REBOUND RELATIONSHIP

[Miss Taken]

help guys.

this is my story...siguro in less than 3 months after the breakup, i decided to have a "deeper friend relationship" with this guy. after all, naglalandi landi na din naman sya sakin before kahit nung kami pa ni ex. the problem is...he is on a long term relationship naman na. he's engaged and getting married next year. haha. that is why nacontrol ko sarili ko na wag mafall sakanya. which is good. i know mali kasi if ever, nakasira pa ako ng relationship. but then, wala eh. ang selfish ko. -.- kinarma na din naman siguro ako (haha). kasi after that fling fling with him, at the end of the day. i am still broken with my ex. hindi nakatulong sa totoo lang. now, i cut our communication na. saka nalang siguro ako magpaparamdam kapag kasal na sya. afterall, wala naman akong sama ng loob sakanya.

Sis ask ko lang, what's the point of communicating with this guy again? Based on your story, he doesn't have good intentions for you and he even had the nerve to flirt with you even if he's already in a relationship. Tsk tsk. It's better if you just forget or ignore him cause he's just gonna give negative vibes in your life.

at present, i am "kinda" in a relationship with this other guy (10months after the breakup). and this time, gusto ko na ng seryosohan. -.- we started wrong...NA NAMAN kasi he's on a relationship na naman. pero saglit palang daw sila. i guess, less than half a year palang. hays. kaya natatakot ako na mafall sakanya ng lubusan. pero ang sweet nya and i think, he's serious with me. he came from a 6-yr relationship before which ended sa niloko sya ng girl at iniwan. so, MEJO praning ako. -.-.

I agree with three8one. No matter how long or short their relationship, the point here is that he's already seeing someone else, he's already taken. How can you say na he's serious when you're not the only girl in his life? Are you just going to settle as an option?

If he really wants to be with you then dapat hiwalayan niya yung current gf niya. Hindi yung pinagsasabay niya kayong dalawa. That's already cheating. That's a clear warning sign for you sis.

am i the rebound? or rebound ko pa din ba sya? or what?.

No you're not a rebound but both guys are treating you as their back up plan.

"Rebound relationship is the relationship you enter right AFTER a break-up." -  It means na before entering a new one, tapos na yung una. Yung dalawang guy di ba they're still both in a relationship so they're just flirting or probably testing the waters to see how far can you go.

[j.adore]

Sorry but I don't see anything good coming out of being in any sort of relationship with taken men.

Why not just focus on yourself until the right person comes along?

[akosimaiatot]

Sorry but I don't see anything good coming out of being in any sort of relationship with taken men.

Why not just focus on yourself until the right person comes along?

I agree ,why settle for less than you deserve when you can find someone who is very much single and can give you a non-complicated relationship..sabi nga nila all we need to do is wait

[pretty_B]

Sis three8one, 1) si 2nd guy ba tinutukoy mo? siguro less than 5 or 6 months palang sila. LDR sila kaya ata tinamlayan siya sa gf nya. 2) about sa pagpili, di ko naman option si 1st guy kasi nga natatakot din ako sa karma. abah marrying age na yun at long term relp sila ng gf nya. 3) paano ko nasabi na seryoso sya? hmmm. thru words lang. hays. pero somewhat "pinapakilala" na din nya ako sa family nya. sinasabi din nya kasi na break na sila nung isa, kahit alam kong hindi pa.

Sis Miss Taken, 1) actually sis, para ko na din kasi syang kuya. halos 10yrs ang age gap namin. -.- and ang honest lang namin sa isa't isa. actually, hindi ko na sya cinoconsider as someone i can have a romantic thing with. kumbaga, teacher ko sya sa mga bagay bagay. and he knows about this 2nd guy. 2) actually sis, hindi na nya cinocontact si gf. well, naniniwala naman ako sakanya. -.- nakikita ko thru fb na laging deadma sya sa mga comments and posts ni gf. and ang communication namin continuous naman. -.- mejo naiinis lang ako kung minsan kasi, lagi nyang sinasabi na onting hintay nalang daw. hindi nya kasi kaya ibreak si gf. hinihintay nya ata na si gf ang makipagbreak sakanya. 3) yes, agree naman ako. mukha ngang backup plan ako.

Sis j.adore and Sis akosimaiatot, thanks sisters. :*

thanks sa replies girls!

[cosmochick]

Yes, I've had one and had hurt him in the process. I was really broken from my break up that time.Broken and lonely then he was there. Super mabait and he was  at my beck and call. I was not attracted to him but he was at that time what I needed. A companion. I know. I was selfish. My best friend had warned him that I was still not over my ex but go pa rin sya. He was really serious about me.

It started ok then it became turbulent, lagi ko sya inaaway. There were times na bigla ko sya di kakausapin in the middle of our date. Maldita talaga ako. We broke up and he never talked to me since then.

