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Is this scenario familiar to you? You and your officemates decide to have lunch out one Friday, and it just so happens that the company released the payroll later than usual, so you had to lend an office buddy some money so she can join you. She promises to pay once she gets cash later that afternoon. After a week, however, your friend still hasn't paid what she owes you, and you feel awkward reminding her about it.

Especially among Filipinos, it's quite normal to be hesitant when it comes to collecting money—be it a small or large sum—even from your best friend. It gets more frustrating when you see that she already managed to buy something expensive and seemed to have forgotten what she owes you. In this case, how do you ask her to pay without offending her?

Real Simple recommends expressing concern so you don't give off the impression that you're annoyed at her for forgetting her debt. Say something like "I'm bothered. I don't want this to come between us, but I remember you owing me something still and I see you've just bought an expensive purse. Is there anything going on? I hope we could talk about it," suggests Dave Ramsey, author of The Total Money Makeover: A Proven Plan for Financial Fitness. It's direct to the point and more tactful than "Hey, remember that lunch you owe me?"

eHow recommends being patient with your friend and giving her the benefit of the doubt. She may intend to pay you off, but perhaps she needs a little more time.

If nothing works, take it as a lesson never to lend money a friend can't afford to repay. Should you feel compelled to help, make sure you can consider the money you lend as a favor that might not be returned. "You're better off making it a gift and not expecting it back. That’s much less awkward," says Ramsey.

A bigger loan, of course, is a different matter altogether. In that case, you may need to act like a banker and clear your expectations, interest rates, and financial details with your friend from the very beginning. "When you act serious about collecting money from your friend, he will be more willing to repay you in a timely manner," says eHow.

 

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