After discovering that he cheated, how did u move on? ok pa kayo or hindi na?

[eimerej5]

Yes i know it's been a long time... And we are alright... May moments lang talaga na bigla na lang naaalala ko yung nangyari then bigla na lang nandun na ulit yung pain... And knowing that the girl is just there, they still work together. Buti nga not in the same building na but he still goes to the girl's building kapag may need gawin dun and they are together in the same department kapag nandun siya at saka sa hubby ko pa din ngcoconfine yung girl about her problems!

Hindi ko na lang inaaway si hubby kasi kinukwento naman niya sa akin. Baka kapag inaway ko eh maglihim pa...  Hindi na siya magkwento...

[kim28]

Hi mga sis

kakahiwalay ko lang kay husband last December 2015 iniwan nya ako for other woman. Sobrang sakit btw, Feb same year nawala baby namin.  So isipin mo 2015 nawalan ka na ng anak pati asawa sobrang sakit at hirap dinanas ko.

Until now sila pa din ng kabit nya.  Ako eto medyo ok na pero yung sakit araw araw nararamdaman ko pa din.  Block ako sa lahat sa mobile phone nya, viber, fb, whats app at lahat na.  Alam nyo till now umaasa ako na magiging ok kami ang hirap bumitaw kahit sobrang nasasaktan ka na. I always include the kabit and my husband in my prayer everyday.  I even read blog about marriage restoration.

Now I am pregnant nagkita pa kami last month siguro dun nabuo.  Mukhang ayaw din naman nya sa baby ko kasi dedma lang sya.  Iba talaga plano ni God dati hirap na hirap kami sa TTC journey namin. Now kung kailan hiwalay kami saka kami biniyaan ng baby.  Pero sobrang saya ko nung nalaman ko na pregnant ako akala ko wala ng happiness akong mararamdaman sa buhay ko at puro sakit, hirap at sacrifices na lang.

Kung maayos o hindi man maayos ang marriage ko - I am happy na magkakababy na kami. Sa magiging baby na lang namin ko ibubuhos lahat ng attention at oras ko.  Hirap ng one sided na pagmamahal lagi ka lang nasasaktan.

I lift up everything to God kung ano plan nya in His perfect time.

[badw33d]

^your new journey is starting, a very long way to go. You need to be with family, good friends who can support you. It's not going to be easy, single parent and everything. You will have to be strong, happy thoughts. As early as now, please seek guidance from good people, you will need it.

then again, your friends here will always be here to give you guidance :-)

[yammie_yam]

Hi sissies, i wanna share my own story pero after na to na madiscover ko. Na meron siyang katextmate at naging girlfriend na girl and it turns out na isa palang GRO sa isang bar sa pasay,,
After the away and confrontations hindi talaga siya umaamin, he never. Said "sorry" pero gumagawa siya ng effort lagi na kaming nagsisimba. Kumbaga action speakslouder than words" even sa bed bumalik na rin ang init niya,,,

On my part hirap pa rin ako maka move on, minsan naiisip ko pa rin yung ginawa niya, nawalana yung 50 % na trust ang hirap ibalik ,paranoid pa nga ko minsan kapag ako lang magisa madalas ko maalala, hindi rin naman kasi siya nageeffort parakausapin ako ng heart to heart hindi ko na alam kung ano iniisip niya , he never opens ,naghuhulaan nalang siguro kami , minsan napapagod na rin ako mag isip lalo na kapag nakakaramdam ako ng sakit sa dibdib, i wanna run away kahit two days lang yung ako lang mag-isa kaso, pano ang anak ko,,

[glamorosa_09]

saka sa hubby ko pa din ngcoconfine yung girl about her problems!

Seems like your husband is still playing with fire... won't he get burned again? Tsk. Dapat kung wala nang business sa isa't isa, wala nang usap-usap. It will be really hard for you to completely move on.

Kawalan ba sa buhay nya na hindi pakinggan ang mga hinaing ng babae?

I wonder how difficult it is for other couples to put boundaries in their marriage. Mahirap ba ito? O merong isang takot na mainconvenience yung asawa nya? Takot to fight for her right, kasi takot baka iwanan?

Hindi ko na lang inaaway si hubby kasi kinukwento naman niya sa akin. Baka kapag inaway ko eh maglihim pa...  Hindi na siya magkwento...

So this is how you're gonna play it. Nahihirapan ako para sayo.

Hindi mo sya kailangang awayin. Parang i-educate mo lang sya. Like, "you know hon, I read from this article, na this can lead to that... etc."

[alexmack]

I admire women who stood strong in spite of everything that has happened and managed to move on kahit nasaktan.

