There are times in your life when you know you can’t go any lower. Whether it’s with an ending relationship, an unwanted career, or a devastating event, you may feel that you’re at a dead end, when in fact you’re at a crossroads–it’s either now or never, sink or swim.
As they say, there’s no other way to go but up, but the mountain is high and the climb is daunting. The key is the strength of your will. As long as you want to start over, you’re halfway there.
1. Grieve if you have to.
Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance—these are the five stages you go through when mourning a loss whether or not by choice. It’s a long and painful process, and there will be times when you think you’ve already taken three steps forward only to take four back. Don’t rush. Each stage takes time.
To effectively start over, you need to accept things as they are, and from there, propel yourself forward and upward. Take it one day at a time.
2. Make a decision.
No one can force you to start over but yourself. Beginning a new chapter in your life is a choice, and one that you need to make every single day. Stop making excuses like “I need to see him a few more times for closure”, or “I’ll just think about getting out of this sucky job next year.” Just do it and stick by it.
3. Open yourself to change.
You may fear making a choice and taking the plunge because there may be nothing or no one to catch you. However, you’ll need to embrace risks in order to see what the Universe has to offer you. There will be a lot of mistakes, and you’ll find yourself in places outside your comfort zone, but you can’t return to who you were or what your life was before. You’re moving on. You’re starting over. Accept the transition.
4. Have a clear goal.
Set your sights to what you’ve always wanted to do and where you’ve always wanted to be. It can be getting over a bad relationship, shifting to a career that you actually love, or even finding what you exactly want to do with your life. Whatever it is, it’s valid. Take everything you have and move towards it.
5. Choose who you’ll listen to.
There will be times when you’ll get a lot of great advice and a lot of useless negativity from important people in your life. You’ll need to sift through them to find which can help you with achieving your goal. This doesn’t mean that they’re trying to dishearten you (although some do). It only means that their personal truths are not your truths. Choose who you’ll listen to, but most of all, listen to your mind and your heart.
6. Be happy.
Whatever your goal is, your underlying reason for all your efforts is happiness. You want to start over because you want to be happy and free. So allow yourself this gift. After all, you deserve it.
PHOTO: Stocksnap; GIF: Giphy