Hi sis
holli_may.. how have you been doing? been reading this thread for some time now, i just couldn't comment talaga kasi i am the person who is deprived of power words. i don't know how to make someone feel good but i do sure have more than my 2 ears to listen. and i have my heart to feel. and ayun nga, i feel your pain. i'm not heart-broken, i can say i am the opposite. i'm happy pero hindi maiiwasan ang misunderstanding and pain in a relationship. i just have a vivid imagination lang talaga and what you have shared is just so clear in my imagination. and i feel the pain.
i'm also partially living with my guy. i say partial kasi it's not everyday because he still goes home from time to time sa place nya. but we're together most of the time. most of the stuff i have here in my place, if not for those i have bought before i met him, are conjugal properties. we bought them together (sofa, tv, new bed, washing machine, kitchen stuff, etc), the closet is filled with our clothes, the bed is for two persons, my dining table only has two chairs with it (sa sofa kakain pag may bisita lol), everthing in the bathroom is for two people. and more. when i read your story, ayun, i started to imagine things, and i just couldn't bring myself to think na lahat ng "for two" na bagay sa apartment na 'to eh magiging "for one" na lang. awww..
and i can relate to the part na may lumalanding officemate sa guy. it happened to us not just once or twice, i just can say na i'm lucky my guy happens to be understanding with how i feel sa ganung bagay. he would explain to the extent of what he could and it depends to me on whether i would understand or choose not to undertand. he would comfort me and assure me there's nothing to worry about. there's even one incident when he totally busted the girl. i told him hindi naman dapat ganun kabrutal, just ignoring the girl is enough for me and knowing na wala talaga sya ginagawang masama is enough na for me. kasi babae din ako and alam kong napahiya yung girl. eh sabi nya if the girl's actions daw could ruin a relationship (dahil nga i started nagging na), mas mabuti pa daw na ma-save agad yung relationship kesa masira ng ganun lang. i loved him more for that.
i didn't share my story para mang-inggit or anything sis. siguro my intention was to let you realize that in cases like that (may lumalanding officemate) and any other problems arising in a relationship, it shouldn't be only one person who's being strong, it should be both kasi relationship nyo yun. the fact that he wasn't strong enough to fix things means he's just not that man for you. if he was sick and tired of trust issues, then he should have done something about it rather than leaving. pero it was his choice and we couldn't question that. so if he chose that way, then you choose your own way. and that's to live life to the fullest without him. isipin na lang natin na sa kung sa isang maliit na problema nang iwan sya sa ere, how much more dun sa malalaking problems. i always tell that to my guy na sana hindi lang sa maliliit na problems kami intact. sana kahit sa bigger and biggest ones din. so far in more than 3 years i have him, we have surpassed bigger problems. sana more strength pa for another bigger problems on the way.
i hope you're really moving on and enjoying life as how you should be. wag natin sayangin ang time pagmukmok sa isang tabi. it helps to cry once in a while but let it be an outlet for pain to subside, don't look at it as a mirror reflecting the weak you, the loser you, the what-the-heck-happened you, cry to make you feel better and not bitter. then laugh with friends and family because they're the ones who will laugh with you til the end.
stay pretty!
