no more kilig? dapat na ba umalis?

[airish_2]

8 years na kami ng boyfriend ko dumating din yung time na medyo natatamad ako, kaya what i did is i go out with friends gawa ka ng "me time" mo hindi yung puro kyo palagi i never cheat din.. i don't know, kasi kung may 2 akong boyfriend mas pipiliin ko na wala na lang stressful din kasi, gawa din kayo ng bagay na first time nyo lang gagawin.

[AILM]

Love is commitment and not emotion!

[meisaia]

^ sorry but i disagree.

Love is definitely an emotion. Relationship is the commitment.

You could love a person kahit hindi ka committed sa kanya.

[thebluecook]

Hello all, I knindof have a similar problem. So the thing is, my boyfriend still feels kilig sa akin (with what I do) like surprise him on dinner dates, toys, random notes, pero ako kasi di na kinikilig pag siya yung gumagawa nun. Ang sama pakinggan pero ganun talaga e.

Nasanay na lang kasi ako na may dinner lagi, or lunch, and lagi niyang sinasabi na thoughtful ako, etc. Sa totoo lang nagguilty ako everytime he says that kasi hindi naman talaga ako thoughtful sa tingin ko, it's just that, nasanay na lang talaga ako sa ganun.

Don't get me wrong, I love my boyfriend, we still have fun, pero lately naiisip ko na parang bffs na lang kami instead of bf/gf. Dati naaalala ko na pag dadarating siya ang laki agad ng ngiti ko, pero ngayon, wala na lang. I know, siguro nasa comfort zone na talaga kami, and di na ganun nageeffort para sa cheesy moments.

Nahihirapan lang ako ngayon at di ko sigurado kung dapat pa ba akong magstay sa relationship or hindi na.

[IronLady]

same sitch.. hay.. lately napapansin ko ako na lang nage-effort. at dahil ako na lang, sya hindi na, wala ko mafeel na kilig. ni hindi ko mafeel na importante ako o namimiss ako ng tao. hay. alam ko nararamdaman ko lang to kasi somehow nagi-expect ako e, na kahit pano pakita nya yung ganto ganyan. hay. pero wala talaga. pero alam ko din naman na di ibig sabihin non di na nya ko mahal. o na ayoko na din dahil wala ng kilig dahil maxado na nasanay sa mga gnagawa as bf gf. gusto ko man gumawa ng mga bagay na kakaiba para magspark pa ang relationship namen, wala naman akong makitang cooperation o enthusiasm mula sa kanya kaya ayun nadidisappoint lang ako lalo.. hay ang hirap.. di naman nya kelangan gumawa ng sobrang kakaibang bagay e. yung pakiligin lang sana ko with words other than ILY, na dati nasasabi naman nya ok na e.. nagaway pa kami lately kasi pinaparinggan ko na magdate naman kami kagaya ng dati, yung sya yung mamimili ng place, tapos romantic. hehe. bottomline lang, hindi ko mafeel na love ako kasi lahat default mode na.. dunno what to do or think na.. hay!

[bear_27]

what if sa sobrang tagal nyo e iba na [textspeak!] ngpapasaya sayo? parang hindi na sya [textspeak!] iniisip mo? or [textspeak!] na [textspeak!] dating sayo [textspeak!] mga efforts nya.. kailangan bang sabihin sa kanya [textspeak!] tutuong nararamdaman mo kahit suicidal sya?

[simplyme]

^ sometimes i get bored too with my hubby, 2 lang kasi kami wl pa kami baby. minsan masyado syang busy playing games or watching mga naruto and the likes ... ginagawa ko nagpapapansin ako para di tuluyan na hindi na kami magpansinan sa isat isa. Or inaaya ko sya lumabas para bonding - at least once a week kain sa labas, do the usual things we do together before. Siguro over familiraity na din minsan kaya we get bored in a relationship, but it's up to us how to bring back the liveliness of the relationship :-)

[belleclara]

i can sense that you guys might be getting used to being together. feel free to give yourselves space to try new things then eventually share that "new" together. i believe that you guys are still in love with each other, dumadating talaga ang ganyang time sa isang relasyon. stay inlove! 

