Does your Yaya/Helper really follow your instructions?

[mikelly]

I am just curious if they can really follow especially pag hindi tayo nakatingin sa kanila.  I can compromise with them kung okay naman yung point nila but the thing is i don't want it to be a reason para mamihasa sila at sila na ang magdecision what to do. 

Like what happened to my child's sleeping pattern. Ayoko lang kasi na the helper will let my daughter take her nap as early as 10:00am or 11:00am because my daughter will wake up at 1pm. Too early. wala naman gagawin anak ko the whole afternoon.  Because of this, magiging reason lang ni helper na manuod ng tv the whole afternoon since gising daughter ko. wala na siyang ibang nagagawang trabaho.

She's complaining na napupuyat daw siya. Eh subukan kaya niyang wag manuod ng tv the whole afternoon so she can sleep. 10am din kasi inaantok na si helper kaya pati daughter ko papatulugin niya ng ganun kaaga. okay lang din sana kung maghahanap siya ng ibang gagawin in the afternoon like konting ligpit-ligpit pero hindi, nagiging reason yun para magbabad siya sa tv.

Eh sa isip-isip ko, whatever set-up we have here sa house, you should adjust, diba? sinabihan pa ako na malabo daw ako.  Sabi ko, pano naging malabo yun eh yung tulog ng bata yung paiba-iba.

Ang ayaw ko pa dito sa helper namin, porket mas matanda sa min, kung makapagsalita akala mo na kung sino, eh 2 months pa lang siya sa min at ganun na kung umasta. Kahit MIL ko binabara din niya.  Ayoko lang talagang pumatol sa katulong at sa ganung attitude pero may araw din siya sa kin.  silent killer ito. 

By the way, she is partly yaya and helper at the same time.  She does not do the laundry and iron of our clothes ha. Kung tutuosin, she can make diskarte naman kung pano nya iha-handle yung task sa bahay.  Light na nga mga tasks niya.  Hindi rin siya ang nagluluto. 

Kayo, what's your inputs on this?

[genivy21]

Im an OC. Not naman super, pero I do a schedule.

Recently, I did a to-do list, rules and regulations, likes and don'ts and other stuff. As in me listahan. Before a maid starts in my house, I explain everything and give them a copy. I also post the things na baka makalimutan nila like how many tbps for milk ni eldest, ni youngest. How many ml of vitamins and what day lang ipapainom.

Now para maensure na nagagawa nila iyong gusto ko, i do spot check. Like sometimes, gigising ako ng super aga and just observe. or go down kahit usually nasa taas ako. para me gulat factor. i also dirty the bathroom walls purposely just to check kung nililinis ba nila iyon. Minsan habang pinapainom nila ng vitamins ang mga bata, i grab the tiny containers to check kung tama ang ml.

Alam nyo, we cannot be with them 24/7. Yung nga iyong purpose nila di ba, maging present kung wala tayo. kaya i make sure they know that i am still watching them kahit hindi 24/7.

Minsan nga umuuwi ako dati just to check kung anung ginagawa/nagawa na nila sa house. dun kasi nagkakahulihan ka\pag masyado na silang kampante.

Ngayon kung matigas ang ulo, ayaw sumunod or magtipid. I make them feel my anger by being strict. Di ka marunong gumamit ng sabon ha, e di magsachet ka! per laba, ganitong daming sachet lang. then i check iyong amoy ng pinalabhan ko. kapag naman ayaw sumunod, tinatakot ko na babawasan kong sweldo nila. like if nuod ng nuod ng tv, sabi ko hihingan ko sila ng share sa kuryente since mahilig sila manuod ng tv!

[aquacharly]

MIKELLY -- find a replacement for that helper-yaya of yours.
 
I will just cite some general case facts for those like us who entrust our kids for x no. of hours to a caretaker...

    1st,  speaking even for my licensed midwife-yayas -- these people we hire are inferior to us in terms of education, breeding, standards and lifestyles.  HINDI AKO NAGMAMATA, just speaking the truth.
(Malabo yata ma hire ko si Mark Pangilinan to even just babysit my kids.  LOL)

    2nd --   Parents' acts always are determined by the objective of bringing up chidren that are sooooo much better than they are....
(Kaya nga we have dreams for our kids... hindi iyong I own x business eh ang dream ko same same for my kids di ba.  Of course! ang dream eh x, y, z if not a-z business di ba)

    3rd --    Parents have a set of non-negotiable rules/requirements with regards to their kids' care while under the caregiver/yaya/midwife/helper/even mother/MIL or relative
It is expected that these be FOLLOWED since these stem from what the parents deem is BEST for their kids.
(Hindi iyong pa iba iba ang gagawin sa anak natin depende sa mood ng yaya, depende kung bilog ang buwan... hello?)

So, kelangan the yaya STRICTLY FOLLOWS our instructions.
Mali naman if ang masusunod sa pagpatakbo ng araw ng anak ko eh yang inferior person from an inferior background.  Instead of "advancing" my kid eh when it is the yaya who calls the shots, "regress" ang kid.

