Jealousy, nakakasira ng relasyon

[dulcette]

me me me im super selosa!! nako makita ko lang nakatingin sa ibang babae naiinis ako. but im very moody and lately we've been trying to talk more. he understands naman na yung case ko kasi i explained to him so now di na sya nagagalit. i know he loves me very much pero ewan, my jealousy is innate. 

[lonelymiss28]

nakakasira ng relasyon ang selos kasi parang wala kang tiwala sa asawa mo pag ganon...not unless nakita mo talaga ng harap-harapan....ibang usapan na yun!

[bubbles_sandy]

if the guy will not give you reasons para mag selos
im sure wala din mgseselos sa atin.

[hedonista]

bubbles_sandy - agree ako sayo sis.

i tried not to get jealous pero pag may dahilan eh walang kaabog abog
like the other day nakipag kita sya sa babaeng pinagseselosan ko ng bongga kasi daw the girl needs "kadamay" niloko kasi sya ng live in partner nya.

sobrang layo ng place namin sa the fort and umeffort si husband so ang ending world war 5. selos ako pero mas malala kasi ginawa nya nakipag meet at di sinabi sa akin, napilitan umamin kasi nagwala na ko coz he is 6 hours late umuwi and walang diaper at tubig anak nya inuna pa yun

i think pag ganito valid at majujustify ang selos.

[Jam Haliparot]

Kung hindi ka naman mahilig magduda but you feel he is cheating, he probably is. So mas maganda if you talk to your bf and nicely ASK what it is that's bothering you. You will feel naman if he's telling the truth. This will be healthy for your relationship. ASKING NICELY FIRST BEFORE YOU NAG or MANGBINTANG
_________________________________________________________________________
 
Hindi rin ako selosa, at pa-sweet ako  pg nagseselos as a way of nagpapalambing lang ako. My BF is not a socialize person mas lalo na nung sila pa nung X niya, so nung naging kame i wanted him to be free meeting new group of friends, natutuwa nga ako when his friends compliment his company - he's kind, so fun to be with. I even encourage him to drink with his team mates para magkapg bonding sila.  At he's the type of guy who's faithful & honest. I know him very well cause we were once bestfriends, and now we're living together.
 
Kaya nga when he lied to me on where he was after work, is he drinking with his friends at sino mga kasama niya which is very unusual of him lying. In which on the 1st place ok lang naman saken if he wanted to hang out. Feeling ko tuloy he's hiding something, i told him what's bothering me & he said it was nothing he even promised not to lie again. But again he lied for the 2nd time. I hate arguments, pero habang tumatagal nauuwi na kame sa away. So i decided to break up with him, ano pa sense ng love if there's no trust & honesty. I even told him "hindi na kita ganoon kamahal" when i was so drunk, i don't even remember that i told him that.
 
He decided na we start all over again when he noticed unti - unti nako nawawala sa kanya, he admitted na he treated me like his X kung gano ka-possessive ng X niya sa kanya ganon din ang assuming niya saken kapag he's with his friends. Bakit ganon, i ask & talk to him nicely nothing happened umabot pa kame sa ganon para lang ma-realize niya I AM NOT HIS X.

[bubbles_sandy]

we almost part ways kasi selosa daw ako.
so i told him bakit mo add sa fb yung girl
kung wala ka interes, buti sana kung close
friend.the nerve, sana maging sensitive na man minsan

[imyourangel]

Aminado akong selosa. And I hate it. I want to trust him. Maybe I'm just scared to trust again kaya ganito ako ka-praning. What do I do??

[trfg888]

ang hirap iwasan ng jealousy but I am honest to my bf and I always tell him pag nagseselos ako para he would assure na right away.. I think yun ang solution - ASSURANCE from our partner..

[fidz]

jealousy breaks any kind of relationship. as long as you are confident of who you are, what you feel and what you have, you will never feel this.  no offensement, minsan kaartehan nlng ng iba yan para lang mapansin. do things to love and be loved.

[pinkberries]

minsan inisip ko, hindi ako selosa.... pero baka nga naman selosa ako, hindi ko lang alam.  what i notice is, i turned indifferent kapag may hindi ako nagustuhan sa ginawa niya.  that alone can kill the relationship, nawawalan na ako ng gana.

