after break up, can we still be friends?

[broken_heart]

Has anyone ever been in this kind of situation, when the relationship came into its conclusion, both parties decided to be just friends? Nagwowork ba ito?

My bf and I broke up just recently (we both agreed to it), and we decided to be civil coz we work together. but then, outside work, we text each other.

Since fresh pa yung break up, I am still hurt and i think ganon din siya. He said he cannot just forget about me and i feel the same way.

Naguguluhan ako kasi I want us back together but I don't know how he feels. I have delusions na mahal pa rin nya ako. And at the same time, i have this thinking na if ever magbabalikan kami, better be friends first to build a stronger foundation. Pero if I do that, I am afraid he will find someone new, and I will regret not doing the first plan. Ang hirap!!

Sa palagay niyo? POV naman! Thanks!

[meisaia]

i don't get friends with my ex'es. because if i did, i can not totally move on and like you i will still have that hope that somehow he'll love me again and we will be together again.

and if it didn't happen, i'll be hurt again for the second time because of my own katangahan. the only way to be cured from any pain is to totally get rid of the cause of it.

[17arci]

you can, but not immediately. it takes a looong time.

[broken_heart]

i don't get friends with my ex'es. because if i did, i can not totally move on and like you i will still have that hope that somehow he'll love me again and we will be together again.

and if it didn't happen, i'll be hurt again for the second time because of my own katangahan. the only way to be cured from any pain is to totally get rid of the cause of it.

I used to say that i don't want to be friends with my ex. Kaya nga EX, eh di tapos na diba? But the problems is, I dont think that this is the end. Feeling ko pagsisisihan ko if i give up now.

[blackgreen]

We can still be friends, but it will take some time. We should heal first before jumping into another phase with him.

[weirdzz]

Hello sis, do you mind if I asked you anong reason nun break up?

[broken_heart]

^ i don't mind. We had a fight, about a girl, then we just broke apart. It was our first major fight. For the past couple of days, post break up, we've been texting and he explained to me that the main reason he broke up with me is our mile-long list of "differences", --religion, POV's, culture, interests only to name a few. We tried to work it out, thus prolonging the relationship.  A lot of things also contributed to that like having no time for each other because of work schedules and lack of communication, not because we were hiding our true feelings but because we couldn't understand or we constantly misunderstand each other. We're like different wave signals, our opinions sometimes meet, but they're mostly astray.

About the other girl, she's just a trigger. He cheated in a way that he started flirting with her and he apologized. He even called her telling her that he would avoid her. I don't want to raise any hopes up. The break up was just waiting to happen.

[mrs.S.]

Mahirap talaga yung effort to be friends after a break up, nang Yari na sa Amin ni hubby yan. And I also follwed my instincts , nakipag balikan Ako sa kanya even After nag break kami. Buti na Lang  no regrets talaga

[gurlzat03]

in my opinion, mukhang mahirap kung magiging friends agad kayo especially when the breakup is still fresh. my ex offered his friendship after we broke up, but I refused to accept it. kasi for me, time heals all wounds.. katulad ng nangyari sa inyo sis, you both feel that you still need each other kasi tuloy-tuloy pa din ang communication.. pero its your call, you won't be able to know yourself better kung masasanay ka na anjan sya palagi for you.. this is just my opinion. 

[broken_heart]

^Lagi ko kasi siyang nakikita sa work, kaya pag umuuwi ako, lagi akong napapaisip na makipagbalikan. Ang hirap.

[meisaia]

I used to say that i don't want to be friends with my ex. Kaya nga EX, eh di tapos na diba? But the problems is, I dont think that this is the end. Feeling ko pagsisisihan ko if i give up now.

hi sis. alam mo yung book na "It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken."? You could buy that.

its normal that there's still some hope. like a flicker of hope especially pag katatapos pa lang *we could even have that hope even after years pa nga e*. but sis, if you want to be friends with him, JUST BE FRIENDS. don't hope. in the end ikaw lang masasaktan eh.

[weirdzz]

thanks for sharing sis. malalim din pala ang reason kaya kayo ng hiwalay. Pwede din naman kayo maging mag friends pero matagal tagal pa yun, siguro give space muna sa isat isa in order to move on. Lagi naman tlagang may hope lalo if you still love the person pero kagaya ng napag desisyonan nyo hindi tlaga siya mag work. Space muna talaga ang kailangan, pwede din makatulong iyon to see the bright side of things at malaman kung tama ba talaga yun decision nyo.

