Author Topic: Love is a gamble..but know when to fold. (Read 1579 times)

ettevyvi · « **on:** April 12, 2012, 10:46:43 am »

I've come across a site where I had a clearer insight on relationships. Love is really taking a risk. We give everything and I mean everything in love. We give more time, effort, love whatever because we thought that if we risk more, we end up with more. Just like in gambling. Tataya tayo ng malaki kasi akala natin, tatama tayo ng jackpot. That it will cover up every pain that we felt because in the end, that person will see our worth and ultimately, LOVE us.

BUT, most of the time, it doesn't end up that way. Lalo na kapag we're betting on someone that clearly has nothing to offer. That's when we fold. We fold to see the bigger picture, that there are already red flags, that the person doesn't value our worth, or we just can't accept the reality that they were good before but they are not now. But we dont. We end up justifying the reasons why we stay with them. We end up justifying and make excuses because of fear. The end point is, we settle on the pain and thus, it becomes a cycle... And we get disappointed every single time. Then, we ask ourselves why do these things happen over and over.

tanya1109 · « **Reply #1 on:** April 12, 2012, 11:03:44 am »

when it comes to love you don't count the cost and never expect. Enjoy the feeling of being in-love.

ettevyvi · « **Reply #2 on:** April 12, 2012, 11:28:52 am »

^ But we have to be careful who we give our love to. Especially if we're being in the fantasy and illusion zone. It's nice to love someone who makes us feel better.

Its one thing doing your part of loving the other person and loving blindly.

skyrimgal · « **Reply #3 on:** April 13, 2012, 09:41:25 pm »

I agree... dapat if you're gonna give you're all to someone, you have to at least make sure that he's worth it. i think if you have a healthy dose of self-esteem, mas madali itong gawin.. because you know that you have value and you won't waste your time on someone who obviously doesn't cherish you and the love you are willing to offer.

ettevyvi · « **Reply #4 on:** April 13, 2012, 11:18:11 pm »

^ That's what I'm pointing out sis. It all boils down to self esteem talaga no? Dapat mataas ang tingin mo sa sarili mo, in a good way to overcome this. Kasi most girls talaga, we get stuck on the same relationship kasi we accept poor behavior. Kasi akala natin guys will change. But they don't.. and they never did! Hehe.

jenybasti · « **Reply #5 on:** April 16, 2012, 08:43:31 am »

Quote from: ettevyvi on April 12, 2012, 10:46:43 am

I've come across a site where I had a clearer insight on relationships. Love is really taking a risk. We give everything and I mean everything in love. We give more time, effort, love whatever because we thought that if we risk more, we end up with more. Just like in gambling. Tataya tayo ng malaki kasi akala natin, tatama tayo ng jackpot. That it will cover up every pain that we felt because in the end, that person will see our worth and ultimately, LOVE us.

BUT, most of the time, it doesn't end up that way. Lalo na kapag we're betting on someone that clearly has nothing to offer. That's when we fold. We fold to see the bigger picture, that there are already red flags, that the person doesn't value our worth, or we just can't accept the reality that they were good before but they are not now. But we dont. We end up justifying the reasons why we stay with them. We end up justifying and make excuses because of fear. The end point is, we settle on the pain and thus, it becomes a cycle... And we get disappointed every single time. Then, we ask ourselves why do these things happen over and over.

reading this made me cry

ganito nangyayari sakin ngayon

annika · « **Reply #6 on:** April 16, 2012, 03:22:56 pm »

pashare din sakin sis thanks!

aquacharly · « **Reply #7 on:** May 02, 2012, 01:59:51 am »

Mind the verbs: Use your head. Lose your heart.

Lose your heart - there's the gamble. BUT you can still use your head while gambling.
You don't bet uniformly per round -- you use your head -- so you win some, lose some.
But you gotta win enough to stay in the game. Keep using your head, you get to keep playing.
Use your head, leave while you're ahead... Or just let things take it's course, fold when you've lost it all

.

