Does marriage counseling help?

[miss resilient]

have you experienced going to a counselor to settle some marital problems? kindly share your experience/s, thanks

[alexispp]

I simply believe that sometimes in a relationship, there must be a middle person who will be objective of the two of you.  Hindi pa ko kasal naniniwala na ko dito.  Minsan kasi mahirap marinig and maintindihan ng partner mo what you have to say, what you mean, and your point.. most of the time kasi each of us becomes defensive of our own points.  That's why it becomes hard to understand.  If somebody can and will sit there to discuss things between the two of you it will be easier to understand, kasi most of the time, the middle person can present the situation better. I hope this helps! 

[miss resilient]

i opened this topic kasi ive noticed that most of the problem na nabasa ko dito sa delicate balance..parang kailangan ng counseling. being a grad of behavioral science ..yun ang nakikita ko.

[delisyus]

yes it does

but only if you're open to it

and only if you commit to it

[miss resilient]

or probably, nahihiya ang ibang couples to admit that theres something wrong with their marriage...

[iyay_08]

For me going to marriage couselling is a big help to make the relationship more stable. If given a chance to have one! why not?

[Joycy]

In my case, it really helps. It saved my marriage. 

I mean, yong time na totally give up na yong hubby ko, ako lang yong nag-ka-counselling.  Although mas okay if both of you will participate, okay lang din ikaw mag-isa (just like me) if in case, ayaw ng partner mo.

The session gave me hope and strength. They told me stories ng mga couples na nagkabalikan who were in worst situation than us. They also taught me how to act around my hubby in everything during those crucial times. 

[aquacharly]

Counseling, I am sure, helps.  Unfortunately,  most men here in the Phils are not receptive to it. 

But I will always encourage women to go see a counselor.  Best to choose one who is competent and non-judgmental.  IMO, I would not want to go to one who's "bottom line" solution is always to hope and pray.  No, sometimes the time for hoping and praying has passed.

At the very least, you will be able to vent and shed some load off your chest.

[miss resilient]

yes, effective. ive known a couple na panay ang bugbugan on their first year of marriage...but after the counseling..although hindi naman instant, nagkasundo rin sila..na reconcile yung differences..atsaka marami pa silang nalaman about each other...kailangan lang talaga i accept na may problem and kailangang maireconcile and differences for marriage to work.

[Tigershark09]

going to a marriage counselor to seek help is also a way of saving your marriage. they have this 'sort of' systematic approach to solve marital problems and they have what you call "sessions" that you have to attend. 

ginagawa na rin naman natin ito noon pa. wala nga lang bayad we go to our parents, elderly relatives, priests, pastors para magpa-counsel. sila yung mga nagpapayo kung paano ba natin aayusin yung problema natin. they give encouragement and support to us also and its also rewarding.

sa tingin ko wala namang best way, whatever works lang talaga. kasi in the end, kayo pa din magasawa ang magdedecide kung willing kayong i-workout ang relationship ninyo. sa US, ang daming marriage counselors pero nag-e-end pa din sa divorce.

[Stellar27]

Kami willing kami ni hubby na mag pa counsel. ngayon nga kung meron sana kayo kilala pa pm naman ng contact Ok nman na kami ni hubby pero gusto pa [textspeak!] namin mas mapa tatag relationship namin bilang mag asawa. grabeh din kasi pinag daanan namin, di ko akalain magkakabalikan nga kami. pero nung panahon na matindi yun unos nag hiwalay kami, nung nagbalikan kami pinanindigan na namin yung isat isa. kaya tinyaga namin pareho na pag usapan ng hindi umiiniit yung ulo yung mga problema namin para unti unti ma settle namin differences namin, it takes two to tango. very thanful ako nag cooperate husband ko na ma save relationship namin.

pero naniniwala ako na mas magiging matatag pa kami if a marriage counselor would be able to help us na mas mapaganda relationship namin bilang mag asawa. madami nag payo samin mag asawa na mag seek nga daw ng help ng marriage counselor para tuloy tuloy na daw.

[xiayou79]

saan ba okay magpa-marriage counseling? actually, the question is okay din kaya kay hubby mag-under go sa marriage counseling.....

[miss resilient]

^pm mo ako kung kailangan ninyo talaga..ok..

[xiayou79]

^thanks sis.....anyways, san po location ninyan.....

sana pumayag si hubby kasi gusto ko talaga...

[Bamzki]

i would love to do attend counselling. yung couples for christ lagi kong nakikita yung banner sa churches..any scheduled marriage counselling na alam ninyo?

share ko lang, nag attend ako sa TALK na generously binigay ni Mr. Anthony Pangilinan about LOVE = Living Our Values Everyday. It was so helpful  talaga ang naalala ko sa topic ay yung cycle why couple falls apart..cycle daw kasi ang nangyayari and dapat ng maputol.. Eto yung sinabi nya: Husband deserves/needs respect from wife..and wife deserves/need love from husband..ang cycle daw kasi..the husbands doesn not show love for the wife and so the respond of the wife is without respect and so on and so on...so dapat daw break it! Husband should love the wife even if she is unloveable many times ( lol) and wife should respect husbands even if he is disrespectful  many many many times ( lol ) so in short, UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.

Hay its so inspiring to attend such talks from someone like Anthony who also admitted that he had ups and downs wiith Maricel ( his wife)..pero GOD is in the center of their relationship so all their doings are in favor of the will of God..

I hope na express ko ng maayus kahit kaunti..To Mr. Pangilinan, thanks so much!

[miss resilient]

^thanks sis.....anyways, san po location ninyan.....

sana pumayag si hubby kasi gusto ko talaga...

in malate manila..pero kung malayo ka dun puede tayong maghanap ng local office ...

[apple28]

Yup maganda toh! mas magiging matatag yung foundation nyo.

especially if may problem kayo, instead of saying to your relatives, friends na  minsan mas lalo nakakadagdag ng problema dahil sa mga Gatong nila..

talk to a counselor... sa church madami nyan...
sayang nga at di pa namin naitutuloy [textspeak!] counseling namin... pero we'll try to finish it...

[anneangel888]

^pm mo ako kung kailangan ninyo talaga..ok..

sis, san ba meron nyan? im interested din kasi... sorry, di pa ko pwede mag pm eh.. TIA.

[trinity94]

i did counseling before... sometimes, it is effective.. sometimes, it is not...

the best counselor is the one who doesnt say much... counseling is merely the opportunity for the husband and the wife to say things they couldnt say to each other when they are together... minsan kasi akala natin talking to your spouse is so easy, but the truth is, we edit our thoughts for the fear that we might say something that might offend and start a fight with our partner...

you dont need a professional counselor if you have someone whom you have always looked up to mediate between you and your husband... never get a relative... you need someone who's going to remain neutral all the way... this is why couples sometimes choose to pay kasi nga mahirap maghanap ng taong neutral...

marriage counseling will not help if there are second thoughts about it... dapat pag pumunta kayo dun, youre both ready to listen to each other, no matter what you hear... and be prepared to be open and honest too... prepare yourself to get hurt... make the conscious effort to rise above all these things... believe that you are doing this because you want a better marriage...

[cgirl]

Meron din bang counseling for mag bf/gf or sa mga ikakasal pa lang? Expensive ba sila?