There is no such thing as a perfect man, but that doesn’t mean we should just settle for the first guy that buys us a drink, showers us with compliments, or pulls out a chair for us. After all the relationships and pseudo-relationships we’ve had, not to mention the stories we’ve heard from others, we should know better. In fact, we deserve better.

So, yes, finding the right guy can be as frustrating as locating a needle in a haystack, but that shouldn’t stop us from asking for what we want anyway. As an exercise, why don’t you create a list of qualities that you’re looking for in a man? And to show you that you’re not alone in this, here’s a list of ours!

1. Chivalry
We’re not saying you need a guy to do the heavy lifting, but you have to admit that having someone to help you carry your things or see you home safely is pretty nice. It’s hard not to fall for someone who’s a gentleman in every sense of the word.

2. Confidence
Arrogance is one thing, while confidence is quite another. Having a man with the latter by your side is definitely less trouble, and it probably wouldn’t hurt to have some of that confidence rub off on you either.

3. Devotion
Loyalty in a relationship is not always a given, but when a guy shows dedication to his work or devotion to his principles, you at least know that he won’t be the type to—cross your fingers—take his obligations lightly.

4. Modesty
Women may be more known to be more high-maintenance, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t any guys out there who fit the same description. Sometimes, dating someone who’s okay with a night in once in a while is actually a good thing.

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5. Receptiveness
Having someone you can share new experiences with means that your dates tend to be more exciting. Whether it’s trying out a new restaurant, seeing a new movie, or doing something unorthodox in the bedroom, you know that you’ll never be bored.

(Screencap from The Deep Blue Sea courtesy of Music Box Films)

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