anong gagawin mo pag nalaman mong may kabit ang husband mo?

[ma_arts]

*****Mamayang gabi sa The 700 club ito ang topic:
Ano'ng gagawin mo kapag nalaman mo'ng may kabit ang asawa mo? Ano'ng gagawin mo sa kabit?

Mapapatawad mo ba ang asawa mo sa pangangaliwa niya? Sisisihin mo ba ang sarili mo sa pangangaliwa ng asawa mo?

Samahan kami'ng sagutin ang mga tanong na ito sa isa na namang makabuluhang kuwentuhan sa The 700 Club Asia, alas-11 ng gabi sa GMA News *****
[/quote]

sayang I missed this! ngayon lang ulit kasi nakapagbasa..

[krienne21]

When my instinct kicked in that he's into someone else, I investigated. And I was praying to God that may he led me to the proof na hinahanap ko. Right then and there, I found what I was looking for. I had all the important evidences. When he got home from work, Binugbog ko sya. I was able to use my background in taekwondo . Then threw him out of the house. He was badly beaten that he's in fever for days dahil sa injuries nya.

But we already talked. It wasn't easy to get out of the marriage, and somehow, I still feel responsible to do my best to make the marriage work. Ayoko ngang yung kabit lang nya ang masaya, asa sya.
Nasa bahay na sya ngayon, nilalagnat pa din. All his sisters and his mom were mad at him. I hope he now learned his lesson.

[beatrize zuri]

ay naku, makikipag hiwalay talaga ko sa kanya  , bahala na siya sa sarili niya at puputulin ko na rin yung communication niya sa mga anak namin para tapos na talaga, wala ng sabi sabi wala na ring usap usap, basta pag na caught in the act ko siya yon na yon!

[gab54]

nung nalaman ko, i told him na mahal ko siya, at kung mahal pa niya ako, we will work things out, i told him pinapatawad ko na siya (kahit hindi naman siya humingi ng tawad), at humungi din ako ng tawad bec i know i also have my faults. afterwards, pinakita ko kung gano ko siya minamahal, nirerespeto, lalo akong naging sweet, gusto ko pag nag compare siya, mas maramdaman niya na lamang ang orig kaysa sa kabit. in the end, nalagpasan namin ang malaking pagsubok sa marriage namin, sa ngayon sobrang ganda ng samahan namin mas ramdam namin ang pagmamahal ng isat isa

[ma_arts]

Sis beatrize zuri, you can never tell when you're in the situation. same tayo at first, napaguusapan namin yun mga ganong bagay kahit petty talks lang that once I caught him, he knew the consequences, but when the situation came totally iba yung nagawa ko.

Sis gab54, same tyo ng ginawa. I've shown him how much he would loose if he'll do it again, i became a better wife, sweeter, more maasikaso, etc. Nakatulong yung realization that at some point that I also have fault for what he has became and what pushed him to do so. Now, relationship is so much better compared before. I can see also that he's happier with what we are now.

[kaycee0307]

Hmm pag nalaman kong may kabit sya.. sabihin ko quits quits lang kami at kukuha din ako ng kabit ko. Basta wag nyang papabayaan ang sustento saming mag ina.

[soulace]