Naranasan ko din yan mga sis sa current bf ko, now fiance. We've been together for 11 years and he cheated on me twice. 3 years pa lang kami that time. I caught him on both times and I also wanted break up with him but he doesn't want to let go of me so he ended his affair with those women immediately naman. Pero yung trust hindi ko na naibalik ng buo kasi lagi na lang akong duda sa kanya. I can't help it, nagawa na nya dati so kaya pa rin nyang gawin ulit. Then last December, umuwi ako sa province namin to spend christmas at pagbalik ko, it felt different na. At dahil masyado akong sensitive sa mga kilos nya, inisip ko na agad na may something na naman. So one night, while he was sleeping, nagbasa ako ng mga messages sa phone nya particularly yung convo nya with his guy bestfriend at yun na nga, para akong hindi huminga ng ilang segundo dahil sa nabasa ko. The convo was about their supposedly inuman on christmas eve na hindi natuloy kasi hindi dumating yung classmate nilang babae na manlilibre daw. Ang alam ko marami sila pero parang puro lalaki at yun lang ang babae. Single mom sya and ang alam ko lagi syang nanghihiram ng pera sa bf ko at sa guy friend nga na katext nya. Hindi natuloy ang inuman but i guess tuloy ang exchanging of text messages ni fiance at girl at nagplano pang magkita on the 26th at may balak pala si fiance na ayain sa motel yung girl (based sa convo pa rin ni fiance at guy friend kasi deleted na yung convo ni fiance at girl). It broke my heart. After 7 years na nanahimik si fiance, eto na naman sya. Napalakas yung iyak ko kaya sya nagising at sinabi ko sa kanya na alam ko na yung usapan nila ng guy friend nya who happens to become my friend also kasi matagal ko na din namang kilala. Hindi ko akalain na magsasuggest si guy friend na ituloy na lang yung pagkikita next time, mag set na lang sa ibang araw. That night gusto ko nang maghiwalay kami and because he's staying at my house, pinalayas ko sya. Hindi sya umalis kasi pinilit nyang mag-usap kami. To cut it short, nagkaayos kami pero siguro two days ko syang hindi gaanong pinapansin kahit magkasama kami sa bahay. I prayed hard and asked God to give me signs kung anong dapat kong gawin kasi kahit gusto kong maghiwalay na lang kami, nangingibabaw din naman yung love ko for him. Hindi ko nga lang alam kung deserve pa nya ang isa pang chance pero pinagbigyan ko sya.

Come January, we started talking about the wedding plans. No wedding proposal, no engagement ring. At hindi ko alam kung tama bang magpakasal ako sa kanya after all that has happened. Honestly, I became so scared kasi baka after ng wedding mangyari din sakin yung nangyari sa isang sis natin dito na nagka-affair agad si hubby nya three months after their wedding. Hindi ko mapigilan ang mag-isip lalo na during wedding preps tapos bigla akong matitigilan at mapapaisip kung tama ba tong ginagawa ko. Are we ready? I must admit, malungkot pa rin ako at nag-aalala.

[glamorosa_09]

^Actually hindi ako naniniwala sa once a cheater, always a cheater. Some people are capable of learning their lesson.

Pero in my observation, twice a cheater, forever and ever will be a cheater. Lalo na pag thrice. It's not about learning their lesson, it's about cheating as ingrained in their person.

Obvious naman sis what decision will save you from a lifetime of misery. Pag-usapin mo ang isip at puso mo. I bet your mind knows what's the right thing to do. But most probably, you're gonna follow your heart.

[alexmack]

^you're right sis, alam kong dapat hindi ko na lang sya pinagbigyan ulit but as usual, nangibabaw ang gusto ng puso ko. Letting go was never easy kaya tuloy nahayaan kong gawin nya sakin ng paulit-ulit yun. And for a time, I felt I lost respect for myself.

Our wedding will be in Dec next year at marami pa akong time para mag-isip at timbangin ang mga bagay-bagay. Haven't booked any of the suppliers na rin kasi takot ako na masayang yung ibabayad namin kung bago dumating yung araw ng kasal e marealize namin na hindi talaga kami para sa isa't isa.

[j.adore]

Sorry nakakainit kasi ng ulo

alexmack, unless your partner shows any sign of remorse, parang awa mo na, stop it!
Life is too short to waste it being miserable. And worse, if you have a family with this person, imagine what misery your future children awaits!

And unfriend that guy! Good friends are supposed to be looking out for their friends to be better people.

[thea_girl]

Our wedding will be in Dec next year at marami pa akong time para mag-isip at timbangin ang mga bagay-bagay. Haven't booked any of the suppliers na rin kasi takot ako na masayang yung ibabayad namin kung bago dumating yung araw ng kasal e marealize namin na hindi talaga kami para sa isa't isa.