[Serena.]

"di ako inspired sa kanya for some reason"


Hmmm, dito ako napaisip sa sinabi mo. Parang wala na atang thrill ang relationship nyo. Do something to add spice in it. Kapag pinatuloy nyo pang ganyan, magkakasawaan na lang kayo sa isat isa e.

[JHAZbewithyou]

Ndi naman.. Give another chance for both of you.

[phoebe1811]

no. siempre sa umpisa puro kilig. pero as years goes by it'll slowly tamed...or fizz out.
this is what u should do..you must make it work and sustain it. relive the things you do
when you're starting pa lang..the reason bakit mo siya nagustuhan and the things you'll do to each othe nkaya napamahal kayo sa isa't isa. its a joint effort and you'll have to communicate well para
aware kayo kung ano bang kulang.

[nicoletta]

I feel the same way about my ex/ bf.  I don't feel kilig anymore when we are together.  I don't know if its because we always see each other or we are in that point na comfortable narin talaga kami sa isa't isa.  He doesn't surprise me din kasi, we are doing the right thing for both of us, we try to make the right decisions for our relationship and the future, but the spark is no longer there.

I also have an issue with his sister who is very rude during Sunday dinners.  It came to a point that I already feel hatred towards her.  Contributory din siguro ito sa mga nafeefeel ko.

[chrisann]

being in a relationship isn't always a bed of roses. at some point, these kind of feelings do calm down. pag walang kilig, it doesn't mean love is fading. if kilig is your indicator of a "good" relationship, then you might want to start looking at other (more important) aspects of your partner and your relationship. think about couples who are together for 20 years or so. it is but just normal na mawala ang kilig. keeping the flame alive is the name of the game.

[redsh0es]

agad agad ito? haha wag naman sis.. there's no reason to say goodbye kung meron kayo commitment sa isat isa

[Kriman]

  baka di mo na sya mahal? just be yourself

[stebsy]

You don't let the relationship take its own course without the mutual desire of both parties to nurture it. Think outside the box. Do something different. Go to night outs together and try role playing. Like both of you are complete strangers to each other. Spice the relationship a bit. And yung matter of trust sayo na rin nangaling na matagal na yun.

May point talaga in every relationship na ganyan. Sabi nga nila parang sawa na. But no. Kulang Lang sa "oomph" hehe! Be spontaneous .

[karmark16]

me and my bf are together for almost 6 years na and we live together, there are times din na nawawala ang kilig factor, siempre super familiar na kami sa isat isa at halos nauubusan na din kami ng bagong moments, nevertheless, hindi nawawala ang HUMOR sa relasyon namin, para lang kami magbarkada pag nagaasaran at tawanan, si bf kasi super komedyante kaya ganun. I think na oks lang kung paminsan minsan nawawala ang kilig factor pero dapat may pambalanse na laughter, kasi nga how can you imagine spending your life with someone na super seryoso at hindi marunong tumawa? ang hirap naman siguro maging ganun habangbuhay.

[chemarie]

2 years and 6 months na kami ng bf ko, hindi na ako sweet sa kanya pero sweet pa din siya sa'kin. Hindi ko na kasi nafifeel 'yung kilig e, pero alam ko na siya na talaga. Hinahanap ko lang [textspeak!] kilig noong unang nagsisimula pa lang kami.

Yes, ako ang may problema, pero alam mo 'yung kahit anong gawin niya di tlaga ako kinikilig.


I still love him though.

[ri-anne]

at some point naman talaga, nawawala ang "kilig"... kung yung iba 2 years, nawawala na kilig, imagine na lang mga couples na 10 years and more diba...
pero pwede pa rin naman bumalik-balik every once in a while ang "kilig-kilig" na yan, basta mag-make ng effort yung couple ....
ganyan naman ang relationship. Pag inaalagaan, naggrow.. Pag pinapabayaan/napapabayaan, nasisira...

[hotminty]

^korek sis, ang love kasi pag may effort kang ginawa, the better outcome,especially kung worth saving and kung hub na, why not make the kilig moves, baka makigaya pa siya