Got questions regarding men? Post it here! (Thread 4)

[jellibean]

what are the chances (if there's any) that a guy would break up with his girlfriend to be with another girl?

[young_maiden]

@chinito

thanks. ganyan nga ginagawa ko sa isang guy na close ko. yun nga lang feeling ko iisipin niya napaka-inconsistent ko. hehe. pero mas ok na lang siguro yun kaysa isipin niya easy ako.

[Chinito]

what are the chances (if there's any) that a guy would break up with his girlfriend to be with another girl?

a lot of chances and possibilities..   it is possible for him to fell out of love with you and have an instantly fatal attraction with someone with super landi power.. or he could simple get fed up with your style.

[jtansanco]

what are the chances (if there's any) that a guy would break up with his girlfriend to be with another girl?

Ummmm.... A friend of mine did that 2 months ago.

[jtansanco]

Question: Paano ba ipaparamdam sa guy na gusto ko siya ng hindi ako nagmumukhang easy-to-get? Possible ba yun?

The question is, type ka ba niya? If he likes you, no problem na yan. You can do whatever you want with him because he will keep on chasing you regardless of what you do. If he doesn't like you, please don't try.

[oshiawase]

^pamo kung si guy ay torpe type, pano ba usually nageexpress ng "like" ang ganitong type?

[simang]

^girltalker here, but based on my experience no guy is torpe if he really liked you. He will let you know clearly in one way or another. If his being torpe is bigger than letting his feelings for you show, then he doesn't like you enough to actually make a move. One day, you will realize that if a guy really really likes you, you won't be confused. And he will swallow his katorpehan to let you know that

[oshiawase]

^ you have a freaking good point! so what if a birl likes a torpe guy, and the guy is being so torpe about it, what should the girl do? should she stop pursuing the guy altogether??

[young_maiden]

The question is, type ka ba niya? If he likes you, no problem na yan. You can do whatever you want with him because he will keep on chasing you regardless of what you do. If he doesn't like you, please don't try.

malabo siya eh. minsan may mga signs na type niya ako. minsan wala. i do notice some changes in his behavior. kuripot siya at mahilig magpalibre sa mga girls. yung mga girls na close niya na matataba aasarin niya na lechon, baboy o dugong. pero never niya ginawa sa akin yun. never nagkuripot at nagpalibre sa akin. kahit medyo mataba din ako, never niya ako inasar sa weight ko. sabi nga ng isang common friend namin mukhang may special treatment daw ako pagdating sa kanya.

pero mahirap pa din mag assume na type niya ako. hindi nga nagtetext o tumatawag pag di kami magkasama.

salamat sa advice. i guess di pa panahon para iparamdam sa kanya na type ko siya hanggat siya mismo malabo pa kumilos.

[oshiawase]

^omg same situation tyo!

[slickchick]

a lot of chances and possibilities..   it is possible for him to fell out of love with you and have an instantly fatal attraction with someone with super landi power.. or he could simple get fed up with your style.

follow up question on this bro. in your opinion (as a guy), how should we ladies, keep the "sparks going/burning" to prevent our guys from being fatally attracted to women with super landi powers? TIA! 

[simang]

^pwede ako sumagot? Haha ako i think the best way to keep the spark is to just enjoy the moment -- avoid drama don't be praning and make him feel appreciated all the time

Another thing is to NOT change a thing about yourself. Remember, he was attracted to you for a reason. If he liked you for being carefree, be that. If he liked you for being prim, be prim. If he liked you for being smart, then be smart.

Lastly, have a life outside of the relationship. Go out with your friends, do your job well, do things that are your own.

And, be the woman minus the hormones. What I mean is, be sexy, be nurturing, be flirtatious,  be emotional, but don't be dramatic.

[slickchick]

^ haha! thanks sis sa tips. took note of them.     follow up question lang sis. sorry to ask, when you say "avoid the drama", what does "drama" (in the context of relationships) exactly mean? eto ba yung tipong bawal umiyak kahit gigil na gigil ka na sa inis or lungkot? or is it yung being too malambing or sweet, bordering na on clingy? and how do you differentiate na being emotional and being dramatic? sorry dami tanong.. hehe! TIA! 

[young_maiden]

^omg same situation tyo!

pansin ko nga sis. hehe. hay. good luck sa ating buhay pag-ibig. sana di tayo maging luhaan sa huli.

ginagawa ko advice sa akin ni chinito. cat and string theory. try mo din.

yun nga lang ayaw ko din ibigay lahat ng effort ko. di rin naman kasi ako sure kung type nga ako nung guy.

[simang]

^ haha! thanks sis sa tips. took note of them.     follow up question lang sis. sorry to ask, when you say "avoid the drama", what does "drama" (in the context of relationships) exactly mean? eto ba yung tipong bawal umiyak kahit gigil na gigil ka na sa inis or lungkot? or is it yung being too malambing or sweet, bordering na on clingy? and how do you differentiate na being emotional and being dramatic? sorry dami tanong.. hehe! TIA! 

how do i avoid drama.. haha i have no exact answer but i have one thing -- i choose to be happy everyday. not just within the relationship but with everything in my life in general. i think positive and happy thoughts so i feel good everytime. so a simple "he didn't text me good morning" will never ever make me feel bad.

also, what i mean by being emotional but not dramatic is that you're allowed to feel things -- happy things, sad things, crazy things, you can feel them all. but i never make a big deal out of them. simply put, i don't sweat the small stuff. you can be sad, you're entitled to feel however you feel, but if you think about being sad too much, you will be much sadder.

on being clingy -- ahhh, i hate clingy. guy hates clingy. one can be sweet and expressive and not be clingy. that's why i keep a life of my own outside the relationship. i want him to be with me, but i don't need him to be with me all the time, because hey, i have other things going on in my life. but, he being with me is very much appreciated.

so far, that's what has worked for me. true enough, after more than a year of dating, i still feel like nililigawan ako everytime, heck, mas nagiging sweet pa nga sya habang tumatagal.

