Afraid of Dating: Need Help :(

[kathie29]

It's been almost 2 years since my last relationship. My friends are encouraging me to start dating pero natatakot n ako makipagdate. d ko n din alam kung panu ang makipagdate. Help me please

[chengkii]

I think you need to look at dating NOT as a way to pressure yourself to get into a relationship. Think of it as a friendly date with whoever is inviting you. That will be a getting to know stage for both of you. You don't need to study how to date. Wala naman ata ganoon eh, unless you're out to impress the guy you're with.

Good luck!

[qt_ben17]

preparation   clothes, look, mindset. and of course, be yourself that's the best weapon. 

[krissys]

Sis, just relax. Think of it as a friendly date. Don't you have guy friends? Think of it as a casual gimik with your guy friends.

[kittypowerranger]

^ what happen ba on your last relationship? did it gave u ba reason to be afraid to date other guys or its just you? im sorry if im asking this i know its too personal pero i think i can contribute to us to have a knowledge on what ur going thru so makapagbigay kami ng advice sa iyo!

[ms. independent]

sis, for me, you can start on group dates muna. para less pressure. para enjoy and hang out lang. in a way, you're still on your comfort zone because you have your friends with you. then pag tumagal-tagal na, pwede na solo friendly date... goodluck!

[frozen]

i agree with you sis ms. independent..

you don't have to go alone. you need a buddy. someone who can cool down the pressure between you and your date.

this is what i always do..

[ms. independent]

^ me too! LOL.. pag kasama mo kase ang friends, para lang talaga hang out.

to TS, don't expect or pressure yourself too much na magkaron agad ng romantic date lalo na you feel uneasy..

[bolitas]

Isipin mo na [textspeak!] pupunta ka ng enchanted kingdom 

[luisacart]

I think the secret of dating not thinking of it as an "interview". lol As the others said, think of it as just hanging out with a friend.

[aquacharly]

It's been almost 2 years since my last relationship. My friends are encouraging me to start dating pero natatakot n ako makipagdate. d ko n din alam kung panu ang makipagdate. Help me please

Since you are rather apprehensive, do not go out on blind dates, even if arranged by well meaning friends or relatives.   Get to know the guy 1st in a group situation..

When you go out eventually on a date, look at it as just 2 adults wantiing to have a good time; to perhaps start a friendship  (good, clean fun ha  no hanky panky!)
He is just a Date!  Do not look at him and timbangin mo:  may BF potential ba ito?  Husband material ba ito?  Walang ganunan ha,  that will make you tense, and give him bad vibes.   hehe 

Just enjoy the time and activity... you should not feel obligated to put out nor be a performer to entertain him.  Walang ganong usapan ha.   

[junetwentythree]

Life is too short for fears like yours.

[pink_stardust]

ganito ako dati! di lang sa dates, pero naiilang talaga ako pag inaapproach ako ng guys. kaya siguro single ako for 21 years. best guy friend ko ang naging boyfriend ko kasi super comfy na ako sa kanya. pero medyo kabado pa din ako during the first few dates namin.

siguro sis, maybe try mo na lang group dates. less pressure =)

[k_heart]

Hmm, i actually hate dating. Feeling ko wala kaming pag uusapan ng mga guys. pero despite my fear or hate sa pagde-date, ang dami kong na-date na guys. almost lahat ng first date ko, may kasama akong mga friend na one or more than one. Kasi pag tipong ayaw ko sa guy, sisignal na ako dun sa kasama to make an excuse, sabay takbo.ha!ha!ha! At syempre, relax pag may kasama sa first date.
At ganito lagi thinking ko na, I don't even care what the guy thinks, im not there to impress him but he is there to impress me.he!he! at ayun, enjoy lang. Not a prospective bf or anything.

Dahil ganito ugali ko sa dating, alam kong serious ako sa future husband ko kasi after so many many years, nakipag first date ako sa guy ng walang kasama. Ayun, the guy is now my hubby.
I don't like blind dates. Usually,yung guy kilala ko na or may someone na nagpakilala na sa amin before.

[Girltalker2]

First of all, para at least hindi mo concern kung may mangyari sa iyo (kasi natatakot ka), mas ok sana kung makipagdate ka with someone na nirecommend friend/s mo. and of course, hindi kung sino sino lang nameet sa internet, kasi yun talaga delikado.

Second, treat this dating thing as getting to know people. the more you date, the more practice, eventually, you will be able to decipher din what you want and do not want in a guy.   

Third, have some ready topics in mind. it is supposed to get to know, so talk about yourself and also get to know him.

Tapos, maganda din minsan kung magschedule ng lunch (if you happen to be working in the same area), or weeknight dinner.  Kasi kung sakaling ayaw mo ang ka-date mo, sabihin mo lang na, kelangan mo na bumalik sa work (casual lunch lang naman) or pag weeknight naman, sabihin mo may early meeting ka pa kaya you need to go. 

Hope this helps.

[caterpillar-girl]

Isipin mo na [textspeak!] pupunta ka ng enchanted kingdom 

LOL anong ibig sabihin nito?

Anyway, TS, just think of your dates as people. They're just like a regular dudes who eat, and fart and take a dump like every other person in the world.  Don't think of them immediately as  "prospects," and judge them on whether "pwede" or "hindi pwede." Just get to know them as you would any other person you're getting to know.

There are very few basic dating rules lang naman I think, and I bet you already know them. Dress appropriately, veer away from topics like ex-boyfriends, don't hog the entire conversation, be polite, offer to pay, stuff like that. I'm sure you know all those already, so relax, breathe, and if push comes to shove, pretend nalang that you are more comfortable than you really are. Pretty soon you'll forget you're just pretending and you'll start to feel more at ease Good luck!

[ecnarfoj]

TS, siguro you haven't found a person worth going outside your comfort zone. Yung tipong if you don't take the chance getting to know him, you know you'll regret it.

Nung single pa ako, di talaga ako nakikipag-date kapag di ko kakilala or tipong nareto lang saken. Parang pilit for me so mas ok saken yung alam kong gusto ko talaga yung guy. Kahit superficial like lang at least kahit papaano bet ko siya. Usap-usap muna either thru chat or texting para medyo alam ko na kung paano kami mag-uusap in person.

Afraid of dating? Di ba mas nakakatakot tumanda mag-isa?

[claireclaire]

^ ganito din ako. i only go out with guys na naging friends ko na. super takot to date. but thanks for the reminder na mas nakakatakot tumanda mag-isa, hahaha! i'm 32 na e.

[prettychestnut]

32 here also. I'm not afraid of dating.

Basta ako ang magbibigay ng meeting place, malapit pa sa bahay. ok na. lol

[freelancer_babe]

Maybe I've been afraid for quite a while. Hanggang ngayon wala pa akong kaseryoso.

Tapos work at home pa ako. I don't get to go out.

I force myself to go out on a weekends. I also force myself to meet people. In reality mas comportable ako sa bahay but then, how could I find love (if ever ba na darating pa) kung magkukulong ako?

Or just even plain friendships lang?