After discovering that he cheated, how did u move on? ok pa kayo or hindi na?

[eimerej5]

I want to know what did you do after you discovered that he cheated on you and what did you do to move on?

Is your relationship still ok? Are you still together?

Do you still feel the pain of what happened?

Do you still trust him after that? what did you do to bring the trust  back?

do you still feel that maybe he is still with someone else or still with the old sl*t that broke your trust and faith in him?

Share your experiences and thoughts about this....


well here is mine:

 I still do feel the pain and sometimes feel that there is still something going on... I don't know what to think and do about it... I hay.... 

You can't blame me.. they are together everyday.. officemates sila... the same department... and the thing is i sometimes check our phone statement and i can see if they texted eachother or if the girl text.. but sometimes there are deleted msgs... o d b, sino ba naman ang hindi magiisip.. bakit niya need i-delete yun kung wala lang yun....

And before lagi sila nagtetext pero when i ask him about her and his msgs to her naging madalang na... then almost wala na... now, meron pero he already erased it... I know that baka ng-iisip lang ako ng ganito dahil of what happened before pero like what i said the trust had been broken and masisisi ko ba sarili ko kung i can feel that something is up... silent but there is something.. pede naman hindi magtext they can use the company phone to call where extension phone she is, or use their personal company email address to msg each other or ym sa office... there are so many freaking ways to communicate talaga...

minsan gusto ko siya tanungin pero ang sasabihin lang niya matagal na yun... Last Jan ko lang siya tinanong about her.. wala pa nga 1 taon eh.... hay ewan ko ba... ang hirap ng ganito...

[lulay23]

WHAT I DID, AFTER DISCOVERING THE BETRAYAL:
 I left my in-laws house and got my own place together with my kid..although nauna cia umalis ng bahay...and never nia pinaalam until now kung san cia nakatira..

WHAT DID I DO TO MOVE ON?
Trying to move on..not totally pa..mine is still fresh..9 months pa lang..and we are together for 11 years..

IS OUR RELATIONSHIP STILL OKAY?
Civil..he calls/text kung ok ako..ako..one liner na sagot lang..oo..or hindi...i don't ask him kung ano ginagawa nia or kung ano pinagkakaabalahan nia...if he ask about our kid..sinasagot ko...

DO I STILL FEEL THE PAIN?
Sobra...masakit pa din up to now...i never saw it coming...alam mo yung 11 years of your life na magkasama kayo (7 years as GF-BF then 4 years married) and no major arguements until one day naguluhan cia and asked for SPACE..tas yun na..it goes all down to the drain..and later on ..malaman ko na pinagpalit ka sa isang babae na 2 anak..sa magkaibang lalake...ganun...tas mababalitaan mo pa na they don't care kung sino makakita sa kanila in public places...pinili nia ang magulong buhay...or i guess minahal na nia yung girl para ipagpalit kame.

DO I STILL TRUST HIM?
Trust is something to be worked for...gaya ng respect it should be earned.

DO I THINK HE IS WITH SOMEONE ELSE NOW OR THAT EX KABIT?
I think they are still together..kahit lage nia sinasabe na hindi sila...no commitment pero yung ginagawa nila is gawain ng couples.

SHARE MY THOUGHTS ON ALL THIS...
Acceptance..masakit kung sa masakit..lalo na kung di mo akalain na gagawin syo...pero you have to fight...mahirap mapag iwanan..sooner or later lahat ng tao..nakapag move on na..and you don't want to be stuck with that situation na ikaw na lang ang hindi nakaka move on.

Kung may pagkukulang man tyo or pagkakamali..it is not  enough to betray our trust...at kung ganun man...sobrang napagbayaran na natin yun sa sakit na pinaramdam nila.

PRAY...i'm not religious..i don't go to mass very often pero i know na everything happens for a reason...i always ask for strength to accept this situation kase may daughter ako who draws strength from me.

Take it one day at a time..you don't have to rush yourself..this too shall pass :-)

[iluvmysoldier]

2 years into our relationship i found out na may nililigawan siyang nurse na anak ng mayor sa isang malayong lugar sa samar. although sabi niya wala daw (?) nangyari sa kanila, and the girl even had the nerve to contact me para sabihin na wag akong magselos dahil it was nothing serious daw..galit na galit parin ako..sinunog ko lahat ng gamit niya...as in lahat ng pinagipunan niya sunog lahat.

matagal ko siyang hindi tinanggap..sobrang sakit for me kasi natraumatized na ko dahil sa wlang kwenta kong tatay na akala mo mauubusan ng babae sa mundo. kaya sobrang sakit talaga...nakita ko kung pano magsuffer mom ko..ako lang ang nasasabihan niya ng problema kasi only child lang ako..kaya alam ko kung gano kasakit lokohin ng mahal mo...

