sorry po, wala na ko mapuntahan :( guys i need your advice on this.

[scents01]

hehe..ganun ata talaga sis..marami din akong friends na magtatanong ng advice tapos mega comfort at advice pa ako, in the end yun pa ring gusto nya nasunod hehe at minsan kapag hindi nila nagustuhan sinasabi ko, magtatampo pa..parang kontrabida pa dating ko  kaya kadalasan na lang ng ending ng advice ko malaki ka na, alam mo na ang tama at mali..kung san ka masaya,dun ka (syempre hindi ko naman mabibigay kaligayahan nya)..if they want to learn things the hardest way, go go go!magsasawa din naman siguro sila at matututo na..goodluck kay ts, medyo malaking himala ang kailangan 

[princessrio]

at dahil dyan, tantanan na natin sha.

let her realize kung ano talaga ang pinapasok nya. kung maging successful, we're all happy for you.. pero kung hindi naman, ganon talaga.

[glamorosa_09]

I'm sorry to ask this.

But I'm wondering, where are your parents or guardians?

Hindi ka ba nila binibigyan ng pagmamahal at sobra kang makakapit at makalimos ng pagmamahal sa taong yan.

[scents01]

^^super agree princessrio 

siguro may mga pinagdadaanan talaga sya na hindi natin alam..we may have experienced the same situation but with different circumstances or different family background or different set-up etc..love can be very blinding, she already made her decision, so be it  in fairness, grabe ang effort magadvise ng mga sisses dito ha!

[rae]

Let go of ridiculous beliefs that are holding you back.

Una, on the virginity issue, my current is a great guy. In the early stages of our relationship, he expects I'm not a virgin anymore. That's how great guys are. They don't care if you're a virgin or not.

Second, nag-hohold on ka pa rin sa early stages ng relationship nyo when he was nicer. Take it from another perspective. What if, yung current, yan ang tunay na kulay nya. At first, he's at his best f*ckin foot forward. Wala kang babalikang nicer person, kasi hindi naman sya nice to begin with, nagpapanggap lang.

* * *
Pag-isipan mo din ito. Baka ka head over heels sa kanya, is because, you're as f*cked up as he is. Minsan ganun ang attraction e. We attract the people who are as messed up as we are. Ayusin mo muna ang sarili mo. Hindi ka makaka-meet ng matinong lalake if you have self-respect at self-esteem issues.

Lastly, goodluck. Walang makakatulong sayo kundi ikaw lang. Kahit pa alam mo sa sarili mo ang tama. Kahit overwhelming pa ang response ng sisses natin against that guy, alam ko na pwedeng balikan mo pa din sya.

Think of the kind of person you are becoming. Do you like it?

Naiintindihan kita. Mahirap makipagbreak lalo na kung mahal mo pa. But LOVE is NEVER enough. Nakaka-relate naman ako e. Dumating lang ako sa point na tinanong ko ang sarili ko. Ano ba ang mas mahalaga? Naisip ko na mahalaga ako. Kelangan ko maging matapang at gawin ang tama.

[momentum]

Clarify ko lang. hindi ako galit while giving advice to JENINAJENINA.

I was very much concerned with her. Kelangan kasi maging straight forward magbigay ng advice para matauhan, minsan. I admit ganun din kinailangan ko. masakit, coz THE TRUTH HURTS.

it's up to you, sis JENINAJENINA, if you wish to ignore our advice here. Oo nga naman, bakit ka nag-ask ng help if you already have decided and wished to not listen?and just respond sa maganda lang pakinggan para sayo?

Oh well. Good luck nalang sis and I hope for the best for you, sincerely.
You will learn the lesson the hard way. Your choice.
Pray for guidance.

hangang dito nalang po ako  no further comment. sorry sis JENINAJENINA if I may sound harsh to you, hindi talaga yun intention ko. like what I said, the truth hurts.

lastly, i would like to commend sis fides00, grabe, reading your advice parang natatamaan parin ako dahil sa pinagdaanan ko before. thank you sis for that advice you gave. and to all sisters and brothers here concerned for the well being of JENINAJENINA.

