CASH or GIFT?

[Chili1113]

^ you already said you put a "cash poem" in your invites. Hence you already specified your preference for cash (which I personally would never do, but to each his own).

No need for a money dance or money tree, or box or unless it really is a part of your family/regional traditionm like if your wedding is in a province that traditionally does it. But otherwise it's too much  =) It's a wedding after all, and not a fund raising event =)

[j.adore]

It's a wedding after all, and not a fund raising event =)

Mismo!

Overkill na if you put in invites then still have money dance (unless you and your guests are from Batangas where I heard the money dance tradition came from and where it's really upheld).

I've attended some weddings like this so we just give the envelope during the money dance

Just my opinion though. For some other people this is perfectly ok.



Money tree/box is just so that there's a formal container instead of the bride or someone from the entourage just stuffing the envelopes in their bags.

If you already put it in your invites, it's understood and they will find a way to give it to the couple.

[rae]

^ Usually inaabot kapag picture taking per table.

[bachoi]

Magkano po ba ang ideal na cash gift? Rank and file lang akong empleyado at yung ikakasal ay mataas ang position. Salamat po.

[bagaholic_chewy]

^ IMO, if boss ang ikakasal, you're not required to give a cash gift na. You may opt to buy an in-kind gift instead or pool cash gift with other co-employees para mas malaki-laki ang amount (for example: 500 each tapos 10 people kayo so total 5k).

[j.adore]

Ya just give what you can. I don't think naman they would expect knowing boss sila.

I never bothered thinking who would give money or how much since the gift I really want is for them to attend and enjoy.

[rics]

I read in a newspaper article recently that the author finds it tacky to ask for monetary gift on the invites, no matter how sweet the wordings were. She felt like she is paying an entrance fee to be part of a celebration.

In general, i would opt to give cash. but a part of me would also like to buy something to commemorate the couples milestone. something they can use/keep for years to come and remind them of the happy occasion.

I somehow agree with the author that when I am asked to give cash in a wedding, I had this nagging feeling that its like I am paying for the food I'll eat, or pay partly for the DJ.

[Chili1113]

^ I super agree. I personally think that stating a preference for cash gifts is quite tacky, no matter what the circumstances are. My family and friends pretty much feel the same way also. It is simple etiquette. 
I would never ask for cash, or state it. I would rather not receive any gifts than indicate a cash preference on my invitation. Heheh it is a super faux pax in my circle of family and friends.

 However, when I do give gifts, I really compute how much they are spending per plate just as a basis, and decide on the amount/worth of what gift I will pick out in the bridal registry. 

[whatswithjuly]

thanks Chili1113.

it's a question asked by wedding coord if we'll do the money dance daw since we prefer cash as gift. i'm thinking yan ang ginagawa usually. from the start naman, we both don't like the money dance idea. so sabi ni wedding coord, pano daw ibibigay un money sa amin? maglalagay daw ba sila ng money tree. so i got quite confused kasi ang nasa isip ko..it's up to the guest kung pano nila ibibigay.

if i may just share, nakwento lang ni h2b sa akin..sa korea daw before you enter, required to give at least 2K equivalent in peso when you're attending a wedding. yan ang literal na babayaran mo ang kakainin mo 

[barbillie]

As a wedding guest, if it mentions in the invitation that the couple prefer cash, then I give cash. If wala, I give a gift card which they can use when buying in the department stores or appliance stores. I assume na mas okay yung gift cards kasi they get to choose what to buy lalo na yung mga items na hindi nila nareceive.

We, as the couple, preferred to have cash gifts and specifically mentioned it in the invitation as a poem. May mangilan-ngilan na nagbigay ng gifts and na-appreciate pa rin namin. After all, it's still the thought that counts. Mahirap lang iuwi kasi bulky usually ang wedding gifts eh sa Tagaytay pa yung venue namin. And naka-receive kami ng dalawang induction cooker, same brand pa! Hahaha! Naka-tabi lang sila ngayon sa house for future use.

Might as well open a bridal registry para alam ng guests mo ano talaga gusto nyo. At para ma-avoid din yung pare-pareho ng regalo.

