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Author Topic: Break ups after 3years in relationship  (Read 31956 times)

pretty_lexie

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Break ups after 3years in relationship
« on: January 25, 2010, 11:15:50 am »
Some says that hardest part of relationship was when u reached the 3rd year. Mostly ended in breaking up. Have u experienced this? share ur stories here..

jazzlawyer

  • Guest
Re: Break ups after 3years in relationship
« Reply #1 on: January 25, 2010, 01:14:42 pm »
wow galing. been in a 3 year and 2 months old relationship. we broke up last year. super devastated ako. sabi niya he fell out of love. it came to me by surprise. kala ko everthing was well between us. after ilang weeks lang may iba na pala siya.

i think if youre in a relationship there would come a time a mapaplateau siya. its up to you how to sustain the spark nalang. unfortunately, mine didnt succeed.

aquacharly

  • Guest
Re: Break ups after 3years in relationship
« Reply #2 on: January 25, 2010, 11:54:21 pm »
If a relationship breaks up before marriage, consider yourself lucky.
Sure it is a heartbreak, but less of a disaster than a broken marriage.

IMO, it isn't the number of years that is the major heartbreak. 
It is the "cost" of the relationship that is the underlying issue of break-ups:   what you gave up, how far you compromised yourself, how you changed yourself... to keep that relationship going.

People who lose themselves, and have difficulty "recognizing" themselves after some time in a relationship (a month, a year, 50 years.. whatever...)  ... those who decreased their options/self empowerment in so many ways while in the relationship/marriage ... these have the bigger heartbreak, the harder time moving-on when the sh1t hits the fan.

You're not married to him and he left? 
Look at it this way:  you can always find better.
You're married to him and he left?
Look at it this way:  you can always do better.
He left, before or after marriage -- look at it this way:  You can always be happier.
 

hairt mini

  • Guest
Re: Break ups after 3years in relationship
« Reply #3 on: January 28, 2010, 05:28:54 pm »
If a relationship breaks up before marriage, consider yourself lucky.
Sure it is a heartbreak, but less of a disaster than a broken marriage.

IMO, it isn't the number of years that is the major heartbreak. 
It is the "cost" of the relationship that is the underlying issue of break-ups:   what you gave up, how far you compromised yourself, how you changed yourself... to keep that relationship going.

People who lose themselves, and have difficulty "recognizing" themselves after some time in a relationship (a month, a year, 50 years.. whatever...)  ... those who decreased their options/self empowerment in so many ways while in the relationship/marriage ... these have the bigger heartbreak, the harder time moving-on when the sh1t hits the fan.

You're not married to him and he left? 
Look at it this way:  you can always find better.
You're married to him and he left?
Look at it this way:  you can always do better.
He left, before or after marriage -- look at it this way:  You can always be happier.

super agree!!!!

had a broke-up for my 6+ years bf last july..

now got a man far a way better than him!!! =)

bebe_eiram

  • Guest
Re: Break ups after 3years in relationship
« Reply #4 on: January 29, 2010, 03:06:38 pm »
mag 5 years na kami ng boyfriend ko this march 29...and we are going pa dapat in boracay for vacation this february..however last night we had a fight...and all of the sudden he told me..."magbreak na [textspeak!]..ayoko na...sabihin mo ng makitid utak ko..g**o ako..pero nasasaktan na ako at nasasakal sau..simula ngayon break na [textspeak!]"..OMG :'(, ganun na lang ba kadali un... ive been calling him..bbut he ignore me..as he alwaya do everytime na inaaway ko [textspeak!]...then this morning..i texted him...i said that..maybe he's right...im so outspoken person..salita lang ng salita without thinking if nasasaktan ba [textspeak!]...and i agree if we can have space...and im sincerely apologize..and begging him na wag na kami maghiwalay...dahil mahal na mahal ko talaga [textspeak!]...andhe answered lang... im sorry..thanx you..good luck for both of us..goodbye...what's that supposed to mean?..then i read pa sa wall ng facebook nya...he commented on his High school friend status..at sabi ng friend nya girl...oist asan na [textspeak!] boracay natin dyan ah?... ayoko mag isp ng di mganda about him... hindi kasi un [textspeak!] lagi namin pinagtatalunan...pinaka least ko maiisip na ipagpapalit nya ko...pero i think..nanawa na talaga sya...give me some advice naman...di ko [textspeak!] kaya [textspeak!] emotional stress na ito...at tingin nyo ba...mahal pa din nya ko..? or nanghihinayang na lang sya sa relationship kaya kami tumagal...?
thanx

