Husband na walang pakialam

[aquacharly]

Although i think, i was  prep early to be a military wife because cadet pa lang sa PMA si hubby ay bf ko na sya. He's in baguio and im here in manila for the duration of our bf/gf days. Nun pa lang we are always apart na. But i visit him regularly (once a month),  almost no fail yun. Then pag may friends akong aakyat ng Baguio, i prepare food/things na ipapadala sa kanya sa loob.  after we got married, yung visit visit is  parang extension lang ng ginagawa ko

Lolz, K_HEART - Baka nagkasabay  pa tayo sa PMA events.    I backed out -- could not see myself as a happy military wife.    Chicken. hehe.   If he didn't get killed within 3 months after March Week - while on duty in Mindanao -  he just may have won over my fears.   ah, di kasama  mo ko sa ladies' association.

Going back to the issue at hand, IMO, military wives really have  a lot of adjusting and coping to do. A common complaint of wives is that child rearing is unevenly shared.  Parang hindi sila naturuan? Or hindi na nila kaya? Maging hands-on?  My Lolo was a general, kaya yun  ang ngakngak ng Lola Ko.  Now, military wives -- sa observation ko,  are usually strong women, very confident & self-reliant.  (di ba dyan nag umpisa yang : si Commander... Hehe).   So, they are able to do it alone.  Eventually pag grown na kid -- 6 or 7? Magaling sila maki-bonding na with their kids. Sa babies lang siguro clueless.   

[k_heart]

^Uy sis Aquacharly, may ex ka na Ayer???ha!ha! aha,ex-KG ka! he!he! Tama ba ang intindi ko, he passed away na? wahhhh! or mali ang understanding ko?

ha!ha! In fairness sis, i can say that i'm a happy military wife. Siguro din dahil pareho kaming busy and we keep irregular hours or working sked.  Kaya minsan mas busy pa ako sa hubby ko,ha!ha! pero ang good naman dun, talagang we set aside times for family  bonding/ activities. And we really miss each other kaya we maximized pag magakakasama.

Iba-iba rin kasi yung mga guys, yung hubby ko has a real affinity sa kids.Kahit nung babies pa sila, tuwang tuwa na sya kahit di ko sya naturuang mag palit ng diapers or magtimpla ng milk. Pero magaling magbuhat ng kids at magaling magpainom ng gamot/vitamins.
 And yes, pag mas malalaki na ang kids mas madali silang maka-relate at makipag bonding, like
for example sa mga amusement parks, sya ang kasama sa mga rides at ako yung chicken na nakaupo lang sa mga benches.he!he!
It's also up to the wife na i-educate yung husband sa dapat nyang gawin kapag  magkakasama kami. in my case, i actually dictate to my husband. he doesn't mind naman, for him, it simplifies his life if i just tell him what he needs to do and what i want. Pero with sweetness naman yung pagiging dictator. ha!ha! Paminsan minsan ko lang sya inaaway. Kasi dahil malayo sa family most of the time, sometimes hindi rin nila masyadong alam kung ano yung mga study habits or sleeping habits or whatever habits ng kids and family. So its up to the wife to educate or remind him.
HMmm, naintriga ako kung sino ang lolo mo sis. Nakahanap na din ako ng iba pang GT sisses na pmaers din ang mga hubby pero pareho ng nasa airline industry. I'm sure kilala mo sila sis! : )

Para hindi OT:
Sis Iluvmysoldier, basat tyagain mo your hubby lalo na at umamin sya na medyo hindi sya ok ngayon psychologically. Just be there for him at wag mo na awayin at tikisin. be a loving wife and set aside mo na yung mga hurts at resentments na nararamdaman mo. As a military wife dapat mas broad-minded tayo. And just like what sis aquacharly have said,tayo talaga ang dapat mag-adjust at mag-cope. Medyo iba din kasi ang trabaho ng mga hubbies natin. And yes, educate him! : )
 

[iluvmysoldier]

Thank you sa mga advice sis k_heart and sis aquacharly. Sige i will try a different approach kay hubby paguwi niya. Kahit mga subtle changes lang siguro para hindi naman siya masyado manibago.
Natatawa lang ako sa sarili ko, iba pala talaga pag may anak na. Lumalambot ang puso kaya affected agad pag may issue. Hindi katulad dati na kaya ko siyang paikutin. lol Siguro nga ako dapat talaga yung mas nakakaintindi considering na pareho naman kaming galing sa academy. So alam ko talaga kung anong klaseng buhay ang pinasok ko. Pero yun nga, mas madaling sabihin at iba talaga pag ako mismo ang involved. Sana eventually, maging maayos din ang lahat 

