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Is virginity a pre-requisite for marriage? Some will say, “My BF and I agreed to wait until we say, ‘I do.’” Others gave it up when they were 14. I lost mine when I was 15.

Centuries ago, virginity was described as a state of independence, immunity to temptations, and a gift from a Christian God. Virginity can be perceived in many ways. If the inch flap of hymenal skin is intact, then you are a virgin. If you are chaste, you are a virgin. If you have rebellious coarse hair and anti-social, definitely you will remain a virgin for life.

When you marry pristine and with an unbroken hymen, it will be a very precious gift to your husband. These females are commendable since it’s very difficult to control sexual urges especially if the relationship is passionate. As they say, the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak.

However, there can be a downside. If you marry inexperienced, you will not know what to expect, you will not have a basis to compare with. Why should I give up my virginity before I marry my boyfriend? Because you have to ensure sexual compatibility. To get married blindly is like starting an end. If you are not sexually compatible, making love will not be enjoyable and pleasurable. Furthermore, if you have not gone to the sack, you can never know if he has physiological disabilities, or if he is sexually unfit. Knowing that only after the vows will cause regret and resentment.

Marriage is a union between two people. It is forever. It is not something that expires monthly unless renewed. Once you are in - you are in. It involves love, commitment, and a myriad of sexual encounters. Yes, a lot of sexual episodes - ten to fifteen times a day, or seven times a week. Marriage is harmony. Harmony of two people’s hearts, bodies, and souls. Thus sexual harmony should be achieved. Married couples are destined to pro-create. And this endeavor will be effortless if you are sexually attuned.

Sex in marriage is not only lust, but also something that cleanses the body and soul. It casts away negativities and makes the psyche capable. One can heal one’s partner through sexual contact. If sexually compatible, it can lead to a higher harmony and spiritual advancement.

‘Many couples drift apart because of unresolved deep-rooted issues, which can be traced from sexual non-fulfillment’

Marriage is a melting pot of responsibilities. Sex is one of them. Now, can you prepare yourself? Yes you can! By being sensitive and knowledgeable. Once ready and equipped, sex in marriage will be undemanding.

It is better to take swimming instructions before you plunge, than get backstroke directions when you are already drowning.

Others may say two virgin humans can marry and as they go along, they will together discover bliss and eventually mature sexually. Yes I believe so. However, it is also true that many couples drift apart because of unresolved deep-rooted issues, which can be traced from sexual non-fulfillment.

Don’t get me wrong. I am not saying that women should ABSOLUTELY lose their virginity before marriage. The norm holds true, a virgin still is viewed as praiseworthy and righteous.

I have a question, though. Who is more upright and worthy to wed? Rebecca, a 23-year-old team leader with an intact hymen, but did necking and heavy petting with the entire football team? Or Jane, a 24-year-old single mom who lost her virginity to her one and only first love? Does it really matter?