[Chinito]

follow up question on this bro. in your opinion (as a guy), how should we ladies, keep the "sparks going/burning" to prevent our guys from being fatally attracted to women with super landi powers? TIA! 

actually simang got it figured..
it's true na madalas sa isang relationship may strong at meron din weak. the weak one always have to give in, always the one to understand, patient and delivers most of the effort.. and lastly she/he is the first one to worry about losing the relationship.. and sana hindi ikaw to.
Btw, regarding sa  question mo about how to keep the spark? it is subjective. depende din yan sa gravity ng love niyo sa isa't isa at sa pinagsamahan. typically some of the couples i met. they just simply do things exciting. they play, they tease, they travel a lot, they spent time together telling stories, they share dreams and plans, they fight, they laugh, they do anything most children do. in other words, it's random and spontaneous. you cannot feel the sparks if it is unnatural or unauthentic.. one must ignite it and the other should be reactive.. and sa larangan ng pag ibig it should be a never ending exploration and learning. if you do the same thing you usually do everything will stay the same. routinary is equals to boredom and boredom is equals to unsatisfactory then if not satisfied, it'll lead you to explore and look for something exciting and then you'll linger and might develop a new world.

There were times din na adjusted na masyado yung isang party kaya medyo na lihis na sya sa orig niyang personality kaya medyo nag coconflict na sa partner. if this happen, try to look back. assess yourself from then a now and see what are the qualities he like/loves about you. then maybe bringing the older you will simply bring the spark back. minsan kasi sa sobrang love natin, nababago na tayo ng partner naten in almost all aspect. try not to be weak.

[slickchick]

sis simang and bro Chinito thanks soooo much for sharing your thoughts. i really appreciate it.  i almost did a copy-paste of your replies and have them printed to remember them always.  i'm about to "answer" this guy, and it will surely help to keep those pointers in mind. thanks again! 

[Girltalker2]

^ thank you sa advice! Actually, I didn't notice that he was being nice to me in a "special" way until a common colleague of ours told me that we had sort of "spark" whenever we talk to each other. From then, I started to notice things. I'm afraid i am merely being mislead, and i am overreading things. how do I stop? i kinda know now that he's not into me. Hello, he doesn't even send a single text message when we do not meet for days. Do I still continue "flirting" with him? Or just treat him as an "ordinary friend"?

Girl ako, pero will just comment anong gagawin ko if I am in that situation.

Just stop. Look for some other diversion and some other crush.

Flirting? No
Treat him as an ordinary friend? Yes

Question: Paano ba ipaparamdam sa guy na gusto ko siya ng hindi ako nagmumukhang easy-to-get? Possible ba yun?

Bakit mo gusto ipaalam sa guy na gusto mo sya?

follow up question on this bro. in your opinion (as a guy), how should we ladies, keep the "sparks going/burning" to prevent our guys from being fatally attracted to women with super landi powers? TIA! 

Ever since naniniwala ako, kahit anong acrobatics ang gawin mo, kung natapat na player ang BF mo or hindi ka sinisiryoso, nothing is gonna keep him away from other girls. 

Nasa sa lalaki iyan, kahit paligiran pa sya ng mga super landi na mga babae.  If he cares and values  your relationship, hindi sya papatol sa ibang babae - malandi man o hindi.

As for the GF, I guess just focus on building and nurturing your relationship.  Tsaka in the first place, bago mo sya naging BF, dapat talaga may chemistry/compatibility kayo, may common interests, good communication, romance, etc etc. To my mind, iyan lang ang ilan sa mga things that can keep the spark there in the relationship.

[young_maiden]

^ sis, naisip ko lang kasi nakakasawa na yung lagi ako nagtatago ng feelings. tuwing may crush ako sa isang guy, laging patago. naiingit ako sa mga girls na kayang kaya umamin sa mga crushes nila. pero kasi takot din ako mareject.

[Girltalker2]

^ Bata ka pa siguro 

Ya, that's how it goes usually. May 1 crush ka na lagi mong inaabangan kung dumaan, kausapin ka etc. I remember my HS days. 

But seriously, when I started dating, I learned recently kasi na better NOT to let the guy know na patay na patay ka sa kanya.  If he is interested, it is enough to reciprocate na interested ka rin to get to know him. That's all. At least IMHO.

Mga lalaki kasi once alam nila may gusto ka sa kanila, especially kung hindi mo naman sya kaano ano, tendency is they can take advantage eh. Ayaw mo naman siguro ito mangyari. So for me, better not let the guy know.  Tapos minsan nangyari sakin na I liked a guy, but yung guy eh minsan nawawala wala.  We went out for a few dates.  Kaso pag ni ha ni ho wala, dyosko nakakainis pero wala naman akong magawa, di naman ako puede magalit at naka-date ko lang naman sya, di naman ako GF. Ang ginawa ko, I looked for other dates, other crushes.  Nothing serious. Para lang malibang ako. And true indeed, nawala ang attention ko sa guy nayun.  Hanggang umabot sa point sya na ang text ng text, calling me once in a while to ask me out or minsan email pa since di ko nanga sinasagot ang text nya or calls.  Hanggang sa nagka BF nako, at naiirita narin si BF nung nalaman nyang tumatawag itong guy na ito. Buti nga sa kanya. Yabang nya dati eh!