[broken_heart]

I tried to tell him to reconcile and work things out. He said, he needs time. So i texted him back and said my final goodbye and letting him know that I am letting him go na for real. I'm not gonna contact him in anyway, since I lost his # already and blocked him in FB. So this is it, buhay single ulit like I have been for years.

[weirdzz]

Nice decision sis. Things will get better. Kaya mo yan...

[mommycute46]

You can be friends, but it takes a long time, at kapag nangyari yon hindi na kagaya ng dati. There would be limitations, hindi na pwede ang dating closeness, kung gaano kayo kaopen sa isa't isa or kung paano mu bigyang pansin ang mga feelings niya pero kapag nangyari 'to, it maybe because you love each other still  .

[princess_brat]

You can't be friends right after the break-up. It takes time and plenty of maturity

[iam_miel]

I tried to tell him to reconcile and work things out. He said, he needs time. So i texted him back and said my final goodbye and letting him know that I am letting him go na for real. I'm not gonna contact him in anyway, since I lost his # already and blocked him in FB. So this is it, buhay single ulit like I have been for years.

aw..same na same ata tayo sis sa part na toh..i also tried to get back with him but he told me he's confused & wanted to let me go na talaga kahit yung tina-try naming friendship kaya I also said he can let go na..kaso he texted me na he wanted to see me daw this friday samantalang nung Tues lang kami nag-let go..nabasa ko pa post nya sa FB na he's so confused..dapat na din ba akong bumitaw AS IN TOTALLY? super dami ng pinagdaanan namin kya siguro parehas namin ndi ma-let go yung isat-isa..help din po..

[gurlzat03]

^ hugz sis.. may i ask kung gano na kayo katagal before kayo nag-break?

My opinion is this.. we have to accept the fact na 'pag sinabing break, its already considered as broken. para lang din 'yang glass, 'once its broken, you can never bring back the shattered pieces in its real form... same with people.. people do change, pwedeng ang nararamdaman mo ngayon eh iba na sa pwedeng maramdaman mo bukas.. if you guys really love each other, for sure, kahit na walang communication, you can still feel na you deserve each other.. sa ngayon, my advice for you is to move on completely.. hindi mo kasi mare-realize ang mga bagay-bagay kung hahayaan mo pa din na may communication kayo.. i asked you at first kung gano na kayo katagal, kasi lately hindi na ko naniniwala sa mga super tagal na relationship. siguro merong iba na blessed na sila pa din sa huli, baka I'm still hurt kaya ganito pakiramdam ko.. pero going back to my advice (commercial lang po 'yung nararamdaman ko), medyo try to have separate lives muna and ask for God's guidance.. Sabi ko sa 'yo sis, 'pag na-realze nya na talagang mahal ka pa nya, gagawa at gagawa yan ng paraan para magkabalikan kayo and i hope it will be sweeter the second time around.. goodluck sis! i know how hard it is to move on pero you have to do it.. remember that this too, shall pass... 

[SAMSOONGET]

ginawa ko after ng breakup nag offer ako na maging  friends kame kasi parang di ko kaya na mawala sya sa buhay ko.. pero mali pala yun sis maling mali ako.. pero ewan ko sa iba pero sa akin mas lalong masakit lalo na kung oki sya na friends kayo tapos may kapalit ka kaagad sa buhay nya.. mas masakit talaga kasi nag expect ako na magiging oki pa kame... siguro tama mga sis naten pwde maging friends pero matagal na panahon pa, as in dapat oki na oki kana tanggap mo na wala na kayo. pero kung mahal mo hindi malayong mangyari na aasa kapa talaga.

[iam_miel]

15 months lang pero the happiest Ive ever been in a relationship..yung mga exs ko ndi ko friends pero itong last lang ang ayoko mawala sa buhay ko..yung story namin I posted sa break up stories/diaries & u would understand why its so hard to let go..pero tama kayo mga sis, he'll never know my true value kung hindi ako mawawala ng tuluyan sa buhay nya...Im always praying to God na kung kami talaga, si God na lang gumwa ng way for us to find each other again..Tnx mga sis!