ang mali ko lang, yung galit ko ginamit kong motivation para gumawa din ng mali...oo tinanggap ko na siya after a few months..pagkatapos non ako naman ang nagloko...4 silang pinagsabay ko...pero hindi ako naging masaya..feeling ko napakap*ta ko that time... sobrang dumi ng tingin ko sa sarili ko...

that was 3 years ago...ngayon ok na kami..natutunan kong magpatawad...never na siya nagloko...do i still feel the pain? everytime na naalala ko sobrang sakit... do i still trust him? siguro..pero hindi na mawawala yung kahit konting doubt...takot na ko eh... 

[kcjane]

Fresh pa [textspeak!] sa akin kahapon ko lang nalaman na may affair ang husband sa co-worker nya. Masakit talaga.Kahit na dinedeny nya i know something fishy is going between them. Now di ko alam kung aalis ba ko ng bahay nila dahil wala naman talaga akong mapupuntahan. Di ko talaga akalaing magagawa nya sa akin to.

[michipoo]

Fresh padin ang pain. To think na nagcheat siya saakin, hindi ako makapaniwala. Di ko matanggap. And I still don't know how to move on. Nakakainis yung binigay mo buong tiwala mo tapos ganun? napakahirap ng magtiwala ulit. AT higit sa lahat ang sakit yung pride mo natapakan, na iniisip ko siguro habang kaaffair ni bf yung babae tinatawanan ako ng babae kasi wala ako kaalam alam sa nangyare.

I read this in tumblr. Di ko alam kung tama pero somehow nakakatulong sakin.

STAY MAD AS LONG AS YOU CAN. BECAUSE ONCE YOU’RE NOT MAD ANYMORE; IT HURTS. IT HURTS LIKE HELL AND ONCE IT HURTS THAT BAD, YOU CAN’T MAKE YOURSELF MAD ANYMORE.

[babyhon19]

___

[luckyfernz]

I want to know what did you do after you discovered that he cheated on you and what did you do to move on?

i kept myself busy with the things i want, i made to focus with the dreams that i want to fulfill without him in it so it will not be that painful to me, so little by little, day by day, the hurts gone. it was also the time that i watched The Secret by Rhonda Byrne couple of times to help my broken heart be fixed, and it was fixed emotionally.

Is your relationship still ok? Are you still together? WE ARE NOT ANYMORE TOGETHER, AND WE DON'T TALK THAT MUCH, WE SPEAK ONLY WHEN THERE'S A PROBLEM WITH YOUR PAPERWORKS OF OUR MARRIAGE

Do you still feel the pain of what happened?
AFTER 2 YEARS AND 10 MONTHS NOW, THE PAIN HAD SOMEHOW VANISHED FOR I CARED TOO MUCH OF MYSELF NOW.

Do you still trust him after that? what did you do to bring the trust  back?
I DON'T TRUST HIM ANYMORE THAT IS WHY I LET HIM GO EVEN IF THE LOVE WAS STILL THERE AT THAT MOMENT.

do you still feel that maybe he is still with someone else or still with the old sl*t that broke your trust and faith in him?

HE IS STILL WITH THE OTHER WOMAN WHO HAVE 5 KIDS FROM DIFFERENT MEN, THEY'RE BOTH AMERICANS BY THE WAY.

Share your experiences and thoughts about this....

IT WAS HARD AT FIRST, BUT LATER ON I REALIZED THAT I LACK THE LOVE THAT MY OWN SELF WANTED, SO I SPOKE TO MYSELF AGAIN, OVER AND OVER AGAIN JUST FOR ME TO KNOW WHAT'S REALLY THE PROBLEM WITH ME WHY MY EX HUSBAND LEFT ME.  BUT WITH THIS INCIDENT IN MY LIFE, I HAVE DEEPLY KNEW THE DEEPEST PART OF ME.

[hopelessromantic]

I want to know what did you do after you discovered that he cheated on you and what did you do to move on?

-what did I do?I asked him why he cheated on me,and he told me everything,as in EVERYTHING ha.wala siyang dineny sa akin.he even admits na mas mahal na niya yung girl kesa sa akin(that time ha) at hindi na niya alam kung mahal pa niya ako.Next,I did ALL my best to win him back,to make him realize my worth.kahit alam ko nun na may relasyon pa sila.minsan napapagod ako gusto ko nang sumuko pero alam mo yung feeling na parang may nagsasabi sayo na wag kang susuko.

Is your relationship still ok? Are you still together?

-Never better!nag level up yung relationship namin.nagmature kungbaga.

Do you still feel the pain of what happened?