[inluvewithmikewesten]

HE is worth the pain.

REALLY? Wow, you are a martyr and masochist and you need psychological help ASAP. There is something wrong with a any person who believes that it is alright for them to get psychically hurt because of love (or whatever it is).

[fides00]

UMMM. Medyo ngayon ko lang nabasa yung post ko sa normal screen. Thru cel lang kasi ako nag-create nung post. OA KO LANG, ANG HABA PALA. hahaha Medyo damang dama ko yun ah. May pinaghuhugutan lang. Sorry. Haha Sis momentum pasensya na.  Wala naman akong gustong masaktan sa sinasabi ko. Gusto ko lang matauhan yung mga taong dapat matauhan bago pa maging huli ang lahat. Ndi lang sa TS pero para sa mga iba ring nagbabasa.

Anyway, sis JENINAJENINA, inuulit ko, hindi ako galit. Nor am I imposing my beliefs on you. I take that there's a pretty sensible woman inside you amidst that distraught facade. Kasi may dilemma ka nga kung iiwan mo ba siya o ndi. Ibig sabihin, yung mental faculty mo, gumagana pa rin kahit papano kasi you are sensing what the right thing to do is. Yun nga lang, nangingibabaw yung love mo kaya kibit-balikat ka sa mga sinasabi namin. I understand how hard it is to do the right thing pagdating sa love. But you have to understand that what you want to do and what you should do are sometimes different. And if you're faced with that dilemma, it's always better to side with the latter. Ganyan rin naman ako sa simula. Buti ka nga, 1 and a half years pa lang kayo. Kami ng ex ko, 5 years. Mantakin mo, tinagalan ko yung ganung klaseng relasyon ng ganun katagal, believing that as time will go by, magbabago rin yung ugali nung ex ko. I would like to reiterate, ndi naman niya ko sinasaktan physically. (Subukan niya lang, titirisin ko siya. Haha Joke.) Pero andun yung alam kong I was being shortchanged. Naabuso na yung kabaitan ko tapos yung kapalit lang ng lahat ng pagtitiis eh puro panloloko lang rin. Paulit-ulit lang ako pinagsisinungalingan, pinapaikot, pinagtataguan. Ang masama pa niyan, hindi naman ako yung tipong tatanga-t****. Hindi naman sa pagmamayabang, pero alam ko na may utak naman ako kahit papano at alam kong ndi ako nagkulang sa kanya to the point na sabi nga ng ibang tao na bakit ako pumatol dun eh parang I deserve someone better. Ndi ko ininda yun kasi siya nga gusto kong mahalin diba. Sabi ko sa sarili ko nun, sige ok lang kahit para siyang abnoy makipagrelasyon...Mahal ko naman siya. Naniwala ako na pag nakita niyang pinagtiyatiyagaan ko yung kalokohan niya eh ma-rerealize niya kung gano ko siya kamahal at eventually, magtitino din siya. Sorry na lang ako kasi never nang nangyari yun. Hopeful din ako dati tulad mo na tuwing after naming magbati, aayos na siya and that he'll eventually get the memo. Pero pag naihipan na ng hangin, balik na naman siya sa dati. Na-realize ko that there's nothing you could do if ingrained na sa tao yung ugali niya. Pasalamat na nga lang ako na ndi niya ko sinasaktan physically. Pero para sakin mas masakit pa nga yung ginagawa niyang inaatake niya yung kaloob-looban ko kasi yun yung mas matagal mag heal. Sa labas, parang masaya pa rin ako kasi konting sorry lang o lambing, gora ulit. Di alam ng ibang tao, I was lost inside, trying to figure out a way out of the mess I was in. I'm a pretty emotionally stable person pero nung panahon na yun. Grabe day, sinayang ko yung potensyal kong maging Magna Cum Laude tulad ng tatay ko kasi nagpaka-lukaret ako dahil sa pag-ibig. Sa kanya lang ako nag focus at siya yung iniitindi ko. Ndi ako makapag-aral ng puspusan kasi ang gulo gulo ng isip ko lagi. Nawalan ng balanse yung buhay ko. Kaya nga kung i-commend ako ng nanay ni ex eh, grabe rin. Kasi sabi niya, ako lang daw nakakatiis at mukhang makakatagal ng ganun sa anak niyang alam niyang complicated talaga yung pagkatao. Haha