Sad, because I lost a good friend because of that. He's one of the kindest guy I know...and super bait din ng parents nya sakin. I never had the chance to say sorry though. Oh well....

That goes without saying, I'm not against rebound relationships. If it helps you get over the break up then go.. Just keep it light and fun. If you know that rebound lang to for you and the other party wants more.. maghanap ka na lang ng ibang rebound or pagkakaabalahan like a hobby/sports...thats what I did after the rebound....and believe me it was more fun.

[Miss Taken]

Sis pretty_B It doesn't matter kung ano man gawin ni 2nd guy eh since sila pa rin nung gf niya. The only reason na nakikita ko kaya hindi niya kayang makipaghiwalay kasi he's not sure kung ano ba talaga feelings niya for you. Sabi mo di ba LDR lang sila, napupunuan mo lang yung void sa heart niya na hindi nabibigay ni gf.

But that's so unfair. Isipin mo na lang sis kung ikaw yung nasa posisyon ng gf, how would you feel knowing that your bf is flirting with another girl?

Don't invest in something na alam mong masasaktan ka lang. Think about what will happen in the long run.

[pretty_B]

^thanks sis. naguguilty din naman ako kay gf. pero wala eh. tinamaan ako eh. -.- bago bago palang naman kami ni guy, kaya binibigyan ko pa sya ng chance na tuparin sinabi nya na makikipagbreak na sya. actually, kagabi sinabi nya na this week na daw yung hinihintay ko. -.- we'll see. waaa.

OT na sorry. back to the topic, my guy best friend, who knew about this thing i am having with this guy, is convinced na rebound ko daw ito. for me hindi naman. kasi ang naiisip ko sa rebound is...more on nasa receiving side ka. like, mas mahal ka nya and ikaw hindi mo sya ganoon kamahal. ganun. -.-

[TomHansen]

^ ok lang pretty_B as long as masaya ka sa ginagawa mo, you only live once kaya matapakan na ang dapat matapakan, masaktan na ang dapat masaktan, agawin na ang dapat agawin diba.. - you deserve each other..

[three8one]

^thanks sis. naguguilty din naman ako kay gf. pero wala eh. tinamaan ako eh. -.- bago bago palang naman kami ni guy, kaya binibigyan ko pa sya ng chance na tuparin sinabi nya na makikipagbreak na sya. actually, kagabi sinabi nya na this week na daw yung hinihintay ko. -.- we'll see. waaa.

i don't mean anything...parang ang hirap lang intindihin ng dahilan mo. walang pinag iba sa gustong mangyari ng mga kabitch na sana maintindihan din daw sila kaya nila nagawa na mang agaw ng iba... tipong, dahil sobra sobra sila mag mahal, pati mahal ng iba minahal na din nila. hehe!

kung totoo yung sinasabi ni guy na iiwan nya na yung current gf nya within this week, hindi malayong magawa nya din yan sayo pag hindi na naman sya nakontento sa magiging relasyon nyo.

just my two cents.

[pretty_B]

^ ok lang pretty_B as long as masaya ka sa ginagawa mo, you only live once kaya matapakan na ang dapat matapakan, masaktan na ang dapat masaktan, agawin na ang dapat agawin diba.. - you deserve each other..

intense tomhansen! bwaha.

i don't mean anything...parang ang hirap lang intindihin ng dahilan mo. walang pinag iba sa gustong mangyari ng mga kabitch na sana maintindihan din daw sila kaya nila nagawa na mang agaw ng iba... tipong, dahil sobra sobra sila mag mahal, pati mahal ng iba minahal na din nila. hehe!

kung totoo yung sinasabi ni guy na iiwan nya na yung current gf nya within this week, hindi malayong magawa nya din yan sayo pag hindi na naman sya nakontento sa magiging relasyon nyo.

just my two cents.

haha. thanks for the reply. i know sis, malamang sa malamang kayang kaya nya gawin sa akin itong ginagawa nya sa gf nya. pag ganun, karma is a b**** talaga. hehe. 

[TomHansen]

^ haha sorry naman.

[alice_alice]

Mine statrted as a rebound. My ex and I broke up and there he was comforting me. After 2 wks I decided to give this guy a chance told him from the very start na we are just doin' a trial and error sort of thing. Na if it doesn't work magsplit na kame and if it does then good tuloy naten. I'm still not over my ex back then, but since nagkabf ako agad di na ako masyado nagfocus sa ex ko wala na akong time magemote or umiyak kasi nga nabaling atensyon ko sa iba. Mahirap magadjust pero nakayanan naman hanggang sa hinde ko na mahal ang ex ko tapos inlove na talaga ako sa bf ko.

2 yrs and 10mos later we're still together. Rebounds aren't a waste of time. Sometimes may happy endings din naman.