[castledoll]

Magkano po ba ang ideal na cash gift? Rank and file lang akong empleyado at yung ikakasal ay mataas ang position. Salamat po.

one of our ninang sa kasal who attends all kinds of parties/ reception every weekend, she said na discreetly know how much per head ang catering and that's how much money you should give. If there's 4 people in your family who are invited and are going to attend, you multiply that by 4. But budget wise, kung ano lang ang kaya mo ibigay, I'm sure the couple will be happy and satisfied.

Frankly speaking, during our wedding, nung kame na lang ni husband at time to open the envelopes na, it didn't matter kung malaki or "maliit" yung naibigay. Ang importante, they took some time off and traveled many many miles just to celebrate with us. Relax. Sure ako na mas importante ang presence mo sa wedding nila at masaya ka for them kaysa sa gift mo.

[Chili1113]

^very true sis!! and thats why it isnt considered proper and gracious to specify a cash gift preference since the presence of the guest should be more than enough. However, as guests it is proper also on their part to make sure that they give a gift that will hopefully offset what the host spent per head. But if if the guest cannot afford it, that's fine and they should just give what they can =)

[Chili1113]

^sis for out of town/country weddings usually the guests really give cash, or will buy from the bridal gift registry and have it delivered to your house =) Nowadays, I have all my gifts delivered because I dont like carrying heavy gifts to weddings.

It isnt naman that it is wrong to ask for cash. Its just that strictly speaking it really isnt considered gracious to specify a gift preference. Actually these days, many people even opt not to even put the bridal registry card. Only by word of mouth will guests find out where they are registered (lahat sa Rustans lang naman din).

 

[z0z]

We prefer cash din, pero I wouldn't put in on our invites. We are both not based in the Philippines but I don't mind getting gifts, not everybody have money and sometimes, attending the wedding is also a gastos on their part. I mean sometimes they give a gift as a symbol, so for me thought still counts

[castledoll]

sure it's not gracious to "ask" for money as gifts. Minsan even with bridal registries, nakaka hiya din kasi ayaw mo na feeling obligated ang guests mo na mag bigay sa inyo. Kaya it really helps kung may wedding website. or yung mga entourage e sila mismo na ang bahala mag sabi kung may magtatanong.

And surprisingly these days, mas gusto ng guests kung ano preference ng mag-asawa. Less stress sa kanila kung alam na nila yung dapat ibigay.

[Tubby]

Hi, Sisters -

I am reviving this thread! Want your thoughts on this one.

We prefer cash but we also took into consideration some of our guests who might be hesitant to give cash. So what we did is we registered at Rustan's but we did not announce it to everyone and it's mainly for friends who can't attend but who are asking where we are registered. We also gave the insert card of Rustan's to people who will likely prefer gifts over cash so hindi sa lahat. BUT we also asked Rustan's to put in that "GCs are also accepted". For the rest - we asked family, friends and relatives to spread the word that we prefer cash.

Sa mga nag cash poem option...did you still receive gifts? How about duplicates? I have a friend who did not bother registering who got 4 microwaves!!!

[tiffany24]

This is what I also want to know, effective kaya yung cash poem on invites? My bestfriend got (mostly) cash gifts on her wedding but they were good with spreading the news, I don't know how but since she's my bestfriend she was able to tell me what she wants directly. Hindi ko lang sure kung paano yun naparating sa iba  Handa na kami ni H2B sa doble dobleng gifts if ever kasi may mga relatives kami na ganun yung nakagawian eh.. 

[yannuh]

^we used cash poem in our wedding invites and found it very effective naman. mga 5% siguro of the totla guests gave wedding gifts (in kind)  pero the rest, cash talaga hihi

[sparklingjewel]

^Tubby, we prefer cash also (bec our condo is already fully furnished) but we still registered with Rustans though we wont announce it or put in the card with the invite. Purpose lang of the registry for us is so that if we wont have duplicates if they decide to give a gift instead, at least may filter kahit papano. My friends though are relieved na cash nalang as they dont want to think na.

[mikky21]

What's with registering to Rustan's? Sorry im not familiar. And applicable ba yan if hindi sa manila ang wedding? TIA!