^Mahirap, but it is not impossible to keep it all friendly-friendly lang. It is your call. You know how guys are -- susubok bka maka score, hehe.
Nobody is perfect. It is but human nature you will be drawn to some people at some time. There are qualities a certain person has you do not enjoy now, so are attracted to. Vice-versa. But the thing is, hindi como boy-girl relationship eh -- tadah! Sex is involved. Hello, once upon a time nung bata pa tayo -- boys and girls played along ok, until the malice of the world colors the relationships di ba?
I have lots of male BFFs. Ganun din, a spark grabs my attention, vice-versa. Then the attraction becomes friendship.. Hindi lang good company.. as in they seek out my company when they need advice, are depressed, have good news to share, need to buy a gift, need to entertain in their homes or have to do business entertaining (hindi ha -- hindi ako singer, lol but I do know about tasteful entertaining, plus protocol
, when they need a mediator or human shield vs an enraged/betrayed GF/wife, etc. And here I am - buhay na buhay pa, hindi pa ko na dead-o ng hubby ko who lives with me 24/7, and is a very very very controlling man.
How do I get away with it? I tell him everything, as in all. Cuentos are what friends make, secrets are what 2 people into monkey business make. I kiss, hug publicly in front of my husband... But darling, have delicadeza -- beso beso but not smooching, hugs but not embraces -- alam mo na yon, hwag ka mag deadma! Lol. I never touch a guy where he may misinterpret my hand message -- on the leg, on the nape, on the cheek, on his heart, on x rated parts but of course!!! Pero madalas ko din sila batukan, slap on the shoulder, kurot sa braso, pitik sa noo. Lol. We are buddies. And I do not go into ambiguous small talk nor texting. And unless your wife is about to kill you -- call only during business hours. Though a male BFF called me once at 1am to get him out of jail. Did I go? No, but I talked to the police station commander to warn him nicely that my BFf better be unharmed when my lawyer springs him later.
In the work place, KAWEN, act professionally. So no idle chatter, no pa cute, no joking around, etc. When you are all out socializing, yon, you can be friendly. What did I just say? You ought to go out as a group, until your friendship is firmly established - no ambiguity, friendship lang tlaga.
Things work out, at times beyond our expectations. You have a BF. You wanna stay loyal too -- sure, why not. You have this office mate you find entertaining, sure get entertained. But use your common sense/better judgment. Being entertained or enjoying yourself doesn't mean you gotta pay the price of feeling guilty/scared baka mabuko, being unfaithful, risking a good relationship for something uncertain, or... Excuse me lang ha .......Scratching an itch. Too high a price to pay. Let things unfold to YOUR advantage. Keep it all friendly until you see more with your mind, not just with your eyes/emotions/boredom/loneliness - that, more than friendship is in YOUR best interest. Sabi ng lola ko: "slow by slow" LOL
So, mga Sis -- do not look at whatever shines & attracts you as Temptation. Naku, you will deny yourself so much laughter and good company. Look at it as friendships - meron mababaw, meron dependable, meron pang good time (hello, good clean fun ha!), etc. Basta pako mo sa utak mo friends lang kayo -- do not stoke your pride/ego: hmm, attracted itong mokong na to sa kin... Hmmm, kaya ko mabighani ito, hmmm... Etc. Do not put yourself in harm's way nga. Set the boundaries, and be firm. Men generally know what "no" means -- kaya lang bilib sila sa powers of persuasion nila; or sa mother nila who states wala nang mas guapo pa sa anak nya; or optimistic sila makaka score ng libre -- hehe. SO, it is all up to us, really, how far we let them go.