<< On Men and Women, Love and Sex
Is He Messing With Your Head? >>

Cosmo's Mesmerize-Your-Man Plan

Feb 19, 2007

“When I first started dating Sean, all it took was a sexy smirk and a semi-funny comment to make his eyes glaze over with admiration,” remembers 27-year-old Stephanie, an aerobics instructor. “Now that we’ve been seeing each other for several months, I’m realizing that I’ll need to employ more than those simple maneuvers to keep him captivated.”

Though it may not take much more than charisma and a creative opening line to land a man when you first lock eyes, extending his adoration requires extra effort. You see, just like we yearn for a boyfriend who’ll get more interesting, exciting, and lovable with time, guys long for that dream girl they’ll never stop drooling over. So how can you ensure that he stays hopelessly devoted for the duration? Listen up as these relationship experts and perpetually pursued women tell how to keep a guy spellbound at every stage of the dating game.

Six Minutes
When it comes to sizing up a possible love connection, most guys have an attention deficit, meaning they assess whether the chemistry they have with you is awesome or flawsome in a matter of minutes. “Men decide very quickly if you’re going to be a potential mate or passed over,” says David Copeland, coauthor of How to Succeed With Men (Prentice Hall, 2000), who adds that to a degree, you have control over the outcome of that decision. “There are two types of attraction,” explains Copeland. “The love at first sight variety and the kind you generate by doing things that turn a guy on and pique his interest.”

In the latter case, hooking the object of your desire may mean going over the top. Why? Subtle flirting signs, such as flipping your hair or smiling sweetly, are lost on guys. “In order to feel invited to talk to you, most men need a crystal clear signal that you’re interested,” says Copeland. “Smile two times bigger than you think you should and force yourself to hold your eye contact for a fraction longer than you feel is necessary.”

Of course, the most obvious way to alert a guy that you’re jonesing to meet him is to make the first move yourself. That’s what Katrina, a ballsy 23-year-old graphic designer, did when she spotted her now-boyfriend Jon at a party. “He was the hottest guy I’d seen in God knows how long, so I walked right up to him and asked him if he’d seen the host. I knew she was in the bathroom but I begged him to help me ‘find’ her anyway. When he succeeded, I made him feel like he was my hero. That got the ball rolling.”

Once you have his attention, the next hurdle is getting him to hang around. “Guys react positively to tactile stimulation, so don’t be afraid to be a little hands-on,” says Bart Ellis, author of The Date Doctor’s Guide to Dating: How to Get From First Date to Perfect Mate (Warner Books, 1998). “Gently touching his arm or shoulder at various points in the conversation conveys that you’re a fun and affectionate person without making him feel pawed.” Other captivating qualities: originality and predictability. “On my first date with Eric, I flagged down the cocktail waitress and ordered a single-malt scotch on the rocks,” says Becky, 24. “I guess he expected me to order a glass of wine or a fruity cocktail because he looked stunned.” Her unique request is definitely what sealed the second-date deal, confirms Eric. “I wanted to find out what other surprises she had in store for me.”

Tags:


5 Comments

Add Comment
  • thaks for the tips but i sometimes think that this world is just too much of a one way stream.girls always get guys to notice them, why not the other way around. and besides, a woman should always be accepted for who she is.if ya cant deal with that then you better be gone balla!

    November 23, 2006 at 4:26 pm


  • It's nice to read about it but I think about fair share and has to be no gender prejudice.

    February 19, 2007 at 4:50 am


  • Whoa!!! I'll try those thingys once I get to go out... Hmmm.. or on everyday encounters!!!

    February 19, 2007 at 10:10 am


  • i tried that, and it did work with my Boss, the only problem is i find it hard to prolong the connection bec of work relation...

    March 30, 2007 at 4:17 pm


  • I am still an "oldschool" kinda girl. I believe in love and everything else that comes with it. If a person truly and deeply is mesmerized by you, he will respond to your moves sweetly, lovingly and may I add - very sexually!

    April 30, 2007 at 8:24 pm


Most Read of the week

Random Articles

More Articles

  • On Men and Women, Love and Sex

    Men are jerks. At least, that’s what all the women say. Yes, we love them and yes, we want them. But it doesn’t change the facts. Oh sure,...

  • Sex Without Strings?

    One night stands. Flings. Who ever said that men have the monopoly on casual sex? In this day and age, women have come a long way since the Sexual Rev...

  • Are You the Right Kind of Girlfriend?

    “When did I turn into such a bitch?” asks Beth, a 29-year-old broker. Recently, she threw a fit when her boyfriend, Jack, told her that he...

Recent Comments

Recently Active MyFN Members

Go to MyFN

Recently Active MyFN Groups

Go to FN Groups

From the FN Archives

EXPLORE ARCHIVE
   Show All
down