-its been a year na rin.honestly hindi na.siguro nakatulong din yung sinabi niya yung lahat sa akin.syempre napakasakit nung una,pero ngayon nalulungkot lang ako pero hindi ko na mafeel yung pain.

Do you still trust him after that? what did you do to bring the trust  back?

-YES.hindi naman sa nagpapakatanga ako.pero kusa yung feeling na pagkatiwalaan ko siya ulet.we talk everyday,lahat ng nangyayari sa amin,kung ano mga iniisip namin.we bond and bond and bond!

do you still feel that maybe he is still with someone else or still with the old sl*t that broke your trust and faith in him?

-NO...confident ko noh? LOL

Share your experiences and thoughts about this....
It helps talaga yun nagpakakumbaba ako(kahit ako yung nasasaktan).some may think na napakamartyr ko,well it works sa amin.kasi i made him realized kung ano talaga ako sa buhay niya.na sa akin siya magiging masaya(well,sabi niya ha).pero syempre nasa partner mo rin yun.if he is willing to work things out and to bring back your trust,he will do anything to make you feel secure and love,hindi sa paraan ng pagsisiningaling ha.mararamdaman mo naman yun e.

[maiandra]

Me too, kcjane, as in kagabi ko lang nalaman, kaofficemate din nya. Sobrang naging martyr na ko to the point I was thinking of transferring to his job so I could check on him all the time. I was such a martyr and too mabait. I still wanted to work it out, remind him we fell in love pero he doesn't want to work it out anymore. I wanted to confront the sl*t so badly, but I just remind myself I'm the netter person.

Sobrang sakit, just to throw out 6 years of marriage and promises.

I plan to move out with my kid today and go back to my parents.

Oh btw, can we actually report the "other woman" sa HR ng work nya and would they actually fire her?

[glamorosa_09]

^sis meron retrouvaile program thread dito... it's for couples on a rocky marriage...

don't you and your hubby want to try it out?

[lulay23]

MAIANDRA --- aww...sobrang sakit nyan lalo na alam mong kasal kayo tas nagawa nia..mine is 7 years as GF-BF then 4 years married...tas iniwan nia kame..i don't know if they are living in together..haayyy!!! relationships are so complicated

[longing]

I want to know what did you do after you discovered that he cheated on you and what did you do to move on?
When I found out that he was cheating on me, pinalayas ko siya sa bahay namin. Nagkahiwalay kami for four months but we're very civil then. He went back and I accepted him, believed on his promises but after a month of staying with us, he suddenly went cold again and one day, out of nowhere, for a very simple misunderstanding, he said na "walang mangyayari sa atin." so i simply told him, if that's what you believed, go and never come back again.

Is your relationship still ok? Are you still together?
not anymore.

Do you still feel the pain of what happened?
oh yes. especially that our common friends sees them together in public places (kapal ng mukha)

Do you still trust him after that? what did you do to bring the trust  back?
even if he went back before, trust was something that he needs to earn but apparently, hindi pa siya nakakagawa ng magandam, niloko na naman ako.

do you still feel that maybe he is still with someone else or still with the old sl*t that broke your trust and faith in him?
yes and what hurts the most is that he left me and our daughter who is only 2 y/o for a girl who is married with a son but not legally separated. so in effect, nag kabitan sila.

[evilwoman]

Oh btw, can we actually report the "other woman" sa HR ng work nya and would they actually fire her?

depende sis sa company e.. kung govt agency sila nagwwork, most likely masisisante ang girl. kung private, depende kung may policy silang for that pero most likely wala at hands off sila sa mga ganyang bagay. 

[neszreyes]

WHAT I DID, AFTER DISCOVERING THE BETRAYAL:
 I left my in-laws house and got my own place together with my kid..although nauna cia umalis ng bahay...and never nia pinaalam until now kung san cia nakatira..

WHAT DID I DO TO MOVE ON?
Trying to move on..not totally pa..mine is still fresh..9 months pa lang..and we are together for 11 years..

IS OUR RELATIONSHIP STILL OKAY?
Civil..he calls/text kung ok ako..ako..one liner na sagot lang..oo..or hindi...i don't ask him kung ano ginagawa nia or kung ano pinagkakaabalahan nia...if he ask about our kid..sinasagot ko...

DO I STILL FEEL THE PAIN?
Sobra...masakit pa din up to now...i never saw it coming...alam mo yung 11 years of your life na magkasama kayo (7 years as GF-BF then 4 years married) and no major arguements until one day naguluhan cia and asked for SPACE..tas yun na..it goes all down to the drain..and later on ..malaman ko na pinagpalit ka sa isang babae na 2 anak..sa magkaibang lalake...ganun...tas mababalitaan mo pa na they don't care kung sino makakita sa kanila in public places...pinili nia ang magulong buhay...or i guess minahal na nia yung girl para ipagpalit kame.