Siguro, ang masama rin eh yung ganyang pagtitiis eh ndi naman dala ng kabaitan. Maraming factor eh. Andun yun na-chachallenge ka. Yung tipong iisipin mo na "Hindi ako susuko. Kaya ko to. Kaya ko siyang ituwid." Andun yung blind optimism na iisipin mong eventually magiging matino siya. Wala namang masama dun pero kelan ba darating yung eventually na yun? Pag may wrinkles na ko? Andun yung factor ng selfishness at pride mo na iniisip mo na hindi mo siya ipapaagaw sa iba. Ang na-realize ko lang eventually eh bakit ako yung na-chachallenge? Hindi naman dapat manggaling sakin yung kagustuhang magbago nung ex ko. Kung hindi siya makakapag-decide sa sarili niya na iwan yung destructive ways niya eh kahit ano pang gawin kong "pagsasalba" sa kanya at sa relasyon namin, balewala. Naisip ko na ok lang naman maging optimistic pero kung yung realidad mo ngayon eh napapabayaan mo na at nagkakada-giba-giba na, pano na? Pano pa magkakaroon ng happy ending kung hindi ka gagawa ng solusyon para maging maayos yung present mo? Kasi ndi naman magic yung pagkakaroon ng happy ending diba? Gradual yan. Eh kung wala namang nagbabago, puro na lang pasakit yung nangyayari? Eh naisip ko na lang, fairy tale ba talaga yung storya ko o Horror/Comedy? Yung sayo sis feeling ko naman, Action/Drama. Naisip ko rin na bakit ko ipaglalaban yung taong yun kung siya nga, walang ginagawa kundi itrato akong kontrabida? Ipinaglalaban ko siya, pero siya kakalabanin ako? Gagawa siya ng bagay na alam niyang ikakasama ng loob ko? Ayoko nang mag subscribe diyan sa thought ng you should fight for love. Naisip ko, if two people really love each other, love will come naturally. May flow. You wouldn't have to fight for it. Kasi willing dapat yung partner mong ibigay yun sayo ng buo, without question and without you struggling. Dapat may peace of mind. Hindi yung para kang siraulo na ndi magkandarapang intindihin kung mahal ka ba niya o hindi. Kasi if it's the latter, addiction yan teh. Obsession. Ndi yan love. Know the difference.

Sorry na talaga kasi andaldal ko. Pasensya na if my tone is harsh. I'm not the type to mince my words especially if I'm trying to talk sense into someone. Sorry to burst your bubble, but you really need the cold truth this time. Pagdating sa love, madalas kailangan natin ng taong susuway sa atin ng parang magulang. Minsan ndi pwede yung 'sige lang, go lang, follow your heart' talk lalo na kung posibleng maging rason ng pagsira ng buhay mo yang tinatahak mong landas. Yun lang. (Yes naman, feeling ko naman ang ikli lang ng sinabi ko. Haha) Good luck! =)

[ecnarfoj]

@jeninajenina, jusko ikaw pa ang sinabihan na magbago?

Please don't hurt me again Physically Let me get hurt through your words instead, ayaw ko na nag-aaway tayo ang tagal tagal na nating ganito, august pa lang anong petsa na, sana naman wag naman natin hayaan na masira lahat ng ito, kasi mahal naman natin ang isa't isa.recently nagkakasakitan tayo, tama na po sana.
help me work this out if you really want us to actually happen. Since sinabi mo na nakikita mo pa rin na tayo talaga sa future, sana naman tulungan mo ko na magwork etong relationship na to. dahil kung sa ngayon pa lang maliliit palang to. pano pa yung malalaking problema na pwede natin ma-encounter sa future, please lang tulungan mo ko. dahil kahit todo effort ako tapos ikaw wala ka rin balak gawin, di ko pa rin kaya isalba ang relationship natin.
at kung madaming beses man tayo nagkasakitan at nagkahiwalayan, sorry na, at kailangan ko na mapatawad mo talaga ako, hindi dahil nag-uusap tayo ngayon, pero gusto ko talaga na patawarin mo na ko sa mga pagkakamali ko dati. kailangan kita.   tulungan mo ko.


