Author Topic: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage  (Read 66255 times)

kirsten10

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #340 on: February 23, 2017, 06:17:27 pm »
para sa mga naka move on na pala ito. gusto ko sana magkwento pero parang wrong thread kase nasa marriage pa din ako e. failing marriage - yes. pero nag e-effort naman un husband ko maayos kame. tignan ko kung tatagal sya kakaayos. cheater din kase sya, madaming ulit na. meron pang long time affair na officemate. nung nalaman ko yang long term na yan, di ko na talaga gusto balikan, move on stage na din ako dapat. sa daming ulit natanggap ko na na maghihiwalay din sa huli. deadma na, keber na kung hiwalay wala na din ako pake sana. pro sinumbong ko sila sa HR nila. aba biglang nagresign un husband ko. tapos punta ng punta sa bahay, pinalayas ko na din kase nuon. laging nag aalaga ng mga bata. effort na effort. alam mo na frailties of a woman, nakalimot minsan ayun nakabalik sa bahay. minsan ok kame. minsan away pa din. pero malaking tulong un nag resign na sya, ilang taon ko kase yan nararamdaman nuon na may relasyon pa din sila since first ko nadiscover 7 years ago! di ba. ako na ang t****. at di agad nag action sa women's instinct. pinapa sa karma ko na lang un babaeng un. alam naman ng asawa nya lahat. pinadala ko pa dun sa asawa nun babaeng un ang love letter nya sa asawa ko. I'm sure pag sisisihan din nya ang pagsira ng trust ng husband nya. karma karma.

shinies

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #341 on: February 24, 2017, 03:24:04 am »
Sis, yung pag sumbong sa HR, grounds for termination ba nila yun? Both parties?

Yung ginagawa ni mister na effort ngayon, ginawa ba niya dati?

kim28

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #342 on: February 24, 2017, 11:33:08 am »
Di pa naman totally move on nag start na kami ng sarili naming buhay ng baby ko pero ang sustento un ang aasikasihin namin ngayon katapusan kasi never sya nagbigay.  Thru email kami madalas mag usap para black and white talagang sinabi ko na kapag hindi sya nagbigay ng allowance namin mag ina pupunta ako sa office nila at kakausapin ang HR dun kami mag usap para makuha ko part ng sahod nya btw, start lang sya last week ng Jan.

Malabo naman na kasi magkabalikan kami baliw na baliw un sa GRO nyang kabit ahahah

Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill his promises to her!

kirsten10

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #343 on: February 24, 2017, 05:44:27 pm »
Sis, yung pag sumbong sa HR, grounds for termination ba nila yun? Both parties?

Yung ginagawa ni mister na effort ngayon, ginawa ba niya dati?

yes, grounds for termination if proven true. they were under investigation, and pinasundan pa ng HR. pero wala sila nakita siguro because aware naman un 2 na nagsumbong ako sa HR. then nagresign na agad un husband ko. so parang nawala na din un case. pero alam mo un, it's good to know na kakampihan ka ng HR lalo kung unprofessional conduct talaga ang employees.

dati naman na sya maalaga sa mga bata, pero nun naranasan nya na di nakakasama un mga bata sa gabi, natakot na di na makabalik sa bahay.

ngayon parang stalker ko na un mister ko, lagi nakatawag at text. pati hatid sundo ako, dami na din kase nya time. better this way, mas may peace of mind ako. naging sole breadwinner ako pero at least mas may peace of mind.

shinies

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #344 on: February 24, 2017, 07:08:03 pm »
Ahhh ganun ba.. Dapat pala eh di nila malalaman ang sumbong sa HR hehe.

Di bale sis, sana maging ok na ang lahat..

latte

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #345 on: February 27, 2017, 09:01:04 am »
Hindi madaling makapag move on. Minsan akala ko ok na ko tapos May bigla akong maaalala at makakaramdam na naman ako ng sakit. I wish it will just all go away pero alam ko din na may lesson ang bawat experience natin dito sa mundo, there is always a reason for everything. I just hope I will learn everything that I need to learn as quickly as possible.

kirsten10

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #346 on: February 27, 2017, 04:17:54 pm »
Di pa naman totally move on nag start na kami ng sarili naming buhay ng baby ko pero ang sustento un ang aasikasihin namin ngayon katapusan kasi never sya nagbigay.  Thru email kami madalas mag usap para black and white talagang sinabi ko na kapag hindi sya nagbigay ng allowance namin mag ina pupunta ako sa office nila at kakausapin ang HR dun kami mag usap para makuha ko part ng sahod nya btw, start lang sya last week ng Jan.