The thing with truly loving another... Even when you are using your head, is -- it is hard to leave the gambling table even if you have already lost and been forced to fold.
So, when you decide to or you are forced to fold: Best you don't loiter around watching anymore, waiting for a winner's balato. Go, leave.

So kawawa naman tayo when we lose our hearts?
Doesn't have to be that way... Love is a gamble, sure. But smart people do not bring everything they
have to the gambling table. Bakit mo naman itataya or laro lahat eh alam mo na nga sugal yan?

.

Be a smart gambler. Play your cards well. Know when it's time to cash in, and act decisively.
Hindi como sumugal ka eh siguradong talo ka. (I hope I got my Tagalog verbs correct.

)

sakura_bloom · « **Reply #8 on:** May 02, 2012, 02:14:56 am »

Even in love, you can only lose so much.

jamberryknots · « **Reply #9 on:** May 02, 2012, 02:32:41 am »

to TS: super nakaka-relate ako sa article, pwede pa-pm din ng site..
sobrang nakakalungkot lang the situation i'm in right now

ettevyvi · « **Reply #10 on:** May 02, 2012, 11:16:01 am »

Quote from: aquacharly on May 02, 2012, 01:59:51 am

Mind the verbs: Use your head. Lose your heart.

Be a smart gambler. Play your cards well. Know when it's time to cash in, and act decisively.
Hindi como sumugal ka eh siguradong talo ka. (I hope I got my Tagalog verbs correct. )

Yes, I believe in the words you've shared. Really know when to cash in. Sadly, most of us don't.

rianne_mallows · « **Reply #11 on:** May 03, 2012, 03:15:09 pm »

Quote from: aquacharly on May 02, 2012, 01:59:51 am

Mind the verbs: Use your head. Lose your heart.

Lose your heart - there's the gamble. BUT you can still use your head while gambling.
You don't bet uniformly per round -- you use your head -- so you win some, lose some.
But you gotta win enough to stay in the game. Keep using your head, you get to keep playing.
Use your head, leave while you're ahead... Or just let things take it's course, fold when you've lost it all .

The thing with truly loving another... Even when you are using your head, is -- it is hard to leave the gambling table even if you have already lost and been forced to fold.
So, when you decide to or you are forced to fold: Best you don't loiter around watching anymore, waiting for a winner's balato. Go, leave.

So kawawa naman tayo when we lose our hearts?
Doesn't have to be that way... Love is a gamble, sure. But smart people do not bring everything they
have to the gambling table. Bakit mo naman itataya or laro lahat eh alam mo na nga sugal yan? .

Be a smart gambler. Play your cards well. Know when it's time to cash in, and act decisively.
Hindi como sumugal ka eh siguradong talo ka. (I hope I got my Tagalog verbs correct. )

wow.. ibang level ito.. your posts never cease to amaze me

starfish07 · « **Reply #12 on:** May 15, 2012, 05:11:36 am »

Ako rin pa share naman ng site.. Kasi ako puro na lang ako kagagahan.. Alam ko pero ewan basta kailangan na maliwanagan ako or else... Pa pm naman sis

crybaby05 · « **Reply #13 on:** May 15, 2012, 07:08:44 pm »

PM me the site sis. tamang tama sa buhay ko. i gambled and i think natatalo na ko. umalis si bf nung january, 20 months na kami nun.. wala syang work since maging kami.. ngayong sya na may trabaho, nagbago na sya. akala ko ako naman ang sitting pretty at magiintay ng pagaalaga kahit LDR kami. it seems na ako pa rin ang todo bigay kahit na sa dami nyang napangako, wala pa syang natupad. hindi naman lahat in terms of material things, but yung mismong paglalambing, pagsusurprise, wala na.. mainitin pa ulo nya lagi sakin. ako tagasalo ng mga masasakit na salita. i am losing hope but i am still holding on..