at that moment, niyakap nya ko he told me he love me, at sana naman magmature na ako, dahil kahit sya ayaw nya ng ganito. at nagsorry sya.

sa totoo lang mababaw lang ako na tao. sa isang sorry nya lang, he got me trusting him that he wont do it again. hindi ako matigas kasi. isang yakap nya lang lahat ng sakit nawawala. sana lang hindi nya yun sinabi dahil ok kami. kailangan ko talaga ng tulong nya. hindi pedeng ako lang.

So kahit na di ka niya saktan physically pero murahin ka niya ok lang sa'yo? Ipahiya ka niya sa harap ng tao sa paligid mo ok lang. Wag lang pisikal?

You also think maliit na bagay pa lang tong issue ninyo?

Mukhang in denial ka nga sis. Pero mukhang you've made your decision na rin naman na and mukhang ready ka namang masaktan so magdadasal na lang ako for you na sana, mabigyan ka pa ng lakas.

[momentum]

Haha Sis momentum pasensya na.  Wala naman akong gustong masaktan sa sinasabi ko. Gusto ko lang matauhan yung mga taong dapat matauhan bago pa maging huli ang lahat. Ndi lang sa TS pero para sa mga iba ring nagbabasa.

sis bakit ka nagpapasensya? parehas lang naman tayo that we would like to help JENINAJENINA get out of harm's way. and wala tayong balak saktan siya. it's the truth that hurts. gusto ko rin makatulong sa mga tao not to go through what i've been through.

[fides00]

^ korek.  i'm happy that you managed to pull through the mess you were in sis. i'm just hoping that the TS would heed all of our advice so she wouldn't get sucked into the same blackhole. pwede naman kasing matuto ka ng ndi ka nasasaktan basta marunong ka lang duminig sa mga payong pinaghirapang matutunan ng iba. pero if she wants to see for herself. well...wala na siguro tayong magagawa. basta we did what we could.

[Happy Mom]

makikisawsaw lang po ...

siguro kahit ilang kilometro pa kahahaba ang mg advices sa TS e hindi mag reregister sa utak nya kasi nga masyado syang blinded sa nararamdaman nyang love sa bf nya.

jeninajenina, iha, wala bang ibang nagkakagusto sa yo. baka naman kasi natatakot ka lang na masabihan na walang bf kaya pinipilit mo lang ayusin ang relasyon nyo ng bf mo? sabi nga ng nanay ko dati, hindi naman ipa firing squad ang mga single
sana kahit konti e intindihin mo ang mga sinsasabi ng mga sisters natin dito lalo na yung napagdaanan na yung pinagdadaaana mo ngayon.

but in the end ikaw pa rin talaga mag dedecide kasi buhay mo yan. Good luck & God bless...

[shalikah]

At the end of the day you will realize it was never worth it. You wasted a lot of your time and how you wish you could undo the past.

Matigas rin ang ulo ko. Kahit anong advise din sa akin hindi ako sumusunod or mas tamang sabihin hindi ko kayang sundin kahit alam kong iyon ang tamang gawin. Bakit? Kasi masaya ako. Kahit sumira pa ako ng buhay ng ibang tao wala akong pakialam basta ako masaya.

Pero at the end of the day tanungin mo ang sarili mo worth it ba?

[RiverSong]

Yung psyche mo sis jeninajenina, parang psyche na ng battered wife. At ang bf mo, typical abuser.

Nakakalungkot na you are in this predicament, as young as you are, pero the good thing is pwede ka pang umalis.