Malabo naman na kasi magkabalikan kami baliw na baliw un sa GRO nyang kabit ahahah

ganyan nga daw sis ang pinaka common na issues raised to HR. pag hindi nag bibigay ng support un guy sa family. nakakakuha naman yata talaga ng sustento from salary. sana magwork. balitaan mo kame sis anong nangyari

mysterioza_me

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #347 on: March 27, 2017, 05:40:30 pm »
^Yung ibang company naman ayaw magmeddle sa marital issues lalo na sa usapang sustento.
If a girl understands your b******t, stick through your mistakes, smiles even when you've done nothing for her , it's obvious she's a keeper. But it's also obVious that you don't deserve her...

kim28

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #348 on: March 28, 2017, 03:35:04 pm »
^ Kaya need ng court order para ibigay sa HR if ever ayaw nila magmeddle sa child support issue ng employees. Yung iba naman concern talaga di nag tolerate ng irresponsible na employees :)
Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill his promises to her!

mysterioza_me

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #349 on: April 01, 2017, 11:26:20 pm »
^Sis nakakuha ka na ba? Curious ako talaga if hr will do something sa ganitong employees. Lalo dun sa instances na ang other woman ni hubby officemate din, so i'm wondering kung talagang aaksyon ang hr.
If a girl understands your b******t, stick through your mistakes, smiles even when you've done nothing for her , it's obvious she's a keeper. But it's also obVious that you don't deserve her...

The Lioness

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #350 on: April 05, 2017, 02:28:27 am »
How do you move on from a marriage if you have 2 toddler kids? and if you know na once you both go separate ways, he'll unlikely to support the kids. and if you're not that well-off naman na you can provide everything for the kids. and you only have yourself to depend on.

hotbabe925

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #351 on: April 05, 2017, 12:03:02 pm »
You have to plan it carefully, research ka muna ng mga pwede mong maging alternatice income. Work from home option or direct selling para flexible schedule kung di mo talaga maiwanan ang kids. While youre planning, this will be a critical period because there will be times na iisipin na "Itutuloy ko pa ba'to? Parang nagbabago naman sya eh"

When you start to plan and prepare you have to make sure that it is your decision 100% otherwise mahihirapan ka mag move on

Girltalker2

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #352 on: April 05, 2017, 06:28:04 pm »
^^ been there, done that.

Di ako maka move on dati kasi Takot din ako. Tapos what if magbago sya? Hanggang inabot din ako ng 10 years to decide.

Habang di pa ako maka decide, I made sure i will be ready someday. I saved as much as I could. I also made him pay as much as he allowed. If pumayag, why not di ba. I didn't share any of my pay (kung may increase ako or bonus, he didn't know). So ang Peg ko before, wala bonus or pay cut etc etc. Then I also pursued further studies, explored projects, nag business on the side, started going to gym narin. I made sure I take care of myself, financially and physically, intellectually and mentally. I also made sure kids are also given enough attention, may play dates din kami, weekends we go to grandparents, cousins, kids parties, etc.
Believe me, sobra puno oras ko, di ko na sya naiisip para it helped din make my decision on leaving easier.

Hanggang sa di ko namalayan, 10 years din lumipas, nakahanap ako work abroad. Packed my bags and left with my kids. Sa umpisa, sabi ko kami muna at sunod sya. While iniisip ko sana sumunod sya para magstart ulit kami, I'm also praying hard and let God plan my future. Ayun di nga sumunod. So in the end, I filed for annulment. Doon ako nag give up na totally and I realised ang sarap pala ng pakiramdam walang inaalala Pag Gabi. Sarap matulog. When my friends see me, they saw the difference, iba daw aura ko without him.

Yes there will be times buo na loob mo, pero magbabago ulit. Then let it be... just pray hard. Save as much as you can. I don't want to use the word kupit, but if you can 'save' some of his money for the future of your kids kasi alam mo di naman sya mags-sustento, then Gawin mo. Nothing wrong with that. Para sakin, kulang panga ang isang  Milyon para ibayad niya for the heartache he caused and para sirain ang buhay natin at ng mga bata, so ano ba naman yung pailan-ilang libo to set aside for the kids?

In summary if I look back, leaving him turned out to be the best decision I made in my life - and never turn back.

kirsten10

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #353 on: April 06, 2017, 01:01:00 pm »
^Sis nakakuha ka na ba? Curious ako talaga if hr will do something sa ganitong employees. Lalo dun sa instances na ang other woman ni hubby officemate din, so i'm wondering kung talagang aaksyon ang hr.

ako, wala. kasi nagresign na nga si mister before pa mag flourish ang investigation ng HR.
in fairness to HR, talagang nag investigate, pinasundan pa sila. nagreport sa akin twice. then nun nagresign na, wala na.
sabi lang nila un iba na may case duon na ayaw magsustento nun employee sa family nya, through HR nun company, nagkakaroon ng share un family sa salary. pero baka nga may court order ang mga ganyan.


antithesisofbarbie

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #354 on: April 06, 2017, 01:40:43 pm »
Hello! Hindi naman ako nagmo-move on or need mag move on...pero sobrang affected ako sa mga stories na nababasa ko dito.

