Sibling rivalry

[jjqxiv]

Mommies, how do you handle this?

Actually I don't know if this is considered as rivalry but my youngest daughter's being competitive with her baby brother, she's 10 by the way. Ever since I gave birth, mas naging worse yung attitude nya. Nung pregnant pa lang ako I know she's jealous but I tried to involve her in my pregnancy kaso no effect pa din. I always remind her that she's still our baby and we love her the same kahit dumating na yung baby brother nya. Yes, wala ako lagi sa bahay but as much as possible gusto ko syang makita before sya pumasok sa school. Recently lang nagkalat/tinapunan nya ng paint yung nursery ng baby brother nya kasi mas maganda daw sa room nya, she became the "mean girl" of her school, etc. Feeling ko gumagawa nlang sya ng mali para mapansin ko sya. Nasigawan ko na sya but never ko pa nman sya nasaktan na physically. Yung daddy nman nila, msyadong focused sa new baby kaya feeling sguro ng daughter namin out of the picture na sya.

I don't know what to do anymore, na-try ko na nman sguro lahat ng pwede kong gawin but hindi pa din enough. I try to control my temper para hindi ko sya mpagalitan ng sobra but I'm really really stressed kaya hindi ko na maiwasan. Any tips and suggestion sissies? Thank you so much.

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[EllaBratin]

Hi sis. Congrats, nanganak ka na pala 

Anyway, 7 years old ang daughter ko nung pinanganak ko yung son ko. Dumaan din siya sa stage ng "selos" as in sinabihan niya ako ng "lagi na lang si "baby brother" ang ibinibili" tapos yung exams niya ang bababa ng score. Umiyak nga ako nun e, kasi di ko rin alam ang gagawin ko.

Kinausap ko na lang siya, pinaliwanag ko ang needs ng isang baby at ganun din naman ang ginagawa ko sa kanya dati. Tapos minsan siya ang pinagtitimpla ko ng milk, pinapakuha ko ng damit at laruan. Hanggang sa na-enjoy na niya ang pagiging Ate.
Naalala ko nung buntis pa lang ako, sabi niya sa akin "Mommy sa totoo lang ayaw ko ng kapatid" pero ngayon ang sinasabi niya e love daw niya si little brother niya.

Kausapin mo lang siya sis para mai-open niya rin kung ano ang nararamdaman niya, para di siya magtanim ng sama ng loob sa baby brother niya.

[jjqxiv]

Naku mommies, ngayon pinatawag na nman kami ng discipline coordinator sa school nila because of her unnecessary actions. I talked to her after, explained everything but it seems like hindi pa din effective kasi I don't think she's willing to "change" her attitude.

Sis amethyst028, spoiled brat yung daughter ko sis. I agree with you and sis gorgeous gal, age gap is the number one reason. Kahit anong pakiusap yung gawin ko, "NO" lagi yung sagot eh. Her sisters tried to talk to her too, kaso iniisip nya nman dun sa baby brother "kampi" yung ates nya. Gnamit na nya na nman yung famous line nya na "You don't love me anymore." Yung daddy kasi nya, twice na ata syang napalo. But anyway, thanks for the advises and tips! I will try and try hanggang ma-convince ko sya. Hindi pa namin sya ma-involve activities ng baby brother nya since nasa NICU pa sya but hopefully paglabas nya, maging okay na lahat.

Sis EllaBratin, hello sis! Yes, I gave birth last July 19. Nung pregnant pa lang ako lagi na nyang snasabi na ayaw nya din ng baby sibling, dumating na kami sa point na gmagawa na sya ng ways nya para makunan ako nun. Ibang klase talaga tong anak ko eh, grabe. Anyway, I will try to talk to her again. This time mas heart to heart nman. Hopefully ma-enjoy nya yung pagiging ate once her little brother's out in the hospital. Thanks sis!

[cerelina]

Hi  I just want to know are there any experiences of sibling rivalry to children with very little age gap say 1 year? Mi eldest is only 7 months now and im 3 months pregnant I'm already thinking about the possibilities kasi sobrang liit ng age gap baka mag selos si ate she's very young pa pag labas ni baby and the attention would be divided agad naawa ako sa kanya when I think about it kaso anjan na yan eh so for those parents how did you deal with thia situation?

ang dami ko natutunan sa thread na ito thanks.

[jjqxiv]

^ Hello sis cerelina. Ganyan din sa eldest and second daughters ko before, one year age gap nila. Hirap ako nun kasi parehas pa silang girls so mas "intense" yung rivalry nila. Yung ginawa ko while pregnant, I spent more time with my eldest para hindi nya ma-feel na wala na kaming attention skanya. Involved din sya nun sa pregnancy ko and lagi nyang i-kiss tummy ko. Nung lumabas na si second daughter, naging selosa na yung eldest ko but I always remind her na love nmin sila equally ni baby. Wala na akong problem nung lumalaki sila kasi sobrang close nila and share na sila sa girly stuff kaso syempre minsan nagkaka-inggitan and away so we make sure na kung anong meron si baby, meron din si ate. Hopefully I helped you. Yang "tips" ko di ko na ma-apply ngayon sa youngest girl ko kasi sobrang spoiled. Enjoy your pregnancy mommy!

[Euphorian Angel Elektra]

Naku mukhang ito din mgiging problem ko. Im having a baby girl this september and 8 years old naman yung sinundan. Minsan kapag nagshashopping kami ng baby naririnig ko si ate saying "ang dami dami naman nyang stuff..." Tapos naging makulit na rin sya ngayon.
Niloloko pa ng mga close neighbor relatives namin na "hala hindi ka na mahal kapag lumabas yan"
Grabe, since alam ko naman nagbibiro, di ko naman mapagalitan kasi elder cousin ng hubby ko.

Then l talked to her, sabi ko nakikipag usap sa mind ko si baby while in my womb,i said she was the one who prayed na magkaron ng baby sis or bro, so wag nya aawayin si baby. She said yes, inuto uto ko na "pano if may nagbully kay baby sa school at inaway sya?"
Sabi nya sya daw magtatanggol k baby sister nya pag lumaki, sabi ko "promise yan ha? Ikaw din magturo sa kanya magbasa at magsulat kasi sabi ni baby sa kin ni baby idol ka daw nya kasi pretty ka at magaling sa school..." Since then she got excited na, kinikiss lagi tummy ko.