couple of duplicates and we were able to return them to Rustan's. Rustan's gave us GCs in exchange of the gifts.

So for us...it's not one size fits all! HTH!

[FutureMrsU]

My then-fiance and I were moving out of Manila to the province so we actually indicated that should they wish to give a gift, cash was preferred. For practicality's sake lang.

[forumera]

Sa mga sis na ikakasal ano po gusto niyo mareceive na gifts? Ang budget around 1k pesos.

[cc1818]

I have concerns too on putting something in the invites about cash preference kung magbibigay man sila. My fiance and I agreed na wag na lang ilagay.

Pero kasi, I have this feeling na meron pa ring magdadala talaga ng non-cash gifts. May relatives din kasi tayo minsan na old school. Hehe!

May nabasa akong blog na they decided to put a quote like dahil overseas-based couple sila, they'd prefer cash kasi hindi naman nila madadala yung mga non-cash gifts lahat sa present country of residence nila - which is same case samin. Although sakin naman, kahit wag na sila magdala, basta makaattend sila ng wedding ko, OK na ko. Yung effort pa lang kasi na pumunta on a weekday wedding, maaappreciate ko na.

[marbleslice]

At first medyo hesitant din ako mag lagay ng wordings sa invite na preferred namin cash. So pinili namin yung wordings na walang "cash" or "money" or "monetary" rather, we preferred the term "small envelope" na lang. Sabi ng h2b ko kung di kami maglalagay on the invite, for sure may magbibigay talaga ng home stuff. Pero tingin ko, even if we put those wordings, siguro may iilan pa din magbibigay ng home stuff

[LilaFowler]

Kami may wishing well note sa invites. Kasi overseas kami saka we've been living together 2 years. Nag uumapaw na kami sa appliances.

Saka with my family, cash talaga ang regaluhan. Engagement pa lang nagtatanong na yung tito ko kung cash or frequent flyer points ang gusto ko for our wedding.( Points to use for our honeymoon.)

[skela96c]

Got married last year and we preferred cash. But if budget is 1k, maybe you can buy spa gc if the couple is into it.

[Missus O]

@forumera - Hi sis, we finished our wedding last June. I made the invites myself. I know that some do still consider it a major faux pas hehe, but I was one of the growing few who did include the gift preference in our invites.   Although I did not specify monetary aid. I put it in a poem form. Basically the gist of it was that we are very happy that they came, and gifts are not necessary. But if they wanted a gift, something small to pack in our luggage will do.  And then reminded them that we live abroad.

Despite this, most gave money, but there were still people that gave us gifts.