Night shift si hubby :(

[emeenem]

I know na common na nowadays ang work schedule na hindi usual like 8am to 5pm or 9am to 6pm.

So for those who have usbands working at night, any tips?

My number one dilemma is magsusuffer ang quality time namin. I have a day job naman so magkikita lang kami when I get home (paalis na sha). Pati weekends, sira. Hindi na kami makakalabas on Saturdays kasi late na sha nagigising. Ayoko nama gisingin kasi kawawa. Although good yung setup for our 1 year baby kasi hindi sha nababakante halos, relationship namin ni hubby ang affected.

Sanayan lang ba ito?

[sarahsensible]

sa amin naman before, ako yung kailangan pang gabi for 3 mos lang naman.

Uuwi ako ng umaga, para may quality time pa - papasok si hubby after lunch pero hindi pwedeng laging ganun.

Nahirapan sya ayun pinag resign ako at pinatigil mag work.

Siguro nga sis sanayan din.

[emeenem]

^lagi ba kayong nag aaway nun sis?

hahaha... sabi ko nga mag resign na lang sha pag di na nya kaya. hanap na lang ulit ng iba... or ako ang magreresign para maaasikaso ko sha pag gising nya pati na rin si baby

[sarahsensible]

^about what naman sis?

kami hindi kasi we communicate, well since ako yung pang gabi lagi ko sya kinakausap sa abot ng aking makakaya or we meet half way. Kausap like pag sa work sa gabi, YM kami if not text or call ko sya nag lalambing ako and give him heads up na ginagawa ko sa office ganun.

[chai_girl]

I know na common na nowadays ang work schedule na hindi usual like 8am to 5pm or 9am to 6pm.

So for those who have usbands working at night, any tips?

My number one dilemma is magsusuffer ang quality time namin. I have a day job naman so magkikita lang kami when I get home (paalis na sha). Pati weekends, sira. Hindi na kami makakalabas on Saturdays kasi late na sha nagigising. Ayoko nama gisingin kasi kawawa. Although good yung setup for our 1 year baby kasi hindi sha nababakante halos, relationship namin ni hubby ang affected.

Sanayan lang ba ito?

hi sis , i have the same dilema eversince we got married, [textspeak!] production worker sya, he has no choice but to get the graveyard shift also ganyan din kmi twing weekends parati syang tulog. naawa din ako [textspeak!] payat na nga sya tas mawalan pa ng tulog maging ting-ting na sya. hehe. so la me choice but to understand keysa la syang work sis. ganyan [textspeak!]. pag Holidays minsan ang pinahahandaan nlng namin.

[sweety_paige]

At least yung hubby mo work ang pinag kakaabalahan....

Isipin mo nalang lucky ka dahil may work siya, mahirap din kasing maghanap ng work eh.

Basta huwag lang mag suffer yung communication niyo okay na yun.

[tayntayn]

sa production din ang hubby ko and monthly nagpapalit ng shift. so every other month, pangggabi sya.

how do we get quality time? sacrifice lang on both sides. kapag dadating na sya sa madaling araw, gigising ako then we talk and update each other. minsan pag antok na talaga ako, pagbubuksan ko lang sya ng door then say hi then sleep ulit ako. kapag weekends, he will be the one to sacrifice naman na gumising ng maaga-aga para makasama kami ng mga anak namin.

i would say big help talaga ang cellphones kasi kaya lagi kaming updated kasi we always call each other. pati yung 4 y.o. ko every night mga 7pm tinatawagan nya ang dada nya just to say hi and update him. medyo magastos pero mas mahirap naman yung tipong hindi niyo na kilala ang isat isa dahil hindi kayo nagkakausap na.

mahirap talaga yung ganitong set up. yan ang reklamo ko palagi sa kanya parang laging on call sya. tapos kapag holidays, obliged silang pumasok. wala namang magagawa about that so the best talaga is to sacrifice.

