Your Ex Amorous with another. How to cope?

[Foodict]

How can you cope with seeing your ex partner being sweet / being passionate / just plain lusting for another?

Can't help thinking about it all the time. Hard Liquor any use?

[zee87]

hala. di ba ex na nga, e hayaan mo na siya.
Wala ka naman magagawa dun kasi nga wala ka naman na dapat pakialam sa kanya.
Ikaw naman, wag mo na siya laging tingnan.
hanap na ng iba pagkakaabalahan.
Kasi pag lagi siya ang titingnan mo , masasaktan ka lang.
Baka nga yun talaga ang plano niya, saktan ka.
o e di parang pinakita mo pa sa kanya na affected ka, panalo siya.

[tawnylee]

Sorry to hear that bro. How long have you been broken up?

[Foodict]

^tawnylee

about 5 months, she went steady with a guy a month after we broke up (which was just before valentines, now I hate that holiday ).

 We are in the same town and we see each other regularly. So its awkward, hurtful and maddening when I see the guy hugging her. Its not the guy's brazenness that bothers me, its the tenderness of her reaction to him. 

Never felt inclined to do something violent until now... lol.

[tawnylee]

That sucks. Maybe it would help if you moved out muna, try living someplace else, at least for a while? Proximity is always bad news; especially when the other person has started dating someone else.

Concentrate on work, try to find/develop a new hobby, do things that you really wanted to do but never had time for because you had to spend time with her before. This is the time to enjoy yourself and aim to be a better person My friend also made a list why it was better that he and his ex are not together anymore, and whenever he would miss her, he would look at it and realize that it's better that they're not together.

Maybe deactivating facebook would be a good idea too? Bottom line is, the less you see her, the better

Oh, and start dating other people when you're ready

[Foodict]

^tawnylee

Moving out isnt possible for work related reasons. She won't move either since her business is located here.

"Nadedemonyo" would probably be the best term I feel when I see them together.

That list of offenses is ok though and I will try that although I'm not really the type to track faults.

[junetwentythree]

Distract yourself. Don't even look their way. Use all your might not to pay them any attention. Pray. This part of dealing with the breakup sucks a** but you will get past it. Get beyond the anger.

[aquacharly]

Do something or others, specially for those who can't ever pay you back.  Charity/community work.
Work is always the best antidote.

[Foodict]

^ junetwentythree

Thanks, I think I already know the answer but I just need some reinforcement from other sources. Praying has been critical during the whole recovery period.

I'll close my eyes then. Then hold my hands in prayer. Freak em out when they see me. LOL

[tawnylee]

It doesn't have to be faults per se. It can be things like, you're now more financially independent now that she's out of the picture. You don't have to spend stuff on her anymore.

It really sucks that she's dating someone else, but going steady with a guy after one month of breaking up with you? That's usually an indication that something's wrong with her.

[junetwentythree]

^ Absolutely agree.

Bro, I highly recommend this book called "The 30-Day Heartbreak Cure" http://www.amazon.com/The-30-Day-Heartbreak-Cure-Getting/dp/1416958878. While it's told from the female perspective, it can definitely work both ways.

[baliwsayo]

The only practical way is to avoid them muna. Try to find another work in another place (libre lang naman mag-apply di ba). Also, get yourself busy.. go out and meet new people. Join a new community. Learn a new sport.

Pero before you can do all these things.. I think you need to ACCEPT muna na hindi na kayo. Mahirap kasi mag-cope kung nasa puso at isip mo pa din na eventually magkakabalikan kayo. 

[yssayjayla]

I suggest you start dating again. 

[mai jung lee]

Ill pray for you.bibihira ang mga guy na kagaya mo magmahal... so you deserve to be happy.smile everything will be fine.

[Foodict]

Thanks for the input mga sis. I was hoping for something proactive and fun like gluing his car doors shut or tazing the guy but it seems those are frowned upon. lol

I'm not leaving town since I know I'm in the right on this one. Tiisin ko na lang until lumipas yung infatuation phase. Too many signs they're not going to last.

[dumpee.o13]

"Stay if you're happy, leave if you're not."

[ettevyvi]

Still struggling with this, too. Especially after I've learned the ex had set their status 'official' in facebook. Damn, it hurts I cannot deny. No, I'm not stalking them anymore, my cousin just told me. Hahaha sabi ko sa kanya huwag na magbigay ng any info about them anymore eh!

But really, distancing yourself would play a big BIG part. We got to let this burn.

[10tequilashots]

Hang out with your friends, go out and have some fun! If you used to do a lot of stuff together, go out and do something new, yung walang memories associated with her. Best not to see her muna though, try to avoid her na lang muna. Hang in there, it'll get better eventually.

[ettevyvi]

Weak moment: why do I feel like they're getting away with everything? Ako na yung niloko parang ako pa yung naagrabyado eh.. Hay. Siguro kasi I'm not that over over them. Getting there and really pushing myself.

[Foodict]

you know what's bloody ironic about my whole situation?

She's the one helping me through it.

I can't expect more than being her best friend and she's being the best friend I've always had.

We never had a big circle of friends. We're each other's closest buddy. So, Im learning to live with the situation and she's learning to grow by herself.

I might just end up in an institution or something, but hell we still have a great time together.