jals vins · « **Reply #14 on:** May 24, 2012, 10:03:03 pm »

this is soooo true. when i am in a relationship, i have a tendency to give my all--time, money, and effort. it sometimes reaches to a point where i knowingly neglect other aspects of my life like my friends, family, even my own interests. being so into the relationship makes me feel that nothing else could be better. that all of it is worth it. and i expect the same treatment from him.

today we got into a fight. i can sense changes in his lifestyle which i think do not favor me. i do not believe in "give your love and do not expect anything in return." a relationship is not a charity work. it should be give and take. i have come across this thread before and although i liked the threadstarter's message, it did not struck me the way it does right now. it made me realize that i need to find that balance in myself again that i have tried to hard to achieve even before he came into the picture. i feel that i am investing so much of myself in this relationship and with the way our fight turned out earlier, i thought i should step back a little and think about "how to play my cards well," as what aquacharly so wisely pointed out. sure, i do love him, but.. i must also love myself.

FNMod_Nelly · « **Reply #15 on:** May 27, 2012, 06:30:48 am »

PLEASE USE THE PERSONAL MESSAGE/PM FUNCTION DIRECTLY INSTEAD OF CLUTTERING THE BOARDS WITH PM CALLOUTS. THANKS.

phoebe1811 · « **Reply #16 on:** June 24, 2012, 08:36:19 pm »

maybe you'll fold if you realize that there is something wrong with your relationship or else you you'll still take the risk. and give all you can.

xenos54 · « **Reply #17 on:** June 28, 2012, 06:54:21 pm »

just my two cents..

why is it that the assumption here is.. sooner or later.. kelangan mo mag cash in?
na may ending ang isang relationship?
hindi ba ito parang business na may assumption din na "going concern"?
that the relationship will continue long enough and couples carry out their commitments?

feeling ko po pag serious relationship - or marriage.. dapat bigay todo..
kasi.. ang goal mo dito ay maintain the relationship for a lifetime..

so pag iniisip mo lage yung risk of losing?
ay hindi ka talaga tataya pag ganun..

ettevyvi · « **Reply #18 on:** June 28, 2012, 09:14:14 pm »

^ Its not really about losing but about winnning. Sure, you have to give something. Your all, time commitment, and everything to make the relationship work. Pero sabi nga nila, ibigay mo lang yung kaya mong ipatalo. Kasi madalas nang nangyayari na you give all pero may nangyayari ba? Wala din. You end up feeling beaten up most of the time. More often than not, sino bang talo? Ikaw di ba? Kasi kapag ibinigay mo lahat, as in lahat na tipong respeto sa sarili wala na, dun na pumapasok yung sinasabing 'know when to fold'.

Ang buhay at pag-ibig, kailangan minsan matalino ka din. Hindi pwedeng puso lang at lalo na't di pwedeng hindi ka nag-iisip. 'Yan ang common misconception ng halos lahat ng tao, na kapag ibinigay mo lahat, maganda din ang babalik sa 'yo. Pero pano kung yung taong 'yun, di marunong magpahalaga? Know when to walk away. A person is wiser when he knows what battles he'll walk away from.

aquacharly · « **Reply #19 on:** July 21, 2012, 11:48:10 pm »

^ yup

^^. Cash in, as in figuratively stopping to play when things aren't going ok?
As in: Ngek, maalat today.. okay, tama na muna.. Then they get back in another time, may pondo pang panglaro, versus going bankrupt, ano you will go into debt?? be flexible, don't burn all your boats, search for the aces

Just as with a going concern business -- you lose some, win most. Eh baket ka magpupumilit with for example, an employee/strategy/product line that is making you lose money??? Same same -- be flexible, don't use/ burn all your boats, search for the aces

So cashing in doesn't necessarily mean The End.

News:

Author Topic: Love is a gamble..but know when to fold. (Read 1579 times)