clueless_girl

  • Guest
Re: Break ups after 3years in relationship
« Reply #5 on: January 29, 2010, 03:09:56 pm »
^sis ang dami mong textspeak edit mo yung message mo. :)

kutingpie

  • Guest
Re: Break ups after 3years in relationship
« Reply #6 on: January 29, 2010, 03:11:34 pm »
@bebe_eiram, can you please modify your post? ang hirap basahin..don't type kasi as if you're using your cellphone, complete your words kasi nakaka-detect ng text language ang system ng GT.

thanks

dYusILicious

  • Guest
Re: Break ups after 3years in relationship
« Reply #7 on: January 29, 2010, 03:52:26 pm »
^^^ sis bebe_eiram sa tingin ko sobrang napuno na kase yung bf mo sayo kaya sya umayaw. is this the first time na nag break kayo? kund hindi baka talagang end na yan. ayaw na nya base dun sa reply nya. so move on kana sis sa tingin ko

stacies83221

  • Guest
Re: Break ups after 3years in relationship
« Reply #8 on: February 01, 2010, 05:39:43 am »
^bebe_eiram:  give him time... i think he got fed up to the max. make him feel that you're there when he's ready to talk.

em_cee

  • Guest
Re: Break ups after 3years in relationship
« Reply #9 on: February 01, 2010, 05:58:52 am »
If a relationship breaks up before marriage, consider yourself lucky.
Sure it is a heartbreak, but less of a disaster than a broken marriage.

IMO, it isn't the number of years that is the major heartbreak. 
It is the "cost" of the relationship that is the underlying issue of break-ups:   what you gave up, how far you compromised yourself, how you changed yourself... to keep that relationship going.

People who lose themselves, and have difficulty "recognizing" themselves after some time in a relationship (a month, a year, 50 years.. whatever...)  ... those who decreased their options/self empowerment in so many ways while in the relationship/marriage ... these have the bigger heartbreak, the harder time moving-on when the sh1t hits the fan.

You're not married to him and he left? 
Look at it this way:  you can always find better.
You're married to him and he left?
Look at it this way:  you can always do better.
He left, before or after marriage -- look at it this way:  You can always be happier.
 


I appreciate these words of wisdom.  I so needed it.

jazzlawyer

  • Guest
Re: Break ups after 3years in relationship
« Reply #10 on: February 09, 2010, 08:10:50 am »
bakit maraming guys sobrang dali lang sa kanila maka move ... parang ang dali dali lang itapon sa kanila yung 3 years or so relationship.. is it just because they have found someone new? thats it? ganon lang kadali? they dont even know whats going to be like with their new gfs

gingerandspice

  • Guest
Re: Break ups after 3years in relationship
« Reply #11 on: February 21, 2010, 05:40:17 am »
OMG. SO TRUE!!! kami ng friends ko puro 3 years. bakit kaya? hayayay

mimiku

  • Guest
Re: Break ups after 3years in relationship
« Reply #12 on: February 22, 2010, 05:48:41 pm »
wow galing. been in a 3 year and 2 months old relationship. we broke up last year. super devastated ako. sabi niya he fell out of love. it came to me by surprise. kala ko everthing was well between us. after ilang weeks lang may iba na pala siya.

i think if youre in a relationship there would come a time a mapaplateau siya. its up to you how to sustain the spark nalang. unfortunately, mine didnt succeed.