I work or do business,  not to run away from the care of my kid... but to provide a better life or future for my kid. 
Eh if it is that inferior person from an inferior background who is  the one running the show... it is an illogical state of affairs.
I might as well stay home and manage the kid's days.

OR, turn over the yaya and the kid to your mother or MIL while you are in the office.

Or cuerdasan nang mas mahigpit ang yaya.
Meaning,  motivate her to upgrade her performance with an escalating pay scale... or whatever it takes you deem reasonable. 

Sometimes too, ganoon lang ang performance ng yaya kasi they cannot think themselves through to an alternative behavior or solution to what goes on within the day.  In which case, you just have to be patient to explain alternative behavior she can adapt vis-a-vis the kid.

Basta, remember:  Some things in life should not be compromised.

[ilovecoach]

I've learned my lesson and that is not to get a helper that is older than me.  My suggestion is find a replacement and hire a younger one.  Ayoko ng bastos na katulong.  I've been through this kind of yaya, super yabang at akala kung sino.  We should let them know who's the boss.

I also give a schedule to my yaya and maid.  There's also a list of to do and not to do.  We have to be clear to them on what we expect from them.  And most importantly, wag tayong papayag na maging disrespectful sila sa atin.

[prisma]

I've been there done all that.

may bond paper pa ako full of house regulations na pinapirma, photos taken, nbi, police clearance...may mga pasaway pa rin talaga.

In the end, mas importante ang tiwala sa katulong.

Matagal na maid ko sa akin, almost 10 years na.  Pasensya nalang minsan...kesa mag hire ako ng bago na tuturuan ko pa and hindi ko alam kung pagkakatiwalaan ko. 

Maraming beses na rin ako ninakawan ng mga "Maids from Agencies"...kaya ayaw ko na ...mas maganda ang referral nalang from kapwa maids mo.

[Kady_14]

mikelly - ang konti ng tasks ng maid mo. hindi ka mahihirapan humanap ng kapalit nyan. Kumuha ka na lang nang bago kesa ma-stress.

Minsan we have to accept the fact that we cannot expect high standards or quality performance from our house help kasi most of them are with limited education - minsan mahina talaga or tamad, madahilan. Ako, ayoko na patulan ang mga B*bong sagot or excuses nila minsan. Madami na akong stress. Yan ang role ng MIL ko. hahaha kaya hindi tumatagal ang maids namin. They love me, but they can't stand my MIL.

Yun naman ang problema ko, I always would need to train a new helper kasi I'm living with my MIL and di sya natatagalan ng maids. We lived together on and off for 8 years na, so sanay na ako. Actually naka hiwalay na kami dati pero I had to live with her again when my husband had to work  in Cebu, kasi I also work. So walang kasama kids, yaya lang pag nasa office ako.

But now that the kids are bigger - less alagain, we are moving back to our old house come school end, para hindi na-sstress si yaya ke MIL. hehe. 

I have an excel sheet for tasks and duties ng maid. Things she must prioritize, it also has blank spaces, these are for *other things, basta dapat magawa nya yung nasa sheet kasi yun ang priority ko like, make ure the kids eat on time- me specific time for breakfast, lunch and dinner - in English to kaya natatawa ang mga work mates ko. So far sinusunod naman yun ng yaya ko. Minsan lang di ko gusto how she does some tasks like fixing the bed and stuff, pag ganun naman tinuturo ko how I want it done.

[dwainey]

minsan pag nasa mood pag wala sa mood she doesn't care..galit pag binibigyan ng instructions. mas older kasi sa akin ng 3 years aba e hindi natawag ng ate sa akin ha.. she called me by my first name sa husband ko lang nag kuya.. antipatika kaya pina uwi ko lang..

[can_dice]

My all around = yes, she follows it to the T, but shempre minsan nakakalimutan but nothing major naman. 

My yaya - grabe, i know she's experienced but pare naman, respect my decision and take on things!  Like there are things na ayoko na gawin niya BUT ginagawa parin niyaaaa!!! Argh.....

[realmofadreamer]

naku! dati meron kami nakuhang sobrang tigas ng ulo. laging nagmamagaling at sinasagot pa si mama. kaya nung nagbakasyon nung pasko, hindi na namin pinabalik. buti nga itong pumalit, medyo okay na din.

[mikelly]

So far, that yaya I am referring to is not in our LIFE anymore.  Pinalayas ko na last year.  As in on the spot, I heard that she's complaining and yun, I let her get out of the house.  Hindi ko na hinintay yung month end na pauwi siya ng province.  I'd rather not to have a helper than having her in my life.  She's sooo bastos. Grabe!!

Now, I have a younger one.  Better na yun.  Not a perfect one pero at least you can mold them.  You can make them adjust and follow you. Mas madali pa silang kausap kesa sa mga older than me.  Puro ego pinapairal, kala mo naman may binatbat. Hay naku, bakit ba di sila tumimgin sa salamin so they will realize. 

