yes, sis. iba kasi talaga pag meron kang anxiety/panic attacks. yung may feeling ka na parang di mo macontrol self mo tapos yung parang mababaliw ka na natetense. most of the time, nagkaka panic attack ako pag madaming tao. ewan ko nga ba't ganun kasi dati, nung wala pa akong anxiety, gusto kong gumimik, mamasyal, sumabay with friends, ganun. tapos I don't really stay at home. But starting nung nagka anxiety/panic attacks nako para nag change lahat. I seldom go out na kasi nga natatakot ako na baka biglang umatake siya while I'm in a public place. Yun talaga yung natatakot ako especially pag mag-isa lang akong umalis ng bahay. kaya most of the time, may kasama talaga ako.
hello,
a few months ago nagkaroon din ako ng panic attack. i was walking alone sa Espanya then bigla na lang nag-blank yung mind ko as if wala akong memory at di makaisip feeling ko hihimatayin ako kasi parang bigla na lang ako nawalan ng energy pero di naman ako hinimitay so i rushed immediately sa McDo just in case himatayin ako eh at least merong guard sa loob na puwede umattend sa akin.
pero di naman ako hinimatay, pag-upo ko sa McDo na feel ko na sobrang lakas ng beat ng puso ko at so uminom ako ng tubig tapos mga few seconds mag-ba-blackout uli yung mind ko then feeling ko nasisiraan na ako ng ulo pero conscious naman ako sa paligid.
After about 2 weeks while walking again this time it was evening, tapos humihingal na talaga ako dahil sa pagod eh biglang lumakas na naman yung beat ng heart ko then biglang sobrang nervous na feeling and ang sumunod eh nag-blank na naman yung mind (feel ko i'm losing my mind) and i thought hihimatayin ako tapos hind naman ako hinimatay. i just sat on a nearby bench drink water and i was feeling ok ulit hanggang makasakay ako ng bus papuntang bahay.
After those incidents medyo nagkaroon ako ng konting phobia pag nasa labas, feel ko nahihilo ako when i am in public places.
The worst attack was this MAY. even with the last two attacks, i still try to feel normal and just think na it's only in the mind. kaya nung MAY i tried to go to school ride the jeepney as i normally would, then suddenly i remembered my experience about panic attack. then naisip ko di kaya atakihin na naman ako ng panic attack dito sa loob ng jeep. After a few minutes holy crap!. Ayun na naman yung biglang "mag-ba-blank young mind ko" then feeling nervous, feeling hihimatayin. Then i tried to console myself sabi ko ulit sa sarili ko "it's only in the mind" kaya hindi pa rin ako bumaba ng jeep and tried to go home. But after about 15 minutes ayun umatake na naman, then sabi ko bababa na ako sa next crossing. unfortunately, the next crossing was the actual place where i had my first panic attack. So ayun pagka-baba ko pa lang ng jeep eh halos na trigger na naman. Pasok agad sa 7-Eleven just in case himatayin ako coz i already have that "mental black-out / blank mind episode" pero kahit na blank mind ako at feeling ko i am losing my mind i can still pull myself to 7-Eleven. pahinga ng konti sa 7-Eleven then i eventually ride the jeep papunta sa boarding house. While inside the jeep, i had an on and off panic attack mga 3 times pa yata for the next 30 minutes. it was scary because feeling ko "i am going crazy" and baka ang mangyari sunod eh talagang mabaliw ako ng tuluyan. eh ang layo pa naman ng bahay ko. i live in the province kasi and have to commute from the province going to manila. i have to ride a bus from the province going to QC then jeep naman from QC to manila going to school. i only use to boarding house to eat and take some light rest but daily ako umuuwi ng province.
after those incidents, nagkaroon na ako ng konting phobia when walking alone sa labas na walang kakikalala thinking na baka magkaroon uli ako ng panic attacks then biglang himatayin na walang mag-ti-take care sa akin. so right now i have to stop schooling muna and stay in the province.
the first few months while i was in the province, medyo OK pa ako ng konti and medyo nakakalabas pa ng walang kasama pero i already have the feeling na baka mapanic attack din ako tulad sa Manila. then this August while i was riding in a jeep napanic attack talaga ako but i did not have the "black out mind/feeling crazy/feeling losing my mind episode" i only have the super nervous feeling and rapid heartbeat episode.
ever since that episode, di na talaga ako nakalabas ng bahay na walang kasama and it made me depressed. i went to a psychiatrist with a companion kasi natatakot na ako lumabas ng bahay na walang kasama especially sa loob ng jepneey and in public places. the psych prescribed some meds.
kaya ko naman i surpase yung feeling na "aatakehin ka sa puso" during panic attack, pero and di ko talaga kaya ay yung "mental blackout na feeling mababaliw at feeling hihimatayin".
i read on the net na hindi ka naman daw mababaliw even during panic attacks because of the fact na you still have that feeling na mababaliw ka.
kasi yung mga crazy people daw, they do not know na baliw na sila. and they will not have the feeling na mababaliw sila.