nung malaman kong may babae partner ko I was mortified. sobra.. makailang beses nya ginawa sa akin yun pero makailang beses ko syang pinatawad. The other two gave up easily when I confronted them. Pero etong last one napakatigas ng mukha mga sis. as in inaway ko na sa [textspeak!] at messenger and yet she still goes on. She knows na me and partner are living together at she knows I'm pregnant pero pumayag pa din syang maging basahan ln.  What's worse is she has a love chold and she tried to get pregnant with my partner grabe parang sasabog puso ko mga sis nung nalaman ko yun. Ilang ulit kami nagkaron ng arguements about that girl pang 4th time na. 1st when I knew and got an instinct na may nilalandi sya I told him immediately na layuan na.. kesyo wala daw.. I just shut up. and think and wait for more evidences and observe. 2nd I called the girl and yun na nahuli ko na todo deny pa yung girl kesyo mgkaofficemate lang daw sila eh may himala na palang naganap ng mga moments na yun. todo deny din sya pero napaamin ko din.. he said he will stop daw.. again I shut up. when I asked he said nag iiwasan na daw sila ng girl sa office di pa pala natapos dun my 3rd time arguement pa ako pa ang nasisisi this time kasi super praning daw ako at nagtitino na daw sya.. then this recent event at 4th time. I totally [textspeak!] and humilliate the girl kasi sya mismo ang nagpapakita ng motibo eh. read her messages na she will drop by the office. na she wanna see my partner mga ganung bagay. grabe ayun na sumabog na ako. at ang ending ako may kasalanan kasi nagtitino na daw sya.eh kung nagtitino sya bakit galit na galit sya nung inaway ko yun girl. major major away at muntik na kami maghiwalay. nabasa nya din mga [textspeak!] ng girl towards me. nung napaamin ko sya sa lahat ng kasalanan nya ang sabi nya natukso lang daw sya at yun girl ang lapit ng lapit kaya ayun tinikman nya at etong babae naman umaasa na iiwanan ako ng partner ko for her.. I'm not sure kung nag uusap pa sila till now.  I told my partner na this is the last chance its up to him if he risk loosing us basta ako I did my very best. Pinaglaban ko sya.. I gave him my all para pag dumating ang worst part na pag inulit nya pa he will realize his foolishness and he can never have us back..  I have my own savings. I am planning to work after my pregnancy and di ako totally dependent sa kanya financially.. oo mga sis mahal ko kaya nagpapakatanga ako but kung paulit ulit na and the guy refuse to grow up its better to walk out of the relationship than suffer..

[justin3]

^promise sis ha? LAST na talaga yan ha? kakantyawan pa sana kita eh. imagine? 4th time?

i was in the Sex thread awhile ago where i posted sa topic about STD.

the topic here is: "anong gagawin mo pag nalaman mong may kabit ang husband mo?"

so, dagdag ko lang... para makakasiguro, refrain from having sex with your hubbies not until you both consulted a doctor and had a series of lab tests certifying that both of you are STD-free. 

[babykat]

Honestly, I don't know.  Most of the time, I think i'll leave him or throw him out.  Especially since we don't have kids yet, but still, if and when that time comes, I'm still not sure of what I'll do.  Some things are easier said than done.

Additional query lang, what if you found he had a one-night stand with some bar girl or prosti kasi he got drunk with his friends?   Hindi kabit, hindi relationship but he did sleep with someone else.  What would you do?

Mga matatanda kasi and some friends of mine, minsan they tell us (please excuse the language) - di baleng  magpor kilo na lang, wag lang wholesale - implying that one-night stands are ok as long as it's not a relationship with another woman.  Then when i disagree, they tell me i have too high standards for my husband kasi.

[rianne_mallows]

^i dunno sis.. but maybe the oldies view the "prostis" as lesser evil than kabits lalo na kung drunk with friends kasi prostis are expected na bumigay agad..  kapag kabit kasi,  madalas, nanunuyo ang guy so intentional siya... saka may continuity kapag kabit kaya mas masakit for the wife.. kasi competition ang dating.. si prosti kasi pastime lang...

its still wrong IMO, pero for some nga, they do tolerate it

[wanderlust2011]

someone might get one of his appendages removed, and I don't mean his arms and legs.

[jpsv72]

ewan ko, mahirap sagutin, baka pabayaan ko lang sya, kasi there is a saying that a person will see your importance once you lost her parang ganoon, so I'll give him a chance to realize that. Siguro naman bago sila mamatay nung kabitch nya ma ri realize nya yon noh!