[twelvth_goddess]

Same situation for us, it's baliktad lang cus im the one who works in the evening while my hubby works during the day.

Most of the time, early shift si hubby so by the time he gets off work, im preparing naman so we get to eat dinner together before he drives me to the office. Hinde din sya fixed weekends off like me so I get sad kapag nasa work sya the whole day. I think I got used to it na naman kase pag day time naman tapos anjan sya, naninibago ko pag katabi ko sya sa bed cus usually I have the bed all to myself pag day and I can sleep diagonally (literally!) hehe.

Drama ko lang naman sometimes yung 'we dont get to see/spend time with each other' thing but actually, there's time naman talaga kahit pano.

[Pretty_ava]

baliktad kami ni hubby, ako ang pang gabi sya naman day shift.  sanayan lang talaga, maayos ang set up na ito sa amin kasi si baby eh hindi naiiwan mag isa sa yaya.  kaya lang minsan nagkakaroon kami ng mga arguments like kung sino mamalengke.  pero naayos din naman.  simpleng bagay lang.  pag weekends naman, may pasok pa din sya ng sabado.  sunday and monday off nya ako naman sat and sun tapos monday mrning pa.  so ayun, quality time, we do the laundry together and groceries, attend mass and pasyal si ava.off kasi ni yaya every sundays eh.

pag weekdays almost 4 hours lang kami magkasama.  sanayan lang and trust to each other.  we are surviving naman sa ganitong set up.

[tink ^-_^]

sanayan lang talaga iyan.

i experienced this before.. i worked at night, hubby was in the morning shift.. days off magkaiba din.. our communication is always open, i say what i feel  kapag napansin ko nang 1 week na kaming hindi naguusap, sinasabi ko habang naglalambing...good thing naman kasi hubby was willing to exert more effort so we could have a [textspeak!]!

[blooming]

D b better na naman ang ganyang set up kesa isa sa inyo abroad?

[Cheesecak3]

Noong nasa call center pa kami pareho mahirap talaga, kasi iba iba ang shift namin, halos hindi na kami nagkikita. Kaya nong nagkababy na kami tumigil na ako sa pagwork.

[ceejhei]

^ hubby works on the night shift and ako morning naman.

 he was able to get an off during sat-sun kasi may shift bid daw sila and since he's one of the top performer nakuha niya ang sat-sun na off.

ako naman off ko wed and saturday, yes split offs. im lucky. my work starts at 6am and ends at 3pm. by 3:30 im home na. akyat ako sa room gigisingin si hubby to let him know im home. tapos cook for dinner, sabay na kami ni hubby mag dinner, ako din nag hahanda ng baon niya, antayin ko siya until he leaves for work.

[chai_girl]

^ hubby works on the night shift and ako morning naman.

 he was able to get an off during sat-sun kasi may shift bid daw sila and since he's one of the top performer nakuha niya ang sat-sun na off.

super swerte mo sis me, may dilema na kami sa bahay. i am not able to talk with him more often, and also if there is a chance, wala sya sa mood kasi sakit daw ulo niya due to night shift

[longing]

^sis, i'd say mahirap talaga if night shift si hubby...for the past 3 1/2 years together (gf/bf then we got married) night shift siya...sanayan lang din talaga and dapat you compromise on the things na dapat ginagawa ng married couple.

honestly, naging mas madalas ang argument din namin when he transferred centers, before kasi we work in one company. daily, he has to stay for at least 14 hours sa office, nakakapikon coz ultimately it's not healthy para sa kanya and sa aming relationship BUT i still understand.  as other sisses here shared, malaking bagay ang cellphone to communicate, you may need to sacrifice as well at night to text him just to check on him, if he has eaten na or nag break man lang ba siya.

if wala siya sa mood to talk, let him rest, let it pass...kasi if you insist to talk and wala siya sa condition, mas maga away lang kayo. timingan mo na maganda ang mood then discuss. if mahirap ito, write him a letter or send him an email

more importantly, you should TRUST your husband. 