[hedonista]

amethyst028 - thanks sis. may natutunan ako sayo. lalo na ngayon we are husband and wife and there are still instances na nakakaselos and di maiwasan na mauwi sa away.

this weekend i will pamper myself to get off jealous thoughts. the woman i was jealous with said in her snide remark in one social networking sites called me pathetic. and i know that i am not. i shall boost my self esteem and just prettify

[agape]

@hedonista

It's not jealousy itself but what you do with jealousy. As amethyst advised, turn your jealousy into positive actions, reactions instead of negative. It may be hard but with practice of self-control, you can do it. As for her calling you pathetic, I can relate to your situation, I replied to your other thread. Don't believe her, she is the one pathetic because she's the 'damsel in distress', not you. Whatever happens, wag mo pabayaan sarili mo, show them that you are the better choice.

[hedonista]

Agape and amethyst: Thank you 

[IamDzeybi]

True! Based on experience. A year ago kasi He had an affair with his office mate. But when I found out, they part ways na. But until now I keep on thinking if nagkikita pa sila sa office. Even if sa ibang floor na ang cube niya. And whenever ma-late lang siya ng uwi or text inaaway ko na and I kept on mentioning that girl na maybe she is with him or what. Then mag aaway na kami. And He dares me to text his office mates kung umaalis ba daw siya ng place niya at ask ko daw what time siya umaalis. He even insists to check his phone kung may bawas na load or yung call durations, etc. Well, He's confident. Maybe I was a bit paranoid. Or totally paranoid. He said na they don't see each other anymore. No more communications whatsoever. Oh how I wish na lumipat nalang ng ibang work yung girl. Para hindi na ko nagiisip ng nega. lol

[hedonista]

^ true! nakakaparanoid na saka mahirap ibalik ang trust pa ganon.

[soLaris]

girls won't get jealous kung wala naman talagang basis ang pinagseselosan. minsan kasi sa mga lalake (not all) may mga moves na parang sa kanila wala lang pero sa mga gf nila, nakakapagselos na. nakakasira talaga ng relasyon ang selos pero dapat maging sensible naman ang pinagseselosan.

[timetraveller]

Me, I'm super selosa pero I know how to hide it and control it naman. Hahaha. Pero if I feel that my ego's being stepped on, I really speak up. Ultimo likes sa facebooks sometimes pinagseselosan ko pa.

There's this girl kasi na 'crush' ng bf ko kasi kamukha ng ex nya. Tapos nila-like like nya yung photos and status nung girl. Tapos yung photos ko tsaka status ko di nila-like. Hmp. Todo selos talaga ako nun kaya inaway ko talaga sya, ginawa ko pang excuse ang PMS. Hahahaha. Nag-break kami, mga 4 hours lang.

I know he loves me very much, pero pag tinopak ako na magselos, sorry sorry na lang. Away talaga yan. Hahahaha.

[zarazan]

if your boyfriend said that others girls are hot, do i have the right to feel jealous? i dont want to appear insecure but i cant help but get hurt whenever he does these things 😔

Depende sis. If he's friends with the girls, then yes, I say you have the right to feel jealous. Iba kasi sa pakiramdam natin pag yung boyfriend natin nagagandahan sa friend niya. Nakaka-paranoid na sa onting usap nila, may meaning na sa kanya, diba?  Kasi looks naman unang tinitignan nila sa girls eh.

But if he says this randomly like hindi naman kialala. Like dumaan lang na girl or celebrities, then wag nalang masyado. Control nalang din.

[xhien]

i agree with this thread.. ako super selosa din kasi kahit siya din naman kaya quits lang di rin kasi maiwasan eh..lalo na sa mga girls out there na alam nang may asawa yung tao kung maka feeling close pa eh..epal lang! sa mga naging ex din niya pinagseselosan ko talaga kaya sa fb block agad yan! ewan ko ba minsan di ko talaga makontrol eh  napaparanoid ako masyado kakaisip..lalo na kapag lumalabas siya at nagiinom ewan ko na kung ano pinag gagawa nyan..kaya lagi nauuwi sa away

[det060403]

Agree!
Ako, im really selosa (based on my past relationships ha).
Pero sa bf ko ngayon, hindi niya ko binibigyan ng chance. LOL! i mean, hindi niya ko binibigyan ng reason para magselos ako on a serious note..even if he comments on other girls na eto ang ganda or eto ang sexy... or even if he keeps on adding random girls on FB... parang wala lang! Hindi ko mafeel na dapat may ikaselos ako. We joke about it, like sabihin niya he's pogi and ang daming nagkakandarapa sa kanya  ... (ampf!) isang matinding "ganon" plus suntok lang yun and then we'll just laugh about it.. Ganon lang! pampataas ego lang! pagbigyan ko nalang! hehe! kesa pagselosan ko at pagawayan lang dahil napakababaw at wala namang basehan.