DO I STILL TRUST HIM?
Trust is something to be worked for...gaya ng respect it should be earned.

DO I THINK HE IS WITH SOMEONE ELSE NOW OR THAT EX KABIT?
I think they are still together..kahit lage nia sinasabe na hindi sila...no commitment pero yung ginagawa nila is gawain ng couples.

SHARE MY THOUGHTS ON ALL THIS...
Acceptance..masakit kung sa masakit..lalo na kung di mo akalain na gagawin syo...pero you have to fight...mahirap mapag iwanan..sooner or later lahat ng tao..nakapag move on na..and you don't want to be stuck with that situation na ikaw na lang ang hindi nakaka move on.

Kung may pagkukulang man tyo or pagkakamali..it is not  enough to betray our trust...at kung ganun man...sobrang napagbayaran na natin yun sa sakit na pinaramdam nila.

PRAY...i'm not religious..i don't go to mass very often pero i know na everything happens for a reason...i always ask for strength to accept this situation kase may daughter ako who draws strength from me.

Take it one day at a time..you don't have to rush yourself..this too shall pass :-)

sis, almost the same [textspeak!] ng story.. kami 9 yrs magkasama as bf/gf. di pa kami 1 yr kasal nagka third party na.. may asawa at anak pinalit niya samen ni baby.. as in parehong pareho sis..

[neszreyes]

I want to know what did you do after you discovered that he cheated on you and what did you do to move on?

nagstay ako muna, umasa na magiging ok tapos di pa rin pala sila tumigil so bumalik ako sa parents ko with baby

Is your relationship still ok? Are you still together? civil and nagtetext minsan for baby's concerns. we are not together. di nia nga kami pinabalik

Do you still feel the pain of what happened? yes. 9yrs kami bf/gf ala pa kmi 1 yr married.  gf na daw niya si girl bago kami kasal sana di na siya nagpakasal siya pala di ready.

Do you still trust him after that? what did you do to bring the trust  back? right now hindi na..

do you still feel that maybe he is still with someone else or still with the old sl*t that broke your trust and faith in him?
oh yes.. same work sila at magkasama pa din sila ng may asawa at anak niyang gf.. kabitan din..

[erriane]

WHAT I DID, AFTER DISCOVERING THE BETRAYAL:
away to the max.

WHAT DID I DO TO MOVE ON?
inaaway ko pa rin sya, asking stuff about the girl. nothing much on my part. sa part nya ang madami, kasi he tried he's best talaga to earn back my trust. successful naman sya. kasi sabi nya, hindi lang naman sya ang dapat gumawa ng way, kundi ako din, tulungan ko daw sarili ko..

IS OUR RELATIONSHIP STILL OKAY?
Yes, better than ever..less away..

DO I STILL FEEL THE PAIN?
minsan kapag nafefeel kong nauulit yung signs or acts nya when he's cheating.. laki kasi ng difference sa ugali at treatment nya sakin, so i'll know talaga agad..

DO I STILL TRUST HIM?
Yes.

DO I THINK HE IS WITH SOMEONE ELSE NOW OR THAT EX KABIT?
Nope. Let go kung let go sya.

SHARE MY THOUGHTS ON ALL THIS...
PRAY together. kung not possible, pray by yourself.

[maiandra]

MAIANDRA --- aww...sobrang sakit nyan lalo na alam mong kasal kayo tas nagawa nia..mine is 7 years as GF-BF then 4 years married...tas iniwan nia kame..i don't know if they are living in together..haayyy!!! relationships are so complicated

Actually ok na kami. I didnt move out anymore kasi he stopped me on my way out and said he wanted to talk. So we did and we're almost ok now. I promise I won't walk out again. To make it work this time around, we have to put in twice as much effort.

[lulay23]

MAIANDRA --- at least both of you wanted things to work out...it takes a lot of faith and courage..go girl...

neszreyes --- oo nga..kung di pa pala ready sana hindi na lang nagpakasal...haaayyy

[neszreyes]

^naku sis.. kaya di nia masumbat sakin na ako lang may gusto at excited dahil siya naman ang atat na atat dati.. never ko siyang pinilit as in! tas nun malapit na, natakot ata sa responsibility.. sana dba nagback out nalang siya.. naka pag move on na siguro ang beauty ko, may baby pa tuloy na nadadamay.. but the good thing about everything is my Angel..

[doratheexplorer]

ako din, nawalan ako ng gana.. nawala [textspeak!] excitement ko, parang [textspeak!] sweetness biglang nawala... bcos everything is being questioned whether if its still true or not.