Author Topic: Nagalit, nainis, napikon na ba kayo sa relative/s ng asawa nyo?  (Read 119591 times)

three8one

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Re: Nagalit, nainis, napikon na ba kayo sa relative/s ng asawa nyo?
« Reply #540 on: March 04, 2019, 03:42:44 pm »
wala pa naman, so far mababait sila sakin.
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symphonyann

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Re: Nagalit, nainis, napikon na ba kayo sa relative/s ng asawa nyo?
« Reply #541 on: April 25, 2019, 02:24:35 pm »
rare naman, pero ang kinaiinis ko lang eh kapag may bigla silang ginagawa kay baby na hindi muna tinatanong sa akin o sa asawa ko.

px17

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Re: Nagalit, nainis, napikon na ba kayo sa relative/s ng asawa nyo?
« Reply #542 on: April 25, 2019, 04:52:36 pm »
Hindi pa naman asawa, nakakainis lang ng bongga.  My bf informed me that they will be having a family picture/pictorial requested by her tita from US. He showed me a chat message of her tita who's inviting me to join them since I'm practically a family na din daw. When I saw the dates it is our out of trip with friends that we planned 7 months ago. So ako sabi ko agad sakanya "Trip natin yan! sinabi mo agad na sasama ako, eh wala tayo niyan" tapos nagulat siya and said sorry. He knows that may trip kami na mixed-up niya lang [textspeak!] date. Since sakto nasa house nila kami, he told his mom na hindi siya makakasama kasi may trip kami sa Siargao kami. Then his mom asked gaano kami katagal nung sinabi niya na 5 days. Sabi agad ni mom "ay mahaba naman na masyado yun umuwi nalang kayo" so ako nairita. Sa isip ko lang "No hindi ako uuwi for that! hindi naman importante?!"

nung kami nalang ni bf sabi ko sakanya bakit kailangan umuwi? hindi naman kayo kumpleto wala nga mga ibang pinsan mo. Then nagchat na si bf kay tita niya na he will not be there. Si tita naman ang dami ng tanong kung kami lang ba, sino kasama ,Imove nlang [textspeak!] trip, sama nalang kami sa trip nung daughter niya (na uuwi rin). Which really did irks me! Tapos yung chat niya parang kinokonsensya na na niya si bf like may words pa na "Malakas naman ako sainyo diba?" Little background close talaga sila ng tita niya. His tita is nice naman sakin ever since pa. Then his parent's called him saying na hindi papayag tita niya na wala siya sa pictorial kaya si bf naipit na he decided to booked a day earlier para makauwi. I don't know kung selfish ako pero nainis lang talaga ako.
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crzysxycl

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Re: Nagalit, nainis, napikon na ba kayo sa relative/s ng asawa nyo?
« Reply #543 on: April 25, 2019, 07:12:14 pm »
Yes. Ngayon kasi linggo linggo nanaman sila sa amin naglalunch. Buti kung isang tao lang eh kaso buong pamilya. Hindi tinatablan ng hiya mga to.

thebratinella

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Re: Nagalit, nainis, napikon na ba kayo sa relative/s ng asawa nyo?
« Reply #544 on: April 25, 2019, 10:45:41 pm »
^^ similar diyan yung mga ginagawa ng mother-in-law ko dati. kahit may lakad kami ng husband ko lalambingin/guilt trip/convince niya husband ko na umuwi kami sa province nila with her kesyo miss na daw ng mga tito niya husband ko etc. si sister-in-law naman pag walang makuhang driver, si hubby ang kakausapin para pagdrive sila. hindi naisip na may own family na and dapat kayanin na nila on their own. good luck sa iyo, sis kapag married na kayo and he can't say no to his mom or other family members. hubby ko nakakadecline na nowadays kasi nag-aaway kami.
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px17

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Re: Nagalit, nainis, napikon na ba kayo sa relative/s ng asawa nyo?
« Reply #545 on: April 26, 2019, 08:41:59 am »
^yan pinaka nabwisitan ko sis yung guilt trip. Pag nag aaway kayo sis paano? I mean okay pa din naman kayo? kasi last time sinabi ko sakanya "So paano pag kinasal na tayo ganito parin?" feeling ko kasi baka pag may sinabi pa ako ma-offend ko siya syempre family pa rin naman niya yun.
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thebratinella