[babyjapnurse01]

they sometimes do, they sometimes dont. dami na namin napaalis na helpers na sobrang titigas ng ulo, everyday mo na inuulit ulit how you want things to be done, theyd still insist on doing things their own way.

pero now, so far okay naman mga helpers, all of them are masisipag and knows how to follow instructions and mga may initiative, no need to ask them to do stuff, its really nice when you find helpers like them, yung tipong pinapakiramdaman yung preference ng amo, na you dont need na mag-utos everytime kasi kusa na nilang ginagawa.

[yapeegurl]

Most of the time, yes.. i'd say 90% of the time.. she has no reason kasi meron kaming check-list.. she has to mark the box each time she finishes a task.. My goal is for her to keep the chores in her system and be part of her routine na kahit walang chart ay alam na nya.. I am ok if there's an 'X' mark on the box kasi that shows honesty on her part.. I dont mind that basta sa ibang araw magagawa nya iyon.

[twelvth_goddess]

My daughter's yaya follows my instructions most of the time pero I know na may mga times na hinde din nya nasusunod lahat. Examples of nasusunod nya are yung alam nyang sobrang critical for me, like yung pagchange ng nappy, pagpunas ng folds sa legs.

Ang madalas hinde nya nasusunod is yung wag langing kargahin si Zoe. Zoe's at a stage kase na it's critical for her to hone her motor skills. Eh sometimes pag naging fussy lang ng konti, kinakarga na nya instead of just giving Zoe a toy to play with. But I've talked to her several times about it and ok na naman ngayon.

Trust is very important for me kase ayoko yung feeling na kelangan lage ko icheck ginagawa nya especially that I'm working. So far kampante naman ako sa yaya ko kase mabaet sya sa baby ko and masunurin naman sya.

[jaded1025]

Most of the time. Haha! Tigas tuktok eh.

[hersmart4ever]

IBa iba ng state ang utak ng tao. May madaling maka catch up, merong hindi. Know the maid's weakness and if you can see na mahina siya maka follow, huwag bigyan ng bigyan ng maraming instructions coz definitely, hindi makaka follow yan. baka slow talaga siya. If that's the case, give instruction one at a time or a few at a time. Pag gets na niya yung mga unang instructions, saka bigyan ng new sets.

[yapeegurl]

I'm crossing my fingers. So far ok pa itong new house help namin. 1 week pa lang siya. Sa Monday ko pa iimplement ang house rules. I gave her ample time to adjust sa bahay, sa anak namin, sa amin, sa environment. I really hope she'll follow my excel sheet chart.

[greenpease05]

They should or else no reason for them to stay and get a pay. =p

[can_dice]

I am 100% sure na - THEY DON'T all the time.

Most of the time they do, but minsan hindi.

I have a set of instructions nga eh, written down on a board and LAMINATED yet, di parin nasusunod lahat.

[KVsWahmmy]

Nung working ako, parang she does naman.

Pero simula nung naging WAHM ako, at naobserve ko na ang bawat kilos, parang hindi masyado. Nung una oo, walang resistance. Aba, since medyo matagal na sa amin (4 years na this year), nagkakasungay na. May 'lag' na sa pagkilos. Yung tipong pag sinabi mong gawin ito (something as simple as pakikuha nga ng_______, minutes pa ang lilipas bago gawin. Or pag sinabi kong painumin ng vitamins every morning yung bata, ano ka't tanghali na bago mapainom. Saka yung alam mong nagiging moody na. Minsan naririnig ko pang parang ibinabalibag yung mga hinuhugasan purposely. Hindi naman kasi dapat maingay ang paghuhugas di ba? I mean alam mo yung gentle at purposefully noisy. Gusto ko ngang sabihan ng 'Uy hindi ganyan pagbasag ng pinggan, ganito oh' tapos hahagis ko yung pinggan.

Oo alam ko tao din sila at nawawala sa mood... pero naman araw-araw? At may mga moments pa na pag inutusan mo, parang magdadabog pa. Busy ka teh? E tumaba ka na nga dito dahil wala ka naman masyado ginagawa, sagana ka pa sa food. Maayos naman sya magtrabaho. Laki nga lang pinagbago from the time she started kasi matagal-tagal na din dito, masyado na komportable. Kaya kung dati bait-baitan ako talagang tinatarayan ko na. E ano ba kung mas matanda sya sa akin. Nasa lugar naman ang pagtataray ko.

[pinkpotato]

I'm crossing my fingers. So far ok pa itong new house help namin. 1 week pa lang siya. Sa Monday ko pa iimplement ang house rules. I gave her ample time to adjust sa bahay, sa anak namin, sa amin, sa environment. I really hope she'll follow my excel sheet chart.

hows your nanny now?

mikelly - tama yung ginawa mong palitan sya. kakataas kilay. agree ako kay aquacharly.


ours is still okay. shes been with us for almost 3 years. wala ng masyadong instructions, gamay nya na sa bahay. maganda din dito sa kasama namin, when she does wrong and then na question mo baket di nya nagawa, di nya na dala, surely next time di nya na gagawin.