Yes madami ka pa time to think. Imagine hindi mo pa sya asawa ha, mas madami pang pwedeng mangyari. Ang hirap pumasok sa isang sitwasyon then pagsisisihan mo lang sa huli, maybe meron pang ibang guy na mas deserving sa love mo. But still you have to think talaga sabi mo nga mahal mo sya, it's up to you, but it does not guantee na walang possiblity na mag cheat ulit. 

[simang]

Alexmack, basta for me, doubt means no.

But iff you really, really want to work out your relationship with your fiance, then the best thing to do is to start in a clean slate. It may sound unrealistic pero kung talagang gusto mo itong lalaking ito, you have to forgive and forget, and learn to trust him 100% again. Ang tendency kasi if you get married eventually and laging nasa isip mo yung ginawa nya, you'll blame him everytime. So kelangan mo kalimutan yun kung gusto mo sya pakasalan so you can start fresh.

Ito lang napapansin ko in most girls.. Once a guy talks about marriage, or worse did a grand proposal, it's as if nawawala lahat ng mga kasalanan nila in the past, na it's the ultimate gesture of love. When in fact, you'll know if he loves you with how he treats you every single day. If ilang beses ka na niloko, parang nagiging ideal man sya bigla pag nagpropose.

[latte]

Yes I totally agree with sis simang

Sabi nga nun isang counsellor  I forgot the name even the the slightest doubt kahit bukas na ang wedding wag pa din magpakasal. I had a very big doubt nun magpapa kasal ako plus very stressful din, i already know when in doubt don't get married Pero nagpa kasal pa din ako, ayun nga kaka kasal pa Lang namin May malaking na kaming away because of his being jealous na Wala naman basis. Tapos emotional abuse. Tapos itong huli betrayal. Hayst! I should have followed my instinct then.

 Pero ok naman na ko ngayon. I believe destiny has to play its role and it has to happen because of the lesson that both of us must learn.

[Girltalker2]

Kung Yung mga sure na sure na gusto magpakasal eh minsan na uuwi parin sa hiwalayan, what more if you're in doubt?

Kung walang trust, totoo sabi nila, it will be a life of hell. Problem mo pa sa pinas, no second chances unless you're willing to waste more time filing annulment, not to mention cash din.

[Msfi]

^a prof once told us in case of doubt even if it's during the ceremony magpahimatay ka daw. If you realize you want to still get married then gumising ka. If not, itulog mo na until i alis ka na sa simbahan.

[Miss Granger]

 - his sis alex, me too i believe na if you're in doubt then don't. Marriage will be a lifetime commitment so kelangan pag nangyari yun buong buo na ulit ang trust and love mo sa kanya. Why don't you give yourself a break, think about it. Hindi naman guarantee na asawa muna siya then matatalikuran niya na lahat nang nangyari sa past. He needs to rebuild your respect and you should tell him what you really feel.

- isa pa un bestfriend niya ha, kaibigan niyo ba yun pareho kasi parang hindi. Alam naman niyang attach ang friend tapos dina drag niya pa sa mga ganyan. 

[kim28]

Bakit ba ang hirap mag moved on

Kailan ba magiging manhid o mawala yung love/feelings ko sa asawa ko? kahit sobrang sakit ng ginagawa nya bakit mahal ko pa rin.

Sis ilang months o years ba bago maaccept na eto talaga mas pinili ni husband ang OW kaysa sa amin ng baby ko. Ang hirap everyday struggle ko pag gising sa umaga dun ko nararamdaman na nag iisa ako.

[simang]

^hope you're doing well, kim28.

Honestly the only way to move on is to consciously do it everyday. Walang makakapagsabi how long will it take, pero if you decide to move on every waking day, then you're already getting there.

[kim28]

^ thanks sis simang

laki ng natulong ng GT sa akin

Sis kayang kaya to wala naman akong ibang choice kung di accept and let go.  May time na naiisip pero pilitin ko magpakabusy sa work at kay baby Nakakaasar nga pati sa panaginip ko nakikita ko sila ahahhaha

Someday mag post din ako na ok na ok na ako at tatawanan ko na lang lahat ng katanga*** na nagawa ko in the name of LOVE

[yeng08]

^ tama yan sis kim28. Positive ka lang, malalagpasan mo yan SOON. 

[alexmack]

I'd like to say thanks to everyone who gave their advices/opinions regarding my experience.

I asked the Lord for a sign kung para ba sya sa akin o hindi pala. Naghihintay pa rin mga sis.