[aquacharly]

K_HEART - yeah, he got ambushed in Mindanao.  Somebody was always courting, Pero napansin ko, yang samahan nila --- Hindi sila magsasabay. Lols..  This 1 - he took his sweet time. But every time he got down to Manila - I would drop everything to spend time with him. Big deal yon kasi I was still in my teens, had a bf (Pero sobra restricted time namin by parents - Pero sya como Ayer -- anything goes kasi trustworthy daw, Lols).  -  events, school work heavy.    Doon ko naisip, this can't be my life -- erratic scheds.  (tignan mo kat@ngahan ng immature -susko, erratic sched din due to business demands  namin in hubby --   - we can't plan vacations much in advance).  At his wake - his mom told all to me. Na he would make sure I do fall really in love  with him. So yon. 
    Before, I did not believe in ghosts. Well, about a month after he departed, omgrief -- he was there by my bedroom door - the lights were all on but that part of him with the fatal  shots - black, no features.      I used to go visit him at the Libingan every 2 years or so -- alone, when I can takas and drive myself, alone.    Now, it is easier, coz I slip away lang when we visit my Lolo who is  buried there - sa Generals' Section.  Teka, hindi  yan si Angelo Reyes ha.  .

ILUVMYSOLDIER -- if that is your real photo -- I have long noted that ang dating eh talagang confident.  Baka may post natal depression ka pa -- since you say dati hindi  ka sensitive.  Some have it for years.   IMO, kayang kaya mo pa rin paikutin si hubby mo.  Yon lang! advice ng mga Ate mo - K HEART & me --  do it with positive strokes.  Remove mo sa mindset nya anything negative he may associate with you... As in, wala syang cuentang dad.   

[k_heart]

^awwww,sis Aquacharly, nateary-eyed naman ako sa story mo. I'm a romantic by heart. and i can realate sa drop everything pag dumating na sya. Like today, pauwi yung hubby ko from the camp. Eh may nakasched pala akong meeting tonight. Naku, i told my staff, na sya na lang makipag meeting kahit importante yungbkameeting.ha!ha!ha!
 Mukhang nain-love ka rin talaga sa kanya. But i'm glad that you have found also your true love, your hubby! : )

Sis Iluvmysoldier, kaya mo yan. And lucky you, si sis Aquacharly ang nag aadvise sa yo, the best adviser yan dito, pwede ng mag open ng sarili nyang column sa newspaper.he!he!

[iluvmysoldier]

^Thank you so much mga sis, oo nga sobrang nakakabilib mga advice ni sis aquacharly, may pinaghuhugutan talaga. Fan ako ng mga posts mo eh, basta pag ikaw na nagbigay ng advice, laging may katuturan  Big help talaga sa mga tulad kong bata pa at wala pa masyadong experience sa married life.

Siguro nga baka part pa to ng post partum depression. Pero sinusubukan ko bumalik sa dati mga sis, start ako by taking care of myself ulit. Medyo nabubusy na din sa business namin kaya less time for emo time. Sinuggest din pala ng pedia na pag nandito si hubby subukan kong umalis para iwanan ko silang dalawa.  Mapipilitan silang magbonding without me.  Hindi ko na rin aawayin at susumbatan si hubby. No expectations na lang para walang samaan ng loob. Baka kasi may iba siyang way para ipakita ang affection niya, pinangunahan ko lang.

And yes, ako po talaga yan sa profile pic. 

[justin3]

Waaaaah! nagkita ang mga Kaydet Gurls dito.
isama nyo si LTC december dito para masaya at para mabuo na ang 1st front squad ng GT platoon, INDIA Company. si K_heart ang squad leader nyo.

Gademmit! LTC iluvmysoldier, complaining ka ah. kung di mo kaya si Major hubby, pag-reportin mo at i-indorse sya kay COL k_heart in athletic uniform with combat shoes, with full combat pack para mag mase-mase, mess to mess. siguradong titino yon pag nakatikim pa ng extra viand kay LTC Aqua.

[weweng20]

baka naman meron na xang ibang pinagkakaabalahan hehe .. ibang gurl