[emeenem]

^^ sis ganyan din kami ngayon... we don't talk as often and if gising sha, laging mainit ulo dahil puyat daw.

sacrifice nga lang talaga and double work for us wives to keep the relationship and love alive. pagdating ni hubby, effort talaga na gigising ako para ihanda yung susuotin nya at ihug sha sa umaga. kung kakayanin, breakfast together tapos balik tulog. tapos sa hapon naman, uwi ako talaga agad para more time with him and my baby tapos dinner kami sabay. sa madaling araw naman, i try to stay up as late para maka IM sha (kwento kwento lang about office, news, baby.. etc.) or text hanggang mag lunch sha (around 1am). hirap din kasi puyat talaga pati tayo.

tapos habang nasa office ako tapos nakita ko na gising na sha, i try to call him up agad to ask if kumain na sha, anong ginawa nila ni baby.. mga ganun lang. swerte kasi nasusundo nya ako sa office bago sha pumasok.

sometimes, i text him sweet messages or put post its sa mirror/car or sa susuotin nyang damit. kahit anong strategy. minsan if may time pa ako and strength, i cook his favorite food.

sa mood naman nya. sobrang pasensha talaga to the max ang binibigay ko sa kanya. lots of understanding din and support kasi sa kanya mahirap din physically.

[ceejhei]

^ sis chai girl,
yes, im indeed lucky kasi napag sisilbihan ko pa sila ni baby. Minsan nga pumapasok siya na gusot na yung damit niya para lang hindi na ako magplantsa. Pero minsan talaga i make sure na okay ang things niya. hindi ako nagmimiss when it comes to cooking kasi dinner time talaga ang bonding namin and after we ate, akyat na sa room with our baby tapos bonding moments ulit.

Natutuwa kasi ako makita siyang madaming nakakain, tapos hihirit pa na, "hun, baunin ko to ha?"

[chai_girl]

So nice that you can all cope with the schedule, sometimes i pity myself having been married to a person who can only apply in grave yard shifts. Sometimes i ask, "why cant he apply for work with a normal schedule, say 8 to 5?". I am a working mom of 2, this is why i cannot please him or take care of him. My work is as hectic as well, so i do not have time to cook or to prepare his clothes because i shall not have time anymore to bond with my children which is my priority.

[ms.rain]

my cousin (girl) works graveyard shifts while husband works during the day. maswerte sila coz parehong weekend ang offs nila. but now that they have a baby already, my cousin wants to look for day job na. hindi na baleng masmababa raw ang pay, basta normal ang schedule and makakasama nya ng sabay asawa at anak nya. 


ako naman, im not yet married pero bf discourages me from getting work na 'alanganin' ang schedule. may work opportunity kasi na dumating pero fixed 4pm to 1am ang job. even if i drive, ayaw nya ako umuuwi ng ganun ka-late since delikado raw. yung isa naman, 9pm to 6am.... pero parang ayaw pa rin nya.  takot siguro masira schedule ng pagdadate namin. joke lang. hehe. 

[ubay]

big problem ko yan last year. hubby used to work for a call center (IT admin sya). his shift was from 10pm to 7am. so ang set-up namin was for me to go home early para maabutan ko sya. dapat before 7pm nasa house na ako, if not, hinde ko na sya maabutan. during weekends, bawi sya ng tulog. so, saturday night ang bonding namin and we normally went out on sundays kasama anakis. madalas ako absent on mondays kasi saturday and sunday lang kami magkatabing matulog. pag saturday pa, minsan gising sya sa gabi kasi tulog sya maghapon from friday work. so sunday night kasarapan ng tulog namin kasi magkatabi kami hehe. hanggang sa we decided na bumalik na lang sya sa dati nya work. it turned out well. morning shift na sya, mas madami pa kami time for each other. ako naman late umuwi ngayon haaay.

anyway, for those of you na may hubby or bf na panggabi, open communication parati and have at least once a week for each other.