Mine 3 years and 3 months. =)

We're riding on the same boat. My x suddenly told me one day after finding out that he cheated on me the second time around that "he can no longer love me the way he loved me before." I was really shocked since I thought everything was okay. I have already given him another chance and still he ended hurting me again. I sacrificed everything for him. Sinuway ko parents ko at pumunta ako dito sa Manila because of him. I resigned from my previous company when I was about to be promoted because I thought it would be better if I'll stay with him. But then after 5 months of living with him (3 years din kami) he just tossed me away because of a third party. What I don't understand is he's settling for a kabit mode (since the girl eh may kalive-in din and may anak pa and she's like so matanda na)... Haay. Ganun lang talaga. Nag500 days of summer ako talaga... and I was super devastated. Lesson learned: DON'T GIVE EVERYTHING. MAGTIRA KA NG PAGMAMAHAL SA SARILI MO.
« Last Edit: February 23, 2010, 10:57:20 am by mimiku »

sweetestCORN

  • Guest
Re: Break ups after 3years in relationship
« Reply #13 on: February 23, 2010, 01:28:59 am »
it's just a clear sign that fate itself won't allow us to settle for any less. mauna na sila maging masaya.. mas masarap yung huling halakhak mga sis :)

jazzlawyer

  • Guest
Re: Break ups after 3years in relationship
« Reply #14 on: February 23, 2010, 06:06:41 am »
Mine 3 years and 3 months. =)

We're riding on the same boat. My x suddenly told me one day after finding out that he cheated on me the second time around that "he can no longer love me the way he loved me before." I was really shocked since I thought everything was okay. I have already given him another chance and still he ended hurting me again. I sacrificed everything for him. Sinuway ko parents ko at pumunta ako dito sa Manila because of him. I resigned from my previous company when I was about to be promoted because I thought it would be better if I'll stay with him. But then after 3 years he just tossed me away because of a third party. What I don't understand is he's settling for a kabit mode (since the girl eh may kalive-in din and may anak pa and she's like so matanda na)... Haay. Ganun lang talaga. Nag500 days of summer ako talaga... and I was super devastated. Lesson learned: DON'T GIVE EVERYTHING. MAGTIRA KA NG PAGMAMAHAL SA SARILI MO.

^^ omg sis we're actually on the same boat! pinagpalit din ako sa matanda na may anak na (as in like 10 years ang old ng girl sa ex ko) and theyre living in together weekslang before we broke up. hay naku.


it's just a clear sign that fate itself won't allow us to settle for any less. mauna na sila maging masaya.. mas masarap yung huling halakhak mga sis :)

i love what you said sis.  :D

mimiku

  • Guest
Re: Break ups after 3years in relationship
« Reply #15 on: February 23, 2010, 10:43:06 am »
it's just a clear sign that fate itself won't allow us to settle for any less. mauna na sila maging masaya.. mas masarap yung huling halakhak mga sis :)

Yup tee hee!... I always say to myself nagyon nagsasaya ka pa but when my time comes, your time goes... tee hee!...  ;D ;D


^^ omg sis we're actually on the same boat! pinagpalit din ako sa matanda na may anak na (as in like 10 years ang old ng girl sa ex ko) and theyre living in together weekslang before we broke up. hay naku.


Yup... just after kong umalis sa apartment namin nakitira na din [textspeak!] officemate pero syempre pashiftshift siya ng place since super kabit lang niya si X and from what I heard eh umuuwi pa rin siya sa kalive-in niya (hay poor guy ang bait pa naman nun)... nandiri ako kasi naiwan ko pa some of my things there before like my pillows and bedsheets... waahhh and there making gamit pa of them. Ewwwwwwwww!!!!!! tee hee!