[books_mags]

ganyan talaga. each of us will learn the lesson at the right time. 
i have been in the same state.  not knowing what to do and just knowing that you love the person. 4 to 5 years din akong nagpakatanga.  then eventually, i got tired and woke up from my fantasy.  kasi fantasy na lang pala na mahal niya ako.  it was hard kasi matagal akong nasa denial state and kahit gusto ko mag move on, bumabalik ako ng bumabalik at nagpapabola.

siguro the ts needs to find her saturation point.  mine came 5 years too late and do i regret it... sometimes yes, bec i might have been happily married now if i didnt waste my time on him.  sometimes no, bec i won't be as strong as i am now if not for all the things i've been through. 

so ts, try to save something for yourself. masarap ma in love.  mahirap marinig ang mga bagay na ayaw natin marinig lalo na pag sobrang in love.  but i think we are all just trying to tell you, the man who will be worth it will never let you cry in the first place.

[fides00]

^ Spot on.

[honey-ecclaire]

After reading what the TS and all the responses of wonderful gals on here...
I'm just waiting for TS to post again saying what "He's the one" bf of her had done to her...
And saying that these concerned advises of our sissies here has point...

Sana lang talaga nagbago ka na,For sure ibang side of the story din yung pinaghuhugutan ni bf mo,He saw you're immature dahil sa pinaggagagawa mo..
You're ECE right?I mean tajing up that course,..Well wala naman sa taas ng pinag-aralan yan eh,..
nasa self-respect yan at pagkatao...

God BLess!
Salamat po sa lahat ng nagbuhos ng time to advice even were not on this situation we learned a lot from your girls....

[candacena]

I've been through a lot of heartaches already. I understand the pain that you are going through.

I'm on another on of a heartache just recently. It's another deep scar in my heart. Probably as painful or even more than what you are undergoing through.

But now I know what to do.

Ganyan ako ka-desperate noong nagmahal ako ng una. I was in college and taking up the same course and same major as my ex. I suffered depression and struggled concentrating through school when I broke up with the guy. It was difficult. Ako ang na-dump.

It took me years before I finally overcome my feelings for that guy. Being away from that guy works wonders. I got my life back.

Now take it from me:
That guy have stopped caring for you anymore. Kung binabalikan ka nya, it's not for the reason that he loves you (even if he said that). Worse pa nga sa iyo, sinasaktan ka nya - any guy who truly, madly, deeply loves a girl wouldn't do that.

Imagine kung naging kayo for life, it would have been worse. It could be one hell of a life.

I agree blocking him out from Facebook and your cellphone should be the first step. But DO NOT try to communicate with him. Hindi ka makakarecover from the pain. I'm saying it again: separation works!

You have to STOP seeing him. Right away!

Kung siya hindi na nakikipag-usap sa iyo, then he has stopped caring for you already. He's just replying to you because you are friends, and that just about it. Nothing further more.

The pain doesn't go away overnight, but believe me, it diminishes day by day. Habang tumatagal lalong less ang pain. The less you think about the guy, the more you can recover. Just do it one day at a time. Life is good. Be with good friends and enjoy the time with them for the meantime.

You don't deserve to have a guy like that. Everyone here is saying that. Please listen to us. Mas magsisi ka if you still want him back.

very well said!! ganda ng payo mo sis. lahat na karelate promise thanks

[shalikah]

siguro the ts needs to find her saturation point.  mine came 5 years too late and do i regret it... sometimes yes, bec i might have been happily married now if i didnt waste my time on him.  sometimes no, bec i won't be as strong as i am now if not for all the things i've been through. 

My regret is that I let go of the right one dahil sa inaakala kong right one who turns out to be the wrong one.  Ngayon having him back is out of my reach and no matter I sugarcoat everything ako yun may kasalanan bakit ganito kami ngayon. And it hurts me more kapag nakikita kong he's happy pero hindi na dahil sa akin.

The TS should really think about her situation 100x.

[freelancer_babe]

very well said!! ganda ng payo mo sis. lahat na karelate promise thanks

Thank you sis! We really hope the TS would really come to her senses.