Hi sissies,
I'm very new here. As a matter of fact, this is my first post. I just can't help but share the same emotions with the rest of the women here. My hubby and I have been married for 10 years now. I'd say he was the ideal husband. We went out for 6 years before we decided to get married. We've been friends since elementary and high school so magkakilala [textspeak!] kami. Before we became lovers, we were friends at first.
My nightmare started a yr and a month. I started to notice 'indifference' from my husband -- lagi syang tulala; if I asked him what was bothering him, he wld jst say, 'wala naman. work lang'; he treated me at a different way. He wasn't at all rude or anything like that. I just sensed that something was awfully different. Then it came to a point that even our sex life got affected. Three times, yes, three times, he went SOFTEE! I cried. I cried because I already had some strong feelings kicking inside of me. The changes went on...Then for some reasons, habang nag-ga-garden ako, bigla na lang akong tumayo and checked on his email (which I never do, by the way). Then, that's when I saw the email exchange between him and his ex-girlfriend (ex-ofcmate nya rin)
The email showed their discussion about the girl not telling everything naman daw (so obviously nag-usap muna sila). Then hubby asked, why wouldn't you tell me everything when you don't keep anything from me? then it was even my hubby who asked 'Why don't we just go in a motel and talk about it?' -- AYUN NA!
I confronted him and the only explanation he could give me was that, 'Nagbibiruan lang daw sila." I felt very stupid to be given that very, very lame reason. Rewind lang mga sis, there had been incidents before where I caught some 'sweet nothings' na text msgs between them (2005 -2006) but I did not react much. I'm not the very jealous type. Sabi ko lang, make sure na tigilan na yon or else, mag-aaway na kami. He promised to do as agreed. I was back to normal. Then I saw another text msg from the same ex, asking 'Tuloy ba tayong nood sa Friday?'. Dito, nagalit na ko. Nag-away kmi. then nagsumamo sya, mega-iyak pa na kahit ano pa mangyari, never nya kakausapin na yung girl na yon even if it was the girl who initiated the call or [textspeak!]. Tapos, yun nga, nakita ko yung email.
Is your relationship still ok? Are you still together?
Yes, we are still together, but I'm no longer the same person. I'm seriously considering separation kaya lang, we have two very small kids. Sobrang hirap din pala magdecide when there are kids involved. My husband, by the way, is not the irresponsible type. Actually, he's the opposite of irresponsible esp to his kids.
Do you still feel the pain of what happened?
Yes. As if it happened yesterday. I'm not the suspicious type. Pero when I saw that solid proof, parang there was not a day that I didn't doubt him.
Do you still trust him after that? what did you do to bring the trust back?
I'm not sure if I can trust him again. Like I said, I'm not a very jealous person and I trusted my husband fully so when my trust to him was broken, it was totally shattered.
do you still feel that maybe he is still with someone else or still with the old sl*t that broke your trust and faith in him?
Yes, a lot of times. Our set-up is that my kids and I are in the province and he goes home regularly every weekend. In Manila, he lives with our friend (+ his wife and kid). These people are very, very close to us like siblings.
Up to this time, he still hasn't admitted anything to me yet and still wanted me to buy his story na, 'biruan' lang daw nila yon. I called the girl. Parehas sila ng istorya. I dont believe either one of them. It's been a year and a month, but it feels like it was just yesterday....
It's sad that these things had to happen... s*** happens, indeed.