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Re: Nagalit, nainis, napikon na ba kayo sa relative/s ng asawa nyo?
« Reply #546 on: April 26, 2019, 09:55:58 pm »
before pinag-aawayan namin talaga yung mother and sis niya pag may mga requests. kasi yung mother niya mahilig magyaya umuwi ng province nila. i have nothing against visiting their house which is an hour away from my parents' home kung saan kami nakatira. ang ayaw ko yung tuwing may holiday or weekend na uuwi siya sa province, si husband ang yayayain niya para nga naman may magdrive. hindi makarefuse sa kanya dati pero after 2 years, nagets ng husband ko point ko. nag-aask na siya sa akin if okay ba sumama sa kung anong lakad ng mother niya. before kasi icancel or postpone namin plan namin or adjust ng time para pagbigyan. nowadays, nakakapagdecline na si hubby kasi madalas pagod sa work or may gusto siyang gawin or puntahan. dati tuwing mag-aaway kami sinasabi ko: kami na ng anak mo ang pamilya mo ngayon. hindi na yung nanay and sister mo yung priority mo.

buhay pa father-in-law ko pero hindi kami in good terms. hindi din siya kasundo ng husband ko. since nameet ko husband ko hindi na siya sa family home nila nakatira.

weigh mo, sis. mag-observe ka and kausapin yung bf mo. mabuti pang as early as now alam mo na magiging situation if ever kayo magkatuluyan.
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Paularbear

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Re: Nagalit, nainis, napikon na ba kayo sa relative/s ng asawa nyo?
« Reply #547 on: May 03, 2019, 02:11:58 pm »
Ayaw sakin ng family ni husband lalo na yung parents nya. Dito kami nakatira sa bahay ng parents nya since naka based naman sila abroad. Umuuwi sila twice a year lang. Sobrang hirap makisama mga sis kahit na minsan lang sila umuwi. Yung ibang relatives ni hubs parang ayaw din sakin pero hindi naman lahat. Just a little background, I came from a broken family. Very family oriented sila husband. My parents are also based in abroad. Pati yung mga napangasawa ng mga kapatid ni husband came from a good and happy family. Minsan di maiwasan na mainggit. Ang ayos ng pakikitungo nila sa mga asawa ng mga kapatid ni husband, sakin lang hindi. Palagi akong left out, hindi belong feeling. :(

o9kristin

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Re: Nagalit, nainis, napikon na ba kayo sa relative/s ng asawa nyo?
« Reply #548 on: May 03, 2019, 07:03:28 pm »
Hmm. Why does your family background matter? Were you able to ask your husband bakit ganun pakikitungo sayo ng in-laws mo sis?
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Paularbear

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Re: Nagalit, nainis, napikon na ba kayo sa relative/s ng asawa nyo?
« Reply #549 on: May 03, 2019, 09:20:13 pm »
^ Big deal sa kanila pag broken family. Hindi daw kasi maganda upbringing usually pag broken fam. Actually sis hindi na namin pinag uusapan yung mga parinig tsaka pang babara sakin ng mom nya. Palaging ?pagpasensyahan nalang?. Ilang beses na din kami nag away dahil dito. Nag away na din sila ng mom nya before. Hindi naman na ganun kalala yung pagiging monster mom-in-law nya pero minsan pinaparamdam pa din nya sakin na hindi ako belong. For example may lakad sila pag wala si hubby hindi ako sinasama pag andito lang si hubs tsaka nila ko sinasama. Pero [textspeak!] mga asawa ng kapatid kasama din nila. Madalas pa hindi nila sinasabi sakin na aalis pala sila. After namin mag nap ng kids, pag labas namin ng room wala ng tao, nakaalis na lahat. Mga ganung scenario. Tapos pag uwi nila super kwento pa na nag pa spa sila nag dinner etc. Hindi naman sa naiinggit ako sa kung anong ginawa nila, pero parang ang sakit lang kasi feeling ko hindi ako part ng family.

khaleesiCersei

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Re: Nagalit, nainis, napikon na ba kayo sa relative/s ng asawa nyo?
« Reply #550 on: May 07, 2019, 12:40:55 am »
^for your own peace of mind sis at sa ikatatahimik ng buhay nyong mag asawa, sana makabukod na kayo asap. Di bale nang mag rent kesa ma drain ng negative vibes. Maabsorb pa ng mga anak nyo yan. Malas ang may mga kasamang nega sa bahay. Kung ayaw sayo ng family, dont feel bad. Not your problem. Just be civil lang. You dont have to please them or make them like you. Cut ties if you have to. Mas magiging magaan ang buhay kesa magpa apekto sa kanila.

exquisitegem

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Re: Nagalit, nainis, napikon na ba kayo sa relative/s ng asawa nyo?
« Reply #551 on: May 07, 2019, 05:56:57 pm »
^I agree. Leave and cleave sis.