Ang masasabi ko lang ay napaka strong talaga ng mga babae in general and nakakalungkot isipin na based on your stories bakit laging mga babae ang pilit na nag aayos ng relasyon?

Mahirap talaga mag move on... pero just pray and always try to be strong :)

And at least may mga companies na tumutulong sa mga asawa. Alam naman natin na minsan sa work nag uumpisa yung mga ganyan na problema. :( Bakit ba kasi di nalang makuntento :(
I measure the moment in the heartbeats I skip.

The Lioness

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #355 on: April 07, 2017, 01:46:11 am »
We can demand financial support from the dads of the kids. Refusal to support is a violation of RA 9262. but syempre kasi, that also gives them a legal claim over the kids. sa case ko, mejo mataas din kasi pride ko. a done deal is a done deal. it's all or nothing. either you have me and the kids, or you dont at all. syempre, paninindigan mo whatever the consquences maybe,

iamfoursixnine

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #356 on: October 24, 2018, 07:50:59 pm »
I backread some of the posts here and narealize ko hindi na pala bago un situation ko sa mga sissies dito. Grabe ang resilience nyo at saludo ko sa inyo na kinaya nyo un decision nyo na makipaghiwalay. I have been contemplating very hard kung kakayanin ko ba makipaghiwalay. Ayaw ng husband ko maghiwalay kami pero ako gusto ko na dahil d nya kayang hiwalayan un kabit nya. I dont want to be a fallback anymore. Takot ako sa thought ng hiwalayan [textspeak!] dahil ayoko mabuhay magisa at walang nang may magmamahal sakin. But im hopeful that un decision kong ito eh d ko ireregret. Alam ko mahirap sa una pero I trust that God is planning something good for me. Na temporary lang ito at matatapos din lahat ng sakit na nararamdaman ko. Sabi nga diba d naman ibibigay satin un pagsubok kung d natin kaya.

i_v_y

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #357 on: October 21, 2019, 06:16:50 pm »
I backread some of the posts here and narealize ko hindi na pala bago un situation ko sa mga sissies dito. Grabe ang resilience nyo at saludo ko sa inyo na kinaya nyo un decision nyo na makipaghiwalay. I have been contemplating very hard kung kakayanin ko ba makipaghiwalay. Ayaw ng husband ko maghiwalay kami pero ako gusto ko na dahil d nya kayang hiwalayan un kabit nya. I dont want to be a fallback anymore. Takot ako sa thought ng hiwalayan [textspeak!] dahil ayoko mabuhay magisa at walang nang may magmamahal sakin. But im hopeful that un decision kong ito eh d ko ireregret. Alam ko mahirap sa una pero I trust that God is planning something good for me. Na temporary lang ito at matatapos din lahat ng sakit na nararamdaman ko. Sabi nga diba d naman ibibigay satin un pagsubok kung d natin kaya.

 I hope and pray that you are in a much better position now sis. Sounds like you already made a decision "I dont want to be a fallback anymore".  That is important. Yung next steps na lang. Kaya mo yan like I did.

Binasa ko ulet from the beginning this thread. Naiyak din ako ulet not because I am hurting pa. Parang nagbabasa na lang ako ng forumnovela at na touch ako. Looking back, parang ang hirap hirap noon but now, I am in a much better place. I live abroad with my partner and our daughter. And I can say, that this is relationship that I have been wanting all my life.

Lady.Doloroso

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #358 on: October 23, 2019, 03:18:44 pm »
I hope and pray that you are in a much better position now sis. Sounds like you already made a decision "I dont want to be a fallback anymore".  That is important. Yung next steps na lang. Kaya mo yan like I did.

Binasa ko ulet from the beginning this thread. Naiyak din ako ulet not because I am hurting pa. Parang nagbabasa na lang ako ng forumnovela at na touch ako. Looking back, parang ang hirap hirap noon but now, I am in a much better place. I live abroad with my partner and our daughter. And I can say, that this is relationship that I have been wanting all my life.

If you don't mind sis ivy, how old are you? Ang ganda nung ending ng story mo. From brokenness to being whole again. Nakakainspire yung story mo na after the heartbreak, you're in a relationship na pinapangarap mo.  Kelangan mo lang talaga maging brave to let go and tama ka, lift everything to God. He know the best for us. Galing, sis!


i_v_y

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Re: Deciding to move on from a failing marriage
« Reply #359 on: October 24, 2019, 05:59:14 am »
If you don't mind sis ivy, how old are you? Ang ganda nung ending ng story mo. From brokenness to being whole again. Nakakainspire yung story mo na after the heartbreak, you're in a relationship na pinapangarap mo.  Kelangan mo lang talaga maging brave to let go and tama ka, lift everything to God. He know the best for us. Galing, sis!



hi sis. I am 38 now and this happened 7 years ago. Manalig lang na, the best is yet come!  Thank you sis!

 


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