[soulace]

@sis justin3 - oo sis last na.. gigising na ako.. idonate ko na lang sya sa babaeng yun mukhang trip nya naman maging impyerno buhay nya eh so magsama silang dalawa may anak na naman yung babaeng yun sa ibang lalaki baka mas trip nyang buhayin ang hindi sa kanya kesa sarili nyang anak. pero after the holidays na mga sis ayoko magdiwang ang babae nya na magkasama sila tapos ako mag isa lang sa holidays. ayoko maawa sa sarili ko nun at ayoko humalakhak ang babaeng yun.tiisin ko na lang muna at pikit mata ko na lang na oobserbahan mga bagay2. magaling din kasing artista tong partner ko eh.pag may confrontation dinadaan pa ako sa drama.. hay naku tapos di naman magawang lumayo dun..

[mgeoffrey_88]

I don't know ano gagawin or magagawa ko if ever malaman or makita ko hubby na may kabit!!!!

[lemonade]

even before we got married, i made it clear to my husband that if he ever cheats on me, that will be the end for us. i will definitely leave him. hindi na baleng magtinda ako ng banana cue sa kalye, basta ayoko nang makisama sa kanya pag nambabae siya. yun lang.

[mitchymumay]

Mahirap sabihin na ganito ganyan gaya ng isa nating sis akailang beses na siya nagpapaka martyr yung iba naan hiwalay daw pero mahirap pag nasa situation ka na, kasi it takes 2 to tango di ba if gusto pa din ni guy or hubby dun sa kabit may problema talaga, ako i really cant say but first instinct ng tao agad is to blow up or get mad. Kaya ako gwardiya sibil ako sobra din mahirap na lapitin din kasi lalo na nasa position din siya sa office niya. Pero kahit noon pa nung naguumpisa pa dami na flirt na girls na minsan di niya alam being nice girls is different from flirting girls.

[snowyice]

if this happens to me doon na siya sa girl basta akin ang sweldo niya.

[glamorosa_09]

Bakit ko nga ba binackread itong thread? hehe... sabi nga sa Proverbs 4:23 "Be careful what you think, because your thoughts run your life." So dismiss, dismiss, dismiss.

Re: thread

Like what other sisses said, I'll just cross that bridge IF I get there. Sa ngayon dismiss, dismiss, dismiss. I will just focus my energy on striving everyday to be a good wife and pray for our marriage than think of the answers to this question.

Re:hidden savings

Magandang idea yan, proteksyon sa sarili. But applying Stephen Covey's 'begin with the end in mind principle,' hindi na lang. Imagining if I will be on my deathbed - and we all are gonna be there - I know I wouldn't be proud to tell my husband that I hid an investment behind him all because of doubt and lack of trust. Mamamatay ka na lang, binigyan mo pa ng sakit ng kalooban ang asawa mo.

Kung may mangyari mang hindi maganda, I know that God will provide. On cases like this, I choose not to put my confidence on earthly and material things because like human, it will all pass. At least I know to myself, that I trusted and loved, and that is the essence of life.

[jhenbreak]

Nice advice sis Glamorosa_09!
Ako, I also don't know what to do pag nangyari sa akin yon, pero as of this moment I don't want to think about it. Pero may naging friend ako who once told me to always be prepared kasi like her, she didn't think it will happen to her, her marriage was so ideal, kaya nung nangyari sa kanya yon, her world fell apart...she had nervous breakdown. 
Pero sa personality ko, pag nalaman kong may kabit hubby ko, the mistress will surely regret na nabuhay pa siya, haha! But never ever will I stoop down to her level, I'm still the wife after all! God will take revenge for me.

[mommyniuja]

Baka mapatay ko ang kabit niya pati siya... hehe! No other woman lang.

Naku wag naman sana mangyari satin na mahuli ang asawa na may kabit. Pero sa opinyon ko lang, pag nangaliwa ang asawa hindi lang naman sila ang may kasalanan, siguro meron din tayo pagkukulang kaya nila nagawa yon.