tomatostellar

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Re: Nagalit, nainis, napikon na ba kayo sa relative/s ng asawa nyo?
« Reply #552 on: May 11, 2019, 12:38:45 pm »
Newly married, but we already had our first "situation".
And though, I already told him how I felt about this, nalulungkot parin ako everytime I remember it.
Eto yung kwento. Hubby is only son and has 2 sisters, one is about 11 years younger than him, but is now adult na rin, 20 y.o. ++ Long read ++
SIL and MIL live in Baliuag, Bulacan; just the 2 of them coz F-I-L is in the US.
Hubby and I live in Bacoor. Recently, SIL went to a concert in Araneta. Wala sya kasama (but I think met with other fans sa venue).
So as we know concerts usually end at around 10ish or 11pm. MIL was "kinakabahan" for SIL since she will be going home late from Cubao. MIL contacted hubby (I think morning of the concert) para sunduin si SIL, then hatid to Bulacan.
Wala kami car to do this but he agreed. Hindi ko sya sinabihan na he can't go, Eh paano kung meron nanyari kay SIL?  Still, this whole thing does not feel right for me.
Ano ba inaarte ko, di naman ako na abandon or whatever; though di ako makakasama kasi may pasok pa ko.
But I always have this feeling that his identity is more "maaasahang anak, best brother" vs. "man of our house/my betterhalf".
Yung ganon pa lang na, expected ni MIL na okay lang for him to go to Cubao, then uuwi sila sa Bulacan ng ganon lang, short notice, and as if ang lapit ng Cavite and Bulacan.

When I told him about this, wala sya sinabi but hugged me. Yun yung isa pang nagpalungkot sakin, for me that was "Sorry, I made you feel that way, pero it is what it is." -- Ewan baka interpretation ko lang yun.
 
I love that he is a loving son/brother. Pero ewan, nalulungkot pa rin ako.
I try to be mature, na isipin ko, we are now "one". And so maybe it means, mas maging tulad nya ako - be always there for family. But I still can't help how I feel.
« Last Edit: May 15, 2019, 10:18:51 am by tomatostellar »
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exquisitegem

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Re: Nagalit, nainis, napikon na ba kayo sa relative/s ng asawa nyo?
« Reply #553 on: May 14, 2019, 05:43:36 pm »
^Hugs sis. Your feelings are valid.
But then, try to look at it at a different perspective na lang. What if baliktad kayo, you have a younger sibling, and hindi niya gamay ang Manila, tapos uwian lang siya sa province at gagabihin sa pag uwi. For her safety, okay lang naman na magsakripisyo si hubby total family naman yun. And sayo din, extended family na sila. Siguro next time, sabihan na lang sila na kapag may ganun, sabihin beforehand. Hindi short notice.
Minsan ganon talaga, it takes a while and a lot of patience in dealing with the inlaws.
Ang mantra ko kasi, always shower them with kindness - no matter what.
« Last Edit: May 14, 2019, 11:13:37 pm by exquisitegem »

simang

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Re: Nagalit, nainis, napikon na ba kayo sa relative/s ng asawa nyo?
« Reply #554 on: May 15, 2019, 10:01:51 am »
^have to agree with you sis, always be the bigger person especially when it comes to in laws. If it happened to me, I'll let it slide. Ganun talaga, even if you're married, you have other roles to fulfill, and it's not like he compromised your marriage for the other. It also seems like this is a one time thing, so I don't think it should be a big deal. I'm sure your husband or your in law doesn't intend to bypass or offend you in any way.
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tomatostellar

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Re: Nagalit, nainis, napikon na ba kayo sa relative/s ng asawa nyo?
« Reply #555 on: May 15, 2019, 10:20:10 am »
thank you mga sis <3
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px17

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Re: Nagalit, nainis, napikon na ba kayo sa relative/s ng asawa nyo?
« Reply #556 on: May 15, 2019, 11:44:43 am »
@tomatostellar I think what you felt is normal. Anyways read this months ago so I'm sharing, https://www.relationshipmatters.ph/blog/leave-and-cleave/, might help you out. May comprise naman palagi so agree ako sa other sissies here wag lang siguro palapalagi.
Learn to Love yourself First! :)

sassy_gal18

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Re: Nagalit, nainis, napikon na ba kayo sa relative/s ng asawa nyo?
« Reply #557 on: May 15, 2019, 05:39:18 pm »
Napikon at nainis yes.

Whenever vivisit kame sa house nila fiance my future mil will treat me coldly  lalo na pag andyan yung gf nung younger brother. Talagang papakita nila they like her better than me kahit na wala sya effort. Panganay si fiance.

Future MIL and SIL lagi ko sila nahuhuli tinitititigan ako tas pag nahuli ko sila sabay mag aalis ng tingin. To me this is nakakasuspetsa kasi ano na meron? Im always trying to be nice sa kanilang lahat.

Also this always happen na pag uuwi na ko mag aabot ako ng money kay MIL (lumuluwas kame sa kanila pag may okasyon so instead of buying gifts na hindi naman magugustuhan im just giving money) biglang chummy chummy saken si mader nya na kulang na lang halikan ako sa galak. I feel used.

 


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