Wala lang pag naiisip ko yung nangyari sa akin eh natatawa na rin ako minsan... I'm taking it as a sign from God that he's really no good for me and that there are still a lot of blessings to come... that I really don't have to settle sa isang ukay-ukay lang. =D



TO ALL THE GIRLS OUT THERE: NEVER SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS! Dapat maging cautious kayo sa mga ginigive-up niyo. PLS PLS Huwag niyo akong gayahin na giniv-up ko career and my family because of a stupid jerk. AND ONE THING FOR SURE THAT I'VE LEARNED "ONCE A CHEATER ALWAYS A CHEATER!"
 8) 8) 8) ;D


abs_1013

  • Guest
Re: Break ups after 3years in relationship
« Reply #16 on: February 25, 2010, 01:52:16 pm »
3 years and 4 mos nman nag last ang relationship nmin siguro nga eh nagsawa na rin ang bawat isa sa amin na para kaming mga aso't pusa.. on-off mas lalo na ngayon nag wwork na siya sa abroad at shifting ang schedule niya halos laging busy at hindi na kami nagkakausap. Halos sa lahat ng bagay eh hind na [textspeak!] kami nagkakasundo kaya nag decide na ako makipag hiwalay kahit masakit. Sa ngayon eh hindi man lang siya nag ttext o tumatawag para pag usapan namin.

Tanggap ko na rin at im moving on na... so far eni enjoy ko na rin ang sarili ko at kasama ang family ko habang hinihintay ko na rin ang pagdating ng VISA ko dahil paalis na rin ako.

Alam ko pagnaka alis ako eh mas madali ko na siyang makakalimutan kaya im praying so hard na makaalis na ako next month.

Feb 21 - break up ... medyo fresh pa pero naniniwala ako na makaka move on din ako eventually...


aquacharly

  • Guest
Re: Break ups after 3years in relationship
« Reply #17 on: February 25, 2010, 02:20:06 pm »
The question that intrigues me -- why is it (it appears) soooo easy for guys to move on after a relationship breaks up  --when they do not even know what kind of GF they are getting next.?)

I think when a relationshship starts to fray at the edges, we women react positively and aggressively (well, generally we do so) -- as in, we think of what is going wrong or causing us discontent... and how or what can we do to put the relationship back on track.

As for men, they do think differently from us.
They just let it be, let it go. 
Even when they already are in the process of psychologically abandoning the relationship  (sure he is physically around, but you know when there is no more "connect"?)   --  they generally  have no guts to ask  what's wrong?  what can we do to get this relationship back on track?   Hindi nila gagawin yon.  They will let things slide, until the woman wants out, or the woman exhibits behavior that can be used as grounds for wanting out of the relationship.

Remember, we are nurturers, we repair, we persist, we bring things to life.   Sila, they conquer, they roam, they abandon and look for greener grass.  They look, the Divine Justice in all that is ... they do not necessarily get something better.  The better Divine Justice is that they get what they deserve.  LOL
« Last Edit: February 25, 2010, 02:23:46 pm by aquacharly »

fairy_godmother14

  • Guest
Re: Break ups after 3years in relationship
« Reply #18 on: February 25, 2010, 03:32:05 pm »
bakit maraming guys sobrang dali lang sa kanila maka move ... parang ang dali dali lang itapon sa kanila yung 3 years or so relationship.. is it just because they have found someone new? thats it? ganon lang kadali? they dont even know whats going to be like with their new gfs

a big YES sis...
hindi naman agad mkaka-move on ang isang tao hangga't walang kapalit na bago...
as simple as that!

fairy_godmother14

  • Guest
Re: Break ups after 3years in relationship
« Reply #19 on: February 25, 2010, 03:39:02 pm »
meron ngang saying na:
"hindi basehan ang tagal, totoong mas mahal niya ang ipapalit sayo kahit sandali pa lang niya ito nakikilala, kesa sa'yo na taon na ang binilang na mag-bf/gf pero hindi pa rin nag-workout.."
-simply because lahat ng hindi niya nakita sa'yo eh nakita na niya dun sa ipapalit niyang bago.
pansin niyo rin ba na magugulat ka na lang na bigla na silang ikakasal nung ipinalit sa'yo kahit months pa lang na nagiging sila.

 

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